‘Yes.’
‘But why?’ She shook her head. ‘What I mean is, why stay here when our house isn’t far away?’
‘You want the truth?’
‘Of course,’ she said indignantly.
‘Memories,’ came Jordan’s single-worded reply.
‘Memories…? Good or bad?’ she asked sharply.
‘Oh, definitely—’ he broke off as someone knocked on the door. ‘Excuse me.’ He stood up to answer it.
Kelly could have cried with frustration. She had wanted to know the answer to that question, so when she saw it was Janet Amery at the door she glared at her angrily.
The poor girl couldn’t have missed that show of resentment, and she moved uncomfortably. ‘I’m sorry to trouble you, Jordan, Mrs Lord,’ she said nervously. ‘But Richard just called.’
‘And?’ Jordan was charged with a sudden excitement.
Janet held out a sheet of paper to him. ‘I have the figures here.’
He took the sheet from her, skimming over it. There was a look of triumph in his eyes when he at last looked up. ‘Get Jimmy on the phone,’ he instructed. ‘And when you’ve done that have Richard stand by. I’ll have some last-minute instructions for him.’
‘Yes, Jordan.’ She was already moving to the phone.
‘On second thoughts don’t have Richard stand by, get him over here,’ Jordan said thoughtfully. ‘We can discuss the finer points of the contract once I’ve spoken to Jimmy.’
‘Yes, Jordan.’ His secretary began to dial, giving a look of apology in Kelly’s direction. ‘I’m sorry I’ve spoilt your evening,’ she said shyly.
‘You haven’t.’ Kelly stood up resignedly, turning to Jordan. ‘I think I’ll say goodnight.’
‘Goodnight?’ He looked up from the figures he was working on. ‘Oh—oh yes, Goodnight, Kelly.’
She didn’t think he even noticed her going. It was just like old times, nothing had changed. Except her. She had changed. Once upon a time she would have made a scene about his preoccupation with work. But then she had been his wife, now she was just playing a role, and the sooner she remembered that the better.
How long would it last? How long would they have to continue this charade? It was becoming more difficult by the minute, Kelly having extreme difficulty remembering she was only playing a part, that in the end she and Jordan would once again be apart.
CHAPTER FOUR
THEY visited her father daily, either together or individually, but he didn’t seem to have remembered any more, treating Kelly and Jordan to a lot of teasing about their newly married state. Kelly preferred it when she saw her father alone, finding it a strain to behave like a blushing bride when in the company of Jordan. Alone she could recall how happy she had really been, and her father seemed convinced.
She went to the house the day before her father’s discharge, just to make sure everything was ready for when they arrived. Besides, she had to reintroduce herself to Mrs McLeod; the poor woman must be in a complete daze about this strange turn of events.
Nothing had changed, none of the decor, nor Mrs McLeod’s plump, bustling figure, nothing. Kelly could almost believe herself that the last five years away from Jordan hadn’t happened. She was falling more and more into this trap even at the hotel, was accepting Jordan’s easy companionship, was even coming to rely on it.
‘Here we are, then,’ Mrs McLeod brought Kelly in a tray of tea. ‘It’s just like old times,’ she beamed.
‘Not quite,’ Kelly smiled. ‘I actually came just to make sure Jordan had explained the situation to you.’
‘Oh, Mr Lord has told me all about your father. Terrible business, terrible.’ She shook her head.
‘Yes,’ Kelly agreed. ‘Won’t you join me in some tea?’ she invited.
The elderly lady flushed her pleasure. ‘Oh, I couldn’t!’
‘Sure?’ Kelly poured herself a cup.
‘Yes—thank you. I’ve put your father in the room he always used, I thought that best.’
‘Yes,’ Kelly frowned. ‘It’s all going to be very awkward, like walking on broken glass.’
‘He doesn’t remember a thing?’
‘Not after Mr Lord and I were married, no. That’s the reason it’s all going to be awkward.’
Just how awkward she didn’t realise until she and Jordan brought her father home the next day. Now they would be continually under her father’s watchful gaze, wouldn’t be able to drop their pose for a minute. Dr Jones had underlined the fact that her father must receive no shocks, had direly warned of the possible consequences if he realised the truth, desecrated the black void in his memory.
