‘My dress is almost ready.’ I spoke quickly, anxious to avert another row. ‘It will be lovely when it is finished.’
My light prattle served its purpose, and Jonathon returned to his chair.
‘I am sure you will be beautiful,’ he said, smiling, ‘even in that silk.’
Garth gave a secret smile, as if he knew something Jonathon did not, and I would have given anything to know what was going on in his mind at that moment.
He gave me a quick glance and, without another word, left the room. In spite of my resolution to be cold toward him, I could not help feeling a disappointment that cast a gloom over the evening when he did not reappear…
The birds were singing outside my window, and a pale early-morning sun struggled into the room. I became aware that someone was shaking my shoulder, and I turned over, burrowing my head beneath the bedclothes in an effort to cling to the delicious sleepiness that enveloped me.
‘Catherine, wake up; it is a beautiful morning for a ride.’
I pushed back my tangled hair in annoyance to see Garth bending over me, a look of merriment in his eyes.
‘What on earth are you doing?’ I said crossly, struggling into a sitting position. ‘What time is it?’
He placed his hands on my shoulders and drew me toward him, and before I could resist, his lips were on mine and my senses were swimming.
Roughly, I pushed him away. ‘If that’s all you’ve come to my room for, you can leave now.’ My tone was biting, and he raised his eyebrows but immediately moved away from me.
‘I wanted you to come for a ride. The horses are ready and waiting in the stable; it is going to be a beautiful day.’
My head told me I should refuse him, but the temptation to ride with him across the rolling fields was too much for me, and I nodded my head.
‘Give me ten minutes to dress. I won’t be any longer than that, I promise.’
He smiled warmly, and I marvelled at his sudden changes of mood. I would never learn to understand him; perhaps that was part of his attraction.
Lucy must have been waiting outside the landing, because as soon as Garth went out of the door, she was at my side, fussing over my hair.
‘I wish I had the chance to go out on such a morning with a handsome man like Mr Garth,’ she said enviously, and I could not help but agree with her inwardly, although I was determined not to show how pleased I was.
‘My grandmother used to say, “Handsome is as handsome does.”’ I could see the glint of amusement in her eyes and I knew I did not fool Lucy one little bit. She could tell how I felt by the way my hands shook as I drew on my soft green riding habit.
I was ready in less than ten minutes, and Lucy stood back admiringly.
‘You and Mr Garth will make a striking couple, and no mistake.’
I met Jonathon on the stairs and was embarrassed by his thorough appraisal of me.
‘Going riding with Garth, I take it?’ His tone was a little cold, and I nodded quickly.
‘It is such a beautiful day, I could not resist the idea. Why don’t you come along, too?’
To my relief, he shook his head. ‘No, I have other matters to attend to. Go along and enjoy yourself.’
I hurried outside into the chill of the early morning air, and even before I reached the stables, I could hear the ring of horses’ hooves on the cobbles.
My heart lifted in excitement, and I smiled warmly at Garth as he came forward to take my hand.
‘You look magnificent, Catherine,’ he said. ‘Come and see the chestnut mare; I bought her especially for you.’
1 looked up at him sharply to see if he was making a joke, but there was no sign of a smile on his face.
‘Garth, you don’t mean to tell me you have bought an animal just for me?’
He waved his hand impatiently and led me to the docile mare standing patiently at the door of the stables.
With Garth’s help, I swung up into the saddle and patted the rich silk coat of the animal. She moved a little, and I felt excitement sharpen within me. I longed to give her her head and ride like the wind until both the animal and I were exhausted.
Garth brought his black stallion alongside me, and, in the early morning light, he looked every inch the pirate he was reputed to be.
He led the way at a brisk trot, and happily I followed him. The sun was warming as it rose higher in the sky, and the air was sweet like wine, with the faint tang of the sea to give it added spice.
We rode across the fields, and Garth kept to the lowlands, so that we were constantly sheltered from the chill of the winds by the sweeping mountains.
