He knew that?
She stared at him—at the anger in his gaze. What had she done to make him dislike her so much? And yet even as she watched she saw it transmute into something else. The magnetism that was so strong between them grew: desire. Need threaded with frustration and ran through her veins, excitement and longing rushed. As the room seemed to darken—there was only James.
The flash of light broke the spell. Just as she registered the clicking sound, James swore, short and crude, his lips barely moving. He stepped away immediately. Turned a final, fleeting, burningly cold glare at her as he exited. Liss blinked—forcing her focus away, suppressing the desire to follow him; instead she faced back to the party, lips twisting up automatically for the camera.
CHAPTER SIX
JAMES barely slept. The grumpy, headachy mood didn’t improve when he thought about the night before. He should be working—making those calls. He should be concentrating. Instead he was hit with hideous memories. He remembered clearly his mother’s beseeching tones.
‘You know I love your father very much,’ she’d said.
He’d started walking.
She’d called after him. ‘You know I love you…’
He’d started running then. Yeah, sure you do, Mother. Whose dictionary were you looking up love in? Family and loyalty clearly meant so much. Not.
He got out of bed and went to the gym. Still couldn’t stop thinking, sweating out old hurts, swamped with the threat of new ones. In his mind the past got all mixed up, the hurt, the anger of loss and betrayal. The humiliation of deception and discovery and being the last in the world to know.
His mother had done it. Jenny had done it. Liss was of the same ilk—needy for attention. One man would never be enough. He told himself and told himself—warning. And yet he couldn’t keep away. The drive to be physically near her was too strong. And even though he had spoken the truth last night, he felt guilty.
She opened the door, clearly surprised to see him. She looked him up and down a couple of times. Made him feel so self-conscious he put his hand to his chin. The roughened skin reminded him that he hadn’t shaved before showering.
‘Did you want a ride to Atlanta House today?’ It was kind of an apology. But most of him expected her to say no, sure she only did her ‘charity bit’ on the days when she had nothing better to do, or when there was bound to be an audience.
Her expression darkened. ‘Yes, but—’
‘I’ll take you.’
‘I can manage.’
‘I’ll take you.’ He overrode her—pleased because she was going, pleased with himself because he’d got to her place just in time. ‘Anything to carry this week?’
She jerked her head towards the black case by the door. He stepped forward, lifted his brows at the size of it.
‘What’s in that?’ he asked, hefting the case from one hand to the other so he could hold the door.
‘Just girl stuff.’ She wouldn’t look at him.
He wanted her to smile. ‘Like what? Movies? Popcorn?’
‘Pedicures actually.’
He paused. She looked at him then and he saw the flicker of amusement.
‘When they get big, sometimes the girls can’t reach their toes any more.’
It wasn’t something he’d ever thought about before and he wasn’t sure he wanted to again. ‘So you’re going to do it for them?’ The picture of Liss on her knees polishing someone else’s toenails seemed so unlikely he was about to laugh. Until he saw her defensively earnest expression.
‘I might not be so good at organising paper files, James, but I’m pretty handy with a nail file.’
Reluctantly he acknowledged the admiration filling him. ‘I never knew nail files were so heavy.’
The giggle suddenly bubbled out of her. It was such a nice sound and it shattered the heaviness between them.
‘That would be the foot spa.’ She giggled some more. ‘Or maybe the jar of salts.’
‘Foot spa?’
Her giggle became full-blown laughter and he found his slid easily from him too. She smiled at him then—just as he’d wanted her to. And all the bad feeling of the night disappeared.
‘It is a bit ridiculous.’ She looked rueful.
‘No.’ He shook his head at her, grinning widely. ‘It’s nice. It’s a nice thing to do. My mother does a lot of charity work but I don’t think she’s ever clipped someone’s toenails for them.’
‘No? She’s obviously not supporting the right ones.’ Liss twinkled. ‘What does she support?’
