She picks her eyes off the dirt and stares straight at him. Somehow, she finds him immediately, like she knows. And maybe she does. She's surprised to see him - he can't blame her; he must look ridiculous - but then she smiles and his heart explodes.
Before he knows it, he's in front of her with nothing to say. His hands are on his lips and all he's doing is staring at her. He realizes that perhaps love is too strong of a word to describe his feelings for her. He doesn't want to cheapen the already overused word but he has no other vocabulary in order to describe it. He wants to be around her always. He likes the sound of her voice and the curve of her smile, the curls of her hair and the freckles on her face. He likes the sound of her laugh and the way grease is buried under her fingernails.
But these are all physical things. These are things that are superficial and fade over time - except, perhaps, her laughter and her freckles.
He wants to know more about her. He wants to know who she is and what inspires passion. He wants to know the buttons to push to annoy her and what to say in order to make her laugh. He wants to know her birthday and where she's from and why she's here and why she decided to be a mechanic. He wants to know everything about her. He wants to know it all.
God, she's beautiful. And he feels like an idiot because he's smiling and staring and he can't think of anything coherent to say but he doesn't want her to leave.
"You kissed me," he finally says. Because there's nothing else. There's nothing else he can think about and it's driving him crazy.
She tilts her head to the side but the grin remains present on her face. She acknowledges his words with a nod. "I did," she says.
"Do you bestow each of your clients with a kiss once you're finished with your job?" he asks.
He's such an idiot. What is he asking? What is he doing? What is going on with him? He's a fool, that's what. She has reduced Isaac Stefano to a fool.
"That's none of your business," she tells him but she's still playful. She's still smiling. However, there is a look of confusion, a look of curiosity. "Is everything okay?"
"I..." He runs his fingers through his hair. He looks away, back at her. Finally, he says, "I don't want you to leave. Unless you have to. Unless you have somewhere else you need to be."
There. He's said it. He's honest and it's such a thrilling feeling - kind of like flying - because even though he's perfectly in control of himself and his body and his words, there's still that trust he places in his Rey, in her, to keep him alive, to keep him steady, to keep him from falling. The thing is, when it comes to Raya, he would fall to the bottom of the galaxy as long she promised she would be there at the bottom, waiting for him.
It's only when she speaks does he realize he's been holding his breath like he's some kind of child waiting for an answer. Maybe he doesn't have as much control over himself as he thinks. And maybe, just maybe, that's okay.
Her smile crinkles her eyes as she says, "No. I have nowhere else to be just yet."
"Good," he says. Inside, his heart is doing jumping jacks, spinning around like one does with a hula hoop, but on the outside, he's the cool, calm, collected pilot everyone expects him to be. "Good."
Reed
Reed doesn't know what's happening to him. All he knows is that they're walking back to their shack and they're holding hands and he can feel his lips throb from the kisses they had attacked each other with. There's a light flush on her skin and it makes her look both girlish and beautiful at the same time. Her hair falls everywhere. It's messy and curly and untamable and he loves it. He wants to touch it. He wants to mess it up even more.
They get back to the house quicker than he realizes. He doesn't let her hand go, even as he opens the door. He doesn't see the need to. There's a coldness in the air the rain has brought in. He likes the biting air, the pinching feeling he gets when he's cold. It's rare that he ever feels cold and he likes it when he is.
When the door shuts softly behind him, she pulls him to get close but not too close. There’s still space between, space he wants to widen, space he wants to make disappear. He's conflicted about this whole thing. His heart is in a war with his head and he's not sure who to listen to. So he doesn't listen to either. He knows he'll have to figure it out sooner or later but not right now. Right now, he'll just enjoy.
"So," she says. Their hands are still locked together and she doesn't let go so he doesn't let go.
"So."
He's not sure what else to say but he can't tell by her tone and the look on her face says that she wants a response from him so he gives her one. He'll give her practically anything she asks for.
"Did you like it?" she asks, tilting her head to the side.
"What?" he asks. He doesn't know what she means but he feels his cheeks turning red if she means what he thinks she means. "The kissing?"
She laughs and he feels relieved but he doesn't know why. "No," she says, shaking her head. "What I showed you. Did you like what I showed you?"
"Oh."
Reed feels himself blush, which is a strange feeling because Reed does not blush. There's no reason for him to. He plays it safe, keeps his guard up, doesn't let anyone in.
But Elise doesn't care about all of that. She doesn't care about the carefully constructed wall he's built around his heart. She takes out a torpedo and blows the bricks down in one shot. She climbs over the wall like she's a goddamn gorilla climbing a tree. She's the only person who can find the crack in his armor and slip through it and get to the other side. She's the only one with the ability to completely wreck him the way she has.
He doesn't even regret kissing her. That's what she does to him. Even though it's wrong and he's broken so many rules and he's ten years older than she is, he doesn't care. He kissed her and he doesn't regret it. He would kiss her again. Maybe. He hasn't had time to process any of this at all except the fact that he likes kissing her, he likes the feel of holding her hands, and she looks drop-dead gorgeous soaking wet.
