Lee narrowed his eyes. “What exactly is this grant for?”
“I told you it’s a government grant for research I will be heading up at Caltech.”
“Yes, but what exactly are you researching?”
First, she didn’t really want to spend the short amount of time they probably had with Kendra on the line discussing the work she wouldn’t start until fall. Second, it would take her a while to figure out how to explain it without invalidating her confidentiality clause. So instead, she couldn’t resist answering in the simple way that had infuriated her several times so far this week. “Sorry. Classified.”
The way his eyes popped, his mouth opened to object and finally transformed into a beaming smile, validated her word choice.
Kendra’s laugh rang in her ears. “You probably don’t realize it, but you sound just like Lee. Which leads me to a final bit of news.”
“Yes?” Lee asked.
“The adoption agency Audrey’s parents used burned down so we didn’t find any leads there. And, disturbingly, the one I was adopted from mistakenly got demolished.”
“What?” Her gut dropped. Would they never know how they’d been split up?
“A contractor insisted his orders from the city were to demolish it, but he was actually supposed to demolish the old parks and rec center that was on its last legs. The charges were dropped, though, when they found his orders really did list the adoption agency address.”
“Weird coincidence,” Lee said.
“I don’t believe in coincidence.” Kendra’s voice rang in her ears at the same time Audrey said it. If they had timed it, they couldn’t have spoken in unison so perfectly.
Lee’s eyes widened. “Whoa.”
“We found out right away your blood type is the same, but given the adoption agency drama, the Bureau did a rush on our DNA tests, as well.” Kendra’s voice shook a little.
Audrey’s breath caught. “Do you have the results?”
“If we weren’t sure before, we are now. We are definitely twins. Identical. So uh...hi, sister.”
Audrey’s throat tightened, and her eyes pricked. “Hi, sis.” She smiled at Lee as her vision turned blurry. She looked away to regain control. She really had a sister, a flesh-and-blood sister. It wasn’t a sudden shock like the night they’d met on the campus, but to have scientific proof overwhelmed her.
“You might be happy to know I’m utilizing my time stuck in the hospital working out who might be our biological parents.”
Audrey’s gut churned. “Do you... Do you have any leads?” She thought she’d get out of here, spend a little time with Kendra, visit her parents and deliver the news in person that she had a twin, and then, after weeks of processing, she might allow herself to start to think about her biological parents.
A picture of Kendra being take-charge, plow-ahead, always confident of each step, came into focus. To be fair, Audrey was also that type of person, except only within the confines of the lab. Maybe because taking wrong turns was essential to the process of good research. She always learned from failure. Yet, here, in the world of agents and threats, each wrong step likely resulted in someone dying. She turned to watch Lee’s reaction as she asked, “Can I assume you were told about Sylvia’s death?”
“That’s a swift change of subject,” Kendra remarked.
“Yes, I know. And I’m happy to help with the search for our parents after we are both safely out of danger.”
“Lee didn’t tell me per se, but I’m aware.”
“So you know that if she hadn’t died, our cover would’ve been blown? That she knew I wasn’t you?”
“What?” Kendra spoke so loudly that Lee and Audrey both flinched and grabbed their ears. “Tell me exactly what happened. The only way this mission is going to work is if you can pull off being me.”
“Exactly. And without a little briefing from you, I’m flying blind.” Audrey recounted every detail she could remember about the conversation before dinner until Sylvia’s ghastly death.
“Stop. You actually said ‘Is there something you’d like to launder?’”
“Not word for word, but yes, that was the jist. What’s wrong with that?”
“Why don’t you wear a sign that says shoot me?”
“Oh, that’s really helpful.” Audrey bit her lip. She never snapped at people like that, but for some reason the interchange almost made her smile. Was this the way real sisters bantered?
She cast a side glance at Lee, who seemed to be watching her with concern. “Take it easy, Kendra. You have no idea what she’s gone through or the sacrifice she’s making to do this for us.”
