by Pandora Pine
“She’s fine.” Ben leaned in to whisper. “The dried blood isn’t hers. It’s Rem’s.”
Dec gasped, feeling his knees go weak.
“Come sit.” Ben grabbed his elbow and led him over to the waiting room chairs. When they were settled into the hard plastic chairs, Ben wrapped an arm around Declan’s shoulders. “I got here only a few minutes after you called me. I read Gemma’s chart and she’s fine, aside from the scratches you see. They’re from broken glass.”
“What happened, Ben?” Gemma whimpered against his neck, wrapping her arms more tightly around his neck.
“From what the paramedics on the scene told me, Rem’s car was hit on the passenger side while he was making a left turn. The driver ran the red light at the intersection of Low Street and Route 1 and t-boned Rem’s car.”
“Route 1? What the hell was Rem doing down there? Little Wonders and his house are on the other side of town.”
“Muffin day,” Gemma grumbled.
Muffin day? “Oh, you mean Rem was going to get muffins at the supermarket?”
Gemma nodded, burrowing her face into Declan’s neck.
“That explains why he was there.”
“The other driver walked away without a scratch.”
Of course he fucking did. “Why did he run the light?”
“Told the cops he was late for work.”
Christ wasn’t that always the way? One asshole thinking he was more important than anyone else. “Did they arrest him?”
Ben’s face looked grim. “The cops sighted him for reckless endangerment and let him go.”
Dec felt like his blood was boiling. “They let him go with just a ticket?”
Ben nodded. “For now. If anything happens to Rem…”
What Ben was struggling to say was that the cops would arrest the driver for vehicular manslaughter if Rem died. Jesus Christ, things just kept getting worse. “How is he, Ben? Truthfully, none of that ambiguous platitude bullshit.”
“I wasn’t able to get any information out of the doctor treating him. The head ER nurse said he’s got a broken right tibia and a head injury. You know how head injuries are, Dec, they bleed like hell. That’s where all of the blood on Gemma came from. The car was hit and then spun into the guardrail. The paramedics said it was the driver’s side that hit the guardrail and that’s what caused the head injury.”
It really was a miracle that Gemma hadn’t been hurt at all. He held the little girl tighter and prayed God would spare Rem.
He'd been such an idiot when it came to his stubborn ex. It didn’t seem fair that just when he was determined to get Rem back that something like this would happen to derail their relationship again. He refused to believe that he and Rem were not destined to be together.
“Jesus Christ, Declan! Gemma!” Rainier shouted as he ran toward them. “Are you okay little princess?” He wrapped his arms around Dec and Gemma, pressing a kiss to the side of Gemma’s head.
“Uncle Rainy!” Gemma reached out for him, but didn’t let go of Declan.
“Where’s the doctor? What do we know about Remy? Where’s the asshole that did this to my family?” Rainier’s dark eyes blazed with fury.
“Calm down, Rainier,” Ben said softly. “Come with me and I’ll tell you everything I know.” Ben stood up and walked with Rem’s brother toward the hallway.
Declan knew Ben didn’t want Gemma to hear the gory details of what happened for a second time. He took this quiet time to look down at Gemma who was shaking a bit and clinging to him like a starfish on a rock. “How are you doing, love bug?”
Gemma sniffled and looked up at Dec. “I’m scared, Dec. Is Uncle Remy gonna be an angel like my Mommy?”
Declan’s heart broke in that second. How the hell did he even answer the question? Did he lie or tell Gemma what he knew? He decided to go with the truth. “I don’t know, honey. The doctors are trying to help him.”
“What’s gonna happen to me if he goes to heaven?” Gemma’s bottom lip quivered.
God almighty, he was not equipped to handle that kind of question.
“No one is going to heaven today,” Peg McKinnon said, taking the empty seat next to Declan.
“Grams!” Gemma climbed into Peg’s lap and hugged her tight.
“I brought her some clothes to change into.” Peg leaned close to Declan and kissed his head. “Remington is a strong boy. He’s going to pull through this and then the two of you can get yourselves sorted out.”
