If Ty accidently rubbed against Tess’s arm one more time, Clancy swore he would kill the man. As he watched the couple about thirty feet away, heat built beneath the collar of his plaid western shirt, shooting sparks of jealousy up his neck. Ty’s attention made her squirm where she sat at a picnic table. Several times she had discreetly removed his arm from around her shoulders, but that was Ty. The cowboy was a rogue to the nth degree.
He tried to ignore them. Tried to keep his mind off the woman who had preoccupied his thoughts while he tended to things in Amarillo.
For the time being, Milo had custody of Julie. It didn’t help his ex’s cause when she threatened to take the child out of the country in front of the judge. Clancy had testified that Milo had the means and home to take care of Julie, which meant he’d moved them both into the main house. It would be that way until other arrangements could be made. In all honesty, there was something nice about having a child in the house.
“Move over.” Jessie took a seat next to him on a picnic bench. She remained silent, only the music of a four-piece country western band played while his head spun with the events of the last week.
“So are you going to just sit here and stare at her or are you going to make your move?” Jessie was never good at beating around the bush.
Clancy glanced down at the half-eaten corncob sitting on his plate. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.” He picked up his fork and chased a pork and bean around the succulent beef he had yet to try, the rich brown-sugar scent filling his nose.
“Bullshit.” She choked, and then she laughed. “Clancy. Clancy. Clancy. When will you learn not to lie to me? Who knows you better than me?”
Setting his fork down, he raised his head so that their eyes met. “No one.” She knew him almost as well as he knew himself.
“Exactly.” She paused, her voice softening. “You only pull away from people you care about. The second you get interested in a woman you haul ass.” He followed her line of sight, which led straight to Tess. “And you’re interested or you wouldn’t be trying to ignore her so thoroughly. She’s nice. Intelligent. Beautiful. Did I say nice?”
“Yeah. So?” There was no use in denying it. He tugged his Stetson a little lower over his eyes.
“Have you noticed how she looks at you when she doesn’t think you’re aware?”
No he hadn’t, because he’d been too busy trying to ignore her. “That doesn’t change the circumstances.”
“And exactly what are those circumstances?” Her voice grew taut.
“You know damn well what they are.”
Jessie released a pent-up breath. “You are hardheaded. That was your dad’s—your family’s—history, not yours. Clancy, when are you going to pull your head out of your ass and realize that you’re a good man—a gentle man? A man who deserves to love and be loved in return.” She shot off the bench. “You know, screw this. Let the best thing that has walked into your life pass you by.” Then an expression of regret fell across her face. “I’m sorry.” She hugged his neck. “I just worry about you.”
“You don’t have to worry about me.” He patted her arm. “I’m happy, Jessie.”
Broken laughter spilled from her lips as she released him and flicked the brim of his hat with her fingers. “Sure you are, buddy. About as happy as I was before Wade forced me to wake up and smell the roses. Don’t forget to whom you’re talking to. Remember we were cut from the same piece of cloth. I know what you’re thinking, but you’d never hurt a woman, especially one you cared about. So get off your ass and go claim what you want, before Ty sweet talks her away.”
“Jessie, you don’t understand.” No one understood the demons inside him.
She squeezed his arm. “I understand a helluva lot more than you think. But if you’re all right with Ty sweeping her off her feet and maybe eliciting Guy Sandoval to take your place in a threesome, so be it.”
Guy Sandoval? A friend and attorney for the Peterson family and a Spanish Casanova who had cut a path through more women than even Clancy had thought about?
No fuckin’ way. A growl rumbled deep in his throat.
When he raised his gaze to meet Jessie’s, she wore a shit-eating grin. “Just what I thought,” she purred with delight. “You don’t want Guy touching your woman, much less Ty. Am I right? Tell me I’m wrong.”
“You know, Jessie, sometimes you can be a little bitch.”
“Yeah, but you still love me.” She planted a kiss on his cheek. “Now stop brooding and let Tess know how you feel about her.”
“Hmmm. No can do. She’s already made it clear that she doesn’t need a cowboy like me to muddy her reputation.” And who could blame her?