I sighed, feeling happier than I had been since Grandmother’s death. Deep in my heart, I knew the reason was that I was at Garth’s side.
Eventually we came out of the fields and onto the road winding down to the harbour. I could see the tall ships, stranded by the ebbing tide. The new schooner gleamed brighter than the rest, its masts pointing proudly into the sun.
Garth turned and smiled at me. ‘I haven’t forgotten my promise to give you a closer look at your namesake.’ He urged his horse forward, and with some trepidation, I followed him.
When we reached the quay, Garth helped me from the saddle, his hands lingering longer than necessary at my waist. I twisted away from him so that he could not see the colour flooding into my face.
He took my arm, leading me forward, and all around us was the unmistakable scent of the docks.
Tarred ropes grew hot in the rising sun, and the timber stacked along the wharf lent the air a spiciness that I found exhilarating.
Garth put his arm around me, pointing upward to where the figurehead of the Sea Witch looked down as if in disdain at the activity on the docks. There was no mistaking the red curls and the dark eyes; the figure was clearly in my likeness.
The heat came into my cheeks as I perceived the pink thrusting breasts of the figurehead pointing into the wind.
‘Garth, how could you!’ I stared at him in horror. ‘What will the townspeople think of me?’
I put my hands to my cheeks, and Garth flung back his head and laughed.
‘It is a very good likeness, as far as I can tell,’ he said in amusement. ‘And I don’t give a fig what anyone thinks. Why should you?’
‘I do care!’ I said fiercely. ‘I won’t be considered just another of your mistresses!’
‘Worried that your stock will go down in the marriage stakes?’ he said sharply, and I glared at him, longing to strike him.
Instead, I turned my back on him and hurried to where we had left the horses. This was positively the last time I would trust him. He would not make a fool of me again.
I spurred the animal forward and rode as quickly as I could along the road back to the Hall. It was obvious that my cousin had no decent regard for me; otherwise how could he make me look like a fool and a wanton in the eyes of anybody who cared to look at his dratted ship?
I flung back my head, telling myself that I cared not a jot what Garth might think of women in general and me in particular. But there were tears in my eyes and my heart was like a stone as I left the quayside far below me.
Eight
I did not see Garth at breakfast the next morning, nor did he put in an appearance during the rest of the day. By afternoon, I was miserably convinced that he must have put out to sea again.
Pulling on my cloak, I slipped out quietly, hoping that Jonathon would not notice my absence. I did not feel like a lecture on the dangers of walking alone on the cliffs.
I stepped out briskly along the headland, facing the teeth of the easterly wind that had no right to be blowing on an early spring day.
I stopped when the harbour was in sight, and to my relief saw that the ships were still anchored like a huddle of old women, bobbing on the full tide.
I began to smile, picturing again the figurehead flouting convention, poised above the wharf for everyone to see. Only a man like Garth could get away with such a thing. I no longer fe
lt angry about the figurehead; on the contrary, I was strangely touched that my likeness should take pride of place on Garth’s newest ship. If only he had used a little more discretion, I would have been happier.
Suddenly I was laughing uncontrollably. I flung myself down on the coarse grass, feeling the wind tearing at my hair and whipping my skirts into a billowing frenzy. I did not care. I felt alive and light of spirit, and I did not have to look far for the reason. Garth’s ship was still in port.
Suddenly I became aware of the sound of horses’ hooves drumming along the hill track. I was thrown into a panic of embarrassment, wondering whether to make an attempt to tidy myself up a little or to stay where I was and hope I would not be observed.
There was no more time for thought. I crouched behind a rock, feeling more like a fugitive than a respectable young lady.
Rising and falling on the wind, I heard a man’s voice and recognised the rough tones of Daniel Perkins.
‘No, the likes of him do not marry! Not with girls such as my Sarah. I will kill the high and mighty Mr Llewellyn if it is true that he has got my girl into any sort of trouble.’
I could not hear the other man’s reply. I ventured to raise my head and saw Mr Sainsbury, the banker, open his mouth to speak, but the wind changed direction and the words were carried away.
