“I’m not interested in any of that,” I said. “There’s no one who could hold up to Walter.”
“You knew him such a short time,” Theo said softly. “Don’t you think it’s time to move on?”
“I’ve moved on.” I prickled with defensiveness. “I have my work.”
“You don’t appear to have moved on.” Flynn spoke in his gentlest tone, which softened me somewhat.
“What am I supposed to act like? Running after every eligible man in town? Acting silly and ridiculous? I had true love, and now I’m going to devote myself to my work.”
Theo cocked his head to the side, obviously trying to soften what came next. “Two weeks doesn’t seem like enough time to know if you love someone or not.”
“They were the best two weeks of my life.” I stopped talking, afraid I would start to cry. “He was just everything I ever wanted. Smart and funny. He made me laugh, and you know how I barely have a sense of humor.”
“Not true,” Flynn said. “You’ve been laughing at me my whole life.”
“At you, brother, is different from with you,” Theo said.
“We would be married now if he hadn’t died,” I said, ignoring their obvious effort to make me smile.
“But Jo, he didn’t formally propose,” Flynn said. “Or ask Papa.”
“We didn’t like that,” Theo said.
“Not one bit,” Flynn said.
“He would have, but he had to report for duty.” A gnawing shadow of doubt niggled at me. Not just at the moment, but in the middle of the night when I lay awake staring at the ceiling. I would never admit it to anyone that his lack of steady correspondence hurt. One time I’d snapped at poor Martha when she asked me about how unequal it seemed to be. I knew she was only expressing concern, but it bothered me. Still, who knew what it was like over there, gunshots and tunnels? I couldn’t expect him to have sat around writing to me all day. Perhaps he hadn’t wanted to scare me. Which, as it turned out, I should have been more afraid. I’d been so certain he would return.
“Papa didn’t want you to marry him,” Flynn said.
“Why would you say that?” I stared at him, shocked.
“He said in his letters to us that he thought you were worried about becoming an old maid, which made you susceptible to his charms. All the girls in your circle were getting married and you weren’t.”
I huffed as I crossed my arms over my chest. “That’s ridiculous. I wasn’t worried about getting married. Not at all.” This was a blatant lie. When Martha had married Dr. Neal and then Elsa had married the dentist she’d met in Denver, I was terribly jealous. The weddings had been such fun. They’d been beautiful brides, and I’d looked around the garden and wondered when it would be my turn. “Anyway, it doesn’t matter now. I’m going to be a spinster, whether I was afraid of it or not.”
Flynn laughed. “Jo, there’s no way you’re going to be a spinster. You’re too pretty.”
“And clever,” Theo said.
I looked over at them, both smiling at me. I’d always been able to tell them apart, and not just because of Flynn’s scar. Their personalities were direct opposites. In a moment of anger, I’d once called outgoing, competitively ruthless Flynn a scoundrel. Whereas Theo was the scholarly type, bookish and shy. “I’m dedicating my life to the library. I’ll never let myself be hurt like that ever again.”
“Give it some time,” Theo said. “Someone new will come along.”
“I told you. I’m not interested.” I tightened the grip of my hands on my elbows. “What about you two? Do you have your eyes on anyone?” I asked, desperate to change the subject.
“Nah, I’m too young,” Flynn said.
“Not too young for war but too young for a wife?” I asked.
“I think I’ll be a bachelor,” Flynn said.
“You must have thought of someone while you were away? Did you write to anyone? Theo?”
“I didn’t write to anyone but I would’ve liked to.” The tips of Theo’s ears turned pink. “But I know she wouldn’t have wanted a letter from me. Flynn, probably, but not me.”
Flynn groaned. “Not this again. He thinks he’s in love with Louisa and that she’s in love with me.”
“Louisa?” Louisa Kellam Lind had a bit of a history with our family. When Quinn had first opened the school, Louisa came without her father’s permission. Later, we found out he’d been hurting her. After Mr. Kellam was killed, Pastor Lind and his wife, Pamela, had taken Louisa in as their own. Since then, she’d thrived, changing from a skinny, shabby little girl to a beautiful young woman. I’d no idea Theo liked her. Did she have eyes for Flynn? I hoped not, for Theo’s sake. “When did this happen?”
