by Ann Aguirre
His apartment was different than I expected; probably I could credit his mother for the décor. The place was a homey jumble of plaids and stripes that harmonized because of the colors. White walls, of course—it was a rental—but everything else had red and yellow running through the pattern. Overstuffed furniture with throw pillows added real warmth. The place had one bedroom, living and dining combo room, kitchen, and bath. Not much to see, but it was cute and clean. I should’ve guessed as much from his uncluttered desk at work.
Jesse disappeared into the bedroom. Once I set my bag down, Butch hopped out and went around sniffing. If there was anything out of the ordinary here, he’d find it. The little dog had an uncanny ability to scent supernatural skullduggery.
I put my flowered bag down and dropped onto the couch. Likely I’d be sleeping here, so good thing the fabric felt soft and smooth beneath my fingertips. Leaning my head back, I closed my eyes. If it wasn’t for the fact that if something went wrong, Jesse could have Laredo SWAT here in a few minutes, I wouldn’t be here. Chuch and Eva would not be caught in the cross fire this time.
A few minutes later, Butch pawed at my leg. I bent down and picked him up. He snuggled into my lap with complete confidence, which told me the place was secure for now. It drove me nuts worrying about Montoya’s resources, whether he knew about Chuch and Eva, if Shannon was safe with them. I fought the urge to call, like an overprotective parent, and toyed with the charm around my neck instead.
When Jesse emerged a bit later, his hair was damp. He must’ve taken a shower to cool off. I almost smiled at that. He propped himself against the wall just inside the living room.
“Is it always going to be like this with you?”
“What?” But I knew what he meant.
“Is it always going to come down to a choice between upholding the law and protecting you?”
“I don’t know,” I said quietly. “But it might. I’m not Heather.” I named a pyro ex of his who had gone to prison for arson. “But I’m not the girl your mother always wanted you to bring home either.”
He exhaled in an unsteady rush. “There’s something I never told you about Heather.”
“And that is?”
“I’m the one who put her away.”
Ah, damn. I understood his raw reaction to my working outside the law. He’d been forced to make this choice before. Any other time, I might’ve made some joke about how bad girls proved irresistible to him. But his obvious torment made me feel tender and protective toward him. Sure, he had a white-knight complex a mile wide; he always wanted to save the damsel in distress, but I’d discovered I preferred slaying my own dragons. If he couldn’t accept that, then our relationship would be stillborn, even if he offered the best chance at a normal life.
“Look, in the usual course, don’t worry about me breaking the law. I wouldn’t have chosen Escobar as my partner, but I don’t want to die either.” I sat forward, elbows on my knees. “That’s the one thing you need to know about me. I’m a survivor, and I’ll do whatever it takes.”
In fact, it was worse than he knew. If I died, I went straight to hell, because I had a demon debt weighing on my soul. Back in Kilmer, I’d been fatally stabbed, and the demon saved my life by using the murderer’s knife to plug the wound. Oh, I could’ve objected, but if I had, I would’ve expired on the spot. If I failed to satisfy the compact, both my life and soul were forfeit. Nervously, my fingers went to the metal in my side. Not repaying Maury before eternity punched my card . . . well. It didn’t bear consideration. I’d gotten a glimpse of the place when Caim crawled back home, and I had no interest in making a personal visit. So I had to stay alive, no matter what it took, until Maury called his marker due.
The alliance with Escobar also carried a heavenly blessing, but I wouldn’t tell Jesse that. Sometimes I found it hard to credit, as if those days with Kel had been a vivid dream.
“I can’t condemn you for that. It makes you strong, and I admire that about you.” Jesse pushed away from the wall then and sauntered toward me with deceptively lazy strides. “You’re wrong about one thing, though.”
“What’s that?”
“My mama wants me with somebody who makes me happy. That’s all.”
“And I mostly make you mad.”
His dark eyes crinkled with a smile. “Yeah, you do. But only because I care.”
“You sure you don’t see me as some fixer-upper project?”
