by Rose Gordon
Alex looked at Caroline for an extended second and squeezed her shoulder, an apology for something she didn’t understand in his eyes. “Yes, he knew. He’s the one who asked me to have Caroline and Lady Olivia turned out.”
“Excuse me?” Caroline and the baron said in harmony.
Alex sighed. “A few years ago Lord Sinclair caught me outside my tailor’s in London and asked me to have Caroline and Lady Olivia banned from attending the meetings. I explained I couldn’t do that. I told him the Society was open to all patrons and I didn’t have the authority to turn them out for any reason. I told him he’d have to forbid them from going if he didn’t want them to attend. He was relentless about it though, claiming I would be doing a favor for my father’s closest friend. He pursued me every afternoon for a week before I finally agreed.”
“And you used the excuse of their sex for what reason?” Lady Watson asked quietly, surprising them all. With the exception of getting a quill and paper for her husband, she’d practically faded into the wallpaper for the past ten minutes.
Alex met her gaze and swallowed hard. “Lord Sinclair asked me to reject them without them knowing he was the one who requested it. I had no doubt in my mind Lady Olivia didn’t have the intelligence to stay and would have rejected her on the basis of not having enough knowledge on the subject, but the problem was Caroline. To be honest, I didn’t know what Caroline did or didn’t know about biology, and it would have seemed suspicious if I had to deny them for different reasons.”
“So you picked their sex,” Alex’s mother said tartly.
“Well, yes.” He crossed his arms. “It was the only thing they both shared that nobody else did. At the time we had no other ladies in attendance. Besides, many organizations are only open to gentlemen. I didn’t see a problem with it.” He locked gazes with Caroline. “As I said, I’m very sorry. I would never have done that if I hadn’t been pressed.”
Bile burned the back of her throat. How could Uncle Joseph have done this to her? He may not have spoiled her the way he had Olivia, but he’d never intentionally been cruel. Or so she’d thought. She nodded numbly to let Alex know she had at least heard his words.
“I just don’t believe it,” the baron said, sighing. “Did he say why?”
“No.” Alex solemnly shook his head. “I asked, but he wouldn’t say.”
Lord Watson shook his head. “It just doesn’t make sense that he’d brag about her to me one minute, then do something like this.” He ran his hands through his unkempt hair the same way Alex always did. “And he never gave any indication as to why?”
“No, he didn’t.” Alex shifted in his seat. “I have my suspicions, but he never said, so I don’t know for sure.”
“Well, since the man isn’t here for us to ask, your suspicions are as good as we’ve got. Spit it out, boy,” his father urged.
Caroline’s ears perked up. She was just as interested in hearing this as Alex’s father seemed to be.
Alex’s body stiffened next to her and his breathing grew labored. “I don’t know for sure,” he began slowly, “but I think it had something to do Rupert Griffin joining the Society at the meeting prior.”
His words made a wave of nausea pass through her like she’d never experienced before. It had been years since she’d heard the name of the horrifically vile man who dared call himself her father. She’d thought he’d been dead all this time. Apparently not. Apparently he was alive and well, and she’d even been in the same room with him only four short years ago when she’d attended her first, and only, meeting for the Society of Biological Matters.
Suddenly gratitude for Uncle Joseph washed over her. He’d had the foresight to have her thrown out of the Society in a way that not only didn’t expose him as the force behind it, but also didn’t expose her to the knowledge of her father’s presence still on this earth. She hadn’t been this thankful for him since he and a stranger had rescued her in the dead of night from Rupert’s evil clutches.
Silence filled the room, and Caroline stared at her white knuckles.
“You’re likely right, Alex,” Lord Watson acknowledged at last, his voice so quiet there was no doubt in her mind the baron knew just who Rupert Griffin was to her.
“I should probably be going now,” Caroline whispered, still not daring to look up from her lap.
Alex shifted and pulled out his pocket watch. “You’re right.”
Caroline used the arm of the settee for support as she tried to stand on her shaky legs.
