His face was incredibly close to mine now, and my eyes could clearly pick out the intriguing mixture of dirty-blond, dark brown, and fiery red in his stubble; I wanted to study the varying shades for hours. I never wanted to see it again. He’s taken…and I’m not interested. When Hayden spoke, his voice was so low I almost thought I could feel it vibrating against my rib cage. “Did the bull scare you? You really shouldn’t let fear win…” He blinked, then pulled back and said, “Besides, I have a feeling it’s been a while since you’ve had a good…buck.”
That loosened my tongue. “Wouldn’t you like to know,” I purred, stepping into his side. My goal had been just to torment him with something he could never have, but as soon as our hips pressed together, that familiar heat from the hot tub resurfaced, and everything but the two of us dissolved from my consciousness. Just like when we were racing, I suddenly had tunnel vision, and he was all I could see.
Hayden was breathing heavier and there was heat in his eyes as his lip curled into a devilish one-sided grin. “Maybe I would like that,” he whispered, almost too low for me to hear. And as if he had dragged a mild electric current over my skin, my entire body started buzzing with energy. The fact that his date was somewhere nearby made his comment ten times more inappropriate, but my body didn’t seem to care, and when he sucked his bottom lip into his mouth, I swear the room started spinning. Jesus, I couldn’t get drunk on one beer, could I?
Abruptly, Hayden took a step back and shook his head like he was clearing it. The loss of contact was like waking from a dream—sounds around me got louder, the smell of the bar became more pungent. Hayden’s smile turned smug as he studied my face. “But it’s probably better if you leave. Watching you walk away is far more enticing than anything you’d do on that bull.” He ended his comment with a wink. Philandering, flirtatious asshole.
Looking over my shoulder, I saw that my teammates were just starting to ride the bull, and luckily everyone was preoccupied watching Eli get tossed around. Since Hayden shouldn’t be getting any sort of satisfaction from seeing my ass walking away from him, I turned sideways and inched my way back to where Myles and Nikki were waiting. Hayden’s chuckle followed me the entire way.
When I returned to Nikki’s side, she did a double take, then hugged me. “Oh good! You changed your mind!”
I gave her a halfhearted smile, then scowled at Myles. “You owe me for this, Kelley.” For good measure, I finished my statement by flicking his nose with my finger. He rubbed it as if he’d been stung by a bee, and I finally smiled fully.
Nikki went on the bull after Eli, and of course, she loved every second of the gratuitous display. Ralph and Myles laughed the entire time; shy Kevin respectfully turned away. Ralph went next, and he was surprisingly good at it. I had to wonder if he had some real-life experience bull riding. Maybe he was a cowboy in his spare time. That image brightened my mood for a moment. Until Myles turned to me and said, “You’re up.”
Internally I cringed. Damn it. Since it was too late to back out, I decided to throw on a bright, carefree smile and fake it. “Excellent. Can’t wait.”
Myles patted my arm. “Good luck!”
Lacing my voice with confidence, I told him, “I’m a professional road racer. I don’t need luck with this bucking bike wannabe.” Please don’t let me fall off in the first five seconds.
I had to walk past the bull’s controller to get to the padded circle where I was about to meet my fate. On a whim, I slapped my hands on his table and leaned over the top of his control board. The guy looked up at me with wide, startled eyes. He had to be about my age, but he seemed around fifteen as I stared him down. With my most intimidating voice, I told him, “Look here, buddy. You’re going to give me the ride you give the men, or I’m going to come back over here and use you as my personal stress relief ball. And I’ve got a lot of pent-up frustration. Do we understand each other?”
The guy blinked at me as he nodded. Hopefully I’d get a regular ride now, and not the jiggly kind. I did not need that kind of embarrassment tonight.
Feeling determined, I climbed onto the saddle and decided to own this bull just as hard as I’d owned the track earlier. If I could rocket along the concrete at over 150 miles per hour, then I could handle this stationary piece of machinery. This should be easy in comparison.
