by Mary Ting
The room fell deadly silent.
“She’s all yours.” The words came out sharp and cold. Cleo bumped his shoulder as she stormed out.
Rhett crossed his arms like a father about to scold his child. “Ava? What did you do?”
Still leaning back lazily, I feigned innocence. “I didn’t do anything.”
“Then what did you say?”
“Funny. I’m the one who got kidnapped—again—and you’re accusing me of doing something wrong?” I jolted up with my lips pressed tightly, my fists ready.
“Ava.” Rhett’s tone begged me to calm, his hands up to protect himself when I sprinted for him.
My treacherous muscles refused to swing at him. I halted right in front of him, the toes of his shoes touching mine. My heart lurched with bliss to see him well, to see his sunrise eyes beaming, his irresistible grin stripping me bare. Then Brooke’s face flashed between us, and guilt rendered me speechless.
“Ava, I’m sorry.” His voice lowered, and he looked sincere. “I decided at the last minute to give you a choice. But when Mitch said Mr. Novak was suspicious ...” Rhett swallowed and brushed his knuckles across my cheek, his loving gaze piercing mine. “I went crazy. I had to get you out. You have to understand my urgency. I can’t live in a world without you. And if I hadn’t gotten you out and something happened to you, I would never forgive myself.”
His words melted me to my marrow and my lingering rage vanished ... almost. I wouldn’t let his sweet confession talk me out of forgetting Brooke.
“Then you understand why I need to go back and get my friend out.”
Rhett gave me a sideways glance, his brow rumpled. “Have you not heard anything I’ve said?”
I crossed my arms and widened my stance. “I did. But if it was Ozzie or Reyna, you would go back and get them out. You have no emotional ties to Brooke. You have no say. Brooke saved me for the past few months. If it wasn’t for her friendship, I might not be so stable.”
Rhett’s eyebrows twitched and he contorted his face.
I blinked at the familiar expression, which triggered a flashback of us in a similar heated argument. I didn’t know what we had fought about, but what happened next had me all flustered and heat rushed through my veins.
Too hot. It was too hot even in the chilly atmosphere.
Although Rhett was gentle when he gripped my shoulders, his tone was anything but. “Damn it, Ava. You never think of yourself. You think your life is worth so little. You may not think you’re worth fighting for, but I do. I do.” He pulled me closer, his eyes roaming my face, and then concentrated on my lips.
Don’t look at me like that, Rhett. Now that I remember who you are and what you mean to me, I won’t be able to stop myself.
“You left me with no choice but to leave you.” His tone was filled with gut-wrenching hurt and regret.
“I know.” I cracked.
“I thought you were as good as dead.” His voice fractured, his eyes glassy under the energy-saving light.
“I know.” I placed my hands on his arms as he moved to cup my cheeks.
“I would have gotten you out sooner if I could have. And I felt so useless that I couldn’t do anything about it.”
“I know.”
Rhett blinked, baffled. “What do you mean you know? You remember?”
“Some.” I ran my thumb along his stubble, savoring the prickly, sensual touch.
Rhett paused, taking in my action, and an unexpected frown formed on his face.
What was his problem? I was practically throwing myself at him and he wasn’t responding the way I thought he would.
“You’re pretending to remember, aren’t you?” His eyes darkened. “This is all a cozy little lie to butter me up and get out. Isn’t it? It’s not going to work.”
I pushed back from him and glared. “I don’t remember everything, but I remember you. I remember the day I sacrificed myself so everyone else could have a chance.”
He recoiled a step, his features twisting into something I couldn’t read. “Don’t play with me. I can’t handle ...” Flustered, he scrubbed a hand across his face.
“I’m not.” I choked on the words.
Only recalling bits of my past frustrated me beyond measure, but at the same time, I welcomed whatever I could get. The last six months felt like I had been looking through a cloudy window I could never wipe clean. Tears pooled in my eyes.
His frown softened, but he continued to scrutinize me. The more I insisted I remembered, the less he believed me. Until finally he just pissed me off.
