As she looked back on the week, Dani wasn’t sure how she did it or why she didn’t have a breakdown. She did come to appreciate what wonderful friends her parents had. And learned she had a few real ones of her own. If it wasn’t for them stepping in to help her take care of all the necessary business involved in the memorial services, as well as the cremation of her parents’ remains, she wasn’t sure how things would’ve turned out. Now that the dust had settled, the quiet was almost overwhelming after all the activity of the week.
She was worried she wouldn’t be able to concentrate on school work, but the opposite had been true. She’d focused on that and been able to forget the world. Well, almost. Shane disturbed her concentration more than he had the entire time she attended the university. And it wasn’t because she feared she had a stalker. She saw neither hide nor hair of him. With each day that passed, the surer she became he was a decent person with no intention of doing her harm. He had been telling the truth. His pictures of her were merely because she inspired him. And maybe an outlet to cope with his attraction in order to keep on track with his career. What she’d done her first year at C.U. fell more in the realm of stalking than the pictures Shane painted. She’d spent all her free time hanging around everywhere she knew he would be on the off chance he might notice her.
She didn’t want to think about how silly she’d been. She didn’t want to think about him either. This late in the game she couldn’t let her personal life interfere with her career goals, her life plan. She needed to excel on her finals if she wanted to secure a top-notch job in her field. Merely passing wasn’t a guarantee she’d have a job, much less the kind of job she wanted. Boulder was filled with retail workers who had college degrees. Her tragedy, her unrequited love, couldn’t be allowed to screw up her future.
Then she got the call. It was the weekend. The part of the week that was hardest for her because there were no classes to attend. Nothing to distract her. She tried to keep her mind occupied studying for finals, completing the projects that were due, but it wasn’t cooperating. She longed to be with Shane. To see him. To touch him. To hear his voice. She hated his power over her after such a short time together, but she hated herself more. Shouldn’t she be aching for her parents more than him? Was it because Shane was alive and therefore had the potential to be part of her future?
“Hello, Danielle, this is Professor Flanders. I wanted to let you know how sorry I am for the loss of your parents. I hope I’m not catching you at a bad time.”
“Not at all Professor. I appreciate the call. Though I’m rather confused since I’m not a student of yours.”
“Really? But you are engaged to a colleague of mine, so of course I want to express my sympathy, even though we haven’t formally met.”
Her heart started pounding. What the hell was she supposed to do now? She’d completely forgotten about her little story to save Shane’s butt. Apparently Professor Edwards hadn’t and he’d told his boss. Or had he? Was Professor Edwards calling Shane’s bluff in an effort to secure tenure for himself? The last thing she wanted to do was ruin Shane’s career, so regardless of who had told Professor Flanders, she wasn’t going to be the one to disillusion him. And maybe, just maybe… No, not going there. Don’t be stupid, Dani.
“Of course. I hadn’t thought of it like that. I really appreciate your taking the time to call and express your condolences, Professor Flanders.”
“It’s the least I could do. I also wanted to let you know I’m hosting a luncheon at my house with some of the staff of the art department, after the graduation ceremonies. I can’t get Shane to tell me if he’s let you know you’re invited or not. He just mumbled something about you being busy with your graduation, and although I know you’ve most likely got your own festivities planned, I was hoping you could at least pop in, if not for lunch, maybe for dessert later or drinks before? I’m sure everyone would love to meet Shane’s future wife.”
Dani squeezed her eyes shut for a moment and bit her lip. She had absolutely no plans for celebrating her graduation. She didn’t want to celebrate anything. She just wanted to get her degree and get on with her life. Get a job so she didn’t have time to think about anything for a while. Of course, she didn’t dare say anything like that to the professor. He’d given her an out. She could tell him she was booked up. That Shane understood and wasn’t planning on her being there. For all she knew, this was some sort of trap Edwards set up to make Shane look bad. In the end she had no choice. She also had no way of getting in touch with Shane other than showing up at his house or at his office. Not happening unless things were desperate.
“Shane is such a sweetheart. He didn’t tell me about this luncheon because he knew I did have other things planned, but Shane is my future, partying with my fellow-students is my past. Of course I’ll be there. As soon as I can after the graduation ceremonies. My friends will understand, and I think it would be a nice surprise for Shane. Shall we make it our little secret?”
“I have no problem with that. I’m glad you can come. It sounds to me like Shane is marrying someone who has their priorities straight. I’m looking forward to meeting you, Danielle.”
“And I you, Professor. I’m glad you called.”
When the call ended, Dani collapsed on the couch, staring blankly out the picture window in the living room, seeing yet not seeing the view of the Rocky Mountains framed by the large window. Could she even do this without breaking down? All she wanted right now was Shane’s arms around her, comforting her, making her feel safe, making her feel like she wasn’t alone. Like he had that night. Like he had in her dreams ever since then. Did she even have the strength to go to this luncheon and pretend he was hers? To act like they were going to be together forever, something she longed for but couldn’t have? How much could one person take? How could she do this when she’d lost so much already?
Well, it didn’t really matter, did it? She had to now. Like everything else thrown at her lately, she had no choice. She had to deal with it, do what must be done. And she was going to need something glamorous for the occasion. Maybe shopping for a dress and shoes would occupy her mind for a bit. If nothing else, it would get her out of the house. Maybe a couple of her friends could join her. It would be a nice distraction.
She jumped up from the couch, hunting for the car keys and calling some of her friends. She’d caught the professor’s eye wearing jeans and a T shirt. She suddenly wanted to knock his socks off with a stunning dress. It couldn’t hurt, could it? By the luncheon she wouldn’t be a student anymore. Nothing to stand in the way of pursuing a relationship. If she was still his fiancée in the eyes of his colleagues, they’d be spending some time together in the near future until Shane came up with something to end their fake engagement. Maybe their relationship wasn’t doomed after all.
Chapter Seven
The Professor's Secret Page 8