They rode on past without noticing me, and I huddled against the rocks, drawing my skirts around me, feeling suddenly chilled.
Perkins had talked of marriage and trouble, and I thought I knew what he meant. I closed my eyes in anguish, torturing myself with the thought of Garth’s lips pressed against Sarah Perkins’ full, sulky mouth. I had witnessed for myself how passionately familiar he could be, and no doubt he would promise a simple girl like Sarah the moon and the stars if only she would yield to his blandishments.
I wanted to cry, but the tears would not come. There was a hard knot of pain inside me that nothing would dissolve.
‘You are nothing but a fool, Catherine Llewellyn,’ I told myself, as with an effort I drew myself to my feet and slowly retraced my steps to the Hall.
I had firmly made up my mind to avoid further contact with Garth, but my good intentions were in vain. He failed to return home that night, or indeed for several nights thereafter.
Jonathon seemed more at ease in his brother’s absence and freely discussed his ideas for improving Langland Hall. I felt guilty, knowing he was only waiting for me to provide the money so that he could make a start.
I found myself wishing whole-heartedly that I could fall in love with him. He was so uncomplicated and good-humoured.
‘Catherine, I do not believe you have heard one word I have said.’
Jonathon was smiling at me from his high-backed chair near the fire, and with an effort I brought my mind to present events.
‘Forgive me; I am a little tired.’ I made an effort to smile, and he shrugged his shoulders.
‘It does not matter. It was nothing of importance. Perhaps you would like a little wine to settle you.’
‘That would be very nice,’ I said, more to be sociable than because I really wanted any.
He handed me a glass, and I leaned back in my chair and looked up at him.
‘What do you know about Daniel Perkins and his family, Jonathon?’ I asked.
He looked at me sharply. ‘What is there to know? Perkins works for Garth; he has nothing to do with me.
I was a little surprised by the anger in his voice and worried lest he think I was prying into his affairs.
‘I just wondered, that’s all,’ I said quickly. ‘Do you think his daughter Sarah is attractive?’
He smiled and took my hand in his. ‘Not half as attractive as you are, Catherine.’
I looked up at him in all seriousness. ‘In what way am I more attractive than she?’
He smiled broadly. ‘You are fishing for compliments, but I will pay them gladly. You are a silk purse and she is a sow’s ear – that is the difference.’
‘You are too flattering to me, Jonathon.’ I pressed his hand to my cheek, and his fingers were gentle as he smiled down at me.
Suddenly he shuddered, and I looked up at him in surprise, observing his pallor.
‘Why Jonathon, what is wrong? Are you ill?’ The wine sparkled like liquid rubies as he raised it with shaking hands to his lips.
‘It is nothing,’ he said, collapsing into a chair. ‘Just a chill. It will pass.’
He lay back with his eyes closed, and I saw beads of perspiration stand out on his forehead.
‘I will go to bed directly,’ he said, ‘and by morning I shall be quite well again.’ He made an effort to rise, and I pushed him back.
‘Stay still while I make sure your room is warm enough. It would do no good to go to a cold bed.’
With an anxious backward look at him, I let myself out of the room and hurried, candle held high, up the winding staircase to his room.
The heavy curtains were pulled over the windows, and the light from the fire leaped like frenzied creatures on the walls. I set the candle down and shook up the pillows, finding to my satisfaction that the warmers were in place.
‘Well now, what a touching picture!’ I spun around to see Garth leaning against the door frame, watching me, his eyes narrowed. ‘I had no idea you had changed rooms with Jonathon.’ His smile did not seem at all humorous, and his voice was rough.
‘I have not changed rooms. I was merely making sure that all was ready for him to come to bed. He is not well.’
He gripped my arm so fiercely that I almost cried out. It was useless trying to struggle, so I remained still, looking at him defiantly.
‘Were you intending to warm the bed for him, Catherine? Is that one of your duties?’