“Never mind,” Theo said. “It’s not anything to talk about.”
“Does she know you like her?” I asked Theo.
“I told her after we enlisted,” Theo said. “She wasn’t interested.”
“She’s been away at finishing school,” I said. “But Mrs. Lind says she’s coming home for the holidays and not returning. It’s because they adopted Louisa when she was already nine. They want more time with her.”
“Isn’t that what we all want?” Theo asked. “More time?”
Footsteps in the foyer drew our attention. Harley appeared in the doorway, carrying his hat. “Sorry to interrupt, but I wanted to let you know I’m headed out to the train station to pick up Mr. Baker.”
“Thank you, Harley,” I said. “I’ll be here.”
“What do you know about this Baker character?” Flynn asked after Harley left.
“Not much,” I said. “Other than he was kind enough to write me when Walter died.”
“I hope he’s as handsome as the devil,” Flynn said. “And brings you back to the land of the living.”
“Don’t be ridiculous,” I said. “This isn’t a romantic novel where a stranger arrives in town to capture the maiden in distress’s heart.”
Phillip
The moment I walked into the Barnes home I smelled the aroma of cookies. I didn’t have too much time to think about that, however, because Josephine appeared. Her photograph had lied. She was prettier in person. I hadn’t thought that possible. She wore a green wool dress that flattered her slender figure. However, she was smaller than I’d imagined—medium height with narrow shoulders and a small bust. Her eyes were the color of an emerald and slightly upturned, as if they were smiling. Golden hair piled on top of her head shone under the overhead light.
My stomach churned from nerves as she stepped forward to offer her hand. I brushed my lips against her gloved knuckles. I dared not hold on to her for long.
“Phillip, welcome to Emerson Pass,” Josephine said.
“Thank you.” As so often happened, my words were stuck in the back of my throat. Walter would have known what to say. Words had dripped from his tongue like warm honey over a biscuit. No one could resist the way he made you feel when you were with him. That had been his secret weapon in the war of love. “You’re lovely…I mean, your home. Is lovely. I’m sorry. I don’t mean to be forward.”
She smiled, dazzling me. “Thank you for the compliment. Both of them. How was your trip?”
“Harrowing. I met a friend of yours, though. Mrs. Neal. She and baby Quinn sat across from me.”
“Oh, how serendipitous. Did she entertain you with stories of our little town?”
I swallowed a nervous laugh. “Yes, I guess you could say that.”
From behind her, a young man entered the foyer from a room off to the right.
“This is my brother Theo,” she said.
We shook hands. As I looked into his dark eyes, I sensed a kindred spirit. There was a seriousness in his countenance as well as shyness and sensitivity. I wondered how he’d fared in the war. Had it broken a part of him as it had me?
“Pleased to meet you,” Theo said. “Flynn and I are excited to show you around.”
“I’d be grateful,” I said.
A man dressed in a formal black suit ap
peared. “Dear me, I apologize, Mr. Baker, I didn’t realize you’d arrived.” An English accent. I knew from the letters that Josephine’s father was British and that this was their faithful butler, Jasper.
“Not to worry, Jasper,” Josephine said. “He’s only just gotten here.”
“May I show you to your room?” Jasper asked.
“Yes, and then we’ll have tea,” Josephine said to me. “Lizzie’s made sandwiches and cakes for us.”
I nodded but didn’t trust myself to speak further. Jasper took hold of my suitcase and headed toward a stairwell made of dark wood. I followed him up the stairs and down a hallway to a bedroom with two sets of bunk beds. “You’ll be here with the twins. The bathroom is just through that door.” I spotted a white claw-foot tub and floor made of white tiles. “Will you mind sharing the room?”
“Not at all.”
“Would you like me to put away your things?” He gestured toward my suitcase.
“No, I prefer to take care of it myself. But thank you.” I didn’t want anyone to see my meager belongings.
