Tears poured, years of sorrow and suppressed rage mingled in the hot droplets and quickly dampened the soft material that she leaned against. Little by little the rage melted away until only one raw emotion remained.
Grief.
Tabby gazed blankly out the cockpit window and stared, unseeing, through the smoked crystal at the shuttle bay. An empty numbness had replaced the turbulent rage. She struggled to reason why that bulbous, blabbering idiot had been able to set her off so explosively. She had been called worse, treated more harshly, and certainly threatened in much more menacing ways. So why had that thing affected her so strongly?
The answer was simple. The rejection of a mother. She had never known hers, and the women she had kept company with over the years were either strictly professional or military personnel; the latter of which had avoided her at every possible turn. She needed Seth. She needed to feel his arms around her and hear his promises to make all this pain go away. The thought crossed her mind that he would be angry about her decision to go to the flight deck instead of their room, but she trusted him to understand. What if he doesn't, though? What if he decides that I'm too much work and he's better off without me? No! She could not allow that to happen. She had lost track of how long she had been on this strange, new world, nor had she seen much of it, but she knew one thing for certain: in her mind and her heart, this was now home.
"Fuck!" she muttered, trying to open the hatch. There were no handles, buttons, dials or panels inside the door. She slapped the metal hard, bruising her hand. "How the hell do I get out of this tin can? Help!" she shouted. No one answered.
***
Without a clock, she was unable to calculate how long she'd been stuck in the vessel before the hatch finally opened to reveal a very upset, albeit relieved, Lotopian man.
"Dear Ceres! You're alive!" Seth exclaimed, snatching her in his arms and squeezing her so tightly that she begged for release. "I was so worried. It's been nearly a full phase and I've had every person on this planet looking for you. Father is sick to death over this, as well!" He held her at arm's distance, tears in his eyes. "Damn it, Tabitha! Why didn't you just go to our room like I told you to?"
"I'm sorry. I couldn't get out of here and had no way to call you."
"It would not have been an issue had you just listened! We will talk about your disobedience later. Right now, let's get you some food and let everyone know you are safe."
Kalavan rushed to hug Tabby the moment they walked through the door. Genuine tears streamed from his eyes as he covered her face with kisses and ran his large hands over her face, hair and arms to reassure himself that she was unharmed. Once convinced that she was well, his expression shifted.
"You had us worried, young lady! How dare you take off without a word? Consider yourself fortunate that I'm not your father, because right now you would be finding yourself over my lap and getting the strapping of your life," he scolded. "Once I was done with that, you would be grounded indefinitely. I cannot believe you did such a thing. I've never had to deal with such a careless stunt! Not even from my own son!"
"That is not true. I have done far worse, and much more careless and inconsiderate things. Father, I am truly sorry," Seth said, touching the king's shoulder. "I never understood how frightened you must have been every time I flew to the Archives and risked my safety, or climbed off the platform outside my room and down the palace wall. Please forgive me."
Kalavan stared at the young man in stunned silence, locking eyes with him. He inhaled deeply. "You've been practicing your Ability, haven't you? I can tell by how you just touched my soul. Of course I forgive you. That is both a parent's gift, and our curse. We love and forgive despite the things that are done to cause us anguish." He hugged his son and then turned again to Tabby. "It is out of respect for Mesethius that I will not impose discipline upon you for causing so much worry, but I insist that you never go anywhere unsupervised again. Am I understood?"
"Yes, sir. I'm sorry, Grandpa." She dropped her eyes. Having someone care so deeply for her was still something she could not quite grasp.
"I must speak in her defense regarding the length of her absence. That was not by intent, or done out of spite. She was trapped in your cruiser and had no means to contact us," Seth explained.
"Just what were you doing in my vehicle, missy?"
"Hiding," she answered timidly. "When the queen attacked me and said those awful things, I just needed to run away and hide."
"Hiding," he repeated. "Because running away and hiding solves all your problems, does it?"
"No, sir," she whispered, hanging her head and feeling her adulthood melt away. "I just got really emotional and didn't want to face Daddy."
"That was very irresponsible of you. I am very disappointed." Kalavan shook his head. "Son? My advice is that you deal wisely with this so that it does not happen again. Next time she might not be as lucky, and find herself being made into the stew your mother was dreaming about. Regarding her freedom, I insist you heed my command and do not permit her to attend anywhere without an escort."
"Yes, Father. I accept your advice and assure you that a lesson will be thoroughly taught," came the firm response.
Tabby's stomach rose in her throat. What was he going to do?
Kalavan leaned over and kissed the bridge of her nose. "I expect to see you at dinner tonight. If the queen decides to pollute our evening with her presence, I ask you to contain yourself and allow us to handle her. You know we will protect you, right?"
"Yes, sir."
"Good girl. I'm taking my leave now."
Tabby's mouth grew dry as she watched the door close behind him. She looked up into Seth's frowning face with worried eyes. "Now what?" she asked hesitantly.
"Now I will feed you and then get you cleaned up. That will give me some time to decide on the best course of action."
"Daddy, I'm so sorry. Please don't be mad."