Jesse sat down beside me. “Not anymore. At first, sure, because that’s the way I’m wired, but there’s no changing you. You’re stubborn as hell, and I either love you like you are, or I don’t.”
His easy use of that word tightened my stomach. I didn’t know if I wanted to know, if I was ready to hear it. I damn sure didn’t know how I felt. Instead of time clearing up my confusion, now I had more, because I secretly wanted something I could never have, and if that wasn’t self-destructive behavior, then I’d never encountered it.
I heard myself say, “And?”
He threaded his hands into my hair, delicate as fireflies at dusk, and leaned his brow against mine. “I do. I’m not sure I even knew myself before last week, but when you went quiet on me, I don’t know when I ever felt so grim. Thinking I’d never see you . . .” Jesse trailed off and shook his head, dusting a kiss against my temple. “I don’t want that feeling again.”
Sweet, powerful emotions stirred in response to his declaration. I couldn’t tell him I loved him. Not yet. So I did the next-best thing, and for me, it constituted a hell of a leap. “You know how you’ve been saying you want me to meet your family?”
“Yeah.”
“Think maybe your mom could set an extra place some night this week?”
He wrapped his arms around me. “She’d love to. For about the last month or so, she’s been pestering me about the secret girl I’m seeing. I didn’t have the heart to tell her it was virtual dating. I don’t think she’d understand.”
Despite my nerves, I smiled. “Most people wouldn’t.”
Hell, I didn’t myself. I wasn’t sure if this was right; I knew only that if I claimed to want a normal life, opening myself up to Jesse made the most sense of anything I’d ever done. Kel couldn’t give me that. Neither could Chance, even if he’d wanted to, and clearly he didn’t. He talked a good game, but when I demanded a good-faith payment, he disappeared. So this was a logical step, a commitment to my future. With Jesse’s empathy blind to me, it might be the beginning of something special.
“So that’s it?” he asked. “You’re my girl?”
I told myself he was the only one who cared enough to stay, and I nodded. “I am.”
“I have a couple of ladies to let down easy, then.” He wore a sheepish look.
If anything, I admired his honesty. I didn’t begrudge him a good time while we were doing the long-distance thing, but if we intended to take a real run at this, we had to go all the way with promises and monogamy. I was ready.
Butch stirred between us. At first I thought it was Jesse’s proximity, but he hopped down with a little whine. He trotted toward the door and then glanced back at us with an imploring, bug-eyed look. With any other dog, I’d guess he needed to pee again.
With Butch, it meant something bad was on the way up. No question. God, I wished I knew how to fight, but this was exactly why I hadn’t wanted to stay long at Chuch and Eva’s place. Please don’t let anything happen to them. Please, please, please, please. I saw Eva’s face, glowing when she talked about the baby, and Chuch’s complete pride and adoration.
And then, of course, there was Shannon. I loved her like a little sister, and we had plans together. As soon as this was all over, we were going to open a new shop together. Spooky Vintage. The name had resonance. I’d ask Shan if she liked it, if I lived.
Jesse summed up the situation in a glance; he knew to take the dog seriously too. “Behind the couch,” he growled at me, and then spun—he went toward the bedroom at a dead run. When he came back, he
held a cocked gun; he took a tactical position beside the door.
From my place crouched behind the sofa, I heard footsteps. Butch must’ve detected them as soon as they came into the foyer downstairs. Those oversize ears of his worked like satellite dishes. Butch trotted up beside me, but he had sense enough not to make any noise. I pulled him into my arms and curled my body over the top of him.
Belatedly it occurred to me that Jesse was one human being. He might be well trained, and he might be a cop in good shape, but at base, he was an empath. He couldn’t survive multiple stab wounds like Kel. He couldn’t live through a demon shoving a claw through his chest. Oh, Christ, what have I done? But it was too late for self-recrimination.
Montoya’s men burst into the apartment and filled the air with hot lead.
Mundane Mayhem
I didn’t see how it all went down, but I heard the gunplay and cries of pain. Butch hid his face in my arms; I made myself remain still and quiet and until Jesse said, “You can come out now.”