Flashing the bull operator a final warning look, I settled in for the potentially wild ride. When I gave him the go-ahead, he played with some switches on his board, and the bull slowly came to life. Clutching the pommel with both hands, I tried to get my bearings as the bull started rotating. It was a strange rocking, circling movement, one I definitely wasn’t used to. Damn it, I could not get thrown off this bull. I had something to prove.
Once I felt comfortable with the motion, I let go of the pommel with one hand and leaned back, copying every bull riding movie I’d ever seen. It was easier said than done, but after a few seconds, I felt like I actually had the hang of it, and found it wasn’t as difficult as I’d feared. There was something strangely sensual about the movement of the machine, and the memory of my hip pressed against Hayden’s only amplified the sensation. I tried to ignore the spark of tingling desire, but the more I tried, the stronger it became.
As I spun and bucked, my mind drifted into fantasy. I knew it was wrong on multiple levels, but I started imagining that Hayden was with me on the bull, in front of me, facing me, and every forward movement had me crashing into his body. I once again felt the world retreating, and it was just imaginary Hayden and me left in the bar, striving toward a common goal. I shouldn’t indulge in this…but it feels so good.
Closing my eyes, I concentrated on the intense ache beginning to form in my core, begging for release. I imagined Hayden putting his hands all over me, his warm mouth traveling across my skin, his body sliding in and out of mine, and the embers of desire started churning into a passionate fire. Knowing who was turning up the heat inside me almost squelched the raging inferno, but the continual rocking motion of the bull quickly pushed me past the point of no return; I couldn’t have cared less at that moment that I despised Hayden. In fact, it only made the visual that much sweeter, turned the sensuous movement into something erotic and forbidden. Unknowingly, Hayden was driving me toward something wonderful and amazing, something he wouldn’t ever be able to partake in. It was my own form of victory.
Just the thought of climaxing right here, right now, with everyone watching, was enough to have my heart racing. The thin cotton pants I was wearing made it easy to focus my energies on the desire cresting within me, and if I could get just a little more stimulation, I knew I’d fall apart almost instantly. God, it had been way too long since I’d felt this…
The ride was getting wilder, making it harder to hold on, but I really didn’t care about that anymore. I was close to feeling something epic, I just needed a little more to get me all the way there. As subtly as I could, I leaned forward on the bull, so all my sensitive spots were grinding against the saddle. The bull crashed down at just the right time, with just the right pressure, and I instantly hit the wall. Oh…my fuck. God…Yes, Hayden…Yes…
I was barely done riding out the waves of orgasmic bliss when the bull suddenly stopped moving. I was panting and my heart was racing, and I had no idea what the crowd around me had seen. Because of how long I’d stayed on the bull, they were all cheering and clapping—even the guy controlling the beast looked impressed—but Jesus, had any of them noticed I’d just had an orgasm? On a freaking bull? Thinking about freaking Hayden Hayes? God…I felt dirty. I wanted to scream in frustration, I wanted to hit something, I wanted to run and cry. But I had to act completely normal, just in case by some miracle they had missed that performance.
As I hopped off the bull, I nonchalantly scanned the crowd. No one seemed shocked, no one seemed scandalized, and no one seemed stunned. In fact, no one seemed to have noticed anything strange about that bull ride at all. Were they all really that oblivious? Even Myles and Nikki only
seemed happy that I’d been successful on the bull. Damn it…way too successful. My heart soared with glee at the thought that I might have perfectly hidden the euphoria that had pounded through me. Then I accidentally looked over at Hayden, and my bubble of relief instantly popped as our gazes locked.
From the frenzied look of wild desire in his eyes and the fact that his hand was discreetly squeezing the front of his jeans, I knew he was fully aware of what I’d just done. While he stared at me with heavy breath and parted lips, I was suddenly struck by an undeniable rush of attraction.
I desperately wanted his hard, naked body wrapped around mine, wanted to feel the softness of his skin under my fingers, and wanted him to taste the inevitable wetness he inspired. Then I wanted him to drive into me, to give me another mind-blowing release, and I wanted us to work together to achieve it. I wanted to jointly reach for something bigger than ourselves…And wanting that from him freaked me the fuck out.
