by Anna Todd
Now, here I am sitting at a table full of people I love and admire—and I’m married.
I’m in college and I’m married. Married to a beautiful, successful, sharp, and feisty woman. She’s sitting next to me, talking to my mom about the whipping cream and gluten-free something or other.
Hardin is seated on the other side of me, and he’s looking straight ahead at Tessa, who’s standing next to a table filled with wedding guests.
“How’s it going?” I ask him. I remove my arm from around my bride’s back and take her hand in mine. She turns to look at me, gives me a kiss on the cheek, and turns back to talk to my mom.
Hardin looks up at me and fusses with his hair. “Bleh.” He half smiles. “How is it going for you? Do you feel any different now that you’re legally bound to one person for the rest of your life . . . well, barring a divorce.”
I roll my eyes. “Aren’t you a ball of sunshine?”
He cracks a smile for me, and I watch him panic as he loses sight of Tessa in the crowd. He sits up a little further in his chair, and his eyes scan the room.
“She’s there, by the door,” I say.
He relaxes and rests his eyes on her. Ken hands Abby to her, and Tessa giggles when Abby pulls her hair. I look over to the next table and see Stausey taking a selfie with her wineglass. Todd and Amir are on either side of her. Amir is dressed in a suit, and the color of his tie is the color of Nora’s eyes. I wonder if that’s why Nora chose that tie for him. I hope so.
Things have been slowly working themselves out since the divorce. She stayed executor of his estate and in charge of the legal and medical parts of his life. He’s become a pretty big part of my life, too, and through her stories about their adventures, I feel like I know him as well. Helping take care of him has also made me consider doing a master’s in Special Education after I graduate. It will mean more college, more student-loan debt, but I have a feeling I would be great at it.
Stausey straightens out Amir’s tie, and I turn my attention back to my stepbrother sitting next to me. “What are you two going to do?”
Hardin sighs, and I tighten my grip on my bride’s hand. My mom laughs, and Hardin brings his fingers to his mouth. Tugging on his lips, he says, “Get married.”
“Really? Does she know that?” I ask, raising my brow.
I’m positive that Tessa doesn’t know much about this plan. I heard her practicing what to say to him in the bathroom last night before bed. I feel bad because she has no privacy now that the three of us live together, but the two women seem to love the arrangement. I had asked my wife—I still can’t get over how that sounds—if she wanted me to ask Tessa to move out since we were getting married soon, but she told me over and over that she loves having Tessa around.
I sort of suspect that both of us just know that she doesn’t have anywhere else to go.
“Yep. Why not? You two did it, and you haven’t even known each other as long as I’ve known Tess.”
He has a point there. “Yes. But you two aren’t even dating. I think you’re skipping a step, perhaps.”
Hardin grins at me—his plotting grin takes over his whole face. “The order of the steps isn’t important. Either way, we end up the same place.”
He lifts his glass and I raise mine.
A few more summers and winters later . . .
“Mommy!” Addy’s voice is always high-pitched when she wants something.
My wife strides into the room with her hands full. Her face is flushed, she has the phone to her ear, and I feel sorry for whoever is on the end of that call. But her voice changes from irritated to soothing when she talks to her mini-me. “What, baby?”
My little monster crosses her arms over her chest. “Daddy said I can’t have any more cake.”
Nora looks at me, unable to keep a straight face. “How much did he let you eat? You know we have dinner with your aunt and uncle in two hours, and you still have homework to do.”
“Well”—Addy’s pouty little lips turn up—“you shouldn’t make so much if I can’t eat it.”
I burst into laughter and try to cover my mouth when my wife glares at me.
Then the little devil tattles on me. “Dad said so, too.”
“I did not!” I lie.
Both girls ignore me.
“Addy, no more cake.” My wife’s tone leaves no room for negotiation. “Go brush your teeth and finish your homework.”
Addy saunters off and disappears down the hallway, her long, wavy brown hair swishing back and forth.
When I look back to my wife, her hands are empty and she’s reaching for me. I pull her into my lap and she straddles my waist.
“Stop feeding her sugar before every meal.” She kisses my lips.
“Stop making so many cakes if we can’t eat them.” I shrug, and Nora playfully slaps at my chest. Her hair is so long that it brushes against my legs when she shakes her head.
Her mouth presses to mine and she wraps her arms around the back of my neck. “I missed you today.” She tells me this every day during the school year.
“Someone has to teach our heathens,” I say against her mouth. “I missed you, baby.”
She takes my face between her open hands. “I’m filming again tomorrow. They just told me they need another take.”
I sigh, trying not to throw a tantrum. She’s been working so much lately, and I feel like I barely see my wife. “What happened now?”
She taps her index finger against my lips. “Someone dropped the cake before the last few frames. This is what happens when they use real cakes for commercials.”
“Isn’t that the point?” I remember the faux cupcakes from last weekend. The wedding cake was real and so was the couple on the screen. But when they called “Cut!” and the shoot was over, I grabbed one of the stupid cupcakes and nearly chipped a tooth. The director made Nora decorate the fake cupcakes and everything. Then again, they pay her more for one day than she makes doing two weddings.
“One day, I’ll quit my job and you’ll homeschool all of our babies, and we can do this all day.” She rubs her breasts against my chest.
I softly push her back. “And what would that teach our babies?” I tease my tongue along her jaw. She pushes her breasts to me again, begging for me to touch them.