James shrugged, already regretting thinking of her, mentioning her. ‘Whichever is flavour of the day.’ The heaviness returned like a bad hangover.
Liss was looking expectant, waiting for more—all the way down in the lift.
‘She’s on a million committees.’ He eventually broadened—briefly. But he couldn’t hide the sarcastic undertone. ‘She keeps busy. She likes to be seen to be active on that circuit.’ Outward appearances were everything after all.
Liss kept pace with him to the car, pressed him right on the button. ‘You’re not close?’
He really regretted mentioning her. ‘Not really.’
Not at all. It might have all fallen apart that day in his last year of school, when he’d come home early on a study break. His mother had come downstairs in a hurry. And then that guy had appeared—walking slowly, and so damn arrogantly down the stairs. She’d said he was there to talk about finances for one of her charities. And that needed to happen upstairs where the bedrooms were? What did they think he was, stupid?
He was conscious of Liss’s intense scrutiny as he loaded her bag into the boot of the car. Finally he felt compelled to fill the silence she was making so obvious. So he shrugged again. ‘You know. Mothers.’
He started the car. Hoped this bit of the conversation was over.
‘No.’ Liss shook her head. ‘I wasn’t close to either of my parents. We had a succession of nannies and then it was boarding school.’
James glanced at her, interest piqued. That must have been weird. Up until he’d discovered his mum’s affair, life had been pretty sweet in his home, whereas Liss had always had it crazy. ‘What about your sister?’
Her smile was soft. ‘We’re close. Different, but close. Kitty might be older but she’s more vulnerable—she always has her nose in a book and her head in the clouds.’
Clearly Liss thought she was the more streetwise. James grinned. ‘So you kept an eye out for her, huh?’
‘Of course.’
So who kept an eye out for Liss, then? ‘What about your brothers?’
‘I’m not that close to them either.’
‘Why is that?’ Thinking about it he’d never heard Alex say much about his youngest sister. All he’d said was that she was unmanageable and he needed her off the island while the succession was sorted out. It struck James that Liss wasn’t really that unmanageable at all. And as to the question as to who was more vulnerable—James thought maybe he should reserve judgment.
‘Just different I guess.’ She shrugged. ‘I have some really great friends though.’
Did she? Really?
‘What about your dad?’ Liss turned the spotlight back on him. ‘Are you close to him?’
James pressed a little harder on the accelerator. His mother had put a barrier between him and his father. In some ways he found that even more unforgivable. To tell, or not to tell? He’d been burdened with that dilemma for too long—until the day he’d found out he was just as stupid as his dad.
‘More so in recent years.’ Now he had more in common with his dad than he’d ever wanted. Learnt the hard way not to be so scathing of his father’s blindness, and had developed some empathy.
He had to pull over then to let her out. He hoisted the case out of the boot and set it down for her. ‘Have fun with all those toes.’
She flicked her fingers and he watched her go in. Her hair swung side to side in the simple ponytail as she wheeled
her case behind her. If she was wearing make-up he couldn’t tell. But, hell, she was beautiful.
He didn’t go to work. He sat at a café, had three coffees and brooded, staring out the windows at the passers-by. He carefully avoided all the glossy mags stacked at the end of the counter. Having the moment his lover betrayed him with another man caught on film and printed in every magazine there was had put him off them. It wasn’t an experience he wanted to repeat. Besides, he didn’t want to see the all-glam Princess Elissa in them today; he’d rather see her as she was at this moment—fresh and relaxed.
When he pulled up at the house a couple of hours later they were all sitting on the veranda outside, legs outstretched—drying toenails presumably. He smothered the chuckle. It was quite a sight.
‘Liss, your boyfriend-bodyguard-boss is here.’
Liss rolled her eyes. ‘Couple of weeks this time, girls.’ And smiled away the chorus of disappointment.
