“All right.”
Once they were alone in the room, Kayla started to feel even more awkward. This guy wasn’t like anything she’d imagined, which made her kind of embarrassed. She’d taken a lot of guesses and questions and spun them up in her mind to make him into someone really strange.
She knew better than to let her imagination run rampant, too. Mamm always said it was better to give people the benefit of the doubt. She should have remembered that.
“Have a seat,” she said, then took her aunt’s wheelie chair. “So, you intend to take the GED?”
“I do.”
“I heard you want to work on math?”
“Jah. And vocabulary. When I skimmed through a study guide at the library, I realized that there are a lot of English words I’ve never even heard of.”
“I felt the same way.” She wrote that down. “Back when I was preparing for the test, I made up a schedule. We might want to do the same thing. When is your test?”
“I’m not sure.”
That drew her up short. “No?”
“I’m not in a real big hurry to learn everything. I thought we’d take it one step at a time.”
“Are you sure you want to prepare that way? You might pay for lessons you don’t need otherwise.”
“I’m not worried about that.”
“Really?” She was shocked. Does he really have unlimited funds?
He frowned. “I don’t see how my financial situation matters to you.”
“It doesn’t. I was just surprised, that’s all.” Hoping to ease the tension that was brewing between them, she joked, “I forget that everyone isn’t on a tight budget like I am. My mother used to say I never met a penny on the ground that I didn’t pick up.”
He didn’t smile at her comment. If anything, he looked even more uncomfortable.
Starting to worry that they were never going to find a connection, she said, “Before we get started, maybe we could talk for a few minutes?”
He made a show of checking the time, which was a bit irritating since he had arrived five minutes late.
“Jah. We can talk. Um, what would you like to talk about?”
“You. Me.”
His hazel eyes flared. “You want to discuss us?”
“Jah. I mean, nee Nee, I do not.” She felt her cheeks heat. “I mean, I have some questions.”
“All right. Sure. What do you want to know?” He looked even more uneasy.
What is his deal? “Okay. I’m going to start with the most obvious. Did you read my fees? Are they all right with you?” Though he wasn’t very forthcoming, there was something about him that she wanted to know more about. She found herself on pins and needles while she waited for his answer.
He patted a pocket. “Jah. I have your twenty dollars ready. Do you want it first? Is that how you like to handle your classes?”
“No. I just wanted to make sure you understood my fees.”
“I understood them fine. Anything else?”
She wanted to ask why he was being so distant and prickly. After all, she was only trying to do him a favor. But because that seemed kind of harsh, she murmured the first other thing that came to her head. “Do you intend to stay Amish?”
His whole body stiffened. “I do.”
For some reason, she’d offended him, but she wasn’t sure why. Was asking such a thing really that intrusive, given the circumstances? She felt her cheeks heat. “I guess what I’m getting at is: Why are you studying for the GED on the sly? Aren’t you done with school?”
“Is it any of your business?”
He could try the patience of a saint. “Uh, yeah,” she blurted, giving his rudeness right back to him. “I might be getting paid for this, but I still need to help you. I can’t help you study if I don’t know what you’re studying for.”
He stared at her a long second. “Fine. I’m going to take the GED for a specific reason.”
“Which is?” she asked before she could take it back.
“Beg pardon, but—”
“Sorry, but if we’re going to be spending so much time together, I really do think knowing the reason will help me help you. So, are you going to try to go to college?” He was already stretching things by educating himself on his own, but to enter a college? Well, she seriously doubted there was a group of elders in any church district around here that would allow him to keep his faith and attend college.
“Nee.”
For a second, it had looked like he was going to add something, but he didn’t. That pause felt like he was keeping something important from her, as if he were speaking in riddles. She found it annoying. Though a bunch of questions were running through her head, she tamped them down.
If she pried into his life much more, she could be accused of acting exactly like he was—rude and intrusive. “Okay, I’ll get some GED study guides from the library and help you with the math and vocabulary they suggest.”
“What about today?”
“Let’s work on vocabulary words.” She had been going to work on math with him, but she wasn’t sure what he knew. And he was so prickly that she didn’t want to risk offending him even more by asking. However, she had stuck a list of SAT words in her tote bag that morning, a list from back when she’d been studying so hard. She’d had big plans then, plans to score so highly on the GED that she might even get a scholarship to college.
Of course, that was before she’d realized she had to make different plans.
Pulling out the list, she asked, “Did you bring a notebook?”
“Nee.”
“You’re going to need one soon,” she said as she flipped through her own and tore out a sheet. “But we can start on this.” She slid the paper and a pen toward him. “Okay, here’s the first word. Frugal.”
He picked up the pen but didn’t do anything. “What do you want me to do?”
“Write it down. Do you want me to spell it?”
She could practically see the muscles in his cheek work as he debated answering. Finally, he nodded. “Frugal F-R-U-G-A-L.”
He wrote down the letters in perfectly neat print. “Okay?”
“What do you think it means?”
“Not spending a lot?”
