by Margaret Kay
Diana nodded, suddenly feeling exhausted. She knew that meant her adrenalin was receding. After the fight-or-flight hormones flooded, when the danger was over a coming down or crash occurred. This feeling was perfectly normal, she told herself. “I do trust him.”
Sloan pulled a small, sealed bottle of water from his backpack. “Are you thirsty?” He twisted the cap off and handed it to her.
“Thank you,” she replied with appreciation before drinking half of it in one gulp. Then the big black man with the bald head approached.
“Hi Diana,” he said softly. “We have not been formally introduced. My name is Landon. The team calls me Lambchop. I am also the team Pastor. Shepherd said that you are a Christian. May I pray with you?”
She didn’t even realize that her head bobbed in the affirmative.
“Father God, thank you for keeping your child, Diana, in your loving and protective embrace during this crisis. Thank you for giving this team the tools and wisdom to locate and liberate her from her captors. We submit to you, Lord, our appreciation for your perfect timing in all things. You brought Shepherd and Diana together when they needed each other the most, providing Diana to Shepherd to heal him and aligning Shepherd in Diana’s life when she needed him to rescue her from this man. We are humbled by your love for us, for your perfect protection and timing. May you fill Diana with peace and healing. Amen.”
Diana gazed at him taking in the contradiction. His words were soft spoken, humbly and reverently. This big man armed with guns and the letters NSA, National Security Agency, across his bulletproof vest, appeared to be a fierce warrior, yet he bowed his head as he prayed, a gentle giant. If she’d have crossed his path in a dark alley, she would have feared him. But here in this moment, she clung to his words of prayers and salvation.
“Thank you,” she mumbled.
Shepherd waited until both the police detective and the FBI lead agent were on site before he brought them into the living room, to Diana. He wanted her to only have to give her statement once. He held her hand as she recounted the horror of the attack, a flaming projectile thrown at her clinic’s front window, the explosion, being grabbed and forced into a car to then have her hands be bound with duct tape and blinded by a black hood placed over her head. She knew she was transferred to a second vehicle and driven to this location; her perception of time distorted. She positively identified her patient, Ben Rosenblum. She told the authorities every word he spoke after the hood was removed in this room.
Shepherd was proud of her. “You did good. It’s over,” he whispered in her ear. His attention turned back to the two men. “I’m taking her home now. You have my contact information if you need anything further.”
“Rosenblum will remain in federal custody,” the FBI agent said. “Doctor Palmer, we’ll be in touch with you and Agent Shepherd if we require any information.”
Diana rose and stepped towards the door with Sam. They passed several police officers on the way. The hallway was crowded with police as well. Once in the elevator, she realized they were surrounded by Sam’s men. When the elevator door opened, Doc and Jackson stood guard. They were in a parking garage.
Doc patted her shoulder as he fell in line, in front of them, escorting her to Shepherd’s Navigator. “How are you holding up, honey?”
“I’m fine, thank you, Doc,” she replied robotically.
Shepherd handed his keys to Lambchop. “Will you drive? I want to be with Diana on the way back to HQ.”
“Of course,” Lambchop agreed. He threw the keys to the agency SUV Delta Team had arrived in, to Mother. Then he climbed into the driver’s seat as Shepherd guided Diana into the back seat. Doc climbed into the front passenger seat. He handed Diana her bag.
“You should get a hold of your mom and tell her what happened. Will she have anyway to contact the patients that are scheduled for Monday?”
“Yes, all our records are in the cloud. My God, I didn’t even think about my patients due for treatment on Monday. And my employees, they all need to be notified.”
“Let your mom handle that for you. I’m sure she is more than capable,” Shepherd said as the vehicle pulled out of the parking garage. Nighttime had crept in and the surrounding area was lit only by the headlights of oncoming cars and the streetlights casting scattered glows over the area.
Diana held her phone in her hand, staring at it. “Will you?” Her voice pled.
“Of course,” he said, taking the phone from her. She had her mom’s contact info pulled up. He hit dial. Peggy Palmer answered a cheerful greeting on the second ring. “Hi Peggy, it’s Colonel Shepherd.”
Zulu
Shepherd had purposefully left the light-blocking shades open when he and Diana went to bed. He wanted the sun streaming in to remind Diana of bright things as she woke Sunday morning. Before he had fallen asleep, while he held her, he received word that Madison had been released from the hospital with only a mild concussion. He’d also sent Joe Lassiter a text message, putting him on alert for a possible appointment.
Diana was withdrawn and sad on the drive back from the city the night before. She refused anything to eat, cried a lot, and just wanted to go to bed. He recognized the signs of her dealing with the trauma she’d just experienced. She needed calm, love, and to know she was safe. After, she would probably need a few sessions with Joe. He’d know after he observed her this morning.
And she needed a plan to rebuild her practice. That he could help her with. He’d already reached out to her mom to get that in motion.
