“To repay my faith in him, he waited a few weeks, got drunk and drove into a car driven by a seventeen-year-old girl. She died at the scene. He lived.”
He was still angry. It hit him full force, the way it always hit him. Every time he thought about that girl losing her life, when he thought about the Johnsons not making it home in time to tell their son goodbye, and when he thought about his dad dying without him, it hurt. It made him want to go track that drunk driver down. It made him think about everything he wished he would have said to his dad—the good things, not the negative.
“Have you talked to her parents?”
That was the last thing he expected Penelope to ask. He swung his gaze in her direction, but he didn’t trust this road at night, not enough to give her a long look.
“You’re kidding, right?”
“No, I’m not. I think you need to forgive yourself. Some horrible things happened to you and you’re acting as if you did it all. You didn’t know about your dad, so how could you have saved him? You didn’t know that man would drink and drive that again.”
“I should have called my dad more often. I should have let that drunk be found guilty.”
“But you couldn’t have known.”
“No, I couldn’t have known.”
“And you’ve tried to handle it all alone.”
Great, she’s going to keep pushing. Why did women always want to fix him? He had always kind of liked his angry, detached persona. He didn’t owe anyone anything.
“I’m fine on my own, Penelope. I’ve handled life for a long time that way.”
“Yes, and you’ve done a great job.”
“You want me to pray and have faith, don’t you?”
“I’m not going to push that on you. I found answers in faith. I’m not going to tell you that faith or God are the answer for your life.”
“But…”
She laughed a little. He’d missed that laugh.
“But maybe, if you’d give God a chance…”
“Right.”
“Maybe cut yourself some slack. You might call those parents. Maybe if you—”
He had to cut her off. “I’m not going to soothe my conscience at their expense. They lost their daughter. They don’t need to hear from the lawyer who helped set that monster free.”
“Maybe.”
If they weren’t in the truck and if he hadn’t been driving, he might have kissed her. It seemed like the perfect way to stop her from pushing further. It seemed like the perfect idea, no matter what.
Chapter Twelve
They parked next to Penelope’s bed-and-breakfast, also a short walk from the church. She glanced in the direction of the pretty little building. It looked so quaint among the town’s other buildings. Streetlights glowed, casting circles of light on snow-covered walks. A few shop windows were decorated with Thanksgiving cutouts, turkeys and pilgrims made out of plastic.
“Do you want to have a cup of coffee?” She held onto Tucker’s hand as he walked her up the sidewalk.
He glanced from her to the church. “I can’t. I need to think about some things.”
“I’m sorry for being so hard on you.”
He smiled, towering over her with broad shoulders that were even broader in the heavy coat. A stocking cap covered his head. He touched her cheek with a gloved hand. “You pushed me to think about things that I’ve dwelt on but haven’t dealt with. Thank you.”
He kissed her softly, tenderly, his lips moving over hers and holding her captive. She held onto his arms, holding onto the last bit of sanity she thought she possessed. In his arms she was strong. She wasn’t Penelope Lear. She was someone who knew how to survive. In his arms, she didn’t back down.
She kissed him back. He murmured that she was beautiful as he kissed her cheek and stepped back.
“I’ll talk to you tomorrow.” He winked and walked away. The Alaska cold had never been as frigid as it was at that moment, when his warmth evaporated and she stood alone on that sidewalk in the dark. His back was a silhouette framed by the halo of a streetlight.
She watched him change directions and walk toward the most unexpected building, the church. He opened the door and a shaft of golden light hit the white ground outside. And then the door closed. She prayed he’d find what he was looking for inside.
The door behind her opened. She turned and smiled at Joleen.
“Hey, sweetie, want to grab a bite to eat?” Joleen was still wearing fur. She hadn’t quite bought into wearing what the locals wore. She said she just couldn’t do it, not even if it won Harry Peters’s heart.
“I’d love to.”
“Was that the handsome lawyer-turned-recluse out here with you?”
Penelope glanced toward the church and nodded. “It was.”
Joleen whistled. “Honey, I’ve seen some handsome men in my time, but that one is a keeper.”
“Not really.” Penelope smiled at Joleen. “How are things going with you and Harry?”
“I don’t think he’s interested at all. If he is, well, that Delilah will get him. He’s her Samson. I think she wants him to spite me.”
“She doesn’t, but that’s for the two of you to work out. Just talk to her.”
“I don’t know if I want to. But he’s a sweet man, that Harry is. He’s just real, you know what I mean?”
“Yes, I think I do.”
It was wrong for her to think about Tucker. Every detail about a man, every character trait shouldn’t make her think of him, wonder about him, or want to talk to him. She’d never had a relationship with a man that included wanting to just be around him.
She wished Wilma Johnson was still in town so they could talk about it.
“Stop looking so glum, sweetie. It’ll all work out. You’ll see. I’m learning a lot in this little ol’ town. And one thing I’m realizing is that God has a way of working things out.”
“Thanks, Joleen, I appreciate that.”