“Fine.” I shoved him to keep him at a distance. His closeness made me weak at the knees. “I’m lying. I don’t recall pushing you away just before a bullet hit your stupid backpack. I don’t remember running away to attract attention and getting hit with Mitch’s gun. I don’t remember how hearing you yell my name tore my heart into pieces and realizing I had made the mistake of a lifetime. And how I might never see you again. And then ... and then ...”
In one swift motion, Rhett picked me up and placed me on the table, then planted his hands on either side of me.
“And then what?” His eyes grew wider, like an eager child about to find what he was getting for Christmas.
“And then, just as Mitch drew back for the blow, I focused on the past memories, memories I needed to protect, I think. I’m not sure.” Tears streamed down my face without my consent. I hated that I let myself feel vulnerable and how it seemed to come easily with Rhett. “I needed to protect our friends who ran away with us, to protect Ozzie, Reyna, and mostly I wanted to protect ...” My heart dove to my feet and pain rippled through me so fast I felt it split into tiny pieces. I gasped for air.
“Ava.”
Rhett tried to get my attention, but the torment sucked me under. I gripped my chest as if I could stop the agony from erupting.
“You. I wanted to protect you.” I sobbed. “I lost you that day.” I sobbed harder. “But I had no regrets, knowing you were safe. Then everything went dark. I must have made myself forget. It’s the only explanation.”
The words sounded so final, like a death sentence. Tears flowed out of me like never before, and the rush of agonizing memories was too much to bear. There was something missing in the revelation, something I couldn’t recall.
Something vital was missing. Something wasn’t connecting right. What was it? The idea of a machine making me forget seemed farfetched, right?
“I’m so sorry. But I understand why you did what you did.” Rhett’s words were tender as he wiped my tears as they streamed down.
I pushed his hands away. One shove led to another, and I unleashed my anger on him. Anger because though I’d told him I had erased my memories, something still felt wrong.
He blocked my slaps and my loose punches. Our hands tangled and an old memory flashed in my mind. In the past, I’d been furious with him, and as I swung at him, he had blocked me just as he was now.
Rhett grabbed my wrists and held them. “Get mad. Get mad at me if you want. Do anything to remember it all. You did what you needed to do and so did I. Stop fighting it. Stop fighting me. You have to know you are everything to me. So, stop being so stubborn.”
I glared at him with conviction and yanked my arms back. “I’m not fighting it. I can’t remember everything, but it doesn’t matter. I know you.” I traced his thick eyebrows and down his perfect nose as if I were painting a portrait of him. “I know this face.” Then around his cheekbones. “I know your voice.” And to his soft lips. “I’ve kissed those lips plenty of times.” Then lower to his chest as my eyes followed my hands to his heart. “I feel you. And my heart beats only for you.” I said the words Rhett had said to me before we’d parted during our escape.
My heart beats only for you.
At those words, Rhett crushed his lips against mine. His kiss—powerful, hard, and full of passion. I returned it just as fiercely.
I laced my fingers through his hair, tugging him toward m
e until our bodies pressed together. I needed him, wanted him. I couldn’t have enough. I let my hands explore his body, familiar, yet new.
Every taut muscle, every curve, my heart said he belonged to me. So I let myself free, free to feel, free to be a girl in love with a guy.
Knowing how much he meant to me, and recalling parts of our story, I would not fight this any longer. My feelings for him would make me weaker, vulnerable, but what did I care?
I had so much to lose to ISAN, and yet I had much to gain. Without someone to care for, what was living?
I knew Rhett and I had a connection from the second I’d laid eyes on him on my first day of introduction in ISAN. But he was my instructor. I’d never thought my feelings would grow for him to another level.
I had fought hard to stay neutral, but every accidental brush of our hands, touching him during combat training, and months of flirtatious banter had made it difficult to be just friends.
As we kissed, a past memory zapped through my head. Rhett and I were kissing just like now, and I was sitting on his desk.
“We’ll get caught,” I panted, recalling the exact words I had said then.