The drive home was quick, she quietly chatted, told him a little about a couple of the girls. It wasn’t until they were in the lift that he looked down and noticed her feet. Every toe was painted a different colour—an array of shimmer, gloss and matte.
‘Like the rainbow look.’ He winked.
She laughed. ‘They wanted to see what they were like on so they could choose.’
He dropped to his knees. ‘I like that one best.’ He tweaked the crimson-tipped fourth toe on her left foot. Hell, even her toes were beautiful.
‘Twist of Temptation. Good choice,’ she said lightly and moved her foot away.
The lift doors opened as he stood, and then he noticed the pink splotches on her chest, saw the way her breathing had quickened. He moved, made the doors stay open by standing between them.
‘Not going to reciprocate the coffee this week?’ As if he needed more. He already had the shakes, or maybe that was just from the way she was wearing those jeans and the way she was so obviously affected.
‘I…um…’
The pink tinges over her skin darkened and he fought hard to quell the urge to reach out and smooth across it, to trace down the path beneath the tee shirt and find out what other parts of her body were reddened. He badly wanted to touch, to taste, to…
‘That’s OK. You’re right. It’s not a good idea. Enjoy the rest of your weekend.’ He spoke quickly, stepped back into the lift and jabbed at the ‘close doors’ button with a tightly clenched fist, before he did something he was sure to regret.
Liss’s sense of anticipation as she got to work on Monday was at a ridiculous level. She couldn’t wait to get on with the rest of the party plans and she hardly dared admit to herself how much she was looking forward to seeing James again. The drive to and from Atlanta House on Saturday had been such an eye-opener. Seeing him laugh like that, seeing him in those jeans, unshaven, relaxed—no distance, no disapproval, only warmth in those eyes. Sure, he’d got touchy when she’d asked about his parents, but for once that had only made him seem more human.
It had almost wiped out the hurt from his words of the night before. It almost made her wonder whether, if it weren’t for the raging lust she felt for him, he’d make a great friend. Someone to laugh with, someone to listen to, someone to lean on. But the attraction between them meant a pure friendship was impossible. And it was clear he as much as she was working hard not to act on that attraction. She wondered why. And most of all, she wondered how long they could keep up the fight.
She’d only been at her desk for a few minutes before Katie came up to drop the papers in. She gave Liss a coy look. ‘You and James looked like you were enjoying that art gallery do the other night.’
‘You were there?’
Katie’s laugh was more of a snort. ‘Hardly.’
‘Oh—’
‘The picture in the paper—haven’t you seen it?’
Liss shook her head, heart heading south. ‘I don’t tend to look.’
‘You should—you’re always in them, looking gorgeous.’ The receptionist smiled again, but Liss worried that it didn’t quite reach her eyes. ‘The two of you looked pretty intense.’
She’d look at it in a moment—in private. She said nothing, already certain Katie’s mind was going in directions Liss didn’t want.
‘How’s the party planning going?’ Katie asked. ‘Lucky you getting to do that.’
It was a no-brainer to see where she was driving—just as Liss had expected. Her defences rose immediately. Great, Katie, and probably the rest of the staff, thought she’d got the fun job by having a fling with the boss. An open denial would be futile. Katie and the others would believe what they wanted to—Liss knew the truth was irrelevant. When it came to reputation versus reality, people always preferred the juicier option.
‘I guess he asked me to do it because I know Aristo so well.’
‘Yeah.’ Katie’s smile was sharp and her eyes full of scepticism. ‘I guess.’
The second she’d gone, Liss rifled through the papers. The photo was of their profiles. She and James face to face. Full colour and, as Katie had said, intense. Eyes nowhere but on each other.
This was no way to keep speculation at bay and it made her even more determined to keep her distance. But she felt torn because, despite the words of Friday night, on Saturday they’d laughed together. Really laughed. And it had been so nice she wanted more. But already there was talk and she would not have all her hard work jeopardised. She wanted to succeed—on her own and have that achievement recognised. She was going to have to fight the attraction harder.