They walked into Lizbet’s and sat down at a corner table. The place was pretty quiet. A few couples sat together at one large table. A couple of men sat in a corner booth. They turned to stare when Joleen and Penelope entered. Penelope shivered and it wasn’t from the cold. She couldn’t take her eyes off two men in flannel jackets, caps pulled low over shaggy heads.
“That’s a couple of hoodlums if ever I did see a couple.” Joleen slid her coffee cup to the side, and when the waitress approached, she asked for just a glass of water with a slice of lime.
The waitress shook her head. “Joleen, you try that all the time and you know we don’t have limes.”
“Sorry, honey. How about water on the rocks with a squeeze of lemon juice.”
“You got it.”
The waitress took their order and hurried away.
“I don’t feel real comfortable in here right now.” Joleen shot a look in the direction of the men at the corner table. “What do you say we get our food to go?”
Penelope watched the men, and the fear that had been an ember started to grow. She nodded. “Yes, I think leaving would be a good idea.”
One of the men folded a piece of paper and slipped it in his pocket. He continued to watch her, and she stared back until she lost her nerve. His eyes were narrow and cold. She shivered and looked away.
At least the two of them were together, she and Joleen. But it made her mad that she had to be afraid. She wouldn’t have been thinking like this if Tucker hadn’t put the thought in her mind.
Tucker opened his door the next morning to find his friend Jake standing outside.
“What are you doing here so early?”
“Thought you might have a cup of coffee to share with a friend.” Jake shrugged out of his coat and hung it on the hook next to the front door.
“Yeah, right. I do have coffee, but I can tell by the look on your face that you have a lot more on your mind than that.”
Tucker motioned in the direction of the kitchen and Jake led the way, leaving a trail of melt
ing snow in his wake. Tucker walked into the kitchen behind him and Jake was already getting a cup out of the cabinet.
“Sure, help yourself.”
Jake grinned. “Want me to pour you a cup?”
“Since you’re already there, yeah, sure.”
Tucker sat down at the kitchen table and waited. He gave up being patient when Jake sat down, stirred sugar into his cup and started to drink his coffee.
“Why are you really here?”
Tucker didn’t want coffee. He’d had nearly a pot since he got up that morning.
“Heard you made an appointment to talk to Gordon Baker.”
Tucker had started to pick up the cup, but he set it back down. “There’s nothing secret in this town, is there?”
Jake laughed. “Not at all. I also heard you were seen kissing Penelope Lear.”
“Nice, now you’re gossiping.”
“Not so. If it’s the truth, it isn’t gossip. Is it true?”
“It’s true.”
“Penelope Lear and talking to Gordon. Interesting.”
Tucker sighed. “Jake, I really don’t want to talk about this.”
“Of course not. So let’s move on to something else. I’d like for you to be my best man.”
“If I can’t talk you out of it, I guess I’ll walk you to your fate.”
Jake grinned. “Don’t worry, you’ll get your turn.”
“I don’t plan on it.”
“The second bit of gossip is that you left Penelope Lear and headed for church.”
“Man, this is about to do me in. Why in the world would I want to stay in a town that has spies on every corner?”
“Because it’s a great place to be.” Jake got up to refill his cup. “Because living here changes a man. It settles you. Everything isn’t a rush, another case, another deal.”
“Family values and happily-ever-afters.”
“Sarcasm and chronic indigestion is so much better.” Jake sat back down. “Oh, sorry, did you want more coffee?”
“I’ve had enough.” He’d had more than enough.
“Yeah, but I’m not done. I’m here to see if you need to talk to a friend. Yeah, I know that church is a great place to unload some troubles, but I thought—”
“That I’d share so you could go back and report what you learned.”
Jake had the good sense to look a little sorry. “Whatever you tell me is between us.”
“Yeah, I know that. I’m just a little tired of my life being up for debate. Gage was here last night quizzing me. I’m thankful for friends, but sometimes space is good.”
“Right. I’m sorry about that.” Jake sat back in the chair. “Are you getting things wrapped up here?”
Tucker was able to smile. “My dad was a pretty savvy investor. I’ve found things I hadn’t expected.”
“Yeah, I kind of figured that. He would share from time to time.”
He hadn’t shared with Tucker. “I should have called him more often.”
“You didn’t know.”
“That isn’t an excuse. Man, Jake, I didn’t get to tell him goodbye. Every single day I wake up thinking about that and wondering if he knew that I loved him. But we were so busy being men, we couldn’t let go of our stubbornness.”
“Men do that sometimes.” Jake didn’t smile. “Look at my struggles with my own kid. She had me pretty twisted up with worry, but she’s doing great now. We’re both doing great. We stopped being angry and we—” he cleared his throat “—we realized it was okay to be loved.”
“I’m glad you’ve found that.” Tucker leaned his chair back and thought about the changes in his friend. It wasn’t all bad, a family coming together, finding some happiness.
Tucker’s dad had been his hero—and they’d fought like crazy.
“What about you?”
Tucker set the chair back down on all four legs. “I’m going to be okay. I called Anna’s family last night. I explained who I was. I don’t know why I called. I’m not sure if they had ever given me a thought, but I needed to tell them how sorry I am.”
“Did it help?”