Diana awoke with a start, her mind replaying the horrible events of the day before. Except in her dream, Sam didn’t make it there in time. She was shot and killed, her blood splattering on the plastic sheeting Ben’s men were unrolling on the floor.
“It’s okay,” Sam’s soothing voice said.
She gazed into his dark eyes and fought to catch her breath. “I had a nightmare.”
Shepherd pressed a kiss to her lips. “I’m here and you’re safe.” He tightened his arms around her. He watched her yawn deeply. She still looked exhausted. “Can I get you a cup of coffee?”
“Not yet. Can you just lie with me and hold me for a little while?”
“Of course,” he said. An hour later she showed no signs of either wanting to get up, or of letting him leave her side. She didn’t go back to sleep, nor did she want to talk. “Come on, let’s get up and I’ll make you some coffee and breakfast.”
“I don’t want anything,” she insisted.
He pulled himself from her grip. “I have to go use the bathroom. I’ll be back.” When he returned to the bedroom, he found her curled up in a ball. She was crying again. He embraced her and pulled her into his chest. “Diana, come on, let’s get up and have some coffee, some breakfast.”
“I don’t want anything.”
“Talk to me. What’s going on. Tell me what you’re thinking, why you’re crying.”
She shook her head, overwhelmed with her spiraling thoughts. “I don’t want to talk.”
Shepherd saw that she was in a dark place. “This isn’t good for you.”
“Just let me lie here for one day. Sam, please, I just want one day to hide out and wrap my mind around what happened. Then I’ll be fine,” she begged.
“I called Joe Lassiter While I was in the bathroom. He’ll be here in a few minutes,” Shepherd said.
“Your team trauma counselor? I don’t need to talk to him, Sam.”
“I do,” Shepherd argued. “The woman I love was attacked, kidnapped and now won’t get out of bed. I want to help you, but don’t know what to do. Trying to get you out of bed, to eat breakfast, or even talk with me about what happened isn’t working. I can’t not do something, Diana. That isn’t in my make up. I fix things that are wrong.”
His voice was strong, like a glass of cold water to her face. This wasn’t just about her. It was hurting Sam too. She sat up and nodded. “I’ll talk with him tomorrow,” she tried to negotiate.
“
Today and you can either get up and talk to him in the other room, or he’ll come in here.”
“Let me get dressed,” she said in surrender.
She sat curled up on the couch, wrapped in the soft gray throw blanket, sipping coffee when the knock, announcing Joe Lassiter’s arrival, came to the door. She watched as Sam swung the door wide and motioned the man inside. They talked quietly for a moment before turning to view her.
As he stepped closer, she noticed the scars on his face and neck. He smiled warmly as he reached her. His right hand outstretched to her. “Hello, Diana. My name is Joe Lassiter. It’s nice to meet you.”
She shook his hand. Then he took a seat in the chair across from her. “It’s nice to meet you too. I’ve heard a lot about you.”
Shepherd returned to the room a moment later and handed Joe a cup of coffee. Then he took a seat beside Diana. “Thank you for coming, Joe. I can’t help her. And I can’t cope with doing nothing.”
“I spoke with Madison this morning, as well. She’s beating herself up for failing in her assignment to protect you,” he said, his eyes focused on Diana.
“My God! It wasn’t her fault. That car came from nowhere. She did everything perfectly, was careful, made me stay inside the clinic until she had checked the area out for any threats,” Diana said.
Joe nodded.
“And Sam, you are helping me. Just being here with me. You found me. You rescued me.” Tears dripped from her eyes. “I’m sorry I can’t stop crying. I keep replaying it in my head. Madison could have been killed. Innocent people at the deli could have been killed.”
“But they weren’t,” Joe said. “No one was killed yesterday. Even the man that fired at the team that entered Rosenblum’s apartment will recover. You went through a scary traumatic event. It’s going to take you some time to feel safe again. That’s where I come in.”
“Is it so wrong that I just want to stay in bed today?”
“No, it’s not wrong, but there are other more positive things you can be doing to take control and get your life back. It is a terrifying thing, coming that close to realizing your own mortality. And looking into the eyes of a person who has no problem with causing your death is a shocking thing for a good person to come to terms with. Most people are fortunate enough to not see the real evil that is in the world. You’ve just become one who has. That’s sobering.”
Diana was stunned at how completely he understood it and was able to put it into the words that she did not have. She nodded. “I’m a doctor. I have devoted my life to helping people, to saving lives, and making people’s lives the fullest they can be. My patient, a man I treated to increase his enjoyment of life and alleviate his suffering, was going to kill me. Cold and calculating, he had his people spread plastic sheeting on his floor so my blood wouldn’t stain his carpet.” She paused and sobbed into her hands. “Who does that?”
Shepherd wrapped his arms around her and held her to his chest.
“A cold and calculating murderer, that’s who,” Joe said. “And he was going to murder you to cover up a previous murder.”
Diana had forgotten about that. “That poor man. Did he have a family?”