Not this guy—he’s taken, he’s trouble, he’s not what I need right now. I have too much to do, too much at stake, too much to prove…too much to save.
.
Chapter 7
I needed to get out of this bar. Glancing back as I cut through the crowd, I saw Hayden still standing alone at the end of the line. His emerald eyes were glued on me, and the second our gazes connected, I felt a flash of heat burn up my spine. My breath caught and I almost stumbled. Just the heat in his stare made me want his hands, lips, and body all over me. God, if just the fantasy of being with him gave me that much of a shuddering release, what would climaxing with him actually be like? What would his kiss taste like? What would his skin feel like? What would he sound like when he came…?
The sudden tingling rush of desire that immediately followed that thought made me want to run. Run, and never stop running. He’s not an option. Once I was outside, I gulped down the fresh air, hands over my knees like I’d just finished a marathon. Control, Kenzie. For fuck’s sake, work on your control!
“Are you leaving?”
The familiar voice sent a spike of ice through my heart. Oh no. Not now. Bolting upright, I spun around to face him. Hayden’s gaze raked over my body and his lips formed a smile that was entirely too sexy; what would his girl think if she saw him giving me a grin so seductive, it should be illegal.
“I was wrong,” he murmured. “So very, very wrong…That was far more appealing than watching you leave, and now…I really don’t want to ever watch you leave again.” His eyes seemed to glow with heat as he approached me, like a jungle cat stalking its prey. Without meaning to, I backed up a step. I’m no one’s prey.
“Well, I hate to disappoint you, but I have a cab to catch.” Unintentionally, I added, “And you have friends to get back to.”
His brows scrunched together at hearing the acid in my voice. As best I could, I schooled my features. Let him figure that one out himself; I certainly wasn’t going to remind him that he had a girlfriend.
Hayden closed the distance between us, but I stubbornly refused to retreat again. He was so close to me, I was practically straddling his thigh. It brought back the moment on the bull. His scent consumed me, that intriguing blend that reminded me of pounding surf, scorching sand, hot rays licking my skin. Goddamn Hayden Hayes. What the hell happened to me when he was around? It was like my head went one way while my body went another. Right became wrong, up became down.
“I’ve never met anyone quite like you. You’re more than I thought you were, so much more,” he said, stepping even closer. If he pushed any farther into my space, certain body parts were going to line up…and that could not happen.
“Back up,” I hissed, still refusing to move. I hadn’t meant to engage him, and I clamped my lips together in regret. Not another word would escape my mouth.
“When you let go…you’re amazing on the track. Fast, tight…perfect curves.” His eyes drifted down my front, and I inhaled a deep breath. Was he flirting or complementing me? Both were unnerving at the moment. I just wanted him to go away. “You really can ride, Kenzie,” he said with raised eyebrows, like I’d surprised him.
Seeing yet another man doubt my skills because of my gender doused the flames that had been flickering, and I broke my mental promise to not speak again. “Yeah, shocker of the year. I’m not just a pretty face. I actually earned my place on the team.”
For a half second he managed to look properly chastised while he absorbed my comment, but then his lips shifted into a charming smile. “No, you’re definitely not just another pretty face…but I meant that as encouragement. Sometimes I think you forget you’re as good as you are.”
Gathering my willpower, I took a step back, then quickly turned around to leave. He wasn’t inside my head; he couldn’t possibly know that. He was just messing with me. Hayden grabbed my arm, stopping me. “Wait, Kenzie. I just want to talk to you. Nothing more, I promise.”
“Yeah, right,” I muttered, yanking my arm away. I’d already seen the desire in his eyes. There was a lot more he wanted from me than conversation, and I had no intention of giving it to him. I shouldn’t even be talking to him. What if one of the guys came out here looking for me and saw this little…exchange? What if his girlfriend spotted us? I didn’t want to be fired or yelled at tonight. I needed to leave.
Eager to wipe this evening from my memory, I pulled out my cell phone as I stormed through the parking lot. The quicker I called a cab, the sooner I could get out of here.