“Yeah, it did. I also decided to take a big chunk of Dad’s savings and start a scholarship for children who have lost a parent to a drunk driver.”
“That’s pretty great, Tucker. Let me know if I can help.”
“I will.”
Jake glanced at his watch. “I have two ladies waiting for me to take them shopping. Are you going to be at the practice tonight?”
“Practice?”
“For the Christmas pageant. I’m sure we could use your bass voice.”
“I don’t think I’m up for that. It’s been a long time since I’ve sang.” Especially in church.
“Yeah, well, we could use you if you decide to show up. Don’t worry, I’ll protect you from the swarms of single women who are going to flock you. Dressed like that, they probably think you’re one of the locals and not one of the burnt-out businessmen types that they’re trying to escape from.”
“I’ll wear a suit and tie.”
“Right, throw ’em off the scent.”
Tucker walked Jake to the front door. His truck was idling in the driveway.
“Give Penelope my regards.” Jake laughed as he walked away.
“Don’t slip on the ice and break your stinking neck.” Tucker walked back inside, but he couldn’t get his mind back on the work he needed to do. Instead, he pulled out pictures of his dad, of the two of them.
And his mind kept returning to Penelope. He was staying far away from that pageant practice.
The room grew crowded as people gathered for the Christmas pageant practice. It was almost too warm with so many people. Penelope pulled off her coat and carried it under her arm. As she glanced around she smiled. She was starting to look like a local. In her boot-cut jeans, sweatshirt and insulated boots, she fit in. She loved fitting in.
Joleen moved through the crowd wearing her heavy faux fur coat and cap. And Joleen fit in, in her own special way. She probably looked just as out of place in her small Tennessee town as she did here.
She was just her own person.
Which was what Penelope was becoming.
People started to group up. Penelope hadn’t been to a practice before. At first she’d been new to town and hadn’t felt like she should. Then she had taken her little trip into the woods. She refused to call it “getting lost.”
Today Amy had invited her to join them. It had been another step in becoming a part of Treasure Creek. She’d even looked at a little house on the edge of town.
She had driven past Tucker’s dad’s house and watched Tucker loading a few things in the back of his truck. He probably wouldn’t be here long. She told herself it didn’t matter. He wasn’t the reason she was staying here. She was staying because she wanted to be from Treasure Creek.
It was no longer about finding someone to spend her life with. She wasn’t worried about her dad trying to pick a husband for her. She’d refuse. She was almost twenty-seven, and she wasn’t going to allow her life to be arranged that way.
Why in the world had it taken her so many years to realize she didn’t have to hide who she was or what she wanted?
She moved to a corner and watched the crowds of people. She watched Joleen turn away from Harry, like she hadn’t seen that he was heading her way. Oh, big mistake.
As soon as she could get Joleen alone, she’d try to help her. Poor Joleen, she was either coming on too strong or making poor Harry think she didn’t like him at all.
“What are you doing over here in the corner? Don’t tell me you’re a wallflower?” The husky voice was familiar and set a shiver loose down her spine.
She smiled up at Tucker. He was wearing a heavy, flannel shirt and jeans. Every single woman in the place appeared to be eyeing him.
“I am a wallflower. It’s easier to watch people from the sidelines. And you’re trying to blend in, but instead you’ve made yourself a target for every single
woman on the hunt for a rugged bachelor from Treasure Creek.”
“Which is why I’m hanging with you tonight. It’s simple. I stick close to you and they all think I’m taken.”
“But you’re not.” Her heart ka-thumped in a funny way.
“No, I’m not.”
“What if I want to talk to a man tonight? Someone other than a confirmed bachelor pretending he’s not a lawyer?”
“Do you?”
Her heart beat a little harder and she didn’t want to play his games. She stared into eyes that changed colors depending on the lighting and what he wore. But they were always warm, always so alive in a face that had become familiar and a part of her dreams.
“Maybe.” She looked away because it hurt too much. Her heart hurt.
“I won’t get in your way.” He smiled and then winked. “I’ll even go stand in a corner by myself if you want.”
Did she want him gone? Did she want to feel that cold again, the cold she’d felt the other day when he walked away after kissing her? She didn’t think so. She wanted to feel warm and safe.
He was anything but safe.
“You can stay.”
“Thank you.” He moved a little closer to her side. “I saw you drive by today.”
“I was looking at a house that I might buy.”
“You’re thinking of staying here?”
“I know that’s hard for you to imagine. I saw you packing and I know you can’t wait to get back to your life and career. But I love it here. I love that life is slower paced and people know one another.”
“They know each other in the city.”
“I know, but it isn’t that. It’s…it’s just that this is the type of place I’ve always wanted to be from.”
“It’s a fantasy, Penelope. This isn’t a perfect place with perfect people.”
“I’m aware of that. I know life won’t be perfect here. But when it isn’t perfect, I’ll have friends who actually care enough to listen to me, or to give me advice.”
“Not many of those people in your life back in Anchorage?”
“Not really.”
“Yeah, I guess you have a point. People here care enough to get involved. You’ll fit in. You like to involve yourself in other people’s lives.”
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