He doesn't want to talk about the ruins. He doesn't particularly care about them right now. Not when she's soaking wet and he's staring at her like some sort of deity, like he's in awe of her and he's going to fall to his knees and worship the goddess that she is. But he's still guarded. He's still unsure. He doesn't know what this is and what this means and he doesn't want to do anything to ruin their friendship because it's all he has and it's everything he needs.
"You haven't answered my question," Elise says, her voice shy. Like she's worried she's done something wrong.
Sweet, foolish girl.
"Yeah."
He doesn't know what else to say. He feels like a jerk, like he's leading her on. Like he's playing with her. That's the last thing he intends to do. It's just, he's never been here before. He doesn't know how to handle this. He doesn't know what to do at all.
"Reed." Her voice is curt. Her blue eyes flash sapphire but he can detect worry behind the frustration. "What's wrong? You're quiet."
He's always quiet, but he knows what she means.
It's warm so she's not shivering but if it continues to stay this way, this silence hanging between them, something is going to shift. Something is going to happen.
"Look," she says. She always says look when she's about to ramble. He knows her too well. "About the kiss" -
"I liked it," he tells her. Because he doesn't want her to ramble. Because he wants her to know. "I like you too." But his guard is up, it's still up even though she's gotten through. "But." He doesn't say anything else. He doesn't need to.
She clenches her jaw, nods once. Her eyes descend to the floor. "But," she replies.
Raya
Raya knows if she smiles any harder, her entire face is going to break. It makes no sense whatsoever. Isaac is making her feel all of these things, similar to what a baby feels when they take their first bath or see rain for the first time. It's pleasant and soothing and makes her heart giddy with inexplicable excitement. But it's something she can't exactly explain and perhap
s that's okay.
"So," she says, "where are we going?"
"I..." Isaac cuts himself with a smile. He can't be sure but she swears he's blushing. It's hard to tell with his olive skin but it doesn't matter. His hands are shoved into his pockets and his eyes are almost bashful. It's adorable, if Raya's being honest, and she doesn't use such a word freely. "To be honest, I haven't thought that far in advance. I know I just want to be around you."
Raya feels her smile widen even more - what she thought was an impossible feat - and she shakes her head. "You're very charming," she tells him. "No wonder you're the most -sought-after pilot in the galaxy."
"I thought I was the best pilot in the galaxy," he says.
"You are a man of many talents," she points out, her eyes shining. "I'm sure you're capable of being both." She cocks her head to the side, her sparkle in the irises dimming a fraction. "I barely know you, Isaac. I mean, I'm familiar with who you are and that includes your reputation. Reputations stem from rumors but they always start off with a grain of truth. I like you. More than I probably should. But I have no intention of sleeping with you a couple of times until you're called away. I will not be forgotten or cast aside or used because I have no reason to use you. Such a relationship would not be mutually beneficial, at least on my end." She stops. She's burning with red but she's not sure why. She can't seem to look at him just yet so she clears her throat and continues on. "If you want to be friends and spend time together, let's be friends and spend time together. I'm not so sure we should be anything more if..."
He waits for her to finish her sentence but she has no idea what to say so she shrugs instead.
"If," he prompts her, pushing his brow up. "Seems to me you're making a lot of assumptions."
"Perhaps," she allows, finally looking up at him from the corner of her eye.
"Listen, Raya," he says. She finds she adores when he says her name. Like it's a promise. Like it's a song. Like it's meant to be said by his lips and his lips alone. "I mean it when I say I just want to be around you. Whether that means walking up and down this road a thousand times, if we go back to base, it doesn't matter to me."
Raya feels herself flush despite herself and she knows it has nothing to do with the gear. She swallows and looks away. She doesn't know what to think, what to feel. This is new and fast and she feels giddy at the prospect of the possibilities, of what this could mean. But she refuses to fall for someone unavailable, someone who will only leave at the end. She refuses to get hurt; especially by the likes of him. She should know better. She does, but...
"May I be frank with you?" she asks, flashing her eyes at him.
His smile curves up and he nods once. "Absolutely," he tells her. "It's what I prefer."
"You're a pilot, a good one," Raya tells him. It's easy to keep her eyes on him, easy to stay focused, easy to control her voice. She doesn't know why but she doesn't want to question the comfortable feeling that always surrounds her when she's around him. "You could get called on a mission and be gone in an instant. You wouldn't even be able to let me know. You also have opportunities to indulge in desires. Women and even men flock to pilots the way sheep flock to their herders. Considering the reputation you have, the one I happened to notice on base, let's not pretend you don't know these things."
Isaac eyes sparkle. "And you're worried what happened between me and Lola will happen to you and me," he states like he knows.
The problem is, he doesn't.
"No, actually." She smirks when she notices the surprise that flashes across his face, but just as quickly, it disappears. "I'm not worried in the slightest because I'm not Lola and I don't intend to sleep with you anytime soon. The difference between the two of us - and there are many, I assure you - is that I don't need to sleep with you to feel valuable no matter who you are. I like your company and I like looking at you and there's a part of me that would love nothing more than to sleep with you. But I barely know you. And having sex with someone I barely know while liberating isn't something I can do, personally. So I'll understand if you want to head back to base. There will be no hard feelings between us. I just want there to be honesty."