"The only anger inside me is directed towards that animal and how she treated you," he said, holding her to his body and kissing the top of her head. "I know the length of your absence is not your doing."
"So I'm not in trouble?"
"I didn't say that. You disobeyed me. Your actions cost people time from their own lives because they were searching the city for you by command of the king. You worried one of the kindest men on this planet to tears. You made me feel…" His voice trailed off. "You made me feel as though I was inconsequential."
"How did I do that?"
"Respect is very important to my culture. I've told you that. Respect is not just about how we speak to one another, but is also shown in our consideration and honor of one's time and resources, the manner in which we care for each other, and how we obey instructions and orders. When we shirk on any of these things, it sends the message that we are irrelevant and not worthy of honor."
"That's not true. I respect you and, well, I'm even learning to love you," she said.
"Tabby?" Seth drew in a deep breath. "What is the most valuable resource universally—the one thing that you can never replenish?"
"I dunno. Time?"
"Good girl. Yes, time. How important was time for you before you arrived here?"
"Time was a matter of life and death. That's why they were going to stop time in my body during the suspended animation process," she told him.
"So it was very important to you. Important enough that you were willing to lose a little bit of that precious resource in order to possibly gain more. Correct?"
"I guess. In a way, I bought time at the cost of what little I knew remained, and without knowing if it would ever be restored. What's the point?"
"Sit on my lap." He held a piece of fruit to her mouth and used his hand to wipe the juice that drizzled down her chin. "The point is that you valued your time enough to put it at risk to gain more. How many people's resources and how much money did it take for you to be afforded that risk?"
"I have no idea."
"What would thos
e people think if you'd decided to, as humans say, 'pull the plug' after you had been launched? Would they feel that their offerings had any value to you, or that you respected the irreplaceable amount of time and limited resources that they gave up for you?"
"I suppose not." She contemplated his words. "That's very different to me not going to my room after fighting with your mother, though."
"How is it different, except by the scenario? I have given you all of this…" He gestured around him. "I've given you my heart, as well, and yet you were not even able to obey a simple command to wait in our room while I handled the problem. Was I not important enough for you to mind me?"
He paused, feeding her another bite of food. "I'm struggling with this, baby. Placing my gratitude that you are alive and well aside, I have to consider how this affects our relationship. If I can't trust you to obey me in the little things, how can I trust you to follow me in the larger ones?"
"I guess it would be hard," she admitted.
"Yes, it would be. It also tells me that your own desires are more important to you than we are as a unit."
"A unit? You acted as though I was your pet!"
"You are my pet," he said and smiled, cupping her face. "A special little being to be loved, nurtured, cared for and, yes, even trained. One worthy of respect, honor and freedom. But I can't give you all of that until you earn my trust."
"In other words, I fucked up."
"Yes, you fucked up."
"How much trouble am I in?" she asked timidly.
"I'll decide that once you are done with your bath."
"I don't suppose that explaining to you why I was so upset would make a difference, would it?"
"I would hope that you would share something with me because you cared and respected me, not because you were trying to save yourself from being punished."
Tabby sighed. "It was rejection. Cold, hard, ugly rejection. I know it sounds stupid, but it just triggered something inside me."
"Your mother?"
"I suppose. She left right after I was born, so I never knew her. You know everything else. It was just so blatantly in in my face that I snapped."
"Did you consciously make the choice to disobey me at any time?" he asked.
Tabby lowered her face and nodded.
He sighed. "I truly am sorry for all you have lived through. I also understand how rejection feels and what it can drive us to do, but you made a deliberate decision to reject me by ignoring my commands. How should I receive that?"
"I didn't think about any of that. I'm sorry," she whispered.
"I am, as well. Finish eating while I draw a bath for you."
Ordinarily, the prospect of a hot bath laden with thick, creamy bubbles was one that left her mouth watering. Not this time, though. Seth was quiet as he ran the wet cloth over her skin. There was nothing sensual in his touch and his gaze was distant, as though lost in deep contemplation. The odd mixture of scents filled her nose; winter rain, wet soil and cinnamon. It was the scent of sadness, with the tiniest touch of anger.
"Daddy? Why would you smell like winter rain and not spring?" she asked timidly.
"Are you able to tell the difference? Amazing. Probably because spring rain is warmer and hopeful. I'm not feeling either right now."
"What can I do to convince you that I really am sorry? I feel awful."
He inhaled. "Your scent is odd. Red clover, and something else. It reminds me of the vapors that rise from the diamond and platinum mines. Not burning, not bitter… it's odd. Metallic. It is guilt?"
"Probably. For what it's worth, I glad you found me. Thank you."
"I would never have rested until I did. Let's get you out of there and take care of what we need to do."
"Are you going to spank me?" She was surprised by the timid innocence of her own question.
He slipped a simple, loose gown over her head and silently led her by the hand into the main room. Once there, he sat at the desk bench and brushed her hair, fastening it into two, short ponytails before he spoke.