Because Hayden was a stubborn asshole, he hurried after me. “Wait, Kenzie.” When I didn’t stop walking, he yelled, “Goddammit, wait!” Catching up to me, he grabbed my arm again and spun me around; I instantly jerked myself free. He was not allowed to touch me. Breathing heavier, he panted, “Would you relax and let me talk to you?”
Keeping my expression even, I calmly said, “There, you just talked to me,” and started searching for cab companies on my phone.
Hayden grabbed my cell from my hand and held it behind his back. “Why are you such a bitch?” he asked, his eyes intense.
Something in the air started sizzling between us. Sparks were flaring to life with an almost audible crackle, and I felt the kinetic energy vibrating through every pore, every cell. In some sick, twisted turn of fate, just being around him fueled me, fed me, sharpened my senses. What would it be like if I caved, if I lowered my defenses? Not just some lust-filled daydream, but the real thing? No…he was the last person I wanted to be with.
“Give me my phone back,” I seethed.
“No. Not until you stop being stubborn and talk to me.” His tone was so commanding, it instantly enraged me. Who the hell did he think he was? My father?
“Talk to you about what?” I asked, clenching my hands into fists. If I pushed him away would he leave me alone? If I pulled him into my body, would he stay?
Eyes hot with passion and desire, he snarled, “Well, how about this thing between us, for starters.” His gaze slid down my body, and I knew he was referencing the heat that seemed to hover in the air whenever we got close. Even now, I could feel it pulsing against my skin. The fantasy of him had helped bring me to release, but my body was thudding a message deep inside—it wasn’t enough. His eyes inspecting my every curve was only making the dull ache grow stronger with every passing second. No, he’s a Benneti. He’s a thug. He’s taken. He’s not for me.
“I have no idea what you’re talking about,” I said flatly.
With obvious effort, Hayden pulled his eyes back to my face; the loss made a shudder run through me. He smirked, then said, “Right, your go-to answer. So would you just like to stick a pin in that and move on to the next topic—the fact that we race better when we’re together. And there’s no point in denying that, so don’t even try. I know I race faster when you’re beside me, and I know you race faster when you’re beside me. We should be practicing together.”
Just the thought of hopping on a bike and going full bore against him had my heart beating quicker and my mind spinning with
need for a different kind of excitement. Yes, I loved racing him; I felt more secure, more confident, and more relaxed with him…more like the racer I was supposed to be. And I hated that I felt that way; I didn’t want anything from Hayden, especially the thrill he gave me when we were going all out. Knowing I needed to end this pattern before it even began, I told him, “There is no way in hell I can practice with you. It isn’t possible for the two of us to be on the track at the same time. We’ll both be fired, and you know it. So you’re just going to have to grow up and get better on your own.”
His eyes darkened. “You’re better when you’re going up against me. If you want to make a splash this year, get people noticing you, talking about you, talking about Cox Racing…then you should train with me, and only me.” He stepped even closer, so his body was flush with mine. The growing desire I’d been struggling to extinguish shifted into a raging inferno at his nearness. I felt delirious with the need for more, yet furious that he was the one making me feel this way.
“Don’t tell me what to do,” I said, shoving him away from me. “I’m not a child.”
He stepped forward until we were toe-to-toe again. His breath was heavy, and I was shocked to find that mine was too. “Are you sure? Because sometimes you really act like one. I’m just trying to help you. I’m just trying to help us both. Is that so wrong?”
Yes. In our case, it was. Helping each other was forbidden. Besides, rumor had it he only helped himself. And while I wasn’t sure about the plausibility of the bike tampering, the helping himself part of the story I completely believed—him being out here flirting with me while his date dutifully waited inside the bar was proof of that. All of this was only about Hayden helping Hayden.
Hayden’s chest was heaving, and when I glanced down, I could see an inch or so of skin at his waist as his shirt lifted and lowered. Even knowing what a bad idea this was, seeing his bare skin was torture; it called to my fingertips, urging me to touch, to explore. I wouldn’t cave, though. Not to this man. Lifting my jaw as I refocused my resolve, I told him, “I’m a grown woman, a daughter of a legend, and I don’t need your help. Now give me back my phone.”
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