“As Miss Josephine indicated, the Barnes family has tea every day around four. Whoever is around takes part. This household is loud, Mr. Baker, and can be overwhelming, so please take respite here in your room if need be. No one will hold it against you. I hope you’ll let me know if you need anything at all. If you require a trip into town, I’ll have someone take you there in the sleigh. After the first snowfall, we put the motorcars away and use the horses. Safer that way. You’ve met Harley. His wife’s called Merry and she assists me in the running of the household. My wife’s called Lizzie and she mostly rules the kitchen, along with Mrs. Wu. We all have children now, and they’re in and out of the downstairs, but please let me know if they bother you at all.”
“I grew up in an orphanage. It’ll be like home.”
Jasper’s formal expression twitched into a smile. “I often joke with Lord Barnes that we’re like an orphanage. All told, including the grown Barnes children, we have a dozen young ones here. Although I don’t suppose I can consider the twins or Josephine children any longer. But when you’ve been with a family as long as I, it’s hard to think of them as anything but children.
“May I ask about attire for tea and dinner?”
“You’re expected to dress for dinner but for tea, what you have on will do nicely.” Jasper cleared his throat. “One thing I’d like to say—we’re all grateful for what you chaps did over there. I say that as an Englishman and American. It’s an honor to have you here.”
“Yes, sir. Thank you.”
Jasper frowned. “It’s a frightfully long train ride from back east. If you’d like a bath before tea, take all the time you need. The Barnes family are not sticklers for formalities. They tend to meander in and out on their own timetables, so you may do the same without offense.”
“Much obliged.” I’d done nothing but say thank you since I’d arrived. “Also, would you mind giving this to Josephine for me?” I opened up my bag and pulled out the box of her letters to Walter. I’d kept her photograph in the pocket of my suit. I’d have to give that to her later. I wasn’t quite ready to part with the image that had anchored me to hope for so many months.
“Consider it done. Again, welcome to Emerson Pass.” Jasper walked away, the tapping of his heels as precise as his speech.
I went first to look at the bathroom. Electricity and running water? Luxury living. I didn’t belong here. I had no chance with a woman like Josephine. For the hundredth time that day, I questioned my sanity. What had made me think this was a good idea to come here?
Believe in yourself. No one else does. Men like us have to be scrappy to get what we want.
That had been advice from Walter.
A twinge of guilt rattled me further. Sure, Walter had been deceitful and conniving, but he’d been my friend. He’d seen us as the same. The type of men who weren’t invited to the club and had to worm our way in by nefarious means. However, I wasn’t that way. Despite my circumstances, or perhaps because of them, I held integrity and honesty above all else. Without them, who was I? A poor man who was also a liar? I had to claim something to be proud of. My character was all I had.
I tried to put my trepidations aside to enjoy a bath with the hot water and nice-smelling soap. Afterward, I shaved at the mirror. I didn’t look too bad considering the long train ride. My dark hair looked nice after a good wash. Dark smudges under my eyes had been there since I joined the army, so there was nothing to do about them. Nightmares plagued me and disturbed my sleep. Perhaps here in the quiet, I would sleep better.
Although I’d seen the same dark circles on Theo. Maybe the quiet didn’t help.
When I was done, I put on a fresh shirt and my light gray suit. At a few minutes to four, I headed back downstairs.
I can do this, I told myself as I walked into the sitting room. Dark paneling and brightly colored furniture gave the room a cheery feel, as did a roaring fire and the scent of cinnamon.
A tall, rather intimidating man stood by the fire. Sitting on the couch, a petite blonde woman had a book open on her lap. Two little girls played with dolls under a large desk.
“Hello there, you must be Phillip. I’m Lord Barnes, Josephine’s father.” He bounded across the room and pumped my hand, then slapped me on the shoulder. “We’re awfully glad you came.” His British accent made him seem even more posh to me.
The pretty woman on the couch had risen by this point and came forward, introducing herself as Quinn Barnes, Josephine’s mother. “Please call me Quinn. We’re not formal here.” She giggled. “Other than Jasper, that is.”
