Perhaps it would be better for me to go away from the Hall, start a new life on my own. I had enough money to support myself for some time to come.
Even as the thought came, I rejected it. I could no longer imagine a lifetime spent apart from Garth, even though I knew he was a womaniser and probably worse.
I stood up restlessly. I had promised Garth I would stay indoors, but I longed to be free, to walk out onto the headland in the teeth of the wind and watch the breakers curl, only to dash themselves into a thousand pieces against the jagged rocks.
I forced myself to walk to the bookcase and choose something that would hold my interest. For once I would obey Garth and be sensible.
Determinedly, I seated myself in a comfortable chair and turned the pages. But after only a few moments, the book had fallen into my lap and my thoughts were spinning around in my head like rats in a trap.
Later, in the middle of the afternoon, Jonathon came downstairs, obviously recovered from his illness, a smile on his face as he came to my side.
‘Are you feeling better?’ I asked nervously, and his eyebrows shot up in amazement.
‘I feel fine, on top of the world. Why do you ask?’
I shrugged helplessly. It was clear that he remembered nothing about the events of the morning.
He took my hand in his. ‘You are so solicitous, Catherine,’ he said. ‘When are you going to become my wife?’
I pulled away from him, startled. I knew I had been wrong ever to let him think I could marry him.
‘I cannot marry you!’ I said vehemently, and something flashed for a moment into his eyes, a look that took me by surprise so that I recoiled.
‘I’m sorry,’ I said more quietly. ‘I should never have allowed you to think that I would become your wife.’
He stared at me coldly, and his hands shook as they rested on the arms of his chair.
‘Very well, Catherine, I will not ask you again,’ he said, and his voice was almost devoid of expression. Suddenly I was afraid.
‘I do not mean to hurt you, Jonathon,’ I said quickly. ‘It is just that I realise I do not love you the way a wife should love her husband.’
He stared over my head. ‘You love Garth,’ he said in the same flat voice. ‘He always manages to take everything I want.’
‘You have the Hall,’ I said gently, knowing how much he loved the fine old building. But even in that assumption I was wrong.
‘Oh yes,’ he said. ‘I have the Hall. It eats up money; it is like a living monster devouring me.’
I rose to my feet, making an effort to keep some semblance of composure.
‘Jonathon, you have not been well. Perhaps if you rested in your room for a while, you would feel better.’ He slumped forward suddenly, his head on his arms in a childish gesture that moved me strangely. But one thing was certain. However much I might pity Jonathon, I would never marry him.
Thirteen
To my amazement, Jonathon had decided to go ahead with the arrangements for the dinner party. He politely asked me to go down to the kitchens and inform Cook that she should use her best, most elaborate recipes.
There was an odd look on her broad face as she listened to me, and when I lapsed into silence she merely nodded her head, pursing her lips as she returned to her cooking.
‘Is there anything wrong, Cook?’ I asked shakily, and she shrugged her round shoulders.
‘It isn’t for the likes of me to say anything, but Mr Jonathon is asking for trouble, that’s what I say.’
There seemed nothing further to add, and I retraced my steps up the wooden staircase.
Jonathon was obviously waiting for my report. ‘I gave Cook your instructions,’ I said, avoiding his eyes. ‘But she didn’t seem too happy about it.’
‘She is not here to be happy,’ he said shortly. ‘She must do as she is told.’
‘Jonathon,’ I said tentatively, ‘don’t you think it would be better to postpone the party, for a little while at least?’
‘Nonsense!’ he exclaimed. ‘Why should I? It is not me the townspeople are angry with.’
He sat down at his desk and drew some papers toward him, turning his back on me as though the matter were settled.
I stared out of the window, longing to take a walk along the headland, but the rain was streaming down the windows, and the wind howled around the corners of the building like a stricken animal.
I moved to the fireplace, my nerves on edge, and Jonathon frowned at me.
‘Can you not find something with which to occupy yourself?’ he said not unkindly. And like a drowning man, I clutched at straws.