“I took your advice. I showed up at the school with flowers and when I got there, everyone was freaking out because they didn’t know where Rem and Gemma were. It was awful, Peg. I can’t lose him. I just can’t.”
“And you won’t, Declan. I’m gonna get Gemma changed and then we can talk some more, okay?”
Dec nodded absently. He’d meant every word he’d said to Peg. He couldn’t lose Rem. Even though they were broken up and hurting, Declan knew Rem was the man he was destined to be with for the rest of his life.
“Hey.” Ben gave his shoulder a squeeze and pointed to the door leading to the emergency room. A doctor in blue scrubs was walking into the waiting room.
Declan’s heart froze in his chest. The doctor wasn’t smiling. Jesus, please don’t let the doctor tell me Rem is dead…
19
“Declan O’Toole?” the doctor called out.
“I’m Declan.” He stood up and made his way over to the doctor. Ben and Rainier were right behind him. One of the men had a hand on his shoulder, but Dec was too intent on the doctor to look behind him to see who it was.
“I’m Doctor Shultz. I’m the one who’s been treating Remington since he came into the ER.”
Declan breathed out a sigh of relief. If Rem were dead, the doctor would have said he was Rem’s doctor. “How is he?” His hands twisted together, anxiety roiled through his gut.
“The next twelve hours are crucial. Remington sustained a skull fracture. Due to the force of the impact, his brain is swelling. We’re doing all we can to control this.”
“I know that’s what you’re supposed to say, Jack. Now tell us what’s really going on.” Ben wore a serious look on his face.
Jack met Ben’s gaze and sighed. “It’s still too early to tell, Ben. Like I said we’re doing everything we can to contain the swelling. I’ve paged the best neurologist on staff to come in and assess Remington’s condition, but haven’t heard back from him yet. We have a few solutions left to try, but right now I’d say he’s got a fifty-fifty shot of pulling through this.”
“When can I see him?” Declan’s stomach was pitching like a rowboat on storm-tossed seas. “He needs to hear my voice and know how much I love him.”
The doctor nodded. “We’re in the process of moving him to ICU. I’ll let you know when you can see him.”
Declan took a step forward. “This man is the love of my life. He’s just adopted his five-year-old niece whose mother died from cancer back in January. We can’t lose him, Doc. Please save him. Save Rem.”
Jack set a hand on Declan’s shoulder. “I promise you I’m doing everything humanly possible. I’m going back to see him now and will be back for you when he’s settled.”
Dec nodded and watched the doctor go back into the ER. Fifty-fifty odds weren’t the best. On the other hand, it wasn’t the worst news he could hear either.
“Jack was talking about Tim Cassiday. He’s one of the best neurologists in the country. If he’s coming in to consult on Rem’s case, he’s in very good hands.”
Declan broke down, tears pricked his eyes and he pulled Ben into a tight hug. “I love him so much, Ben, and I didn’t tell him. I just walked out of his life because I was being petty and stupid. Now I might never be able to tell him how much I love him.”
“Don’t say that!” Peg said from behind him. “If you act like it’s over, then Rem will too.”
Dec turned around to face her. Peg was holding Gemma who had changed into fresh clothes. “I don’t know what
to do.”
“Of course you do.” Peg set a hand against the side of Declan’s face. “You go up there and tell Rem how much you love him and that you’re going to be there until he wakes up. Tell him funny stories from your time together. Read him his favorite books. Hold his hand and don’t let go until he’s awake and begging you to shut up!”
Dec nodded. He could do that. “Okay.”
“I’m gonna take this little miss back to her house so we can pick up Blackie and some things for a sleepover.”
“Thanks, Peg. I really want to stay at the hospital with Rem.” At least he wouldn’t have to worry about Gemma. He knew she’d be safe and coddled at Peg and Mitch’s house.
“NO!” Gemma yelled. “I don’t wanna go!”
Dec and Peg exchanged alarmed looks. “How come you don’t want to come home with Grams?” Peg rubbed Gemma’s back.
“I don’t want to ride in the car. What if we get in another accident?” Fat teardrops rolled down Gemma’s cheeks.
