Because of Ellison

by M. S. Willis

  I wanted to catch something. It just wasn’t a damn fish.

  “Sounds good. Do I need to bring anything, like a bathing suit?” I winked and the dimples flew. I couldn’t help it. It was an instinctual behavior that surfaced whenever Ellison was near me.

  The pink that instantly flamed on her cheeks was so fucking adorable. I never knew why people always wanted to pinch the cheeks of chubby little poop monsters in the past, but looking down at Ellison now — I completely understood. When something that adorable is staring a person in the face, there’s nothing you can do but reach over and touch it.

  “That’s probably a good idea. I’ll bring one as well.”

  “That is entirely up to you. If you’re more comfortable in the buff, I won’t complain.” I shrugged. “Seriously, it’s your call.”

  Her smile was brilliant. “You’ve never seen me in the complete buff, Hunter — unless of course there’s something your creepy stalker ass isn’t telling me.”

  It was comfortable. Our encounter. Even though there’d been distant tension in the past week, we were immediately able to fall back into step with one another. And I was fucking ecstatic about it.

  “Well, see you tomorrow, then. I’ll come by in the morning to grab you around six. Or is that too early?”

  I shook my head. She could have picked me up at three in the morning and it wouldn’t have made a difference. If she was going somewhere and she wanted me to tag along, there wasn’t a damn thing on this planet that would stop me.

  ~ ~ ~

  I’m not going to get into the details of what happened on that first fishing trip. Let’s just say it ended in a couple of stitches in my back from where’d I caught my skin with the hook I was trying to cast. It wasn’t a pretty picture and it makes me look like a punk, so I’m not going to talk about it. One thing was for sure, television had lied and fishing was not as fun as it looked.

  After that craptacular adventure, Ellison decided it would be best that I was introduced to her leisure activities slowly and easily. Hiking took up the majority of our time. It was a simple activity that didn’t require the use of pointy objects. It’s not that I was a klutz by any means, but Ellison finally realized my issues with nature and all the things it had to offer. The walks were good. It was rare that I did anything stupid and after the first few times, I was able to pace her with no problem. We talked a lot during those walks — about life, about love, and about things I’d never discussed with another person. Her ability to pull information out of me was astounding and I learned more about myself in those hours with her than I had the entire 19 years I’d been alive. She had a simple outlook on life. There were no complications or strings when it came to what she considered was happiness. She told me numerous times that I had to find what mattered. That I had to keep looking and keep exploring, but that I shouldn’t stop experiencing life while I searched for it. It killed me at times to be around her. She didn’t have much in life and she’d been dealt a pretty crappy hand when it came to what happened to her mother. But she never stopped smiling and she wouldn’t stop trying to rescue me from something I didn’t even know was threatening me to begin with. At times, I thought she knew me better than I knew myself, and I was entirely thankful for her insight.

  “It’s been a month. I’m surprised Bill hasn’t gotten on to you about getting that porch finished.” She walked in front of me as usual and my eyes were following the highlighted pieces of blonde that wound through her braid. Everything about her amazed me — even the color of her hair.

  “Yeah, well he said something about the hikes being good for me so he hasn’t made it much of an issue. I’m sure he’d be less giving if I was just sitting around doing nothing all day.”

  Bill encouraged my friendship with Ellison, and Lily did as well. But they were the only ones. Finn was still nice when he saw me around, and Jake was too oblivious to care, but Henry still gave me the evil eye every time he spotted me. He hadn’t threatened me again and I was thankful for that, but I’d hoped he would warm up to me after seeing that I had no ill intentions towards his daughter. He didn’t. But he didn’t come between us either and I could respect him for that. He was letting Ellison choose for herself and I appreciated that he wasn’t trying to tell her what to do like her brother and ex-boyfriend seemed to do often.