Her father looked around him admiringly as he seated himself in the lounge, the small plaster on his brow the only evidence of his recent accident. ‘I always liked this house,’ he spoke to Jordan. ‘But you have to admit that Kelly’s made it into a home.’
‘She certainly has,’ Jordan nodded agreement, watching Kelly as she sat pleating her skirt. ‘I wouldn’t know what to do without her now.’
‘I should hope not,’ the other man laughed. ‘Not for a while anyway. How are you, Kelly? You’re looking a little pale.’
‘Darling?’ Jordan prompted as she continued the nervous movements on her skirt.
She looked startled, colour flooding her cheeks at how easy he found it to use that endearment. ‘Sorry?’ she blinked her puzzlement.
His mouth twisted wryly. ‘Your father was expressing concern about your paleness.’
She bit her lip. ‘Excitement,’ she excused jerkily. ‘It’s so nice to have you home, Daddy.’
‘It’s nice to be here. I was just wondering if your paleness could be due to—anything?’ He quirked an eyebrow questioningly.
‘Due to any—? No!’ Kelly went white. ‘No…’ she repeated faintly.
‘Give us a chance, David,’ Jordan took over. ‘We’ve only been married a few weeks.’
‘It was just an idea—’
‘Excuse me.’ Kelly jumped to her feet. ‘I—I feel ill!’ She ran from the room.
Her father had unwittingly touched on the one subject she couldn’t act over. She was shaking by the time she reached the bedroom she had once shared with Jordan, sinking down on to the bed before her legs gave out on her. A baby was the one thing she couldn’t pretend about.
The bedroom door opened and Jordan came into the room. ‘That wasn’t very wise.’
‘Wise!’ she repeated shrilly. ‘I know it wasn’t,’ the fight went out of her. ‘But I couldn’t—I couldn’t take that, Jordan. Not about the baby. Try to understand, Jordan—’
‘I do understand,’ he cut in gently, coming over to sit beside her on the double bed. ‘I do understand, Kelly,’ he took her hand into his.
Her breath caught in her throat. So far she had avoided letting him touch her as much as possible. Here in this bedroom, where so many intimacies had taken place between them, it was all the more dangerous.
‘You’ve never understood, Jordan,’ she dismissed scathingly, snatching her hand away. ‘Now isn’t the time to start trying.’
‘I’m not going to argue with you.’ He stood up to pace the room. ‘Not with your father waiting for us downstairs.’
‘No,’ she accepted quietly. ‘I’m sorry.’
His eyes widened fractionally. ‘Come down and talk to your father. He’s going to have a rest after lunch, so you can relax for a while. I never realised you found it such a strain being in love with me.’
‘Pretending to be in love with you. There’s a subtle difference.’
‘It isn’t subtle, Kelly,’ his mouth twisted. ‘It’s like a blow on the head.’
‘Maybe.’
Anger blazed in his steely grey eyes at her indifference. ‘I shall be working this afternoon while your father is sleeping. What will you be doing?’
Kelly shrugged uninterestedly. ‘I’ll stay here, I suppose. One of us should be here, don’t you think?’ Her voice was sugary sweet in her sa
rcasm.
‘Are you spoiling for that argument after all, Kelly?’ Jordan’s voice was soft, threateningly so.
‘I was just pointing out—’
‘I shall be here all afternoon,’ he interrupted icily. ‘Janet and I will be working in my study.’
Jealousy flared and was quickly dampened down. ‘In that case I’ll go out.’ She had watched Jordan with his secretary these last few days, had watched the lazy way he flirted with her, had seen the way the other girl blushed at his light bantering. It wasn’t the reaction of a girl who was completely uninterested in him, although she and Richard Burrows seemed happy enough.
Kelly had met Richard Burrows several times at the hotel, had found him pleasant enough, although he didn’t have Ian Smythe’s ability to make decisions for himself. Jordan was still very much in charge of his business empire, Richard more in the nature of another secretary rather than the assistant he was supposed to be. Ian had always taken on more responsibility, in fact during the first months of their marriage Jordan had left a lot of work to the other man, spending most of his time with Kelly—until she had told him about the baby. Then he had gone back to the office, had taken to working long into the evening too, had often not even arrived home before Kelly had gone to bed.
