by David Bell
“Thanks for calling back,” Derrick said. “I was hoping we could talk about Sierra.”
“She’s doing just fine, if you’re calling to ask how she is.”
“I talked to Nora about that already,” Derrick said. “I know you two would take good care of her, but we have to make some decisions about her. About where she’s going.”
Derrick possessed a coldness. That was the only way Jason could think of it. Coldness. He always seemed to be holding something back and maintaining a distance from the people he interacted with. In that sense, he seemed like a good complement to Hayden, who laid everything bare for the world to see. But his manner made Jason uneasy as they talked about Sierra. Jason didn’t want his niece’s future to seem like a business transaction, something handled based on practicality and good sense.
“We don’t mind having her here,” Jason said. “She has schoolwork to do, and she’s been trying to do some of that. We have an extra room for her.”
“I know that. And I appreciate it. But it seems like maybe she should be with her father at a time like this. There’s so much uncertainty about Hayden. There always has been, I guess, but now . . . Well, the police called and filled me in. They told me about the car. And the blood. I even had to prove my whereabouts to them. I guess if something happens to a wife, even an ex-wife, they look at the husband. I think they’re backing off of me, at least for now.”
“You know Hayden’s all cleaned up,” Jason said. “At least she was when she came to our house the other night. It seemed real, Derrick. But then—”
“Someone saw her with Jesse Dean.”
“Yes. Are you in touch with him at all?”
“Jesse Dean and I aren’t friends anymore. He’s . . . he’s always been a little too wild for me.”
“Do you know why Hayden would be with him? She came here saying that she needed to make amends for something as part of her twelve-step program. Is there something that has to do with Jesse Dean that she would need to make amends for? Sierra says her mom was talking to Jesse Dean on the phone before she came here.”
“Well, you know Hayden. If there’s something bothering her, she’s not just going to let it go. She’s going to keep gnawing at it until everybody has to deal with it. She and Jesse Dean were friends of course. Sometimes they even spent time together without me. When I was at work and things like that, they’d hang out. I don’t even want to think of what could have happened between the two of them.”
“Are you saying there might have been something between them? Something sexual?”
“I’m not going to sit here and act like I don’t know who Hayden was back then. So there’s nothing she could do that would surprise me.”
“Since you brought that up . . . do you know if there was ever anything between Hayden and Logan Shaw?”
There was a long pause. Jason feared he may have offended Derrick by bringing up something potentially unpleasant from the past. Maybe he was okay with speculating about Hayden and his good friend Jesse Dean. But Hayden and a guy like Logan? A rich guy? Was that too much?
“Derrick?” Jason thought he heard voices in the background, someone talking on Derrick’s end of the phone. “Hello?”
“That’s your friend, right?”
“Yes.”
“I don’t know. I never knew everything she did. I don’t know anything now.”
“You don’t sound too worried about Hayden’s safety. Are you? I mean, the blood in the trunk and the car just sitting up there on the Bluff with the keys in it. All of that.”
Derrick sighed. “Let me tell you something you probably don’t know. In fact, I’m sure you don’t know about it, because I never told you, and I’m sure Hayden didn’t either. She liked to act like she told everybody everything, but there were some things she wouldn’t spill. And there were things she wouldn’t tell you because she valued your opinion of her too much. She looked up to you. She always did.”
“I know.”
“One night when Sierra was about a year old. Maybe a little more. She was able to crawl by then and was even pulling herself up by the furniture and then falling down again. I came home from work. Do you know what Hayden was doing?”
“I don’t know. Drinking, I guess.”
“She was drinking all right. But she wasn’t doing it in the house. She was gone. She went out drinking and left Sierra home alone. A one-year-old.”
Jason felt heartsick hearing the story. He felt like someone had thumped him in the center of his chest. If Sierra seemed vulnerable as a teenager, then he couldn’t bear to imagine her as a neglected child. . . .
“Did she come right back?” Jason asked.
“Two days,” Derrick said. “Two days of partying. She told me she made sure she left close to the time I was getting home so the baby wouldn’t be alone for very long. Can you believe that?”
Jason didn’t try to answer right away, but he felt compelled to mount some defense of his sister, who had so frequently been indefensible. “She’s changed, Derrick,” he said. “I’d like to believe that.”
He wanted to believe it. But he wasn’t sure he could. How did he know that Hayden was a different person after all the broken promises? What made him think she meant it this time?
“I’m telling you this story not because I want to trash Hayden to her brother. I wouldn’t do that. And I wouldn’t trash her to Sierra either. She and I don’t play those games.”
“Then why are you telling me this?” Jason asked, although he could have guessed at the answer that came.
“She’s left her child behind before,” he said. “More than once.”
“And you think this is just another one of those broken promises?”
“I haven’t been the best father either. I know I haven’t seen the girl in a while. You see, I want to come there and be with her and take her in. I want to play a more active role in things, the way a father should.”
“Sure,” Jason said.