I might have killed the mood, but it was a big deal to recall a similar moment, and I was sure Rhett would appreciate me telling him.
“We’re not in ISAN.” Rhett chuckled, his stubble tickling my lips as he spoke.
Then he stopped and stared into my eyes. With my head resting in his palm, he stroked my hair with his other hand and looked at me with new eyes.
“You remember this, don’t you?”
His happy grin made me giggle.
“Yes. We were just like this. But ...” I cocked my eyebrows and offered a coy smile. “We didn’t have—”
Rhett flushed briefly.
Too darn cute.
“If I had it my way, I would replay our memory.” Rhett waggled his eyebrows with a look of promise.
A different kind of heat burned through me. I held his tender gaze, and much was said in that quiet space as we connected, bridging a gap that had been broken. A part of me had been lost, walking in confused circles. Now I felt renewed.
The last piece of the puzzle had locked into place. That last piece had been Rhett. I had finally found my Rhett.
“How’s your back? You were bleeding. Reyna patched you up. I can give you something for the pain, but there are no Dr. Machines to fix you up.”
“Oh, that. I’m fine. I’ve been worse. Nothing I can’t tolerate.”
“You don’t have to pretend to be strong with me. Just let me know. I’ll take care of you.”
“Okay,” I sighed.
“What happened to you?”
“Yeah, well, we fell into a trap.” I shrugged. “Have you heard of a group called ANS?”
I told Rhett everything that had happened in the massive room, and he told me how Ozzie found out about the gala and how they got to the underground tunnel.
“I’m glad we got to you in time.” Rhett kissed my forehead and gingerly stroked my back.
I smiled, taking in the comfort of his touch. “Thank you.”
Rhett helped me ease off the desk to stand. “Come on. I’ll show you the rest of this place.”
“Where are we?” I brushed my hair with my fingers and checked my attire to make sure I was presentable. I had on my assassin’s skintight black pants, but with a T-shirt. Not mine.
Rhett opened a cabinet and tossed a flannel shirt at me. “Welcome to Hope City.”
Ava
When Rhett had told me about Hope City, I’d wanted a tour of the place, but he hadn’t known if he could trust me, and I didn’t blame him.
I shoved my arms through the sleeves and buttoned up eagerly.
“You missed one.” Rhett unbuttoned and then rebuttoned my shirt.
My lips quirked when he met my gaze.
He paused and though he was looking at me, he was somewhere else in time. “Do you remember the move I taught you the first day of training?”
I dipped my head. Though I didn’t want to disappoint him, I didn’t intend to lie. “No. Sorry. I don’t.”
Rhett placed his finger under my chin to tilt my head. “Hey. Don’t be sorry. Don’t ever feel sorry for what you can’t control.” Lowering his hand, he gave me a sideways glance. “You might think you don’t remember, but I bet you do.”
I gave him an inquisitive look. Before I could ask him what he meant, his fingers came close to clasping around my throat. I acted on instinct.
I gripped Rhett’s wrist, twisted without breaking my hold, and slammed him into the glass wall. My elbow pressed the crook of his neck while my other hand held his arm behind his back. One side of his face was pressed to the window.
Rhett would never hurt me, but at that moment, Rhett had become my foster father—the cat taunting the mouse before the kill. I’d become the terrified rat he had called me.
I was only thirteen. I had just lost my mother. He was the monster in my nightmares. The monster under the bed and inside my closet. But I was grown now, no longer would I be afraid.
Then my foster father became Mr. Novak. He was the monster, a monster that needed to burn in hell for eternity.
“See, I was right.” Rhett’s voice was distorted by his lips kissing the glass.
“Don’t ever do that again, Rhett.” My rapid breathing slowed, calming my palpitating heart. “You know I don’t like to be in a choke hold.”
How was I sure he knew that? It came out so naturally. I had begun to recall many past memories and being with Rhett was sure to bring back more.
“You know that I know that.” He sounded giddy, but the glass still muffled his voice. “You can let me go now. And I wasn’t going to choke hold you. I wanted to fix your collar.”