“Listen, Audrey,” Kendra said as if she never heard Lee. “Your job as an agent, especially an agent like me, is to talk as little as possible. Do whatever it takes to get them to do all the heavy lifting. Keep your answers brief and always turn it back to them. Make them work for it. Criminals, when it comes down to it, are lazy. The smart ones are the laziest, and you, Mrs. Kimmet have always been one of the smartest. So to answer your question, I would’ve told Sylvia that if she wanted something, to spell it out. I would never, ever, talk about laundering anything. That’s none of their business how I go about doing what I do. The proof is in the results. They get their clean money, and they let me worry about how to do it. And in case you need me to spell it out for you, I don’t ever do it. We’re pretending and using FBI funds to get it done until we can nab these guys.” Kendra sighed. “I guess I got a little worked up, but you get the idea?”
“Yes.” The word came out soft. Truth was she only half heard everything Kendra said. Her skin had electrified at Lee’s concern, and the way his eyes softened. The space between them, sharing an adapter with the ocean far below them and the blue sky above them... Audrey straightened, trying to snap out of it. “Actually, Lee, do you mind if I talk to Kendra out here alone for a bit? Sister stuff.” She almost choked on the last two words. They felt so foreign.
Lee’s soft eyes remained on her face for another second before he nodded, took out the wired earbuds and slid open the glass door to enter the cottage. The moment Audrey was certain the door closed, she asked the burning question that could either continue to conflict her heart or break it. “Have you at any time had feelings for Lee or vice versa?”
* * *
Lee made it a point not to need anyone in his life, but to discover his partner didn’t need him, either, shifted his confidence and produced a hollow feeling in his gut that didn’t make sense. In his mind, the Bureau needed him as much as they needed Kendra. But it was as if she’d received the most valuable player award in their partnership.
The harsh reality was Lee had refused to allow anyone to need him. He hadn’t been law enforcement yet when Derek had been shot, but there was a part of Lee that always felt like he’d let him down.
Was that why he found himself drawn to Audrey? Because she needed him? No. When she’d said she needed him at the restaurant it only annoyed him. Pathetic. He should be ashamed of himself for even entertaining the slightest feelings for her. She had no interest. What she needed was for him to do his job and keep her safe, and so far he’d been doing poorly at that.
He’d get his head on straight and pretend she was exactly the same as Kendra, simply a coworker. It shouldn’t be hard to do since they were identical, though he had to admit, they looked completely different in many ways. Audrey’s eyes seemed to express so much emotion and intelligence. He had no doubt she would always be able to outthink him, something that was a little intimidating. Even the way she smiled somehow radiated kindness.
Lee sank on the couch. He had a serious problem. He was falling for her.
“So you’re telling me you never had any feelings for Lee?” Audrey’s voice wafted into the living room.
Lee sat up straight as a rod. The window was slightly ajar and picking up bits of the phon
e conversation on the balcony.
Lee jumped to standing, his blood pumping. They were talking about him.
“I think it’s absolutely realistic to be in love if you’re married, pretend or not. My parents are,” Audrey said heatedly. “But...back to my question.”
“Like a brother? Seriously?” Audrey asked. “Fair enough, but did Lee ever have feelings for you?”
His neck heated. Surveillance often involved overhearing private conversations that had no bearing on your mission, but Lee had never been privy to one about himself, even accidentally. While he knew the answer to Audrey’s question, he did wonder what Kendra would say.
Lee crossed to the window as Audrey said, “Oh. To be fair, some people could call that logical and self-controlled. I actually like that about him.”
Lee cringed. Kendra must be complaining about him, but he didn’t know how he felt about Audrey defending him. He gave the window a small shove but it didn’t budge.
Audrey sighed loudly. “I wouldn’t dare entertain the possibility if there was any chance you or him—You know what, never mind. Let’s just pretend we didn’t have this conversation.”