“Are you all right?” Alex asked, steadying her as he stood up next to her.
“Yes,” she said weakly, trying to hold onto every shred of dignity she had left. She looked at him, and where she expected to see disgust or disapproval, concern and tenderness were present instead. Her breath caught. Either he didn’t know, or he didn’t seem to care. She swallowed and chanced a glance at his parents. Then just as quickly, she jerked her gaze away.
“Caroline,” Alex’s father said a moment later.
She moved her eyes in his direction, but was not able to meet his. “My lord?”
“Don’t ‘my lord’ me, I don’t like it,” he said, his lips twisting in distaste. “I wanted to ask a favor of you, if I might.”
She nodded. “Of course, anything.”
He scratched his jaw. “Well, you see, one of my greatest friends may have done something some might consider ungentlemanly. I’d hate for such a thing to be known about him. And I’d like to know his secret is safe with you.” He paused, not long enough for her to reply, but long enough for her to see the earnest look in his eyes. “In return for your silence on this matter, I’ll give you the assurance that any secret I may ever happen to learn about you will never pass my lips.”
Tears welled up in her eyes as she comprehended his meaning. He knew. He knew everything there was to know about her past and he wasn’t judging her for it. Whether he’d been so cryptic about telling her this for the sake of her pride or because there was a chance Alex didn’t know, she wasn’t sure. She honestly didn’t care. All she cared was that her secrets were safe with the baron. “Your friend’s secret is safe with me,” she said weakly.
Lord Watson nodded and winked at her. “Very good. What about my son’s? He acted far more ungentlemanly, I must say. I’d say you could spread that rumor about him, but I’m afraid it might tarnish my good name, too.”
Despite herself, a hint of a smile crossed lips. “I’ll keep his secret, too, I suppose. I’d hate ungentlemanly behavior to be associated with the Banks name.”
“Phew, I’m relieved,” the baron said, wiping the back of his hand across his forehead. “Now I won’t have to live out my last days in the shame of my son’s transgressions.”
Alex scoffed. “I never caused you the level of embarrassment most sons have.”
“You’re right,” his father conceded thoughtfully. “You’ve been an excellent son. Would you mind coming back to talk to me a minute after you see the beautiful Caroline to her carriage?”
“Yes, Father. Wait here a moment, Caroline, I’ll be right back. I need to go order your carriage and send for your maid or we’ll have to wait a few minutes downstairs.” He quickly slipped out the door, leaving her alone with his parents.
Alex’s mother walked over to her to say goodbye. Caroline met her steady gaze and saw the same thing in her eyes she’d seen in Lord Watson’s: compassion. They didn’t pity her, nor did they hold her in contempt.
A few silent minutes passed before Alex came back and walked her down the stairs. “Are you sure you’re all right?” he asked, stopping outside the front door and turning to face her.
“Yes,” she said, not meeting his eyes.
He sighed. “I didn’t want you to know any of that. Your uncle didn’t do it to hurt you. There’s more to it, something you don’t know.” His eyes moved up and down her face. “Caroline, please don’t hold a grudge against either of us about this.”
“I’m not,” she said tru
thfully. She was thankful to each of them for their roles in protecting her from Rupert.
“Are you sure?”
“Yes.”
“Good.” He escorted her to her carriage and stopped her before she could step on the first stair. “Do you think it might be all right if I came by to see you tomorrow?”
“Why?” she blurted, blinking. He was Olivia’s intended, he should be calling on her, not Caroline.
“We ran out of time to talk of the campaign like I promised. And seeing as how my past is riddled with ungentlemanly behavior, I need to mend my ways, starting with keeping my promises.” He tucked a tendril of her hair behind her ear.
“I suppose that’s acceptable,” she said with a rueful shake of her head. Alex Banks, or Arid Alex as the rest of England referred to him due to his unfailing gentlemanly behavior, was the furthest thing from ungentlemanly.