  “Here we are! Thank god, because it’s really hot today.” Ellison ran towards the spring, while stripping off her shirt and shorts and she jumped immediately into the water. I could imagine the shock of the cold water against her skin, and I hated the fact I’d have to experience it as well, but I knew eventually I’d be happy to be cooled down. My clothes were soaked with sweat and the sun shone down without any cloud cover to give us shade. But it was a beautiful day and I was spending it with a beautiful girl. You wouldn’t catch me complaining.

  She splashed through the water in a tiny blue bikini and the light colored straw hat she’d been wearing on the hike. A thin necklace of beads hung around her neck and they bounced over her breasts from her movement through the water. My attraction to Ellison didn’t decrease with the amount of time we’d been spending together — it only increased — and just the sight of her was enough to light a fire under my skin that was painful to endure. I kept to my word though and I never tried to push the line of friendship that she’d asked for the night of the bonfire.

  Stripping my shirt and shorts off, I stepped into the water wearing the bathing suit I’d worn underneath my clothes. Ellison looked up at me for a moment, but then turned to swim farther out to watch the fish I knew she loved. We’d brought snorkels with us a couple of times and I had to admit: it was magical to swim within the school and to watch the waves of their brightly colored bodies edge in around us. It was like existing in an entirely different world and I was glad to share it with her. It was our world that summer; it was our moment together.

  Swimming out to her, I floated beside her and we watched the fish swirl beneath us. Every once in a while, you’d see a turtle swim through the herd and Ellison would gasp each time — even though she’d seen it a million times before. Her innocent excitement was compelling, it was attractive, and it was something I’d never known I’d been missing in other people.

  “That was a big one, huh? Makes you wonder how they swim around as easily as they do with that giant shell on their back. Guess the webbed toes help.”

  I didn’t answer right away and she reached out to grab my hand. “Everything okay?” Her touch sent electric pulses shooting up my arms and I flinched in response to how sudden she’d done it. Turning to her, I squeezed her hand in mine and pulled her quickly to wrap her in a hug.

  “Yeah. Everything’s more than okay. I’m just enjoying the day.”

  She grew quiet, but smiled shyly and returned her attention to the fish, her back was pressed to my chest, my arms were wrapped around her stomach, and our legs brushed against each other as we kicked in the water. The scent of her hair sat just below my nose and I breathed deeper just to have her close by.

  “Some of the test results came back.”

  My arms tightened around her.

  “And? Were they normal?”

  “No.”

  I sighed and rested the side of my head against hers. “What’s the diagnosis?” I didn’t want to hear the answer to the question because I somehow knew that whatever it was, it wasn’t good. The thought of Ellison losing her father scared me. But the thought of her losing him when I couldn’t stick around to take care of her terrified me more than anything else. She was a strong girl, I knew that, but she needed a shoulder to lean on every once in a while. She shouldn’t have to do it all on her own.

  “They don’t know yet; but something’s not right. They just said that he’d have to undergo more tests. You know how doctors are; even if they suspect what it is, they won’t say something until they know for sure.”

  I didn’t want to be the one to bring it up, but I had to know. “What if it’s really bad, El? Wh
at are you going to do?”

  She fidgeted in my arms, but she didn’t pull away. “I don’t know. I guess I’ll keep going. He’d kick my ass if I didn’t. I’ll be angry. That’s for sure. I don’t think it’s fair that my mother was taken from me, and my father after that. Most people get to keep at least one parent until they’re older. Fate would have to be a cruel thing to take both of them from me.

  However, fate could be cruel. I’d realized that over the time I’d known her. What I’d once thought was an awesome childhood full of freedom and carefree days, I now understood was a missing piece in my life. My parents’ inattention bothered me. I could admit it when I was around her. I didn’t have fond memories of just sitting around and laughing with them. There were never times that I could remember just being myself and enjoying my time in their company. Even holidays were spent trying to impress their friends and business associates during the endless parties and social gatherings. We’d never traveled to spend time with family, and never bothered to invite that family to spend time with us. I suspected that his brother embarrassed my father. However, after spending time with Bill, I realized that he had more to him than my father ever would. He’d raised a child on his own and he’d loved her despite the difficulty of his life. He was a good man and I was angry with my dad for never having allowed me to get to know him growing up.