Lee’s chest tightened as he found a latch propping the window open and tried again. The closed window finally blocked any words being said outside. His emotions felt like they’d been forced to board a roller-coaster ride with no end in sight. Her last words to Kendra echoed in his mind. If only he could pretend she didn’t have that conversation, too.
He sat back down and twisted the lid off a water bottle. The lukewarm water didn’t bother him much as he gulped the liquid down, trying to distract his thoughts. The sound of the glass door opening caught his attention. He looked over his shoulder and Audrey had stepped inside, beckoning him with one hand. He joined her, wordlessly, on the balcony.
Despite everything he’d heard, he suddenly felt lighter being with her.
Audrey had the most welcoming smile, the kind a man wanted to come home to every night after work. And now he knew the chemistry he’d felt wasn’t one-sided. His heart pounded faster at the knowledge while his head screamed to turn it off. The mission always came first. But after that...
His shoulders dropped as he sat down in the chair and allowed a second to take in the view. He would still be an undercover agent and once she got back into the world of academia, she’d realize he didn’t belong in her world. Lee lifted the earbuds. He wanted to be done with this conversation and get the mission over with. “The longer we talk the more we risk being overheard,” he said into the microphone. “What is it?”
“Just got a message. Your identification request came in. One Felicity Lewis, CIA. Apparently, CIA just requested your identification, as well.”
He knew it had to be a different agency, but CIA? “They have no jurisdiction here.”
“Foreign-intelligence collection mission. The special agent in charge in the San Francisco office is in dialogue with CIA and DHS, telling them to stand down. Waiting on a response.”
Audrey’s face lost its color. She leaned back in the chair without comment.
“Okay. We’re going silent now.” Lee signed off and turned to Audrey, resisting the instinct to lean over and reach for her. “Hey. Are you okay?”
“It’s a weird feeling finding out your friend has been lying—about, well, everything—the entire time you’ve known her.” Her eyes flashed as she studied him. “Do you? Do you feel bad about doing that to people?”
No one had asked him that before. Not that he hadn’t thought about it. “They spend a fair amount of time preparing you for it in training. You can’t be a special agent without the potential for having to go undercover. Deep cover, the kind that lasts for years like what Kendra and I have been doing, does take a toll.”
Lee tilted his head side to side, stretching out the tension. “I am called to protect our citizens. Maybe that sounds like I’m trying to be flippant about your question, but the way I see it, I’m submitting to our government authorities and doing my job.”
Audrey nodded, but Lee could tell he wasn’t addressing the real reasons she’d asked the question.
“This cover is my job, but I also need a life as much as any normal person. So I have to compartmentalize and it’s hard. My job requires me to develop relationships that I know I might have to eventually betray.” He leaned forward and gently picked up her hand before he addressed the heart of the matter. “I have a friend at the gym, closest to the firm. He doesn’t know my real last name and because my cover is a lawyer he knows he can’t ask me very much about my job.”
“Client confidentiality?”
“Exactly. But in regard to me as a person, I can still be real. I feel like he’s a real friend when we discuss sports or music.”
“You’re trying to tell me Felicity probably considered me a real friend, but you can’t know that.” Her eyes softened and drifted to their linked hands, but Lee couldn’t bring himself to pull away.
“You’re right. I don’t, but I can’t imagine knowing you and not wanting to be your friend.” Lee wasn’t the type to get embarrassed, but he’d never heard such corny words come out of his mouth. His hand slipped from hers and he stood. “We better get ready. We need to grab a bite for lunch because our revised itinerary includes an afternoon tee time. The way things are going, I imagine another visit from a network official. Hopefully, we are almost done with these little meetings.”
“Like porcelain cups and cucumber sandwiches?”
He laughed. “Not exactly. Tee time as in hitting a small white ball.”
She shook her head. “I can’t golf.”
“That makes two of us. Let’s hope the meeting is at the first hole.”