“Really, Clancy?” Jessie released a heavy breath. “I’ve seen you charm the pants off the most frigid of cowgirls, so don’t tell me this is different.”
But it was different. Tess was different. And his emotions were different.
“Ohhhh… Lookie,” Jessie cooed.
Clancy once again followed her line of sight. Ty and Tess were rising from where they sat.
“If I know Ty, he’s attempting to get her into the barn. Alone.” Jessie let an ominous note hang on her last word. “You remember that barn, don’t you, Clancy? All those stalls a couple could get lost in.”
“It won’t work, Jessie. I’m not jealous.” The hell he wasn’t. Just the thought of Tess in Ty’s arms sent an army of fire ants stinging their way over his skin. He twitched, but didn’t get up.
“Oh. Okay.” Her eyes widened with false belief that he knew hid behind those scheming, blue eyes. “I guess I’ll join my husband. Maybe make him take me for a spin across the dance floor.” She waved her fingers at Clancy. “Have fun.” And then she was gone.
Thankfully, the barn hadn’t been what Ty had in mind. No, the damn cowboy had chosen just the right slow dance to get Tess in his arms.
Begrudgingly, Clancy watched them. Sometime between the beginning and middle of the song, Clancy realized she had danced away with his heart. He wanted this woman. Getting to his feet, he moved closer. By the time the song ended, he was near enough to tap Ty on the shoulder, but it wasn’t to be.
Tori and a handful of her girlfriends raced up to Tess. “Shelby says you’re the choirmaster at her school. Will you sing for us? Please.”
Tess’s cheeks reddened. “I shouldn’t—can’t. I mean—”
“Please.” Tori’s friends joined her pleas.
“I’d like to hear you sing.” Clancy caught Tess’s attention, swearing he could hear her heart beating rapidly, but it was his own. She did this to him.
“Okay,” she whispered.
Tori and her friends squealed, as she grabbed Tess’s hand and led her to where the band was. The lead singer of the group was Austin Anderson. He spoke briefly with Tess and then he nodded at his keyboard player. The tinkling of the ivory keys joined by the drummer, and then the guitarist, announced the song was Lady Antebellum’s Need You Now.
The first line of the song came out of Tess’s mouth as smooth as Tennessee whiskey. He had never heard a voice so beautiful, so arousing. When she sang the lyrics about her ever crossing his mind, she looked right at him, setting his pulse racing.
When Austin joined her in the chorus, she turned toward him. The man’s rich voice complemented hers as if they had been singing together for a lifetime. But it was her tone, the way her body swayed to the music, that captivated Clancy. Each tender expression threw a net over the audience, reeling them in hook, line and sinker. They were spellbound and that included Clancy.
By the time the music died, he felt like one big knot of emotion. Jessie was right. He’d never felt this way about a woman. Yet he had known that from the second he had looked into Tess’s eyes that rainy night—he would never be the same. She was an angel—his angel—and he needed her more than he needed to breathe. Which wasn’t all that easy when a herd of cowboys stampeded her direction.
“What the hell?” he grumbled
, making his way through the crowd. As he neared, her laughter stroked his ears. “Levi wants to see you.” He grabbed her hand and quickly maneuvered her away from the fold.
“Is he okay?” Concern darkened her eyes, her footsteps hastening.
Clancy nodded in the direction where Levi stood surrounded by at least five teenage girls. “He’s more than okay.” The young buck glanced at them, grinning like a fool.
She twisted her head, continuing to watch her brother as they passed by him. “Is he ready to go?”
“No.” Clancy guided her farther away from the throng.
“If he wanted me, why are we going the opposite direction?”
As Clancy whisked her through the open barn door, he announced, “Because I lied.”
“Lied? I don’t understand.”
Maybe she would understand this. Clancy pressed her against the wall, his body covering hers, before he captured her mouth with an urgency he couldn’t control.
She released a small cry of surprise, but her lips softened against his, parting when he nudged the seam with his tongue. Hands trembling, he cupped the nape of her neck and angled his head to deepen the kiss, devouring her mouth like a starving man. When he released her to take a breath, she whimpered with something close to disappointment.
“I want you,” he groaned.