‘Kelly,’ Jordan stopped her as she moved to the door. ‘Kelly, as far as your father is concerned our marriage is just starting, couldn’t we do the same?’
Her violet eyes searched his face in questioning disbelief. ‘Are you suggesting we start again?’ she asked stiffly.
‘Yes,’ he confirmed huskily.
She flinched away from him, glaring her dislike. ‘You don’t need a wife, Jordan, you never did.’
There was a white ring of tension about his mouth. ‘I need you, Kelly,’ his voice was husky. ‘Only you.’
‘It’s a little late in the day to discover that,’ she told him coldly. ‘Now if you don’t mind I think I’ll go down and talk to my father. We aren’t being very good hosts. Are you coming down?’
‘In a minute.’ He didn’t look at her, his hands clenched into fists at his sides. ‘I’ll be down in a minute,’ he repeated jerkily.
‘Very well,’ Kelly left him.
If she had been weaker, if she didn’t have that conversation between Jordan and Angela Divine to remind her of his duplicity she might, almost, have been persuaded by his plea for a second chance. But if he could betray her once then he could do it again, and she wasn’t strong enough to leave him a second time.
Her father was drinking coffee when she entered the lounge, a weariness to him in repose that he made every effort to hide when with Jordan and herself. He looked older, with deep lines beside his nose and mouth; he had lost weight too, and Kelly’s heart went out to him.
He turned and saw her, and the ill look instantly disappeared. ‘I’m sorry, darling,’ he stood up to come over and put his arm about her shoulders. ‘Jordan explained to me that a baby is a sensitive subject to you right now, that he’d already been unreasonable about it by asking you to start a family straight away. I agree with you, darling, eighteen is far too young to be a mother.’
Anger blazed within her at Jordan’s excuse for her behaviour to her father. How dared he make it seem that she was the one who objected to having a family when he was the one—! ‘Much too young, Daddy,’ she agreed tightly.
Over lunch Kelly was brittlely gay, fooling her father, but not fooling Jordan for a moment. She ignored his studied glances, and talked happily to her father, leaving the house as soon as her father had gone to his room to rest.
‘Where are you going?’ Jordan caught up with her just as she was getting into her car.
‘Into town.’ She got in behind the wheel, fastening her seat-belt. ‘I told you I was going out.’
Jordan still held the car door open. ‘Where are you going? And don’t say into town again. I want to know exactly where in London you’re going.’
Kelly looked up at him with glittering violet eyes. ‘I’m going to see Maggie. I take it you do remember Maggie?’
His mouth twisted. ‘Very well.’
Kelly’s expression was one of taunting enjoyment. ‘I can see that you do.’
‘We always disliked each other intensely.’
‘Yes,’ she agreed with satisfaction.
‘I take it that’s why you choose to visit her. You can both sit and agree what a selfish bastard I am. I think that was what she called me the last time we met.’
Kelly frowned. ‘When was that? I don’t remember it ever coming to an exchange of abuse.’
‘That’s because you weren’t here. It was after you did your disappearing act. She didn’t realise you’d left me.’
‘I see. And she called you—that?’
‘Yes,’ Jordan confirmed. ‘So you should have an enjoyable afternoon.’
She smiled. ‘It would appear so. I’ll be back in time for dinner. She looked pointedly at his hand resting on the open door. ‘Would you mind?’
‘Certainly,’ and he stepped back.
Kelly’s mouth tightened as the familiar red Mini came down the driveway. ‘Your—secretary has arrived,’ she told Jordan tightly.
He smiled. ‘So she has.’
‘I’m so glad you won’t be lonely.’ Kelly’s sarcasm was unmistakable.
‘I’m never that, not unless I choose to be.’
‘I can believe that,’ she snapped, slamming the car door and accelerating swiftly out of the driveway, nodding cool acknowledgement of Janet Amery’s friendly wave. No doubt the other woman would enjoy her afternoon alone with Jordan.
Kelly’s foot went down harder on the accelerator. So Maggie had seen Jordan after she had left him? Strange that she had never mentioned the meeting. Maybe she just hadn’t wanted to upset her.
