by Cat Schield
“That’s not possible,” he said, his attention studiously avoiding Harley.
“Mommy and I always stay at your house,” Daniel pointed out, something he’d been mentioning on and off to Harley in the week since she and Grant had called it quits. “Why can’t you stay here?”
“Yes, Grant,” Piper purred, contributing to the chaos. “Why can’t you stay here? I’m sure Harley would be happy to put you up on the couch.”
Harley was torn between laughing at Grant’s discomfort and kicking her aunt under the table. She knew it was wrong to use her son’s innocent request to torment Grant, but he deserved a taste of what she’d been dealing with since their estrangement.
“Neither one of you can stay,” she told her son. “Tonight is supposed to be a girls’ night only for Aunt Piper and Mommy. Now go get your backpack so Grant can take you to his house.”
Daniel surveyed all three adults before nodding. “Okay, Mommy.”
“Why don’t I give him a hand,” Piper said, springing from the table to follow after her great nephew, leaving Grant and Harley alone.
She immediately got to her feet and began to clear the table. From the look on Grant’s face, he had something on his mind and she refused to sit around and let him voice it. Nor did she want to unload any of the turbulent thoughts spinning through her head. They’d both said everything pertinent and she might not be fine with it, but she knew a dead end when she saw it.
“It was really nice of you to let me have dinner with you,” Grant said, pursuing her into the kitchen with a stack of dishes.
“Daniel invited you,” she pointed out.
“You could’ve said no.”
She leveled an exasperated look at him.
“The food was incredible,” he said. “I had no idea you could cook like that. And, of course, the company was great, too. I’ve missed—”
“Don’t.”
She’d offered him this. She’d opened her heart and presented him with a ready-made family who loved him and he’d made it clear he had no intention of moving their romantic relationship forward. He wanted everything the way he wanted it and she wasn’t okay with that.
“Harley...”
Panic enveloped her at his melancholy tone. She shook her head to stop him, afraid he might say something that would sway her treacherous heart. She had to hold herself apart from him and maintain a clear head if she intended to navigate what could become a tricky custody situation.
“We’re fine. I’m fine. Everything’s fine.”
Desperate to flee, she started to go past him, but he caught her arm, long fingers encircling her bare skin. Longing shot from the point of contact to her aching heart. She was poised halfway between throwing her arms around his neck and yanking free of his grip when he spoke again.
“I missed this.” His husky murmur battered at the wall she’d raised to hold back her misery. “I miss us.”
So do I.
“I think it’s pretty obvious that Daniel does, too,” she said and nearly swooned with gratitude as his hand fell away.
She hardened her heart against his dazed expression. He looked nearly as shell-shocked as when she declared her intention to return to Thailand. She kept telling herself that there had to be some way to make all of them happy. But at the moment, she couldn’t figure out how. Either she stayed in Texas and gave up her dream of expanding Zest’s good works to other countries. Or she gave up partial custody of her son. She no longer feared that Grant would demand full custody, but even half of Daniel was too much of a sacrifice. It wasn’t fair.
After Grant escorted Daniel out the front door, Harley and Piper cleaned up the dishes and put the kitchen back to its former pristine condition. As the dishwasher began to hum, Piper turned to her niece with bright eyes.
“You two are—”
“Oh, please don’t tell me we’re acting like idiots.”
Piper snorted. “Well, that, too, but what I was going to say is that you two are crazy in love with each other.”
Harley put her hand on her chest as her heart gave a sickening lurch. Anguish stopped her breath for a beat. “I’m in love with Grant, but the feeling is not mutual.”
“Don’t be so sure. That man’s in pain.”
“Because he’s afraid I’m going to take Daniel back to Thailand before he can sue me for partial custody.” The tightness in her throat eased. “I’ve decided I won’t.”
“Won’t go back to Thailand or not before you give Grant partial custody?”
“I love them both too much to separate them. Although it’s not going to be easy to keep Zest going from halfway around the world, I’ve decided to stay in Texas. But not in Royal. I don’t think I could face running into him all the time. And I want to avoid as much Wingate family drama as possible. Maybe Dallas.”
“I know how much your nonprofit means to you,” Piper said. “That’s quite a sacrifice you’re making.”
“It’s only fair since I was responsible for Grant missing out on the first four years of Daniel’s life.”
Piper studied her niece for several seconds before enveloping her in a warm hug. “You have developed into an outstanding woman. I’m so proud of you.”
Harley put her arms around Piper and hugged back. “You have no idea how much that means to me. I’ve been so miserable without you.”
“We both let our stubbornness get in the way.” Piper pushed Harley to arm’s length and gave her a little shake. “Use that same bullheaded determination when it comes to Grant. That man loves you, but he’ll never admit it if you give up on him.”
Harley sagged in defeat. “I’ve said and done all I can. Grant is going to have to figure out what he wants on his own.”