Joe nodded.
Diana frowned. “I don’t know what to do to stop crying.”
“Feeling emotions is not a bad thing. You need to let it out, the fear, the sadness, everything you feel. Crying is cathartic, a release most of us need. You need to come to grips with those emotions and put names to them, so you know what you’re dealing with. You need to also realize that you are safe now and no one was killed. It is over and you survived it. You will survive dealing with the aftermath of it as well.” Joe’s voice was strong and compassionate at the same time.
“Will I ever feel safe again?” She asked.
Her voice was so pitiful that it hurt Shepherd’s heart. All he wanted to do was hold her and protect her.
“I promise you that you will,” Joe said. “It’s going to take a little time, though, so you need to be patient with the process.”
She took a deep breath and then let out a shaky stream that she tried to control while she calmed her emotions. “What are the first steps?”
Joe’s lips quirked into a compassionate grin. “You’re taking them right now. Confronting your emotions, acknowledging your fears. Talking about it. You are safe here. Do you believe that?”
Her eyes went to Sam. She knew he would always protect her. She nodded. “Yes. I know that I am safe here.”
“And not only because this building is a protected fortress, but because Ben Rosenblum is in custody. What he thought you knew that was a liability for him, is no longer the case. There is no reason for him to ever come after you again, if he had the ability to do so, which he does not and will not,” Shepherd said.
“I know,” she agreed.
Shepherd watched her. There was still something there that bothered her.
“Diana, what else?” Joe asked. “I feel that there is something else there, just below the surface, causing you to feel this way.”
Diana let out another sob. “It’s my fault. Ben knew right where to find us because I told him. I’m so stupid. I talked with my patients leading up to the Memorial Day Holiday about their plans for the long weekend and mine. I told him I was going to my family’s cabin in Wisconsin. I’m sorry, Sam. I,” she said, choking the words out until her voice failed her.
Shepherd gathered her more tightly against his chest. “Shh, Diana. It’s not your fault. Talking with people about holiday plans is normal. You’re a warm and friendly person.”
“Shepherd is right. No victim is ever guilty for what has happened to them. Say it out loud. This was not my fault. The responsibility only lies with Ben Rosenblum.” He waited. She didn’t speak. “I’m serious, Diana. Say it out loud.” He waited until she did. “Say it several times a day or whenever the thought that it was your fault crosses your mind.”
“I will,” she agreed.
Joe Lassiter pulled himself to his feet. “Diana, I encourage you to keep talking about how you feel, your fears, real or imagined. I’ve been doing this for a long time. As long as you do that, you will be just fine. Let’s plan to meet and talk daily for the next few days.” He knew he needed to meet with Shepherd separately as well. He’d make sure of it.
Diana agreed and thanked him. After he had closed the door behind himself, she wrapped her arms around his neck. “I love you, Sam. I’m sorry.”
“You have nothing to be sorry for.”
“I’ve changed my mind on the tracker. I want you to inject it into me.”
Shepherd pushed her an arm’s length away and looked into her eyes. “And I want you to take a day or two and research it like you said you wanted to. Then, when you are sure, we’ll have Doc inject it.”
“I now understand why you keep yourself locked up in your tower, knowing the evil that is going on out in the world,” Diana said. “I can’t believe he burned down my clinic. I worked so hard to make that place happen. All of my staff will now be out of work, patients won’t get treated.”
Shepherd wrapped his arms around her and drew her back into his chest. His heart broke for her. “You’ll rebuild. I’ll help you. The good news is, no one got hurt, and we got the sonofabitch who did it.”
“I know you’re right. I am thankful that none of my employees or my mom were in the building. And that Madison didn’t get hurt too badly.”
He angled her head by gently grasping her chin to look into his eyes. “And I don’t keep myself locked in a tower. I am just always on duty and now you know why, the importance of the work we do.”
“I do,” she agreed. “I just hope you will still have some time in there for me.” Her facial expression was hopeful as she gazed into his eyes.
“I have lots of time for you. And I have a plan.” He tugged on her arm. “Come with me.”
Shepherd drew Diana from the elevator, stepping out onto the nearly vacant second floor. “I only have two te
nants left on this floor. The biggest office suite takes up two thirds of the space.” He brought her to the door closest to the elevator and unlocked it. He swung the door wide and motioned her in, in front of him. “It’s three thousand square feet total. If you need more space, I could move one or both of my other tenants to another floor.”
“Sam, three thousand square feet is more than enough. It’s nearly triple the size of my facility.”
“Well, you will soon be adding Chinese Medicine and acupuncture to your practice. You need more space, and this is available.”
“I need to see how much insurance will pay me out for all the equipment I lost in the fire before I commit to a space this big.” She glanced around the office, taking in the entire wall of windows that flooded the room with glorious light. “And there’s redecorating costs. I really loved how I had the office decorated.” She teared up, still not believing her dream had burned to the ground.