“Not yet, little one,” I whisper behind her ear, and she squirms in my arms.
“The kids would learn how to love their spouse. And to bake. We will have the perfect little army of loving chefs behind us.” Her eyes light up with amusement, and I run my fingers through her long silky hair. “That’s it! We can travel the country baking and teaching. We would never have to work in an office again.”
I kiss at her neck, imagining her in the middle of the country, only dirt and wind around us. Somehow, I don’t think she is thinking too far in advance about this.
“Shh.” I kiss her cheek. “Shh, my city girl. You wouldn’t last a day out there in the land of no offices and corn.”
She begins to challenge me, but our daughter comes barreling down the hallway with a pink hairbrush matted into her hair. “Mommy!” she screams.
Nora jumps off my lap. “Your turn,” Nora says to me, biting at my lip just as our daughter enters the room. Between the chaos of my daughter growing up too fast and my wife trying not to laugh, my heart swells and I am the luckiest SOB in the world.
Sometimes it’s tragedy that binds us with another. The bond feels unbreakable, but sometimes in between the tears and the ache of a dull knife carving the painful memories into you, you can find a spark of light. The tiniest of sparks can ignite to fire with just a touch of happiness. The light can burn out the darkness, and when there’s nothing but ashes and a fire, you learn a new kind of bond. One that blazes brighter than the sun.
acknowledgments
SOOOO, WHEN I FIRST TOLD my readers on Wattpad that I was going to write a book about Landon (Liam back then), I was almost finished with After 3 on Wattpad. I wrote Landon’s wedding scene, but
his bride didn’t have a face. It was the weirdest thing. No matter how many times I tried to force her to have a face, she refused. I kept thinking about how he met her, who she was, how they got there—but still she had no face. Details started to fall into place, but not her identity. It drove me crazy, and I couldn’t wait to find out who she was. But when I started to write it, my head got more and more cloudy. When I finished Nothing More, there still wasn’t clarity. The characters took control of my story, like they always have, and I love that. So, just like you, I didn’t know who she was until I typed the words. Thank you all for loving Landon the way I do.
Adam Wilson: This is our sixth—well, seventh with Imagines—book together, and with each book you continue to amaze and impress me with your patience and willingness to try new things and let me do things (somewhat) my way. I am so grateful to you for being so willing to help me figure out what was missing, which I saw was Wattpad, and you went to bat for me and trusted me to do something different. I feel like all of these acknowledgements are always the same, but you should hear these things more often than just in the back of a book. Good luck with everything, and I’m excited for Gallery 13 and all the awesomeness I know you’ll continue to trail-blaze.
Kristin Dwyer: Dude!!! You’re the best, and I really, really, really appreciate everything you do for me. You keep me on track and make me laugh. I heart you a lot.
Ashleigh Gardner: Thanks for helping me navigate through the massive publishing world. I’m still not getting an agent, unless it’s you ;)
Aron Levitz: My unicorn friend, I’m happy to be your bunny emoji friend. You’re awesome and fancy and you made me fancier than I was. Thank you for being a friend and keeping me grounded *eye roll * and for always being there to brainstorm and conquer with. I know you’re only using me to get to my husband, but I’m okay with that.
Paul O’Halloran: Paul! I don’t even know where to start. I feel like you work harder for me than even I do. You do so, so much, and I really appreciate you being on top of the world, literally. I wouldn’t be able to keep up with all the traveling, the translations, the madness, if it wasn’t for you!
Chels, Lauren, Bri, and Trev: You guys were so essential to this book and my life in general :P I’m so lucky to have the four of you as my closest friends. You mean so much to me, and I love you for sending me Nick Jonas gifs.
Ursula: I feel like this is always the same :P But you are still my BFF, my assistant, and my brain. We’ve made so many amazing memories this year, and I can’t wait for more. Thanks for not trying to steal Miles from me lololol.
Sales and Production: Thank you for working so hard on such short deadlines! I owe you all a drink—or nine.
My readers are the most important thing to me, and I still thank you every day for my life being what it is now. Now that I know how it is to be able to live my dream, I never ever want to stop.
JD WITKOWSKI
ANNA TODD is a writer spending her days in Austin, Texas, with her husband. She has always been an avid reader and boy band and romance lover, so now that she’s found a way to combine the three, she’s enjoying living a real-life dream come true. She now knows what life is like when you get to do what you love. She also has a thing for things that begin with T’s: Tom Hanks, TOMS, Target...
Find her at AnnaTodd.com, on Twitter at @imaginator1dx, on Instagram at @imaginator1d, and on Wattpad as Imaginator1D.
FOR MORE ON THIS AUTHOR: authors.simonandschuster.com/Anna-Todd
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BOOKS BY ANNA TODD
After
After We Collided
After We Fell
After Ever Happy
Before
Nothing More
Nothing Less
SHORT STORIES IN IMAGINES
“Medium”
“An Unlikely Friend”
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Gallery Books
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This book is a work of fiction. Any references to historical events, real people, or real places are used fictitiously. Other names, characters, places, and events are products of the author’s imagination, and any resemblance to actual events or places or persons, living or dead, is entirely coincidental.
Copyright © 2016 by Anna Todd
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First Gallery Books trade paperback edition December 2016
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Cover design by Damonza
Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data is available.
ISBN 978-1-5011-3084-7
ISBN 978-1-5011-3085-4 (ebook)