There were three. Two had been shot and the other one lay cuffed on the ground. I didn’t recognize them, but that meant nothing. Montoya had a practically never-ending supply of foot soldiers.
“You all right?”
“Yeah.”
But he kept a hand against his side. If that meant what I thought it did, this was the second time he’d been shot defending me. As I watched, a slow trickle of blood bubbled through his fingertips. I ran toward him and helped him to a chair. Somehow he managed to keep his gun trained on the injured shooter.
“Backup will be here any minute, along with the paramedics.” Jesse waved me away when I offered to get bandages.
“It don’t matter. He’ll just keep sending men until the puta is dead.” The handcuffed killer glared at me. “In fact, we got a team heading for another location as we speak. Choke on that, bitch.”
Shit. Oh, shit. He knew about Chuch and Eva. With shaking hands, I got out my cell phone and hit my speed dial. Pick up, pick up, pick up.
“What’s up, prima?” I had never been so happy to hear the mechanic’s voice.
“Get out now,” I told him, nearly frantic. “Montoya’s sending a squad over to your place. Do you have anywhere you can go?”
“Well, sure, but—”
“No but. Go. Go now.”
“Hang on a sec.” I heard him call out: “Eva, pack a bag.” And then: “Okay, we’re on it. Thanks for the warning.” He paused. “Oh, shit. I gotta go. They’re here.”
And the phone went dead, but not before I heard gunshots. “Jesse, can you report a crime faster than nine-one-one?”
His color wasn’t good, and his hand shook as he got out his phone. “Yeah. Chuch’s place?” At my nod, he called a patrolman he knew. He summarized the situation in pained gasps, then added, “You’ll need more than one car. Get there fast.”
The guy on the floor laughed. Shortly thereafter the paramedics arrived and took care of the two injured shooters. By the damage, it was obvious who had done what, so once they stabilized, they’d be sent to the station for processing. Other cops arrived within a few seconds, and my skin started to crawl.
They all snapped alert when a tall, gray-haired man stepped into the apartment. “Saldana, you all right?”
“I’m fine, Lieutenant. Surprised to see you.”
His boss smiled. “I was in the neighborhood, felt like stopping by. You want to tell me what happened?”
“I suspect this was a reprisal related to the death of Nathan Moon and the destruction of a key human-trafficking facility belonging to the Montoya cartel.”
So that was how he spun it. Well, it fit the facts, more or less. He just wasn’t the intended target. But I had my answer, didn’t I? Even with a bullet in his side, Jesse Saldana chose to protect me, even if it meant lying to his boss.
“Are you telling me the cartel’s put a price on your head, son?”
Jesse looked his boss square in the eye and lied. “Yes, sir.”
“Then after you leave the hospital, you’re heading for a safe house.”
Alarm flashed in his dark brown eyes. I knew exactly what he was thinking—that if he got locked up for his own protection, I’d be on my own. “That won’t be necessary. I can handle this.”
“The hell you can. They shot up your apartment, and it was damn lucky they didn’t catch you sleeping. No, we’ll take it from here. Sooner or later, one of Montoya’s men will roll, tell us when he’s gonna be in the country next, and then we’ll have him.”
I didn’t think that was likely, but it was also better I didn’t draw attention to myself. As the paramedics helped Jesse from the couch onto the gurney, the lieutenant walking alongside, Jesse cast a desperate look over his shoulder. I smiled at him, telling him wordlessly that it was okay. Since he belonged to a brotherhood, this development didn’t surprise me.
A cop came over to take my statement. I stuck with Jesse’s story, since it made sense. No, I hadn’t seen anything. I was hiding behind the couch the whole time—and how that rankled. Demons I could deal with, but I could do nothing about men with guns. I so needed to learn how to use a weapon.
“We’re all set here,” the cop said at last. “If we need anything else, we’ll call you.”
I’d given him my cell number, since I didn’t have a physical address. “Will it be okay if I take Jesse’s Forester to see how he’s doing? I don’t have my car here.” Or anywhere—I didn’t own one. “What hospital did they take him to?”