She put her lips to his mouth and murmured, “We can’t.” Even as she spoke, she tugged his shirttail up, caressing her hands beneath the long-sleeved cotton shirt. Her warm touch sent a million chills across his pebbling skin, alerting his senses. He could hear her labored breathing. Smell her sweet perfume mixing with the aroma of horses, hay and oats.
He pressed his forehead to hers. “Darlin’, you’re saying one thing, while your hands are speaking a completely different language.”
Tess froze. Her fingers curled into fists against his back. “It doesn’t matter what I want. We can’t do this ever again.”
“Don’t tell me it doesn’t matter, because it matters to me. Do you have any idea what it’s like to be around you and not touch you? It’s killing me.” He shook with the declaration, leaving him feeling raw and exposed.
“I want you too, but—” She wet her lips. “Maybe we could—” she swallowed hard before continuing, “—keep this thing between us quiet.”
Every muscle and tendon in his body stiffened. Any other time her suggestion would be exactly what Clancy desired. But this was a huge leap of faith he was taking. He was putting himself out there and he needed the same commitment from her.
“I don’t want to be your dirty, little secret. Nor do I want to share you. Tess, I want to see where this thing between us leads, but either we’re in a relationship or we’re not. You can’t have it both ways. It’s your choice.”
Chapter Fourteen
Her dirty, little secret?
At the time Tess made the hasty suggestion to continue their affair, but keep it on the down low, she hadn’t realized how obtuse it had sounded. Hell. If she had been in Clancy’s place, she’d have been insulted, even pissed. Instead he looked crestfallen, hurt.
“I’m so sorry.” She flattened her fisted hands on his back, loving the feel of his skin beneath her palms, as she pulled him closer. “It’s just that my decisions are not my own. They affect my family.”
He dipped a finger beneath her chin, forcing her to meet his gaze. “I know I’m not the kind of man you envisioned in your life, but I won’t sulk in the shadows—”
Even for you, she heard his unspoken words. When he stepped out of her arms, she knew he had meant what he had said earlier. She couldn’t have it both ways, and who could blame him? Not her.
Still, she had to make him understand. “It’s complicated—”
“Dammit, Tess.” He whipped off his hat and brushed his hand over his head. “Don’t you think I know it’s complicated? No one knows complicated like me.” His eyes hardened. “I don’t want to just fuck you. I want to see where this thing between us is going.”
“I’m sorry,” she murmured again, feeling her heart sink.
He sat his hat back on his head, tugging the rim low over his eyes. “We better get back to the crowd before someone realizes you’re with me.” She flinched at the coldness in his tone as he tucked his shirttails in his jeans. His expression wasn’t much better when he pivoted. Before she could say anything, he slipped through the door, leaving her behind.
Tess half expected Clancy to not be outside, waiting, when she exited. But he leaned against the side of the barn, pushing away from it when she stepped beside him. In silence they walked back toward the party.
Shelby ran up to Tess, out of breath. “Miss Gilmore,” she gasped. “I’ve been looking for you.”
Clancy paused, a chill rolling off him that Tess felt bone deep. “Perhaps tomorrow would be a better day to tour my ranch. Say about ten.” He didn’t wait for an answer. Instead he tipped his hat and walked away.
Only when Shelby began to speak again, did Tess tear her gaze off of him. “Tori said the band wants you to sing with them again.”
“Ah, honey, I’m not in the mood.”
Tess glanced over the child’s head to see Clancy join a group of cowboys tapping off a beer keg. A tall, slender man slapped him on the back, before handing him a plastic cup half filled with foam. When a petite, dark-haired woman flung her arms around Clancy’s neck, hugging him, Tess’s breath caught.
“B-besides, it’s time for us to leave.” She had to get out of there.
“Leave?” Jessie approached from behind them. “You can’t leave now. The party is just getting started.”
Tears beckoned, but Tess held on to them. “My sisters should be getting home soon. I need to cook supper. Feed the stock.” Throw myself on top of my bed and cry my eyes out, because I let the only man I’ve ever wanted slip through my fingers.
“We can send some of the boys to feed the stock and pick up the girls. As you can see, we didn’t make a dent in the food.” Sure enough, a good portion of the slab of beef still remained rotating slowly on the spit over a dying fire.