“Yep. Avoiding waste. Write either of those definitions down.”
It took him a minute, but he wrote down the definition she’d given him. “Now what?” he asked.
She paused. Up until now, all of her tutoring experience had been helping kids with their homework assignments. She had no experience making up study guides. But she knew how she studied. “Use it in a sentence.”
“Like how?”
“Like you were talking to me or one of your friends. Go.”
“I’m not going to use that word in a sentence to a friend.” He looked at her like she had two heads.
“How about a brother or sister?” What did it even matter? Why was he making it so hard? When he looked like he was about to argue again, she said, “Stop fighting me, Aaron. Believe it or not, I’m trying to help you. Now, please pretend!”
“Fine.” He took a moment, then said, “We act real frugal when we butcher chickens. We use every part, even the feet, in the stew.”
She felt like she was about to throw up, but just as she was about to grimace, she saw a look of amusement in Aaron’s eyes. “That’s good. Here’s the next word: ostentatious. I’ll spell it: O-S-T-E-N-T-A-T-I-O-U-S.”
After he wrote it down, she said, “It means ‘intended to attract notice or impress others.’ ” She felt a bit of satisfaction watching him write down the definition without her prompting.
Then he looked up. “Like one might wear ostentatious clothes to impress friends.”
She noticed he was giving her a funny look. “What?”
“What do you mean?”
“You’re looking at me like I’m ostentatious.”
“You’re the one wearing that necklace.”
She pressed her palm to her chest before even
thinking about it. Years ago she’d seriously contemplated leaving the faith. She’d had a rocky rumspringa and had spent a lot of her days among the English.
One of the jobs she’d taken had been at a big super center, and when she quit, the lady who’d been her confidant and mentor had given her the gold charm with the scrollwork that now bit into her skin. She noticed Aaron was staring at her chest and immediately dropped her hand.
This time he looked away with a faint blush to his cheeks. “Next?”
“Next? Oh.” She scanned the page. “Um, tenacious.”
“I can’t even begin to spell that.”
“I never can spell it by myself, either.” After spelling it out loud, she said, “It means ‘to be stubbornly unyielding.’ ”
He narrowed his eyes. “I still don’t get it.”
“You know, like never giving up. Ah, like…” She thought fast. “That athlete is really tenacious. He keeps competing even though he’s bruised and sore.”
“I like that one,” he said.
She smiled at him. “Me, too.”
Something shifted between them, and before she knew it, her aunt Pat poked her head in.
“Sorry, you two, but your time is up.”
Aaron started. “That went by fast.”
“I thought so, too.” Kayla closed her notebook and stuffed it in her backpack. “Do you want to meet again next week?”
“Yeah.” He pulled out a twenty-dollar bill and handed it to her. “I’m sorry it took me a minute to get started.”
“You mean that you were rude?”
He rolled his eyes. “Uh-huh.”
“It’s no big deal.” Well, not anymore. Somehow she’d started appreciating his prickliness. “I just needed to know how to help you.”
“The truth is that my family doesn’t know about this.”
“Why not? Would they get mad at you?”
“They just wouldn’t understand.”
“Because you want to go to college?”
“I wasn’t lying. I don’t. I have no plans to leave my faith or go to college. I… I just want to do something hard, you know? I want to challenge myself to do something I didn’t think I could.”
“Jah. I get that.” Unfortunately, she really got that.
“Truly? Well, gut.” He stepped back. Now that their session was over, he looked a little more lost. “Well… thanks. I better go, and I guess you should, too.”
“See you next week, Aaron.” Just as he turned away, she remembered they didn’t have a way to communicate with each other. “Hey, wait a sec.”
“What?”
She ripped off a corner of one of her papers and scribbled down her name and two phone numbers. “The first one is my phone number here. The second is the phone in my kitchen.”
“Are you New Order?”
“I am. Do you have access to a phone?”
“We have a shanty down the road. I work at the furniture store, too.”
“Okay, we have a plan, then. We can call each other if one of us can’t make it or something.”
He looked at her writing and smiled. “You might be real smart, but you’ve got crappy handwriting.”
She was so shocked that he had said “crappy” that she started laughing. “I know.”
He grinned at her before walking out the door.
She stayed where she was, beaming at the empty doorway. She had to be at least four years older than him. She knew for a fact that she’d done a lot more than he ever had in his sheltered life. But he’d done something no one had been able to do for her in years. He’d made her feel like a girl again.
“Kayla?” Aunt Pat called out. “Do you want a ride, honey?”
“No. Thanks, Pat.” When she met her at the door, Kayla noticed she already had her keys and purse out. “Thanks for waiting.”
“No problem. But next week you can lock up.”
“Yes, ma’am.”
As they started walking to Pat’s car, she looked at Kayla worriedly. “Are you sure you don’t want a ride home? I could run you by a fast-food place.”
Pat knew things were pretty sparse at home.
“Nee. I have my bike. Plus, mei daed said he was going to the store.”
“Oh. Well, that’s good.”