He still hadn’t appeared by lunchtime. Mid-afternoon she phoned down to Katie. ‘Do you know where James is?’
‘In Melbourne,’ came the slightly tart reply. ‘Didn’t you know?’
‘No.’ Liss hoped that her lack of knowledge of his trip might score her some points in the credibility stakes. Just so long as the sharp disappointment she’d felt hadn’t registered in her voice. And she didn’t want to ask when he was due back for fear Katie would misconstrue the interest.
The next few days sped in a flurry of organisation and mild panic. She fired an email to Cassie via Sebastian, giving her travel details. Cassie wasn’t coming to the ball—with all the hoopla surrounding Sebastian’s abdication the last thing they wanted was to be out at the mercy of the gossipy Aristan socialites. None of the others were going either—there was too much going on, with Alex on the hunt for the diamond and the succession so uncertain. Liss would be the only royal present. Liss understood why, but she would have loved to have had a friendly face there. And it would have been great to have someone see her success. But it wasn’t to be. Hopefully she’d have time to meet up with Cassie in the days after.
So on she worked, finalising details, checking, double-checking that everything she’d planned would result in perfection. And as every day passed the anticipation, the adrenalin, built in her body—more and more, until finally she felt unable to sleep, unable to eat. She missed him. Every day she came into work hoping he’d be there, fighting the disappointment when he wasn’t. Hope then built again—that he might appear during the day. She was turning into a scatterbrained mess and she had to find some method of release. Finally she fell back on her all-time favourite way of letting off steam—she’d go dancing.
After seeing the photo in the paper of the two of them at the art gallery, James delayed his return to Sydney until the afternoon before they were scheduled to fly to Aristo. He could no longer trust himself not to give into temptation and he didn’t want to risk being recorded by some paparazzi. Getting snapped with her a second time would lead to serious speculation in the tabloids—they’d blow it way out of proportion. As it was he knew there’d be some questioning looks in his office. He told himself he could cope with that, but only on his terms—and privacy was one of them. The humiliation of Jenny’s so very public betrayal had been enough. If they were to deal with this, they would, but no one would know. And until then, physical distance was the only answer.
Landing back in Sydney and getting to the office late, he found the staff had left for the day. But he knew he couldn’t go another night without seeing her. He headed out to the usual nightspots—eventually finding her down on the dance floor of one of them.
He couldn’t stop going nearer to her, watching her over the balcony area above. As she swayed to the relentless rhythm of the bass he tried to control his body’s basic reaction. His jaw ached from clenching his teeth so hard. All he could think about was that kiss—where he’d been singed and his hands still hurt from not holding her. He badly wanted a repeat. He’d known it would be good. He hadn’t known it would go ballistic. And he refused to believe it had been ‘just’a kiss for her too. The way she looked at him, the awareness in her body, the way she flushed if he got too close—she was totally strung out.
Good. Because so was he.
He was sick of this heavy sense of foreboding. Desire was driving him now—his arms were empty and aching. The urge to haul her close was overwhelming and he knew he couldn’t fight it any more.
He glanced around the room. Saw many others watching her too. She was dancing with a group of girls—all of them attractive, but it was Liss that the crowd was watching, the one who many were wanting.
He knew what he was getting himself into. He wouldn’t invest any emotion. It would be purely physical. It wouldn’t take much to make the flame burn out. A fast and furious glow and it would be over.
It was different from Jenny because this time he had his eyes wide open. He already knew not to trust Liss. She wasn’t about to be hurt—she’d find some other beau before James would have the chance to blink. He gritted his teeth harder at the wave of rage that rose with that thought. Damn it, he had to control that. And he decided the only way was to give her an experience she’d never forget—make sure it was so damn good she’d be ruined for the next guy. Because there would be a next guy. It was only a matter of time. For women like Liss, one lover would never be enough.
Ruthless Boss, Royal Mistress Page 6