  She turned in my arms. “I’m afraid, Hunter.”

  It was a confession voiced so quietly it was barely voiced at all. But it was enough to awaken every protective bone I had in my body. I didn’t think I’d ever be able to let her go.

  “Are you afraid of being alone?

  Her eyes watered and I didn’t brush away the tears that fell from them because it meant that I would have to let her go to do so.

  She nodded. “It’s not that I’m afraid of being alone because I’ll have no one. I can manage on my own. I have no doubt of that. But to be alone would mean that I lost every person that I cared for. That’s what scares me, Hunter. Knowing that they’d be gone — and that I could never have them back.”

  My heart ripped apart and I pulled her in to me even tighter. Our faces were so close that I could feel her breath roll over my skin and the scent of her strawberry lip-gloss mixed with the tropical scent of her body and hair: sugar and spice — it was a heady and intoxicating combination.

  “I promise you El, somehow, I’ll find a way to be there for you. Even with a thousand miles between us, you’ll always have me if you need me.”

  The brim of her hat shaded her face, but her eyes still danced from the light reflected up from the water. Birds sang in the distance and every so often a chorus of cicadas would belt out over the land as a gentle breeze brushed across our skin. Paradise could never be more perfect than the place where we were at that moment.

  My heart beat soundly against my chest and her chest heaved as her breathing quickened. We stared into each other’s eyes for God knows how long. The tension of the moment was almost too much to bear, but I wanted to give her strength, to really be there for her when she needed me, and I wasn’t going to look away.

  And it was a damn good thing I didn’t.

  The next thing I knew, Ellison James raised her arms out of the water and wrapped them around my shoulders. The perfect pout of her mouth came up to brush across my lips and I closed my eyes when a shudder rolled through me. She placed delicate kisses on my lips — they were soft, they were light and there was no need to rush them. I enjoyed the moment and I worried that she’d realize what she was doing and stop.

  But she didn’t.

  Her fingers curled into the hair at the back of my head and she pulled away long enough to say, “I know that I asked for us to just be friends, and I know that anything more with you would be like shooting myself in the foot. But I can’t help what I feel about you, Hunter. So maybe … maybe if I choose to make the mistake myself, maybe if you’re not the one who started things between us in the first place — maybe I could just own that mistake and not hate you for it in the end.” She laughed quietly. “Whatever happens between us will be a mistake. But which would be bigger? The mistake of having been with you … or the mistake of never having allowed myself to love you when I had the chance?”

  My resolve snapped and my mouth crashed against hers just as she opened her lips so I could deepen the kiss. The skin of our bodies slid against each other while my tongue slid along hers. Her touch, her taste, her smell, every part of her that I could experience, I was taking at that moment. The gentleman in me told me to stop, but then her words repeated in my head, and I decided that, mistake or not, she was correct and it was something that had to happen. We’d denied each other for too long and this moment could be the only chance we had to correct it.

  Chapter Eleven

  My body was tight against her and, even though she was tall, she still felt tiny in my arms. My fingers found their way to her head and I slipped the little tie from her hair and shook out her braid. I’d imagined wrapping my fingers in the silken strands for a long time and I was using them to pull her closer to me and hold her in place. I wanted to devour her; to taste and touch every inch of her skin. I’d wanted it since the first time I seen her pissed off and covered in mud — and I was going to have it.

  Our legs kicked lazily below us even though the top half was moving with a lustful frenzy. With one hand still wrapped in her hair, I pulled her head to the side so I could explore the skin of her neck with my mouth. She gasped when I nipped at her earlobe and I felt her muscles relax against the arm that I still had wrapped around her.

