She would go after him, stop him, she thought, even if she had to crawl across the floor like a child.
If only she could find her voice, she thought, frenzied by her urgent need to do so, she would call him back, and then, she would plead with him to stay. But no matter how diligently she focused on the shaping of her lips, on trying to force the air from her lungs in a manner that would produce the words she so desperately needed to utter, no sound issued forth from her lips, and then, she knew that he was gone.
How could he leave me again? Her heart wailed, and piteously, her brain held no reply.
Distraught beyond bearing, Ebrielle retreated into the darkest abyss of her mind, cowering helplessly in the face of her acute anguish, deep within the hidden recesses of her thoughts.
It was a place of solitude, though not of peace, where she neither heard, nor felt, anything.
Cutting herself off from all sense of knowing was her only recourse for survival, she knew, for this was a place she had been once before.
Desolate and lost, and once again without a reason to care, she pushed away memories and feelings and thoughts, preferring the eerie silence of nothingness to the pain of knowing at all, but somehow, some way, his words from the evening before found their way into her private place, haunting her with the very depths of his need...
Please wake for me, love.
Ebrielle tried to block the anguish she had heard in his words, tried to ignore the plea in his tone, but found that she could not.
For the love of God, Ebrielle... I need you...the memory whispered, and she knew it was the same for her. She needed Ananias like fire needed flame.
Aye, she needed him.
They needed each other.
So very much.
But he was gone.
And she felt so very alone without him.
It was then that Ebrielle realized she was crying.
Chapter Ten
Ananias's trip to London had been all too brief.
He had been home at Avenleah Downes for a full day now, yet he still had not gone to visit Ebrielle.
James had advised that his next visit be one in which he would begin the process again, where he would start over from the beginning and hope this second time around brought more progress than the first, but he was divided. He felt guilty. And his heart refused to let the matter lie.
Not for having tempted Ebrielle to awaken, and not even for wanting her, but for allowing his own selfish needs, wants, and desires to lead him down a path that would only take her choices away.
When she woke – and he refused to continue to believe in the possibility that she may not – she deserved to be allowed to choose the man with whom she would spend the rest of her life. She deserved a man she could love, did love, and who would love her in return, forever.
His fear, the fear that was keeping him from going straightaway to her side was that, once she learned the truth about why he had come to her, had courted her in her sleep, he would not be that man.
Another day passed, and then another, until finally, Ananias could stay away no longer. But he would not go to her for the same reasons as he had gone before, he decided. This time, he would tell her the truth ...and he would set her free.
* * *
The ride to Clermont House seemed to take longer than he remembered, and when he finally did arrive, he wanted nothing more than to mount up and leave again. How could he face her now, knowing what he had done, had planned to do, and how knowing it would hurt her?
Anxiety dogged his footsteps all the way to her day chamber. At the door, he paused, steeling himself for what was to come, for what he knew he had to do, and against the pain of knowing when it was done, he would walk away.
Pushing open her chamber door, he stepped inside, and was immediately stricken by the sight of her. She was changed, somehow, from when he last had seen her. There were dark circles beneath her eyes which had not been there before, and her complexion seemed sallow. Had she fallen ill?
Making his way swiftly to her bedside, he leaned close, watching her breathe for a moment before he put a palm to her brow to check for fever, but thankfully, there was none.
“Ebrielle? I'm back,” he whispered. “But only for a moment. I've some things I must tell you.”
Drawing in a breath, he straightened, and then began to explain. He told her why he had gone away two years ago. He told her why he had stayed away. And then, he told her what had happened when he returned.
“So you see, love, I found myself in dire need of an heiress. When your father came to me, I believed a courtship intended to wake you from the peculiar sleep into which you had fallen would be best – for all of us.”
He was silent for a moment, trying to find a way to explain precisely why he had had a change of heart, and the only answer he could find was that he had fallen in love with her all over again. But how could he tell her that, when the entire reason he had come back was to release her from her father's promise, to free her, to let her choose.
“You deserve more, Ebrielle. So much more. Twice now your father has promised you to a man who wanted you for his own selfish reasons, and I know it is your duty as his daughter to do as he wishes, but...I would like to give you the opportunity to choose. To follow your heart, to...” He paused, looking away from her because to see her made him wish for things he had no right to desire. Shaking his head, he continued.
“To marry because you are in love – not because some prince needs a beautiful wife with which to impress his court or because a suddenly destitute earl has need of your dowry. Ebrielle, I...”
He leaned his head back against his shoulders and closed his eyes. He sighed. “I just want you to be happy.”
Finished now, he did not chance another look at her before he headed toward the door. He had almost reached it when a hoarsely uttered word quietly whispered into the achingly hollow silence made him stop.
“Ananias?”
Turning on his heel, he glanced toward the bed, and straightened in surprise for, lying there with her eyes open, one hand extended in quiet supplication while a world of emotion swirled in the brilliant blue of her gaze, Ebrielle de Clercy breathed his name into the quiet of the room, the single word a hushed appeal for so many things she hadn't yet the words to say.
"Ananias..."
She tried to rise, to sit up and, his shock at turning to find her awake at last swiftly forgotten, he rushed to her side to assist her in doing so but the minute his hand touched hers, she pulled him close to whisper, “I love you, Ananias. Only you.”
Her fingers sought his cheek, and from there, trailed down to trace the fullness of his lips while her eyes, oh, her beautiful eyes! Ananias thought he might drown in the vast blue of her gaze and he could not find the strength nor the desire to care.
“I fear that I may die without you, Ananias,” she confessed at last. “Please do not leave me again.”
And with her plea still quivering on her lips, she tilted her head forward and kissed him.
* * *
They were married in the small stone chapel at Avenleah Downes.
Immediately after an extended honeymoon trip to Europe, the earl and his new countess spent three weeks in Kent seeing to renovations at Aventry Hall. Ananias had insisted that his grandmother move onto one of his lesser estates and once she had removed herself to a modest cottage near the sea, Moira and Lydia had joined them for a visit.
Soon after, they traveled to London, where Ananias proudly squired Ebrielle to every ball, house party, and fete to which he could wrangle an invitation, and then back home again, where the countess of Aventry scandalously dressed herself in men's clothing to race one of Ananias's prized thoroughbreds against Marquess Temberton in a private challenge which took place at Avenleah Downes.
To the surprise of everyone except Ananias, she won.
Ananias took far too much pleasure in pleasing his beautiful wife during the months after their marriage, and though the ea
rl and his new countess wiled away many an hour together in the quiet solitude of the master suite at Avenleah Downes, frequently becoming quite suddenly “indisposed to company,” the one thing neither of them courted there was sleep.
About the Author
Leighann Dobbs discovered her passion for writing after a twenty year career as a software engineer. She lives in New Hampshire with her husband Bruce, their trusty Chihuahua mix Mojo, and beautiful rescue cat, Kitty. When she’s not reading, gardening, or selling antiques, she likes to write romance and cozy mystery novels and novelettes which are perfect for the busy person on the go.
Find out about her latest historical romance books and how to get discounts on them by signing up at: http://www.leighanndobbs.com/historical-romance-books . Connect with Leighann on Facebook and Twitter http://facebook.com/leighanndobbsbooks and http://twitter.com/leighanndobbs
Fancytales: The Once Upon A Time Collection Page 24