He didn’t think it was possible for his heart to break any more than it already had, but it did. “It’s okay, Gemma. The bad man who hit Uncle Remy’s car can’t hurt you again.”
“What if there’s another bad man?” A wave of fresh tears flowed down Gemma’s face.
Gemma had a point. This was Massachusetts. There were bad, impatient, and aggressive drivers everywhere. Dec was at a loss for words.
“Grams is the best driver in the world, honey,” Ben said. “She won’t let anything happen to you. Plus what about Blackie? She’s home alone and scared. She needs you.”
“I need Blackie too.” Tears rolled down Gemma’s face. “I’m scared, Grams.”
“I’m scared too, sugar plum, but we have to be strong for Uncle Remy, right?”
Gemma nodded miserably.
“Why don’t we go get Blackie and then some lunch? How about a Happy Meal?”
Gemma nodded, her little body relaxed against Peg.
“I’ll call the minute we have news.” Dec pressed a kiss to Gemma’s head.
“Maybe text. I’m thinking an N-A-P is in order.”
“That’s a good plan, Peg. Thank you so much for taking care of her.” Dec kissed Peg too. He’d come to think of Bronson’s mother as his own over the last few days. He was so blessed to have Peg McKinnon in his life.
“Make sure you tell Rem how much you love him the very second you get up there. Tell him I love him too.”
“I will.”
“Tell Uncle Remy me and Blackie love him too.” Gemma leaned over to kiss Declan.
Dec hugged them tight and watched as they headed toward the car.
“I’m coming with you, Peg,” Rainier called after them. “Maybe I can help get Gemma settled in the car.”
"Ben, Declan?" Jack Shultz popped his head into the waiting room. "You're all set to head up to ICU to see Remington."
"Rem," Declan said. "His name is Rem."
Jack squeezed Declan's shoulder. "Rem is settled into his room. Ben can show you the way. If you need anything, don't hesitate to call me."
"I know with ICU, they only let family in to visit. We have a close circle of friends who are our family."
"They'll be allowed in no problem."
"Thanks, Jack." Ben slapped a hand on the doctor’s shoulder.
The doctor nodded as Ben led Declan past him and toward the elevator.
Ben pressed the button for the fourth floor. "Just be prepared, okay. He's most likely going to be bruised and bandaged up and probably on life support.”
"Okay, thanks for the warning. I didn't even think of that. I can still see him the way he looked that last day in New Hampshire when I walked away from him."
"Don't think like that, Declan. You need to be strong and positive for him. That's what going to help him heal."
Dec could do that. He had to do that. Rem was counting on him and for once, he wasn't going to let him down. "Ben, you're going to need to be there for Knox."
Ben looked confused. "Knox?"
"He's one of Rem's best friends and he's alone here. He has no family and no one to lean on. You need to be his shoulder to cry on through this."
"I'm sure I'm not the right man for the job." Ben looked down at his feet.
"Cut the shit, Ben. We're about see Rem all banged to hell. He might not make it through this. Don’t be a stupid ass like me and deny Knox the comfort he needs. Now isn't the time to tell me you don't have feelings for him."
Ben sighed. "Knox is maddening, always saying inappropriate things. I just..."
"Just be there for him. Bring him pizza. Hug him. Spend the night watching old reruns of Little House on the Prairie."
Ben snorted. "Knox likes that show?"
"He loves it. Take care of him. Rem and Nash are all he has."
"Okay. I will."
**
The elevator pinged and the doors opened on the fourth floor. The tiles were faded with age but were clean. Declan had never been to this part of the hospital before. It was quiet. Too quiet. "This place is creepy."
"ICU isn't meant to be pretty." Ben’s voice was grim.
"Maybe it should be. Give people a warm, happy place to heal instead of this sterile environment."
Ben held the door open for Declan and then steered him toward the nurses' station.
"We're looking for Remington James."
"He's in room four, Doctor Wagner."
Ben nodded his thanks and tugged Declan toward the patient rooms.