Isaac looks at her for a long moment, a small smile on his face. He surprises her when he reaches out and takes her hand in his. He turns it over so he can place a gentle kiss on the inside of her wrist.
"Like I said," he murmurs against her skin, "I just want to be around you."
Raya gets tingles everywhere on her body and when she nods, it's shaky. "Okay," she says. "I'm going home, then. Nina is making me dinner. You are welcome to attend if you aren't too intimidated meeting my guardian."
He scoffs at the insinuation. "I'm Isaac Stefano," he insists. "Nothing intimidates me."
Elise
Elise avoids Reed to the best of her abilities. She starts seeing Stan again - secretly, of course. It's not necessarily romantic but they're friends and it's her form of rebellion at Reed's rejection of her.
It sucks being rejected. It's not something she wants to go through again. Each time she thinks about it, her cheeks turn to fire and she inwardly cringes. She's never been rejected before. Maybe she can use this as a lesson and help her grow. Maybe she can stay in her room with her bottom lip jutted out and her arms crossed over her chest, pouting in darkness.
The thing is, she gets why he did it. She understands. But that doesn't mean she likes it. She doesn't think it's fair. She's being punished for being born into a family she didn't ask for, a family she doesn't even get to see. There may even be a chance she won't inherit the throne - the galaxy - if the rumors are true and her sister is actually alive. Why can't she just enjoy herself while they are able to? He feels a certain way about her. She has those same feelings for him. Why stay apart? Why punish themselves?
Maybe... Maybe he needs a push. Maybe he needs a reminder that he cares about her, more than just platonically, more than a guardian is supposed to care about his charge, especially since she's the most important charge. Royalty. A princess.
So that's what she would do. She would give him a push.
Stan shows up right on time, three days later. Elise does not tell Reed to expect him nor does she answer the door herself. She makes Reed answer it by pointedly ignoring the persistent knocking. She's in her room getting ready, which is why she doesn't greet Stan. What she does instead is slip into the hallway when she hears Reed's footsteps stomp to the front door. She wants to see his reaction. She wants to know how he feels when he opens the door and sees Stan.
She isn't disappointed.
Elise watches Reed's lip curl down into a frown as he opens the door slightly. She can't see Stan from where her position is, but she can see Reed's body tense and hunch over, like he's guarding his territory and doesn't trust any outsiders. Which is all true.
"What do you want?" he asks, his voice gruff. He wears a muscle shirt so his defined arms are long and visible, his tense posture intimidating.
Elise almost feels bad for Stan. Almost.
"I'm here to see Elise," she hears Stan say. "We're going to watch the sunset at Grove's Creek. She'll be expecting me."
There's a tense pause as Reed thinks about it. Elise holds her breath, pushing her back into the wall, pressing her lips together to keep from making any kind of noise. Is it wrong that she's smiling? Is it wrong that her heart beats in anticipation?
"You can go now," he finally says, and his tone is both firm and curt, leaving no room for argument.
"Actually," Elise says from her position. She makes no move to leave the hallway; she wants to give the impression that she's still getting ready, that she's putting a lot of effort into her appearance for this date.
Reed all but spins on the heel of his boot and burrows those midnight blue eyes in her direction. They're like glass, leaving little deadly scars across her skin. His brows push up, challenging her, waiting for her to continue. She clears her throat, her confidence shaken but would not be inhibited, especially when she's so clo
se, especially when it's obvious he's jealous.
"He asked me out on a date the other day and I accepted."
"And you didn't run this by me, why?" he asks. There's a flash if something in those eyes and it's gone just as quickly as it appears. But Elise recognizes it. It's hurt, maybe even a sense of betrayal. It's swallowed by anger, however.
Elise has to shift her weight before answering. She feels guilty for the hurt she's causing Reed. In all honesty, that's the last thing she would ever think he could feel because he's usually so strong, so sure of everything. She clenches her jaw and looks away, knowing that just because he appears this way doesn't mean that's what he really is. But she can't back down. She's in this and she has to follow it through.
"I didn't think I needed to," she says. "I'm of consenting age and you're my guardian, not my parent. As an adult, I feel like I'm entitled to make my own decisions."
"If she wants to go out with me, let her go," comes Stan's voice from the doorway. It's meek and she can barely hear it because her eyes are focused on Reed. There's only Reed and he's looking at her with fiery frustration and anger and those blue orbs are blue flames dancing with hers. "You don't control her."
At that moment, Reed slams the door without looking at Stan, locking it with one hand, never taking his eyes off of her. Stan starts pounding on the door but neither pays attention to it. Elise doesn't even feel guilty. She bites her bottom lip and Reed narrows his eyes at the gesture. For some reason, her stomach is doing flips and she knows, she knows, something is going to happen..
Isaac
Isaac doesn't know why he's nervous but he is. There are X-Reys in his stomach, flying faster than the speed of light over and under the organs that make up his body. Currently, he's sitting next to Raya on the bus. He doesn't have any time to change or put on deodorant so he hopes he doesn't smell too much like sweat and body odor. Perhaps he shouldn't have played that soccer game...
Inheriting Starlight Page 2