Twelve
When Piper called and invited Grant to her gallery for an opening, he almost begged off, but decided a weekend in Dallas to clear his head might be just what he needed. Even though he wasn’t scheduled to see Daniel until Monday, he shot Harley a text to let her know he’d be out of town for the next few days. She responded with a neutral, Have a fun weekend, and he left Royal early Saturday morning, feeling like his entire world was falling apart.
With nearly the whole day to kill before the opening, he met a friend from medical school for lunch. He hadn’t seen Josh since the birth of his third child and found he had a whole new appreciation for the pride with which his friend showed off pictures of his beautiful family. Grant whipped out his own smartphone and flashed all the photos he’d taken of Daniel and Harley. His heart ached at how happy they all looked.
“I can’t believe you have a son,” Josh said, eyeing a particularly charming picture of Harley and Daniel nose to nose, grinning at each other. “Where has he been all this time?”
“Thailand.” Grant noticed the acute pang in his chest at the thought of his son being halfway around the world. “He was born there.”
Josh looked sympathetic. “You didn’t know?”
“Things didn’t end well between the two of us before she moved, and then I got married and Harley didn’t want to interfere in my life.”
“But now she’s back.”
“She is,” Grant said. But a gulf existed between them as wide as if she and Daniel still lived halfway around the world.
“Kids are great, aren’t they?” Josh continued. “I mean there are days when mine drive me crazy, but my life would be so much less without them.”
“I never thought about being a father until Daniel came along,” Grant admitted, his mood thoughtful. “Now it’s all I want.”
His buddy glanced at Grant’s phone screen once more. “You guys look really happy.”
Grant turned the phone and regarded the image of himself with Harley and Daniel. Just staring at the picture lightened Grant’s whole being. The three of them were laughing. Their connection so clear. That day had been
great. Amazing. Spending time with Harley and Daniel had brought him more joy than he’d ever known.
But it hadn’t lasted, just like he knew it wouldn’t. He and Harley wanted different things and like with his marriage, it had been only a matter of time before their varying expectations drove them apart. Still, comparing his relationships with Harley and Paisley wasn’t fair. His entire marriage hadn’t stirred the sort of emotional squall that a single weekend with Harley had done. At the time, he’d considered that a good thing. But since his marriage hadn’t worked out, Grant wondered if he had a clue what was truly best for him.
The question remained unanswered when Grant entered Piper’s gallery later that night. He assumed she’d invited him as a patron of the arts. To his surprise, Harley’s aunt made no attempt to convince him to buy anything. Instead, she herded him into a corner and fixed her dark green eyes on him.
“What’s going on with you and my niece?” she began without preliminaries.
“What do you mean?” he asked, not intending to dodge her question, but hoping she would clarify whatever point she was trying to make.
“For weeks now, Harley has been Grant this and Grant that. And Grant and Daniel this and Grant and Daniel that. But now she tells me she’s not going to stay in Royal. I thought you two were trying to make it work.”
“Yes, well.” Grant crossed his arms over his chest. “It’s not working.”
Piper gave an impatient snort. “So, what are you doing about that?”
“To start, my intention is to be legally recognized as Daniel’s biological father.”
“That’s smart.”
“Damn right it is,” Grant snapped. “He’s my son. I have rights.”
“Of course you do. But isn’t there a better way to go about getting what you want?”
Grant stared at Piper, noted her intent regard, but couldn’t quite fathom what she was trying to get at. “Such as?”
“What about you, Harley and Daniel being together?” When he continued to regard her blankly, she added, “As a family.”
The suggestion went through him like a lightning strike. “Too many things have gone wrong between us. I don’t think she’ll have me.”
“Have you asked her?” Piper asked, looking unimpressed by his grumbling.
“I have.” Hadn’t he?
Grant had tried bribing her with funding for Zest and when that had failed, he’d blustered about her decision to take Daniel away.
“I’ve made it perfectly clear that I want more time with Daniel.”
Piper rolled her eyes. “You took the easy way out by making all of this about Daniel.”
Because fixing his custody situation was something tangible and within his control. “It is all about Daniel.”
“Is it?” Piper countered slyly. “I don’t think so. Why don’t you try telling her you love her and see what happens?”
Grant opened his mouth but no words came out. Long ago, he’d learned a hard lesson. It hurt too much to let his heart lead the way. And yet, could he honestly say that logic had guided his decision to become a doctor against his parents’ wishes? Wasn’t his crusade to help create families a deeply personal, emotional mission for him? Every successful procedure brought him satisfaction because he had enabled another’s joy. If all that was true, why did he use professionalism to isolate himself instead of celebrating with his patients?
Because if he allowed his emotion to flow, he might not be able to rein himself back in.
“Harley loves you,” Piper declared. “You love her. What are you so damned afraid of?”
Before he could answer, Piper’s gaze shifted past him and something in her expression sent an electric shock of fear through Grant. He knew Harley stood behind him and the ache in his chest made it nearly impossible to catch his breath.
“This is the moment to declare how you really feel about her,” Piper said, squeezing his arm in encouragement.