Maggie had been her friend since schooldays, the daughter of a rich American cattle baron and his English wife, and she had been sent to England for her education. Maggie had found England more to her liking, hating her father’s ranch and all the hard work that went with it. Apparently her father had been hoping for a boy, and when it was found his wife could have no more children he had brought Maggie up to follow in his footsteps, insisting she learn the workings of the ranch from the bottom up. Maggie had stuck it for a year before coming back to England and staying. Unlike Kelly she had never married, although she never lacked for partners.
Jordan had taken an instant dislike to the other girl, claiming she was far too free and easy with her favours. He refused to meet Maggie socially, and if Kelly had wanted to see her friend she had always had to meet her at a restaurant or at Maggie’s flat. That Maggie disliked Jordan too she didn’t even try to hide, and Kelly had found their animosity disturbing.
When she called Maggie the other girl was luckily able to take time out from her freelance fashion designing to meet Kelly for afternoon tea. They hadn’t seen each other for months, and Kelly’s mood lightened as soon as she saw the vivaceous Maggie enter the restaurant. Auburn hair, feathered into curling tendrils down her back, deep brown eyes fringed by dark lashes, a snub nose sprinkled lightly with freckles, her mouth wide and smiling, Maggie was one of the most naturally beautiful women Kelly had ever seen. She wore her self-designed clothes with a grace that drew attention to their flamboyant lines. At the moment she had on a tiered dress in blue and purple, the bodice very tight, but suiting her tiny bust. She had the model’s perfect figure, and Kelly had often envied her her tall lissom body and slender curves.
‘Kelly!’ Maggie launched herself into her arms, finally moving back to hold her at arm’s length. ‘My, you’re looking well!’
Kelly smiled back at her. ‘So are you.’
‘I heard about your father,’ Maggie sobered. ‘But I only got back from the States yesterday, and when I called the house they refused to tell me where you were. I’m so glad you called this afternoon or I might have had to go to the police.’
Kelly bit her lip. ‘There’s a reas
on for the secrecy.’
Maggie’s brown gaze sharpened. ‘Do tell! It sounds as if it might be interesting.’
The whole story came out, haltingly at first, and then in a rush. ‘So now we just have to wait,’ she finished with a sigh.
‘And in the meantime you’re having to live with Jordan?’ Maggie sounded scandalised.
Kelly laughed at her expression. ‘He is still my husband, Maggie,’ she smiled.
‘You mean you and he—that you—you’re back, together?’ Maggie wrinkled her nose in disgust.
‘No!’ Kelly’s voice was sharp. ‘No, I don’t mean that. I was just pointing out that there’s no legal reason why we shouldn’t be living together.’
‘I don’t suppose the legalities of it would have bothered Jordan, anyway.’
‘I don’t suppose they would.’ Jordan had always been a law unto himself.
‘He probably wouldn’t even have got married if he could have got you any other way.’
‘Maggie!’ Kelly gasped.
‘Well, would he?’
‘I don’t know, maybe not,’ she accepted dully.
‘You always were naïve, Kelly.’ Maggie helped herself to one of the delicately cut sandwiches they had ordered with their tea, biting into it hungrily. Maggie was always hungry, was one of those people who could eat and eat and not put on a pound. ‘Now, me, I would have just slept with him and saved myself all that heartache.’
‘At the time I didn’t realise there would be all that heartache.’ Kelly ignored the sandwiches and cakes, just sipping her tea.
‘Jordan isn’t the sort of man for the “happy ever after” scene,’ Maggie scorned. ‘He likes a brief affair, and then it’s over.’
Kelly bristled with indignation, for once Maggie’s condemnation of Jordan irritating her. ‘Considering you don’t even like my husband you profess to know a lot about him,’ she snapped.
‘Oh dear,’ Maggie drawled, sounding very American in that moment. ‘Have I roused the slumbering tiger?’
‘What do you mean?’ Kelly asked curtly.
‘I always remember at school,’ Maggie helped herself to another sandwich, ‘it took a lot to make you angry, you were always such a quiet little thing, and yet when your temper did go you usually roared, as you’re doing now.’
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