I inclined my head. My collar was turned inward, but I didn’t believe him. “You’re lying.” I shoved harder, just to prove that I could.
“I swear. I’ll fist bump swear it.”
Fist bump swear. I blinked from the familiarity of those words. “Fine.” A cackle escaped me. Instead of releasing him, I wanted to play a bit more. After all, he’d kidnapped me again. “But why should I let you go? You shot me with sleeping serum.”
“I didn’t. Ozzie did.”
I contorted my brow, baffled. “Ozzie?”
Rhett had stood behind me, but then I recalled Ozzie leaving his station next to Reyna.
“And you should take a look. We have company.” Rhett’s breath fogged up a section of the glass.
From this position, I had a clear view of the door. I hadn’t made an effort to shift to see who was on the other side of the window.
I slowly craned my neck. Reyna’s eyebrows spiked high with her arms crossed, as if to say, what did you do, Rhett? Ozzie’s jaw dropped. Standing beside them were ... holy cow ... about twenty children. They were all snickering, pointing at Rhett.
Rhett had mentioned children in Hope City, but to actually see them filled me with exuberance. I immediately dropped my hands as if I had been doing something naughty only to be caught by many little people. The youngest looked to be about five and the oldest, perhaps thirteen.
Seeing these children, especially the older ones, reminded me of the kids who had captured Mr. Palmer. I made a mental note to ask about them.
“Children.” I backed away as if they were some kind of anomaly I should be afraid of.
Rhett flexed his jaw and his arm, and then made circles with his shoulders. “They’re sweet, or at least some of them are.”
“Sorry.” My eyes were glued to them until Reyna led them away. I turned to Rhett. “I ... I’m a little bit jumpy.”
“I understand.” Rhett caressed my cheek. “You went back to ISAN with a new truth. And you’re remembering your past. It’s all happening at once. It can’t be easy for you.”
Inhaling Rhett’s scent and soaking in his words, I laid my head on his shoulder with a deep sigh. Breathe in and breathe out. He seemed to be my voice of re
ason, my foundation. This time I would not crumble.
My shattered walls were going back up, brick by brick. They would be stronger. No sticks. No straw. Just bricks.
Rhett kissed my forehead and the world seemed to right itself. “I’m going to fix your collar and then I’ll give you a tour. Please don’t hurt me.”
His shirt muffled my laugh.
After Rhett was done, he placed his chipped hand on the scanner. When the door slid open, he gestured for me to go first. I had a vague idea of what Hope City would look like, but I’d never imagined a place just as ruined as the Abandoned City.
The demolition of the grand building had created a dome-like cavern. Sunlight beamed through the countless cracks in pinpricks. Some solar panels had survived the destruction, providing light in the darker places.
Tents were pitched in neat rows. And toward the far back, where sunlight seemed to be the brightest, chickens roamed a gated pen inside a massive garden.
Haunting. Beautiful. Serene. No words seemed sufficient. I consumed the view and dipped my head bashfully when I noted many staring at me.
“Ava.” Reyna gave me a quick nod and a small smile. “It’s good to see you. I guess this means you are Team Rebel now.”
“It’s good to see you, too. Yes, Team Rebel.”
Those two words sounded silly coming out of my mouth. I had always been Team Ava. ISAN never felt like it was my home or part of me. I’d only stayed because I’d had no choice. And when Brooke and I became friends, I hadn’t wanted to leave her.
I’m coming, Brooke. Hold on.
“Hello, Ava.”
Ozzie kept his distance, but his hint of a smile told me he was happy to see me. Either that, or he was afraid of what I would do to him when I found out he’d been the one to dose me. I still resented he had taken the choice from me, but appreciated he cared enough to want to bring me here.
I could have played with him, made him squirm, but that was Mr. Novak, not me. I let it go and decided not to mention it—at least not right now.
“It’s good to see you, Oz.” I smiled big for him.
Ozzie relaxed his shoulders and rewarded me with a wide but thin-lipped grin.