“Excellent,” he said, helping her ascend the steps to the carriage. When she reached the top, he didn’t release her hand immediately. Instead, he stood at the bottom of the steps and pressed a searing kiss to the top of her knuckles. “Until tomorrow.”
***
Alex whistled as he walked back to his father’s room. His courtship with Caroline was off to an excellent start. She didn’t seem too terribly put off by his father, which, he must admit, was a good sign.
“I’ve returned.”
“I see that,” Father said before choking down another one of Cook’s nasty tonics.
Alex plopped down longways on the settee he’d earlier sat on with Caroline. He propped up his feet on the end and gritted his teeth in anticipation while he waited for his father to speak about the unspeakable topic Alex knew he was about to be forced to discuss.
“Is she the one, son?”
“The one?” Alex echoed in shock. He hadn’t expected to come back in here to talk about Caroline.
His father threw the covers off his thin legs. “You know, the one you want to marry instead of Lady Olivia.”
“That’s my hope.”
“Mine as well.” Father reached down to adjust his stocking. “She seems a good match for you.”
“Doesn’t she?” he agreed, crossing his ankles and carelessly knocking the sides of his boots together. “We practically enjoy all the same things. Except lawn games. I still detest those. But she likes to study science. That’s far more important.”
Father shook his head. “Son, I know you like science—and hell, so do I—but after I married your mother, I learned there’s a lot more to life than case studies and experiments.”
Alex blinked at him. He knew there was more to life; he just wasn’t interested in discovering it.
Scrubbing his face, Father said, “I think you’ll find there’s more to enjoy in life if you stop thinking with that overworked brain of yours all the time.”
“And what should I think with?” Alex asked, grinning. He threaded his fingers together behind his head, then leaned his head back and closed his eyes.
“Learn to rely on feelings and emotions a bit more,” his father said, a slight edge to his voice.
Alex frowned. “So you’re saying I should let my heart lead me?” That was no better than Andrew’s stupid suggestion of taking Caroline to the orangery and letting his instincts take over.
“Yes,” his father agreed. “Think more with your heart. And with an organ that resides about eighteen inches lower.”
Alex’s eyes snapped open and his jaw dropped. “I can’t believe it,” he said after he’d recovered from his slight shock.
“Believe it, my boy. I am actually encouraging you to think with the head that possesses no brain. Not a lot, mind you. Just every once in a while. You’ll be surprised at how much it will enrich your life.”
Alex nodded mutely. This was the most bizarre conversation they’d ever had. This even outdid the awkwardness from the time four years ago when he’d been eating in the breakfast room, and without even a word of greeting, Father had walked in and asked Alex if he was still a virgin. “I’ll not do anything to bring shame to Caroline,” he said defensively.
“Good. I didn’t ask you to. Her uncle was my friend, after all. I think he—and she—deserves far more respect than that. What I’m trying to say is you think too much. You analyze everything to the point that you overlook, and sometimes ruin, so many things. If you’d allow something else to enter the equation, you might find you like what you see.”
“And you think I’m going to accomplish that by thinking with my genitals more often?”
“Absolutely,” Father agreed heartily. “But not too much. Thinking too much with a man’s John Thomas can only lead him into trouble.”
“Yes, that I can imagine,” Alex murmured, closing his eyes again.
“You don’t believe me,” Father said, his voice quiet. “Look at me, boy.”
Alex respectfully opened his eyes and sat right on the settee. He may be nearly thirty and his father nearly to his grave, but they both knew to whom respect was still due. “I believe you.”
“No, you don’t. I can see it by the look on your face.” Father crossed his arms. “Look at your friend Andrew. Do you think it was his brain that got Brooke to be his countess? No, it was the randy urges associated with his St. Peter. Which is also why those two seem to be so happy together—”
“And why she’s breeding all the time,” Alex mumbled under his breath.
“That, too,” Father agreed, winking at Alex when his eyes went wide. “I heard you. Just because I’m dying doesn’t mean I’m in need of an ear horn.”