  Goose bumps raced across her skin and I prayed that it was my touch causing that reaction in her rather than the cold as fuck water that surrounded us. Her arms tightened around my shoulders and I took advantage of the added support to remove my arm from her waist. She moaned when I ran my hand along the side of her body and the small sound aroused something feral within me. My thumb brushed across her breast just as my chest rumbled with a growl. An actual fucking growl. This girl was doing things to me that I never knew were possible. Her fingernails trailed down my back and my hand gripped around her hip, securing her body against mine. I wanted to take her right there, but I didn’t want the distraction of remaining above water to distract from the experience.

  Letting go of her hair, I used that hand to explore her body. I found her thigh first, running my hand up the side of it, making a point to rub my thumb along the inside and up along the sensitive skin between. Her stomach was a work of art — not too hard and not too soft. It was perfectly round where it should have been and a primitive instinct flickered within me to touch her there. When my hand found her breast, I paused waiting for a rejection — one that never occurred. I cupped the weight of it in my palm and I used my thumb to rub along the tip that was now hard beneath the thin covering of the triangle top of her suit. The movement of the cold water between us only added to the sensuality of the moment — and the silence, holy fuck, the silence — it let me hear every little sound she made and it kept me there, right fucking there, with her. I was connected to nothing but her. It was something I’d never experienced before and knew I could never experience again with another girl. Nobody would ever compare to Ellison James.

  I pulled the tiny scrap of her top aside and shivered when the heat of her breast warmed my palm. Her head fell back and my lips trailed over her neck. I wanted to take the peak into my mouth, but the fucking water would have drowned me in the process. There’s nothing sexy about not being able to breathe — not when it’s not intended, anyway. I was hard as a fucking rock and I knew she could feel the length of me on her thigh. If she noticed — and trust me, she had to have noticed — she didn’t care. Releasing her breast, I ran my hand back down her body and my fingers dared to reach between her thighs. I wanted her to stop me … I silently begged for it, because I knew that by taking anything beyond this point I’d be giving this girl not only my body - I’d be giving her my fucking heart.

&
nbsp; She didn’t stop me.

  My fingers smoothed over her bathing suit and her body trembled against me. Her mouth slid over mine and we molded to each other like two pieces of a puzzle that had finally found their match. Emotions tore through me that I’d never felt before and I was absolutely lost to her. Nothing would distract me from her. A nuclear bomb could have gone off beside us and I wouldn’t have paid attention.

  When my fingers slid below the fabric of her suit and rested over the entrance to her body, she pulled from my kiss, while at the same time, her fingernails dug into my back.

  “Oh god, Hunter.”

  My name rolled off her kiss swollen lips like it had belonged there our entire lives. I loved the way she said it, and I pushed my finger into the heat of her body only to bring my mouth back to her shoulder and bite down. Her thighs tightened against each other when she moaned and I suddenly needed her out of the fucking water.

  It took everything I had to pull away from her, but when I did, I looked deep into her eyes and the chemistry between us was certain. Neither of us could handle it if we stopped and there was no way in hell I was going to let the water get in between us. I swam towards shore and she followed behind me. When we got to a point where we could stand up, I picked her up quickly and threw her over my shoulder. She laughed loudly and squeezed the cheeks of my ass in her hands. When her nails dug into the skin, I growled again.

  “You’re really pushing for it, aren’t you, woman?”

  She slapped me hard against a cheek and it shoved me over the edge from modern man to caveman. I powered my feet through the water as I walked to shore and laid her down in a bed of grass off to the side of the clearing. I wanted a secluded spot for her, even though nobody had ever been around when we’d been out here. It was our own little piece of the world and I was intent on christening it at that moment.

  Laying my body on top of hers, I was greedy to immediately take her mouth with mine. Her hands explored my chest and shoulders, but then slipped down along my abdomen. I could feel every muscle clench as she brushed across it and when she reached between my legs and wrapped her palm around the length of me, my body bucked against her. My teeth instantly found her bottom lip and I bit down into the swollen flesh softly, but desperate for more at the same time. My bathing suit had become a fucking nuisance and I wanted to rip it off, but I didn’t want her to think I was going to rush this.