“You don’t sound like you believe me. You’re probably lumping me in with Hayden, and that’s okay.”
“Derrick—”
“But I’m trying to get some things resolved in my life. Things have to be set up a little better. I’m starting a new job. I’m moving into a new place. It’s tough starting over at our age, you know?”
“I know.”
“Right. You’ve been laid off and had to move out of New York. You get it. Look, I’m hoping I’ll have some things taken care of soon, and then . . . then things will just make more sense. I’m hoping Hayden does come back. I hope she sees her way through and puts Sierra first again.”
“Are you supporting Sierra?” Jason asked.
“I am. Lately. Not that it’s any of your business.”
“What if Hayden doesn’t come back?” Jason asked. “What if . . . You know awful things happen to people, especially up on that bluff. I’m sure you know they found a body up there when they were looking for Hayden. A skeleton. What if something similar happened to Hayden? What if her body is somewhere?”
Again, Derrick’s end of the conversation seemed to have stopped. Jason listened for a moment and heard the sound of laughing, faint and distant, from downstairs. Sierra and Nora and their silly movie. He looked at the phone and saw the call was still active.
“I need to know . . . has Sierra said anything else about Hayden?” Derrick asked. “Anything besides hearing her talk to Jesse Dean?”
“I think she’s as in the dark as we all are,” Jason said.
“Good,” Derrick said. “That’s good. She doesn’t need to be mixed up in this stuff.”
“She’s not.”
“And you’re really sure that’s all she said?” Derrick asked.
“Yes. I’m sure. Are you sure? What exactly are we talking about here, Derrick?” Jason asked.
“Let’s just keep her out of it, okay? We can all agree on that.”
“Of course,” Jason said, but Derrick had already hung up.
He went downstairs where Nora and Sierra were watching the end of their movie. When he came into the room and stood next to the couch, Nora looked up at him.
“So, how’s it going?” she asked.
He knew that she wanted to know if Derrick was coming to get Sierra.
“I think everything seems fine,” he said. “Just fine.”
“Good,” Nora said. She turned her attention back to the movie.
Chapter Thirty
“Are you at work?”
Jason was. He’d been there all morning, and when his office phone rang shortly before lunch, he picked it up without even wondering who might be on the other end. He recognized the voice right away.
“Regan?”
A long pause. “Yes, it’s me.”
“Of course I’m at work. Is something wrong?”
“Have you heard the news?” she asked.
“No. Did something happen?” Jason’s heart dropped. What had he missed? “Is this about Hayden? Did they find her?”
“I wanted to try to catch you now. It’s already been on the radio. That’s where I heard it.”
“Heard what?”
“That body they found up on the Bluff. Jason, it’s Logan’s body. They identified it this morning.”
“Logan?”
Jason’s mind couldn’t catch up to the words he was hearing. Regan wasn’t making any sense. Logan? His body on the Bluff? It couldn’t be. Logan was gone. Long gone. But he wasn’t dead. He wasn’t a body. He wasn’t a bunch of bones scattered in the woods, left there to be found by a cadaver dog years and years later.
“I have to go, Jason. I have work, and it’s just too much right now.”
“Regan? I think this is a mistake. You must have misunderstood what they said.”
“It’s not a mistake, Jason. I have to go.”
She hung up.
* * *
Jason called Detective Olsen, who picked up after the first ring. Jason skipped the formalities and asked the question. “What is going on, Detective? I got a call from a high school friend.”
“Are you at home or work?” Olsen asked.
“Work.”
“I’ll meet you there in about ten minutes. I’m in that area.”
“My friend says this body or skeleton or whatever is Logan Shaw. Is it?”
“We should talk in person,” Olsen said. “I know things are coming out on the news already.”
“Is it Logan Shaw?” Jason asked.
There was a pause. Then Olsen said, “Yes, it is.”
* * *
Jason met Olsen in front of his office building. The detective pulled up in a dark blue sedan, a Chevy Impala, and when he stepped out of the car, he wore a suit and sunglasses. He came toward Jason as the breeze picked up, blowing his tie askew. Jason met Olsen halfway and guided the detective toward a picnic table that sat in the grass under a shade tree. People ate their lunches out there and took their cigarette breaks. It would be a quiet place to talk.
“Tell me about this,” Jason said as they sat. He felt hollow, like the husk of a person.
Jason positioned himself with his back against the table, and Olsen straddled the bench. “I wanted to see you so I could tell you in person about this,” Olsen said. “Obviously, that didn’t work out. But I’m sorry to report that the skeletal remains we found on Thompson Bluff are those of Logan Shaw. They were positively identified by the medical examiner’s office.”
“How?” Jason asked.
“How were they identified? We used dental records. You played a role in the whole thing. After you mentioned it to me, I looked into the case a little more. There isn’t much on it since no one really considered Mr. Shaw a missing person, not after the first few days. But I did find some information in our old case files. I located Mr. Shaw’s mother, and she gave me the right name. The dentist is retired but still has his records in storage. It was pretty easy from there.”