I glared at him, anger rendering me almost inarticulate, longing to strike him with all my strength.
‘I am not interested in your vulgar opinions,’ I managed to gasp. ‘The trouble with you is that you judge everyone by your own low standards. And where have you been for the last few days? Have you no consideration for the feelings of others?’ He did not answer, and I spoke again impulsively.
‘Perhaps you could help your brother to his room. When I left him, he could barely sit upright in his chair.’
Together we managed to get Jonathon to his room. He was trembling as if possessed by the ague, and I did not like the colour of his face.
‘If he does not improve by morning, I shall ride into town and bring the doctor to him.’ Garth sounded brisk and not unduly worried.
‘Has he been like this before?’ I asked, watching him carefully. He did not answer my question, but rang the bell, and after a few minutes Lucy came hurrying into the room.
‘Oh dear,’ she said quickly. ‘Shall I bring some hot brandy and more warmers for the bed?’
Garth nodded and covered his brother with the blankets. ‘It is nothing. He will recover in a day or two.’
He took my arm and led me outside onto the landing, closing the door carefully behind him. ‘Let him sleep it off. He needs peace and quiet more than anything.’
I was bewildered by the calm way the entire household seemed to be taking Jonathon’s indisposition. He had looked almost grey, his hands trembling, and he had been perspiring like a frightened horse.
‘Surely you should bring the doctor tonight?’ I asked anxiously, but Garth shook his head.
‘No,’ he said deliberately. ‘Please allow me to know more about my brother than you do, Catherine.’
‘Why are you so obstinate?’ I asked furiously. ‘Anyone can see that Jonathon is ill!’
‘Some people cannot see what is beneath their noses,’ he said drily, and I stared at him in bewilderment.
He stepped forward and took me in his arms, drawing me close to him, holding me so tightly I could scarcely breathe.
‘Your eyes are like jet when you are angry,’ he said, smiling a little. ‘And right now there are violet shadows beneath them. Have you suffered a few restless ni
ghts since I went away?’
Summoning all my strength, I pushed him away from me, furious at his attitude. ‘I think I hate you,’ I said fiercely. ‘I’m warning you, I do not intend to be trifled with any longer.’
He bowed mockingly and turned to go, and the perverse weak creature inside me longed to call out and bring him back.
‘You know you do not hate me,’ he said calmly. ‘On the contrary, you find me irresistible.’
I had no means of knowing whether he spoke in earnest or jest, but anger lent an edge to my voice.
‘Barbarian!’ I cried, losing my dignity altogether. ‘You will drive me too far one day.’
Lucy appeared on the landing, a bewildered expression on her face, and, shamed to the very core of my being, I covered my face with my hands.
‘There, there, Miss Catherine,’ she said softly, ‘Come to your room, and I will make you a cup of strong tea. And don’t you worry about Master Jonathon; he will be recovered by morning, you’ll see.
The tea was hot and refreshing, and soon I managed to smile at Lucy.
‘Thank you so much,’ I said warmly. ‘My silly outburst was inexcusable. I must be more upset than I realised.’
‘That’s all right, miss,’ she said, her hands busy folding fresh linen away in the tall chest of drawers. ‘You should not take too much notice of Master Garth. He has a wicked way of teasing folk. He means no harm by it.’ She glanced at me, and I could tell by the way her eyes shone that she too was under Garth’s spell.
When she left me, I tried to settle down to sleep, but it was no use. My mind turned over and over, thinking first of Jonathon’s grey, drawn face and then of the hard, rather impatient way his brother had dealt with him. One thing was clear: Jonathon was given to these sudden, bewildering bouts of illness. Why else should the matter be taken so calmly?
Restlessly I turned over on my side, my eyes drawn to the flickering fire. I felt again the pressure of Garth’s lips and the strength of his arms around me, and against my will I trembled with remembered delight.
What was it about my cousin that turned my blood to water in this silly way? The best thing to do was to forget him, put him right out of my mind; otherwise there would be no peace for me.
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