Declan took a deep breath and stepped into Rem's room. It was worse than he could have possibly imagined. Rem was hooked up to so many machines with tubes everywhere. Machines were beeping and his right leg was in a cast and elevated. Bandages covered his head. "Sweet Jesus," Declan whispered.
Ben wrapped an arm around his shoulders. "He's alive, Dec. Focus on that."
Declan walked toward the bed. "Rem, you lazy bum. Look at you laying in bed at lunchtime on a Friday. All you had to do was call me if you were interested in a little afternoon delight." Dec could feel tears stinging his eyes.
He took a seat in the blue chair near the bed and picked up Rem's limp hand. Thankfully it was warm. "Gemma's okay. She's with Peg and is going to spend the night. She's safe Remy. You kept her safe." Declan lost the battle as his tears started to course down his cheeks.
"Ben's here too. He says you've got the best doctors on your team. A real dream team," Dec laughed trying to rope his emotions back under control.
"I'm here Remington James and I'm not going anywhere until you open those gorgeous dark eyes and tell me to leave. I love you, Rem. I've always loved you. I need you to wake up and tell me you love me too. I know you do, you stubborn bastard."
Ben snorted from behind him. "Smooth Dec. Real smooth." He stepped up to the other side of the bed and seemed to be studying the readouts of the various machines. "They have him in a medically induced coma."
"What does that mean?"
"It gives his body a chance to heal in a pain-free setting. He can hear you talking, but he's not going to wake up while he's on those meds."
"Do you remember that time we went away to the Cape for a long weekend and it rained the entire time. We planned to go kayaking and take surfing lessons and all it did was pour." Dec laughed.
"What did you end up doing, besides each other?" Ben pulled up a chair on the opposite side of the bed and held Rem's other hand.
"We went to museums." Dec rolled his eyes dramatically.
"Lord forbid you get a little culture."
"It was fun. We went to the glass museum in Sandwich. After we took the tour, Rem decided he wanted to be a glass blower. I told him he should just stick to being a Declan blower."
Ben laughed. "All class, man."
Dec laughed along with Ben. "Rem was determined to learn how to blow glass, so he signed up for a class at the local community college. The class ran two nights a week for six weeks. Rem was so proud of himself, even though he came home with
scrapes and burns. He kept telling me about this final project he was working on and how it was going to be a masterpiece."
"Was it a masterpiece?"
Dec snorted. "The last night of the class you could invite friends or family to come to the grand unveiling. I was so excited to see his work, since it was all Rem had talked about for weeks. Each of the student projects were hidden under a drop cloth. You should have seen some of the things the students made. Bowls and vases. One girl made Christmas balls for the tree. Really amazing work. Then it was Rem's turn. He said that he'd put his whole heart into this design and that it was for the love of his life. I'd never been so nervous in my life waiting for him to lift up the cloth that covered it."
"Did you fall in love with it?"
Dec burst out laughing, shaking his head no. "It was this mangled looking heap of glass. There were threads of colors running through it, but it didn't look like anything recognizable."
Ben laughed along with him.
"He was so damn proud of it though. You should have seen him beaming from ear to ear. When I got closer to it, I could see the beauty in it. I loved it because Rem made it for me. I told him I'd treasure it until my dying day."
"That's true love."
Dec nodded. "Later that night. He told me that his masterpiece was shit, but that he loved me so much more for loving his work."
"That's so Rem." Ben squeezed his hand. "You gotta wake up, buddy. I'm thinking of taking a ceramics class that I think you'd love."
Dec rolled his eyes. "Hell, Rem, if you wake up, I'll take it with you." Please God, let him wake up. Let him be able to take that gaudy ceramics class.
20
Dec had been true to his word. He'd only left that blue plastic chair to go to the men's room.
After school had let out, Nash and Knox had come to visit, bringing Declan an order of pasta from Italianos. He hadn't been interested in eating, but Ben had sat next to him and made sure he’d eaten at least half of it.
Spaghetti and meatballs was his favorite meal, but with Rem lying in a hospital bed on a respirator in a medically induced coma, the food had no taste. Dec ate it just to fuel his body.