‘I will go up to my room,’ I said quickly, and before he had time to make any protest, I hurriedly left him, feeling suddenly released.
Lucy had just built up the fire. She rose to her feet, smiling at me, a streak of dust across her face.
‘Oh, miss, you did give me a fright!’ she said. ‘I thought some restless spirit had come to haunt me when I heard the rattle of the doorknob.’
I smiled. ‘I’m a restless spirit all right,’ I said, ‘but one very much of this world and glad of a good fire on a day like this.’
Lucy winked. ‘I expect you could drink a cup of tea if I made one, couldn’t you?’ She moved to the door. ‘I might even get Cook to give you some of her fruit cake.’
‘That would certainly be nice, Lucy.’ I sank onto the bed. ‘It was kind of you to think of it.’
I pulled a chair up to the fire and sat with my feet on the brass fender, listening to the rain dashing with frenzy against the small panes of the windows. It was a good thing that Garth was working at the docks and not out at sea; otherwise I would not have had a moment’s peace for worrying about him.
A coal dropped from the grate, and a flutter of paper caught my attention. I leaned forward and saw that it was part of a letter, browned by the heat but still readable. It said:
‘To my precious son, Jonathon, I leave the residue of—’ The rest of the words were too charred to be legible. I turned the paper over, wondering where it had come from. Suddenly I thought of the box of papers under my bed and scrambled down onto my knees, knowing before I looked what I should find. I was right. The box was empty; my hiding place had not turned out to be a very secure one.
When Lucy returned with my tea, I searched in my mind for a way to interrogate her about the papers and at last came right out with the question.
‘Lucy, did you move some papers from under my bed?’ I asked, and she turned to me quickly.
‘Yes, I did, miss. They were some things that Master Garth wanted me to burn. Was there anything there you wanted, then?’
I shook my head. ‘No, not really. They didn’t belong to me; I had no right to keep them.’
She placed the tray before me, smiling as she held out a plate heaped with fruit cake.
‘I told you before that Cook liked you, didn’t I, Miss Catherine?’ She looked triumphant. ‘This is some of her special cooking; you’re very honoured.’ She laughed wickedly. ‘Cook can be a regular vixen if she chooses to be, but she is good to them she likes, I’ll say that for her.’
‘Give her my thanks, Lucy,’ I said. ‘Won’t you stop and share my tea? I’ll never get through it all alone.’
‘Love you, miss, I’ve got my work to finish!’ Lucy said with good-humoured reproof in her voice. ‘I’ve got to hurry back to the kitchens at once, or I’ll be in for it.’
It was miserable sitting alone in my room, but anything was preferable to spending my time in Jonathon’s company. I leaned back against the curve of the chair and closed my eyes. So suddenly that I jumped guiltily, there was a loud rapping on my door.
‘Come in,’ I said in a voice scarcely above a whisper. To my great relief, it was Garth who opened the door.
‘Why are you shut away in your room?’ he asked in concern. ‘Are you not well?’
‘I’m quite all right,’ I said quickly. ‘Would you like some tea? Lucy just brought me
some.’
He sat down and stared at me, a little bewildered by my attitude.
‘You are definitely not yourself, Catherine,’ he said, staring at me with unblinking eyes. ‘Perhaps you should go away from the Hall for a little while. I’m sure you would benefit from a change of scenery.’
Even though he was voicing a thought that had been mine only a short time before, I felt suddenly angry.
‘You want me out of the way, is that it?’ My tone was sharp, and he looked at me in surprise.
‘Catherine, believe it or not, I am only thinking of you.’ His tone was gentle. ‘It could be that you are in danger here.’
‘Oh, that is rubbish and you know it!’ I said. ‘What on earth has given you that idea? Is it just because of that bunch of thugs who waylaid me outside the town?’
He shook his head. ‘Not just that, Catherine.’ He brushed his fingers through his hair. ‘I can’t explain. Won’t you take my word for it?’
‘Why should I take your word for anything?’ I was so angry I could have hit him.