She didn’t look much older than Josephine. I knew from the letters that Quinn Barnes was her stepmother and quite a few years younger than Lord Barnes. However, I hadn’t been prepared for radiant beauty. The kind that came from the inside. “Thank you, Quinn.”
“Come sit,” Quinn said. “Are you famished? We have all this.” She gestured toward an impressive spread on the coffee table. “Sandwiches and little cakes. Lizzie was excited to welcome a new guest and made way too much.”
I sat in one of the chairs, eyeing the food as my stomach growled. Quinn handed me a small plate. She had this way about her that made me instantly at ease. “Help yourself to whatever you want. I can remember the first time I came here, having traveled such a long distance, all I could think of was food. I was practically starved back then.”
“She rationed out her food to one meal a day,” Lord Barnes said. “I’ve been fattening her up ever since.”
“Darling, you’re making me sound as if I’m a cow you’re preparing for market,” Quinn said, laughing.
“The attempt to fatten you clearly hasn’t worked,” I said. “You’re positively beautiful.” Why had I just said that? What an idiot I was.
“Why, thank you, Phillip. What a nice thing to say.”
“I agree,” Lord Barnes said as he knelt to kiss his wife’s cheek. He straightened to his full height. “The ladies are having tea, but I was thinking of a whiskey. Care to join me?”
“No, sir. I don’t drink whiskey.” This wasn’t entirely true, but I wanted to make a good impression.
“I’ll pour you a cup of tea,” Quinn said. “In this house, we have a lot of tea. I’m outnumbered with all the British folks.”
“A hot cup of tea is most welcome.” I filled a plate high with six small sandwiches cut into neat squares. From what I could tell, they were ham and cheese.
“Please, eat,” Quinn said. “Jo and the others will be down any minute, but let’s not wait for them. The early bird gets the worm.”
I did as I was asked, only too gladly. The bread was soft and instead of cheese, I discovered they were spread thick with butter. “This is…delicious.”
Quinn smiled and nodded her head approvingly. “Lizzie is the greatest cook the world has ever seen.”
“Oh, dearie me, not true.” A voice came from behind me. I turned to see a redheaded w
oman making her way into the room with another tray of sandwiches.
“This is Lizzie,” Quinn said.
“Welcome, welcome,” Lizzie said. “You must let me know all of your favorite foods and I’ll make them all for you while you’re here.”
“That won’t be necessary,” I said. “I don’t want to cause any extra work for anyone.”
“Nonsense. This is what I live for.” Lizzie’s face and figure were round. Pink cheeks glowed with health and good humor.
“This is the best sandwich I’ve ever eaten,” I said.
“I’m going to like you. Now I must get back to the kitchen. I wanted to get a good look at you first, Phillip Baker.” Lizzie looked over at Quinn. “He’ll do just fine, don’t you think?”
“Lizzie, mum’s the word,” Quinn said.
“Yes, yes, quite right.” Lizzie curtsied and then scampered from the room. I wondered if she’d left fairy dust in her wake.
While I ate, Lord Barnes joined his wife on the couch. The little girls approached, shooting shy glances as me.
“Ah yes, come meet our guest,” Lord Barnes said.
Quinn gestured for them to come closer. “This is Delphia, our youngest, and Adelaide, who is seven. Girls, this is Philip Baker, Jo’s friend.”
“Nice to meet you,” I said.
Delphia peered at me. She was an exceptionally pretty child, with large blue eyes and hair the color of dried grass. “Did you come from far away?”
“Yes, New York City.”
“Papa and Mama went there once,” Adelaide said, then flushed, as if embarrassed that she’d spoken. She was also fair of skin but didn’t have the robustness of her sister. A little too thin, and very serious eyes made her seem older than seven. She had the same shade of blue eyes as her sister, but her hair was so blond it was almost white.
“Papa hates it there,” Delphia said. “Too many people.”
“Delphia,” Lord Barnes said, laughing. “When did you hear me say that?”
Delphia shrugged as she turned her gaze toward the cakes. “I don’t know. You say a lot of things. Can I have cake?”
The Spinster (Emerson Pass Historicals Book 2) Page 4