When Tess saw the woman who hung on Clancy drag him out on the makeshift dance floor, Tess gasped, and then she cursed her inability to hold on to her control.
Jessie frowned, her voice lowering. “Shelby, go fetch Miss Gilmore’s brother.” Her concern bled through, but she didn’t comment. As her sister ran off, she linked her arm through Tess’s and cast her a wary smile. “Madeline, Wade’s mother, made her famous strawberry-rhubarb pie. It’s to die for.”
“But—”
“It won’t do you any good to argue with her.” Wade sat alone atop a picnic table nursing a glass of whiskey. The ice clinked against the sides as he sat it down. Then the handsome cowboy winked at his wife. “I learned a long time ago just to give her what she wants.”
“Pshhh.” Jessie brushed him off with a hand through the air. “Ignore the silly man. I think a little girl talk is in order.”
Oh God no. The last thing Tess wanted to do was talk. “Thank you for the invitation, but we really should go.” The words came out a little desperate.
Shelby came skipping up to them.
Tess scanned the horizon for her brother. “Where’s Levi?”
“He left.”
“Left?” A wave of panic tightened her throat and threatened to squeeze the air out of her lungs.
“Yep. Said he’d feed the stock, pick up Rose and Rachel and bring them back to the party.”
If Jessie noticed Tess’s inability to breathe she didn’t let on. Instead, she squeezed Tess’s arm. “There. Everything is settled. Why don’t we find a nice quiet spot and chat. Wade, how about grabbing us a couple of drinks? Beer okay with you?”
Tess quietly nodded, while the sensation of being trapped closed in on her. It seemed the entire world was conspiring against her. She tried not to look at the dance floor, but the need was like a drug in her system pulling her gaze toward it.
Clancy and the woman
in his arms moved as if they were one. Each step and executed turn one of precision, as if they knew what move the next one would take before it happened. When he smiled down upon the rare beauty, Tess died a little more inside.
Jessie steered her away, forcing Tess to take her eyes off of the couple. “You know, sometimes the things we think aren’t good for us are exactly what we need.” She stopped beneath a large oak tree, where a white wrought iron table and two chairs sat. “Have a seat.” Releasing Tess’s arm, she pulled out a chair and sat down. “You know he’s a good man.”
Tess didn’t pretend to not know whom she referred to, choosing instead not to respond.
“His life hasn’t been easy.” Jessie hesitated as if she sought the right words. “He’d kill me if he knew I was divulging his secrets, but he cares for you and I would hate to see him screw this up.”
Ironic laughter spilled for Tess’s lips earning her a frown from the woman sitting across from her. “It’s not him. It’s me. My situation. Since my parents died, I have guardianship of my brother and sisters. My choices aren’t my own. I have to protect them. My job.”
“I see. How old are your sisters?”
“Fifteen going on thirty.”
Jessie chuckled. “Sounds like Shelby. But what about you? What do you want? Need?”
Clancy’s name whispered through her head. “What I want or need doesn’t matter. I have to do what is good for my family.”
“And Clancy’s notorious reputation isn’t.” It wasn’t a question, but a statement. Jessie leaned back in her seat. “Well, if you’ve heard those rumors, then I’m sure you know about Clancy, me and Wade.”
With the mention of her husband’s name he approached with two beers in hand. Without a word, he set the drinks down, kissed Jessie softly on the cheek, and then he turned and walked away.
Jessie picked up her beer and took a sip. “Funny how preconceived notions of right and wrong screw with our lives. Honestly, I can’t say I regret anything between us.” She looked away wistfully, tipping the cup up to her mouth again. “The ol’ hussies around here will talk, gossip, but in the end it has to be your decision. I can’t tell you what is right for you, but I can say that Clancy is worth fighting for. You won’t find a more caring, loving man. Even if he doesn’t see himself in that light. Did you know he donated all the playground equipment at Shelby’s school? What kind of man does that?” She paused, her hard gaze fixed on Tess. “He needs a woman like you to complete him. To show him he’s a man worthy of love.”
Bound by an Angel Page 13