She sounded skeptical. Honestly, Kayla was skeptical, too. Her father had a difficult time these days doing some of the easiest tasks.
There was a good chance he hadn’t gone, but she was too old to tell on her dad. Or to try to make him change.
However, she’d learned to pick her battles. She already had a lot on her plate—her job at the sewing shop, her tutoring, and their constant financial worries. Then, there were her private sources of pain: she missed her mother, worried about her father, and regretted everything about Levi.
Jah, there was a lot about her life that she didn’t want anyone else to know.
Aaron might be surprised to learn that she had just as many secrets as he did, and she was sincerely hoping he would never find out about them.
It was better if most people in her life never did.
four
• RULE #4 •
Bring an extra set of clothes. I promise, one day you’re going to be glad you have them.
If she hurried, Kayla could make it to the bookmobile near the old Amish schoolhouse before it moved on to the next location. After quickly saying goodbye to Aunt Pat, she slung her backpack over her shoulders, hopped on her bike, and pedaled as fast as she could down a back alleyway, across a vacant lot, and then down an old county road that hardly anyone seemed to use since the Troyers sold their land to a developer who was in no hurry to do anything with it.
She knew it was silly to make such an effort to catch the bookmobile instead of simply going to the library in town, but Sarah Anne always knew what books she would like.
When she came to a stop sign, she barely stopped long enough to check how busy the intersection was before rushing through. She pedaled hard to reach the crest of the hill, and then she spied the bookmobile in the distance. Though she was too old for such things, she felt like pumping her fist in the air and giving a shout of thanks. She’d made it!
Sarah Anne grinned when Kayla pulled open the door and stepped inside. “Kayla! Now isn’t this a nice surprise!” Taking in her pink cheeks, she added, “You look like the wind blew you in.”
“I was afraid I was going to be too late.” Seeing that it was almost half past six, she added, “I’m so glad we’ve had a spot of dry weather. If it had been snowing, I wouldn’t have been able to ride my bike to work.”
“I’m glad you made it here before I left, too.”
“I promise I’ll hurry.”
“I don’t need that promise. I can stay a few minutes later if need be.”
“Are you sure?”
“Very sure. Now, try to relax, dear. After all, you’re surrounded by friends.”
By “friends” she meant the books. Perhaps it sounded a bit corny, but Kayla knew it was true. Books had saved her life a time or two. Well, at least, it felt that way. “I’d love to sit and visit, but I should probably leave as soon as I can. I’m sure mei daed is home by now.”
“Of course, dear.” Bending down, Sarah Anne pulled out a stack of four books and set them on the countertop. “I must have had a sixth sense about seeing you sometime soon because as soon as I saw these come in, I put them aside for you.”
Kayla scanned the authors’ names, the titles, and finally the beautiful covers displaying handsome men and fresh-faced young women with white kapps on their heads. Everyone looked so very much in love. “Oh, danke! Thank you so much.”
“It’s not only my job, it’s my pleasure, dear. Who else would I bring these Amish romances to if not my favorite Amish romance reader?”
She could feel her cheeks flush. Honestly, she was a little bit embarrassed by her love for the books. The moving stories, all filled with happily ever afters made her so happy. They were her secret ad
diction, her catnip, the way she was able to sleep at night. They were how she’d gotten through the last three years.
Before that?
Before that, she’d had hopes and dreams that one day she was going to have love and romance, too.
“May I have all four books? I promise I won’t keep them long.”
“Of course, dear. Hand me your library card, and I’ll check them out so you can get on your way.”
This was why she pedaled all over the county and had memorized Sarah Anne’s schedule. She did things like this. “Danke,” she said again as she carefully placed the books in her backpack. “I’ll see you soon.”
“Be careful going home, dear. It’s dark out, you know.”
“I’ve got lots of reflectors on my bicycle, but I will. You be careful, too.” After exchanging one more smile, Kayla hurried out to rush home, hoping her father had made it there all right, too.
She’d lied when she’d told Sarah Anne that she feared her father would worry where she was. Kayla was fairly certain that he wouldn’t worry at all.
* * *
When she arrived home, she realized her guess had been right. Daed wasn’t home. She bit back a sigh. This was why she always had a schedule and planned things out carefully. Her father was a good, but erratic, man.
Pushing her disappointment to one side—really, it did no good to start wishing he was different—she decided to do the dishes. As she’d expected, the sink was practically full.
But there was also a note that said he was going to go to the grocery store today. Knowing just how empty their refrigerator was, she gave thanks for that.
After making a cup of hot tea, she pulled out her books and decided to focus on them instead of stressing about her new student or her father’s whereabouts. Yes, it was much better to think about getting swept away and falling in love instead of dwelling on things that couldn’t be changed.
* * *
“Sorry I’m late, Kay,” Kayla’s father called out almost an hour later. “And even though I never made it to the grocery store, I did bring us home some dinner.”
So, their cupboards were going to stay bare.
A Perfect Amish Romance Page 3