“Let me find out.” He got on the phone and a minute later he said, “Doctors Hospital. Need the address?”
“Please.”
Silently, I chafed with the need to find out what had happened at Chuch’s place as well, but I scrawled the address with a murmur of thanks. I snagged Jesse’s keys from the hook beside the door. A crime-scene crew was setting up their gear as I left. Blood spattered the place and bullet holes dotted the wall, testifying to the fact that the bad guys had come in with guns blazing.
If not for Butch, they might’ve caught us on the couch, as we’d been moments before. Easy pickings. Jesse had time to get his weapon and take a strategic position, thanks to the dog’s early warning. I rubbed his head and he nuzzled my hand. Butch seemed just as upset about Jesse and maybe even worried about Chuch, Eva, and Shannon. There was no telling how much he knew or understood. Sometimes I had the feeling it might surprise me.
With lead in my stomach, I punched the address into the GPS. Though I wasn’t supposed to drive and dial, I called Chuch’s cell. No answer—it went straight to voice mail. I fought down the fear. If anything happened to them, it’d be my fault. Escobar had claimed he would protect me, but I didn’t see much evidence of it, apart from the amulet, which offered no aid against mundane attack.
And then I remembered what he’d said: It will drive Montoya mad when his sorcerer fails . . . and fails and fails. He’ll contact you, if I know him at all. I really was bait. Not once or when I removed the amulet. Escobar had fully expected this, so in a way, he was still testing me. If I survived long enough to drive Montoya over the edge, he’d use me—if not, no big loss. I shouldn’t be surprised; Escobar was the coldest son of a bitch I’d ever met.
It didn’t take long to reach the hospital, a blocky gold building designed in modern style. I parked, ran through the parking lot and into the lobby. At the information desk, I asked, “Do you know where they took Jesse Saldana?”
“Are you family?”
“No.”
“Then I’m afraid I can’t give you any information.”
I set my jaw. “I was with him when he was shot. If you don’t tell me what I want to know, I’ll create the granddaddy of all scenes. Want to find out how loud I scream?”
“Girlfriend, then. That’s close enough.” Her worried smile said she thought I might start yelling anyway. “Ah, yes. He’s being prepped for surgery.”
That couldn’t be as ominous as it sounded. I went up to the waiting room
nonetheless and tried Chuch again. He picked up this time.
“Is everyone okay?”
“They didn’t stay.” He sounded weird, subdued. “Just fired a few warning shots. I got the fire department out here now.”
Fire department—
“Oh, no,” I breathed.
“I gotta go. Eva’s crying.” The stark simplicity of his grief hit me like a fist.
They’d burned his house down. A Molotov cocktail would do the job. I could see the scene all too clearly, and it filled me with white-hot rage: everything they’d achieved in their lives, gone, and all the work on the nursery, destroyed.
I could handle being hunted. In one form or another, I was used to it, but when they targeted women and unborn babies, they went too far. I was staring at my hands, trying to figure out my next move, when someone cleared his throat.
Glancing up, I saw Jesse’s lieutenant standing before me. “No organ damage but they have to go in, remove the bullet, and do a little repair work.” He sat down beside me. “I’m his boss, Lieutenant Glencannon. Try not to worry about him.”
I kept my hands laced in my lap, hiding the scars and brands. People always viewed my palms as evidence that there was something wrong with me. And there was, just not in the way they thought.
“Thanks.” I didn’t know what he wanted, but when cops paid attention to me, apart from Jesse, it seldom ended well.
“So you’re the girlfriend?” he asked in a musing tone.
“I guess.” The relationship was too new for me to feel comfortable discussing it with his superior. God, we’d barely agreed to try when Jesse wound up taking a bullet for me. Shit, if I’d ever doubted it, I was poison. Maybe I should aim myself at Kel, because he could survive me.
“You haven’t visited him at the station . . . and he doesn’t have any pictures of you in his office.”