“I don’t know if I can,” he admitted, the admission born of fear and an instinctive need to avoid pain. It was like being asked to perform surgery on himself without anesthetic. The hurt would be intense, but it was something he needed to go through to heal.
“You can.” Piper hit him with a stern look before she moved past him. “Don’t hold anything back.”
Grant tracked Piper’s retreat for a couple seconds before shifting his full attention to Harley. As soon as their eyes locked, she began to turn away. No! In that instant of abject panic, he recognized the truth. He loved her—deeply, passionately, without reason or sanity. Confronting this reality was as terrifying and perilous as he’d expected and something he’d been running from since the moment she arrived back in Royal.
“Harley, wait.” Grant crossed the space between them in three gigantic strides and caught her hand. “I need to talk to you.”
Her chest rose and fell on a huge sigh. “Look, you win,” she said, her shoulders slumping in defeat. “It wasn’t fair of me to keep you away from Daniel for the last four years and it wouldn’t be right for us to go back to Thailand now. So, I’ve decided that we’re staying in Texas.”
Her decision should’ve thrilled him. Instead, his confidence cracked beneath the impact of her sacrifice. “I’m glad.”
“I figured you would be.” A cynical smile twisted her lips. “And Daniel’s happy here. He’s made new friends and all his family is here.”
Nowhere in any of her rationale had she mentioned anything that benefited her. Grant knew how hard she’d worked to make Zest a success and that running the nonprofit from Texas wasn’t ideal. Yet, she was willing to dial down her dreams so her son would benefit from having his father in his life and Grant couldn’t even confess how important she was to him.
“It’s great that you’re staying,” he said, “because...”
His entire world would change with the next sentence he declared. Did he confess the unvarnished truth of his heart and work damned hard to make her happy? Or should he continue to play it safe and slowly but surely fail to live up to her expectations? Harley wouldn’t be satisfied with half measures and excuses. She was the sort who went all in and would expect him to do the same.
“I think you and Daniel should move in with me.”
* * *
Harley gasped. Move in with him?
“Have you thought this through at all?” The question flew from her lips before she had a chance to weigh the best way to respond.
“No,” he admitted, looking more than a little stunned by his impulsiveness. “But it’s exactly what I want.”
It would be the height of foolishness to assume he meant anything other than what was utterly practical. Of course, Grant needed her. He needed her to stay in Texas so he’d have access to his son. If she returned to Thailand, Daniel would go with her. Grant intended to take her to court, but those things took time. She could be gone before the custody battle happened and he’d be forced to wait until she returned to the states once more to assert his rights.
“Why?”
“I need both you and Daniel in my life.”
“You need us,” Harley echoed, schooling herself not to read anything into such an unsatisfying answer. “And you think living with me is the price you have to pay in order to be a full-time father.”
Her heart broke as she recognized the folly of her dream to become a family with him. Why hadn’t she listened when he told her that he wasn’t marriage material? She’d deceived herself into believing that he hadn’t truly loved Paisley. Or that they hadn’t suited each other. He’d claimed Paisley had expected too much from him. That she’d demanded more than he could give her.
Harley had convinced herself that he would stop relying on his logic and trust his emotions when it came to her. She knew he loved Daniel, even if he couched the affection in a word like need. And she was starting to think he held s
ome sort of fondness for her. But friendship wasn’t enough. She couldn’t be satisfied with whatever portion of himself Grant was willing to give. She wanted everything he was and to give him all of her in return. The best and worst of each other. The passion and the reason. To be friends, lovers and soul mates.
“Don’t be ridiculous,” he said, scowling at her. “The only reason I asked you to move in with me is because I can’t bear to live without you.”
Weeks earlier, his words would’ve been music to her ears. Now, she worried that he was only telling her what she wanted to hear so he could arrange everything to suit him. But what if he was truly ready to give their relationship a chance?
“Why the change?” Before she gave in, she needed to hear his motivation. “What do you really want?”
“I want you.” He took her hands in his and squeezed gently. “I have since we first met.”
Harley’s throat locked up. “Why are you telling me this now? Do you think that I will fall so madly in love with you that I won’t reconsider returning to Thailand? Or is this your way of keeping me happy until we settle our custody arrangements?”
Grant shook his head. “Have you ever thought of me as manipulative?”
“No.” She surveyed his expression while her heart pounded. “But a week ago you told me we had no future. Now you’re asking me to move in with you. Forgive me for thinking you’re desperate enough to keep Daniel around that you’re willing to do anything.”
“A week ago I was convinced that the only way I would be happy is if I had everything the way I wanted it.” Grant freed one of her hands so he could cup her cheek.
Harley latched on to his wrist for support as her knees wobbled. “A week ago, you wanted me to stay in Texas. Today, I told you I would.” She drew in an unsteady breath. “Isn’t that everything you want?”
“Not everything.” Grant dipped his head and grazed his lips over hers, before murmuring, “I need you.”
Harley’s heart softened beneath his fervent tone, but she was too afraid of being disappointed to give hope a chance. “Because I’m Daniel’s mother...”