He reached out suddenly and drew me to him, and before I could move, his lips were on mine, warm and demanding, drawing every ounce of strength from me.
He released me as suddenly as he had held me, and I could think of nothing to say. He took my hand, his expression difficult to read.
‘Catherine, I will have to go away again quite soon, and I am reluctant to leave you alone.’
I stared at him foolishly, trying hard to regain my wits.
‘But I won’t be alone,’ I said. ‘Jonathon will be here.’
He shrugged. ‘Yes, Jonathon will be here.’ He looked out at the driving rain for a moment.
‘You must always be on your guard, Catherine,’ he said. ‘Will you promise me not to do anything foolish?’
As I nodded, he moved toward the door, a frown still between his eyebrows.
‘I will try to make this trip a short one,’ he said. ‘I’ll be back before you know it.’
‘Thank you for your concern,’ I said formally. ‘When will you be leaving?’
He shook his head. ‘Not for a few days; it all depends, really.’ He didn’t say on what, and there seemed little point in asking him. There was one thing I could clear up, however.
‘Garth, did you tell Lucy to burn the papers that were here?’
He looked me full in the face so that I felt a little uncomfortable under his uncompromising stare.
‘Yes, Catherine, I did. They were none of your business. Did you read any of them?’
I shook my head. ‘No; I must confess that I had little opportunity. I would have read them, had they still been here today.’
He nodded. ‘Very well then; forget all about them. Pretend they never existed.’ He smiled. ‘The portrait you may keep.’
‘Thank you,’ I said, genuinely pleased. ‘I’m sure, from the quality of the brushwork and the delicate use of colour, that the painting must be of some value.’
He shrugged. ‘It is of no use to me. If it gives you pleasure, you are welcome to it.’
He opened the door then. ‘I’ll leave you to rest, Catherine. Perhaps if you stay in your room for a time, I can have a private word with my brother.’
The door closed behind him, and all the warmth I had felt when Garth gave me the portrait was dispelled by his curt request that I keep out of the way. I sank down in my chair and closed my eyes. Would I ever understand the undercurrents that seeped like dangerous mists into the very walls of Langland Hall?
The day of the party dawned clear and bright. I was awake early, heartened to see that the beating rain and high winds had given way to soft, spring-like sunshine;
I hurried down to the kitchens as soon as I was dressed. Cook was already busy over the ovens, and the delicious smell of baking bread made my mouth water.
‘Are you managing all right?’ I asked, stepping quickly out of her way as she brought a steaming tray over to the table.
‘I manage better on my own,’ she said with a twinkle in her eyes.
Taking the hint, I retreated back upstairs and decided to take a short walk around the gardens. It was good to see the cloudless sky above the changing blue of the sea, and I breathed deeply of the warm air.
Jonathon joined me in the garden. He seemed in excellent spirits, his bright hair hanging over his forehead so that he looked little more than a boy.
‘You must have picked the weather out yourself!’ I smiled up at him, and he took my arm. ‘I hope it will be a very good party.’
‘It will be the best,’ he said with conviction. ‘You will like the Doctor and his wife, I’m sure, and Mr Sainsbury, of course you know.’ He tipped back his head and stared up at the sky.
‘The schoolteacher is a bit of a dry stick, but his wife makes up for him; she is very witty. Yes, I think it will be a memorable evening.’
Suddenly Garth’s voice broke the silence of the morning.
‘Jonathon,’ he called, ‘would you come inside for a moment? There is something I wish to discuss with you.’
I felt Jonathon stiffen. ‘You would think he was calling to his hounds,’ he said in a fury. ‘I will not be spoken to in that way.’
He hurried across the grass, and after a moment I heard the two brothers arguing heatedly with each other. I sighed. Would they never learn to act like grown men?
I made up my mind that I would keep well out of the way of both of them during the day. Perhaps the party would put them in a better mood.
The day passed slowly, but at last it was time for me to go upstairs and dress. Lucy came to pin up my hair, and when I stepped into the blue gown, the result surprised even me.