“But Logan can’t be dead,” Jason said. “He left town. He went out west. He sent letters to his parents.”
“I’m aware of all that,” Olsen said. “As far as the medical examiner can tell, that body’s been in the woods a long time. Maybe twenty-five years or so. Isn’t that how long ago you graduated from high school?”
“Twenty-seven,” Jason said.
“That’s what I thought. And that’s the last time anyone saw Mr. Shaw. It makes sense. He was on the Bluff that night, and he was never seen again.”
“It doesn’t make sense. The letters . . .”
“I haven’t seen these letters. I understand they’re in the possession of Mr. Shaw’s father, and his health isn’t that great. We’ll get up there and take a look at them when we can, but chances are those letters are a misunderstanding. Or an attempt by someone to cover something up.”
“You mean to say that someone killed Logan? Is that what you’re saying?”
“Do you know of anyone who would want to?” Olsen asked. “You and he were close friends, right? Wouldn’t you know the things that were going on in his life? Did anyone threaten him? Was he having a fight with anybody?”
Jason couldn’t answer. He tried to focus his mind. How long had he known this news? Fifteen minutes? It hadn’t sunk in. It couldn’t sink in.
But there was Olsen before him. So certain. So sure. They’d used dental records. What else did Jason need to know? And as he sat there, just a few feet away from the detective, he admitted to himself that it made sense in a way. Was it possible to believe that Logan left all those years ago and never made contact with anyone again? Jason assumed Logan would come back someday. When he and Nora moved back to town after Jason lost his job, he felt defeated. Wiped out. And his marriage needed serious attention. But when adding up the pluses and minuses of taking that step backward to Ednaville, Jason put the possibility of seeing Logan again into the plus category. If he lived here long enough, and Logan’s parents aged and died, wouldn’t he see his friend again then? At the very least, wouldn’t there be some occasion when he could see him again?
And, instead, he’d been lying in the woods all those years, his body decaying back to dust while the rest of the world went on with their lives.
It couldn’t be.
“Would you like to talk another time?” Olsen asked. “I can drive you home.”
“He was my best friend. For years.”
“I know.”
Above their heads birds chirped. People came and went from the office, leaving or returning from lunch in small packs. Young secretaries. Older executives. It all went on and on.
“How did nobody find his body all those years?” Jason asked.
“It was in a remote area. Off the beaten path a little. Unless you were looking for something, as we were when your sister’s car was found, you wouldn’t see it. We only found it because of the dogs. And the search for your sister.”
“Thanks, Hayden,” Jason said.
“What’s that?”
“Nothing. This wouldn’t have happened if it weren’t for Hayden showing up and getting into whatever clusterfuck she got herself into.” Jason shook his head. He recognized that his anger toward Hayden was misdirected as he said, “She can’t help but stir the pot wherever she goes. Disasters just seem to stream along behind her. I love her so much, but she really . . . sometimes she drives me to the brink.”
“Do you think your sister being missing has something to do with Mr. Shaw’s death?” Olsen asked.
“Do you?”
“I don’t know anything right now.”
“Neither do I.” Jason looked down at his shaking hands. He brought them together, folded them one into the other in an effort at ste
adiness. “I was thinking about Hayden and Logan, ever since you mentioned that body being found up there. I tried to make a link between the two of them.”
“And?”
“Nothing. Hayden was flirtatious with everyone. I don’t know if she and Logan ever did anything or not. If Hayden were here, you could ask her. . . .”
“I’d very much like to ask her that,” Olsen said.
Jason straightened up. Something clicked in his mind, something that seemed important. “How do you even know what killed him after all this time? I mean, how do you know he didn’t just trip and fall? Or have an aneurysm in the woods? There’d be nothing left to examine.”
“We know the cause of death,” Olsen said.
“What is it?”
“Bones can tell a story,” Olsen said. “Now, didn’t you and Mr. Shaw have some kind of altercation that night?”
“Yeah, we did.”
“What about?”
“A girl. We fought over a girl.”
“You fought? With fists or just with words?”
Olsen’s face and voice had taken on a slightly harder cast. To that point, the detective had seemed almost casual as they sat at the picnic table discussing the discovery of Jason’s best friend’s body. But Olsen suddenly seemed to be on the hunt for something, as though the entire conversation had been an elaborate warm-up for the questions he really wanted to ask.
“I talked about this with the police back then,” Jason said. “They treated me like a suspect.”
“I didn’t say suspect.”
“What are you doing to find Hayden?” Jason asked. “She’s still missing.”
“Have you heard anything from her?”
“No, I haven’t. But maybe if you found Jesse Dean Pratt, you could figure it out. Maybe you could figure it all out.”
“Have you seen him?” Olsen pointed at Jason’s neck. “It looks like someone grabbed hold of you.”
“I did see him. He’s mad that I told the police about him. In fact, he threatened me. He said if I involved the police anymore . . .”