An hour later Lee returned to the room wearing the loudest paisley sweater vest from the gift shop. Golf outfits seemed to suit Audrey, though, as she waited on the couch in a dusty-rose, elbow-length polo and a skirt covered in gray and pink octagons. She glanced down self-consciously. “I’m glad Kendra had already packed clothes for golfing. Everything in the resort shop is ghastly.” She nodded at his vest in confirmation, her lips twisted in amusement.
“Are you saying you’re embarrassed to be seen with me?”
She stood. “Never.”
And somehow, he felt she meant it. He took a step closer. Face-to-face, he rested his hands on her shoulders. “Audrey?” His throat tightened momentarily as she looked up at him, the soft smile on her lips, and all he could think about was what it would be like to kiss her.
TEN
The temperature in the living room seemed to rise ten degrees at the way he’d said her name.
Audrey felt nothing but the heat from the palms of Lee’s hands on her shoulders. She’d yet to allow herself to imagine she and Lee could have a real future until she’d heard from Kendra there wasn’t a past or present romance to worry about. She held her breath, not daring to move as Lee took a small step toward her. Was she imagining things or was he about to kiss her?
They may not have known each other very long, but in all her years of feeling out of place no matter where she was, Lee made her feel like she belonged at his side. The news about Felicity had thrown her for yet another loop, but she appreciated Lee’s vulnerability, sharing what it’d been like to serve his country while never being allowed to truly let anyone know the real him.
She’d like to think he felt he could be himself around her, as well. The sound of crashing waves against the rocks hundreds of feet below filtered through the walls. The soft ticking of the clock on the mantel was the only way she knew that time hadn’t come to a standstill. “Yes?” she finally asked.
Lee blinked hard and dropped his hands as if he suddenly woke up. “I...uh...just wanted to tell you to be confident in your golf game. Even if you’re horrible, the confidence will make people believe you’re just having an off day.” He’d never looked so flust
ered as he backed up to the door. “We shouldn’t be late to tee time.”
If they left right now, they’d actually be fifteen minutes early, but the increasing space between them helped her thoughts clear. Her place was in academia and his was in the FBI. He’d be putting them both in danger if he started a secret relationship with her while in deep cover. Besides, she would never kiss a man if they didn’t have a potential future together. Not intentionally, at least.
They strode across the resort, this time abandoning the pretense of holding hands. With the little bit of extra time, they hit a few balls at the driving range—they were even worse at the game than Audrey imagined—before an employee approached Lee. “Your tee time is ready, sir.”
A gleaming black and burgundy golf cart pulled to a stop in front of them with cold bottled waters in the four-slot cup holder and sleeves of mixed nuts in the open console. The back of the cart held two golf bags stocked with shining, gleaming clubs. The employee held out two shiny keys. “Would you like to drive or would you like a driver and caddy?”
“Oh, I think driving would be fun, wouldn’t it, Lee?” she asked. Okay, maybe Kendra would’ve simply demanded, but she didn’t want a caddy watching their horrible golf strokes, especially if all the balls ended up in sand traps.
Lee nodded. “Whatever you want, honey.”
He may have added the term of endearment for the employee’s sake, but Audrey was certain she would never get used to it. The employee made his way toward the pro golf shop. Lee passed the keys to her. “You said you wanted to drive.”
“I was trying to avoid an audience on the course.” She didn’t return the keys, though. She’d never socialized in circles that golfed—obviously given her poor form—but that didn’t mean she didn’t want a turn driving. “Do you think that was a bad idea?”
“No. It’s likely the caddy would’ve wanted to give us lessons and we would’ve become gossip fodder in the break room. Besides, if there is supposed to be a meeting somewhere on the course, I imagine the caddy would be a deterrent.” Something in the distance caught his eye and Audrey spun to find another golf cart with their assigned bodyguard at the wheel. He lifted his chin as a way of greeting and approval to Audrey. As if they needed his clearance to proceed golfing.
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