"I'm afraid that I have to, baby girl. You disobeyed me. I understand that you were provoked and your anger was justified. I don't even fault you for that pathetic attempt to knock her down. I was probably more angry with her than you were."
"I thought you were angry with me."
"Not at all. I was getting annoyed that you were arguing with me, but I am growing quite accustomed to that part of your personality. The point is that I told you to do something and you ignored me. Whether you were provoked or not, you made a choice to disobey me. Did you not?" he asked, his voice devoid of the exasperation she'd expected.
"Yes, sir," she whispered.
"You feel guilt, which means that you also know that your choice was a bad one. You will be disciplined for it, and hopefully learn a lesson that won't have to be repeated." His voice was gruff with emotion. "Damn it, Tabitha. I hate to do this to you, but I have no choice. I'm asking you to please learn from this so that I don't have to do it again."
Tabby's lower lip began to tremble. Whether it was his heartbreaking attractants reacting with her body, or if it was the sincere repentance from her own heart, something welled up within her and broke out in her first, single cry. "I'm so, so sorry!"
With a deep sigh, he kissed her on the forehead and rested his warm lips against her skin. "I love you. Turn over my knee."
She reluctantly obeyed, sensing his hesitancy as he raised the back of her nightgown over her hips and tucked his large, left arm around her waist to secure her in place. She clenched her pink nates and tightly crossed her legs at the ankles, releasing a high-pitched whimper in the midst of her guilt-laden snuffles. He waited until her weeping had faded to a broken sniffling before raising his hand high and unleashing a rapid flurry of firm swats to the fleshiest part of her bottom.
Within seconds she was twisting, howling, bucking, and begging dolefully for mercy. Each smack was spread without partiality to both jiggling cheeks, sit-spots and the very tops of her thighs. She drummed her legs against the floor and then threw them high into the air before scissoring them wildly. His strokes were implacable. Determined. Her struggles weakened until, at last, she slumped in defeat.
"That was simply my hand. No current. No instrument," he said, resting his hot palm atop her scorched mounds. "We are not finished."
Tabby groaned as he picked up the hairbrush he had just used to fix her hair. He tapped her right arm. "Give me your hand. I don't want to accidentally strike it with the brush."
Not waiting for her to comply, he grabbed her tiny, vulnerable appendage and held it securely to the small of her back. She shrieked upon the snap of the hairbrush against her right check, then elapsed into a screaming fit and erratic struggles in a useless attempt to avoid the flood of sharp, stinging thrashes that focused on her tender sit-spots.
A wail of, "I'm sorrreee!" slipped from her lips, filled with mourning, regret and contrition, followed by her wilted surrender.
Seth paused mid-stroke, waited a moment, and then set the hairbrush down on the bed. His hand returned to the trembling, hot mounds and cupped the hot flesh with gentleness.
"Do we have to go through this again?" he asked.
"N-no…" Tabby bawled loudly into the side of his leg.
"I'm glad to hear that." He waited for her cries to quiet as he stroked her back. Sitting her up, he then handed her the ever-present goblet of water. "Drink. It's done. May I hold you?"
"No." She sniffed. She was hurt and embarrassed, and the last thing she wanted was to be touched. Even by him.
"Too bad. You're cute when you pout," he said lightly, wrapping his arms around her body.
"I'm not pouting," she mumbled, crossing her arms tightly over her chest and sticking her lower lip out.
"You do that every time I tell you not to pout. Kiss me."
"No."
"Yes," Seth insisted. "I love you."
"Yeah, love you too," she muttered.
"You don't soun
d very convincing," he teased gently.
"Bite me," she said and sniffled, wiping her face with the back of her hand and pushing him away a second time.
"I would love to."
Chapter Eleven
"Are you up to a little sight-seeing today, baby?" Seth asked, gently stroking his hand over Tabby's back. It had been two days since her spanking, and she had begged permission to stay 'holed' up in her room since then, for the purpose of both physical and emotional recovery. Despite the faded splotches that remained on her bottom, she had been overwhelmed by the love and care given to her. Seth waited on her hand and foot, read her stories that he had translated into English, and tried, albeit without success, to teach her some of his language.
Kalavan had visited them frequently, his sternness quickly melting when Seth had sadly described the severity of the girl's punishment. He'd also been surprised to learn that Tabby had refused to use the Ceres rays and attempt healing; however, he'd nodded with approval when she explained that to do so would have made the punishment appear 'unimportant,' and that she never wanted to hurt any of them like that again.
"What kind of sight-seeing? Is Grandpa coming?" she asked, cringing apprehensively as she turned onto her back, before gratefully discovering that the tenderness was minimal.
"No, it would just be us. I wanted to take you down into the river caves and maybe to the falls."
"I'd love that. I mean, would it be okay with your dad? He seems to be a bit insistent that I not be allowed out for a while. I guess he still believes I deserve to be grounded for life."
"That is because he's feeling protective. I think a part of him has always wanted a daughter," Seth said and chuckled. "Maybe we should start giving him a Grandpa Day so he doesn't feel neglected."
"That would be awesome! Hey, are you doing that aromatherapy crap on me?" She suddenly frowned.
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