Alex sighed. “You forget. Those two are the exception, not the rule.”
“That may be true, but they’re not the only ones.” Father picked up a glass of water and took a large swallow. “Love before, or after, marriage is rare, I grant you. But it can happen. However, mutual respect and companionship are more likely to happen, which can be enough.”
“What can be enough?” Uncle John asked, peeking his head in the bedroom door.
“Mutual respect and companionship within a marriage,” Father quickly informed him.
His uncle blinked at both of them. “Why are the two of you discussing marriage? You’re not thinking of letting Edwina marry so soon, are you?”
“No, not Edwina. Alex is getting married within the month,” Father said proudly.
Uncle John turned to Alex. “Congratulations, Alex. I must have missed the announcement.”
“That’s because there wasn’t one,” Alex bit off, shoving one of his mother’s throw pillows behind his back for comfort.
“Oh,” his uncle said, sitting in a chair across the room. “And who is the bride?”
“Miss Caroline Sinclair,” Alex said quickly before his father could even suggest Lady Olivia.
“He hopes,” Father said without a hint of humor in his voice.
“He hopes?” Uncle John’s curious gaze darted back and forth between the two.
Father shrugged, making the sleeve of his nightshirt slip to the edge of his bony shoulder. “He hopes she’ll agree to marry him.”
“But you just said he’s getting married within the month,” Uncle John countered.
“He is,” Father agreed. “Either to Caroline or Lady Olivia.”
Uncle John made a choking noise and his eyes nearly popped out of his head. “What have you done?” he asked with all the authority of a man who’d been a minister to troubled souls for slightly less than thirty years.
“I didn’t do anything. He did,” Alex accused sourly, jabbing a finger in his father’s direction.
“What my son means to say is, at one point in time I might have agreed to a betrothal between Alex and Lady Olivia,” Father said innocently.
“You what?” Uncle John’s face turned so pale Alex thought his uncle might faint.
“I have no need to defend myself to you, little brother. The facts are I made the agreement, and Alex has until his thirtieth birthday to either find another bride or mar
ry Lady Olivia.”
“And you waited this long?” Uncle John asked, turning his piercing blues eyes back on Alex.
“Not intentionally, I assure you,” Alex said irritably. “I didn’t even know of this confounded agreement until a couple of days ago.”
“For goodness’ sake, Edward, why did you wait so long to tell him?” Uncle John burst out. “He’s not Andrew. He cannot meet and marry a young lady in less than a fortnight.” His uncle leaned his head forward and tapped his fingers against his temples.
“Oh, hush up, John,” Father told his brother. “He may not be as slimy as two of your three sons-in-law, but he isn’t incapable of finding a bride, either.”
“Well, that’s good news,” his uncle said a bit sarcastically. He looked at Alex and swallowed. “I’m going to say something that had better never leave this room. Understand?”
“Of course,” Alex agreed.
“I’d rather go on a platform before all of England proclaiming my love and admiration for both Andrew and Benjamin than be any kind of relation to Lady Olivia.”
Alex bit the inside of his cheek so he wouldn’t ruin his uncle’s glory by pointing out that even if Alex married Caroline, they’d all still be some relation to Lady Olivia. Instead, he nodded.
“Do whatever it takes not to marry that wretched young lady,” Uncle John continued. “Lie, cheat, steal, beg, or barter if you must. Just do whatever it takes so I do not have to share a last name with that awful creature.” He shuddered. “As much as it irritates me to suggest this, ask Andrew for advice. He seemed to have no difficulty meeting, ruining, and marrying my daughter in hardly any time at all.”
Alex dropped his gaze to the floor. He didn’t exactly wish to admit he’d already done that and had been given terrible advice.
“That’s what I suggested,” Father piped in.
“No, it’s not,” Alex said, shaking his head. “You said nothing about asking Andrew about his strategy. You told me to stop thinking with my brain and make my decisions with my—” He broke off abruptly when he remembered there was a minister in the room.