‘Oh, Miss Catherine!’ Lucy said, standing back to see me the better. ‘You look like a princess, you really do.’
I laughed at Lucy’s generous praise, but all the same I was delighted by the way the gown clung to me in all the right places, the changing blue of the silk complementing the colour of my hair.
‘Every man in the room will fall in love with you,’ Lucy breathed romantically, and I giggled.
‘I hope not, or I’ll have some irate wives to deal with! All I want is a peaceful life.’
To my surprise, Jonathon was waiting at the foot of the stairs for me, his eyes alight as he watched my descent.
‘Perfect,’ he said. ‘You look every inch the lady of the manor. Won’t you think again about becoming my wife?’
I put my hand on his arm. ‘Jonathon, we have no time to discuss our private affairs.’ I smiled in what I hoped was a kindly way. ‘We must be ready to greet our guests.’
The dining room was beautiful. Lights from the candles flickered onto the silverware and turned the crystal glass into sparkling diamonds. Whatever else the townspeople might think of us, they would know we kept a good table at the Hall.
The guests arrived together, no doubt having joined company on the dark road to the Hall. The ladies were a little distant, but the menfolk talked loudly and jovially, so that there were no uncomfortable silences.
The doctor’s wife appraised my gown with sharp eyes as we took our places at the table. No doubt she was searching for evidence of the wantonness that she had probably been led to expect from me.
I looked across at Garth, who was deep in conversation with Mr Sainsbury, his dark head bent forward. He looked extremely handsome, and my heart skipped a beat as he looked up and our eyes met.
‘Mr Llewellyn is a fine-looking man.’ The doctor’s wife spoke quietly at my side, voicing my own thoughts, and the telltale colour rose to my cheeks.
‘Yes, he is. Both my cousins are handsome, don’t you think?’ I said cautiously.
Her eyes were speculative, as if she were considering the possibility of Jonathon being my lover as well as Garth.
Without any warning, the door burst open and Daniel Perkins stood on the threshold of the room, gripping the arm of his white-faced daughter.
In the sudden silence, my eyes were drawn t
o Sarah’s gown. It was an exact replica of mine, made of the same shimmering silk, and suddenly I felt ill.
Garth rose to his feet. ‘Have you any business you wish to discuss with me, Perkins?’ His voice was like ice. ‘If so, we shall retire to the study and leave our guests in peace.’
Perkins smiled unpleasantly. ‘It would suit you very well to hustle me out of the way, wouldn’t it?’
‘I don’t know what you mean,’ Garth said with composure, looking to where Jonathon, white of face, was leaning on the table as if for support.
Perkins drew Sarah into the centre of the room. She looked around at the assembled guests, a defiant tilt to her head.
‘Tell these fine people what you have told me this night, miss; go on before I whip you!’
He pulled at his daughter’s arm, and I felt sorry for her. She looked mutely at him, shaking her head. He raised his hand, but Garth spoke sharply.
‘I’ll have none of that here, Perkins! Lay a hand on the girl, and you’ll have me to answer to.’
‘All right!’ Perkins shouted. ‘If the slut won’t talk, then I will.’ He spun around to face me, and I remained frozen in my chair, quite unable to move.
‘You are the one that’s caused all the trouble!’ he said venomously, and I stared at him in astonishment. ‘You are supposed to be Llewellyn’s woman, yet you let him make a fool of a simple girl like my Sarah.’ He stared at Garth once more.
‘Don’t pretend you are innocent. My daughter is going to have your child!’ He threw Sarah a contemptuous look.
‘She didn’t know it, but I had my suspicions weeks ago. Well, Mr Llewellyn, what do you say to that?’
Garth turned to the guests. ‘In the circumstances, perhaps it would be better for us to meet some other time. My apologies to you all.’
There was no alternative but for the guests to take a decent departure, though I could see that the doctor’s wife was agog with curiosity. No doubt the tale would be all over the town by morning.
Suddenly the room was cleared, and Sarah burst into hysterical tears.
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