He’d never cared much for the style of the frame-and-stucco house, which looked like it belonged in California, in Sebastian’s estimation, with its white exterior and red-tiled roof. Butch had loved the look, loved the idea of standing out against the mountains, meadows and forest.
The passenger door opened and Matty slipped inside, closing the door gently. She plopped a small satchel on the floor. “I’ve been thinking of painting the house beige,” she said, as if reading his mind.
“When?”
“That’s just it.” She fastened her seat belt. “I have time in the winter but it’s too cold. In the summer I have no time.”
“I didn’t know you wanted to paint it.” He put the Bronco in gear and started down her lane. “We could round up some neighbors this summer and get it done.”
“Oh, Sebastian, I hate the idea of corralling everybody to help out the poor Widow Lang. I’ve always—”
“For God’s sake, Matty.” He found himself angrier than he should have been. Maybe he was ticked at himself for not noticing that she needed more help than he’d been giving. “It wouldn’t kill you to accept a gesture like that. People enjoy the sense of community they get from it. Damn, but you’re a proud woman. Too proud for your own good.”
She took the comment in silence, and instantly he felt sorry for blasting her like that. “Okay, if you have to do something in return, you could dance for us while we painted.” He glanced over at her to see if that made her smile.
It did. “I’d rather sing for y’all,” she said, a twinkle in her eye.
“I think we’d all be grateful if you’d dance, instead.”
“I could do both.”
“You could, but I doubt anybody would get any painting done, what with falling off the ladders laughing our asses off.”
Matty smiled and leaned her head back against the seat. “I would like to get the place painted. I’ve always hated the stark white. Sticks out like a sore thumb. I like the way your house blends into the landscape.”
“After you and Butch built your house, Barbara wanted me to paint ours white.”
Her head came up and she stared at him. “Yuck! Paint those beautiful logs white? What was she thinking?”
“That we blended in too much.”
Matty rolled her eyes. Then she grew thoughtful. “They were a lot alike, Butch and Barbara.”
“Guess so.” He kept his tone casual, but he was instantly on the alert to see if anything about her manner would indicate that she’d known about the affair.
She gave nothing away. “Must be true, that opposites attract,” she said.
“At least when you’re young. Somebody different from you seems more exciting.” At the moment he couldn’t think of anyone more exciting than Matty performing her little line dance in his kitchen. If there had been no baby, and no other considerations, he could easily have made love to her right there on the kitchen floor.
“We were young, all right,” Matty said. “All four of us, just starting out, determined to make a go of it.”
Sebastian smiled grimly. “Some of us more than others.”
“Yeah.” She gazed out at the cloud-covered mountains. “Once Butch bought that plane, he didn’t have much interest in ranch work. Remember how he claimed he’d use it to spot cattle, and even herd them with it?”
“Yep. And he never got around to it.”
“Too busy making little trips here and there to ever try using it for cattle control.”
Sebastian had learned from Barbara that Butch’s trips had been coordinated with her shopping jaunts to the big city. He and Matty must have been blind as bats not to put it all together. Then again, maybe she had, which would explain the torn picture.
“What do you plan to tell people?” Matty asked.
“About what?” For one wild moment he thought she was talking about Butch and Barbara.
“Elizabeth. We’ll have her with us, and we’ll be buying baby furniture. We’ll cause a stir. What do you want to say?”
He’d never considered the problem. But no question, it was a problem. They needed the baby furniture. After the wrestling match he’d had with Elizabeth while changing her diaper this morning he agreed with Matty that they needed a changing table he could strap the kid to, at the very least. A crib would be nice, too. He’d found a sliver in the drawer, and he didn’t want to take any chances Elizabeth would hurt herself.
But he couldn’t pop into town with a baby without starting seventeen kinds of gossip. That is, if Charlotte hadn’t started it already. He’d better figure out which direction he wanted to channel that gossip.
“You’re a lousy liar, by the way,” Matty added helpfully.
“Then I guess I don’t have much choice of what to say, do I? The truth is all I can manage.”
“Well, you don’t have to tell the whole truth, and if Jessica is in some sort of trouble, you don’t want to make things worse for her.”
Sebastian chuckled. “Let me take a guess. You’ve worked this all out, haven’t you?”
“Somebody had to, and it’s obvious it wasn’t going to be you.”
He got such a kick out of her. She could cram more thinking into ten minutes than he could accomplish in ten hours. “You might as well tell me what to say and get it over with, Matty.”
“Okay, here’s how you phrase it. I’m taking care of this baby for a friend who needs a little space right now. Matty’s helping me. And then you shut up. Don’t add anything, or you’ll get yourself in trouble.”
“Do you think they’ll wonder if the baby’s mine?”
“Of course. Don’t confirm or deny, as they say in politics. You can’t stop them from speculating. After all, that’s one of the main activities in Huerfano.”
“Maybe they’ll look at her and see a resemblance.”
“Do you see a resemblance?”
“I don’t know. Sometimes I think I do. Her nose, maybe.”
“Her nose?”
“Yeah.” Sebastian couldn’t decide if he wanted to find family traits in Elizabeth or not. On the one hand he didn’t want to think he’d been irresponsible, and despite what he’d said about making himself love Jessica, he didn’t think that was the best way to approach marriage. On the other hand he’d always wanted a kid. So he kept looking, to see if he now had one. “Her nose looks like a Daniels’ nose.”
“Then you must be thinking of a stray branch in your family tree, because her nose is nothing like yours. You have a strong nose, sort of like the profile of those Roman emperors. Elizabeth’s nose tips up. It’s cute, not strong.”
“She’s little. It could get stronger.”
“But that tilt at the end’s not going to go away. If you’re basing this on her nose, I think you’re off base.”
“Well, her eyes, then.”
“They look as much like mine as yours.”
He blew out an impatient breath. “Doggone Jessica for not telling me, one way or the other. Especially considering…” He paused, not sure how to get into the subject of him and Matty.
“Considering you’re starting to date again?” Matty suggested gently.
Funny how ever since he’d kissed Matty, the idea of dating had lost all appeal. He decided he couldn’t lead up to this. He’d have to jump in headfirst. “I really liked kissing you, Matty.” He kept his gaze fixed on the road.
“I liked kissing you, too, Sebastian.”
“And even if you kissed me, I was the one who started it, and I accept the responsibility for it.”
Matty sighed. “Sebastian, I think you’d accept the responsibility for the sun coming up every morning if somebody hinted that you should. But we’re going to share the responsibility for that kiss. I knew it was probably a big mistake. Nobody held a gun to my head.”
“What if it wasn’t a mistake?” Sebastian asked softly, and risked glancing over at her. “If Elizabeth didn’t figure in, that is.”
Her cheeks grew pink. “It was. Even i
f Elizabeth didn’t exist.”
“But—”
She held up her hand. “I’ve worked it out.”
“I’ll just bet you have,” he muttered.
“After Barbara left, you shut down for a while, which makes perfect sense. But now you’ve decided to become involved with women, again. And all those needs you’ve been suppressing are bubbling to the surface. Suddenly good old Matty, who never appealed to you sexually before, seems like the best thing since sliced bread. Once you got that out of your system, I’d go back to being good old Matty—a nice person, but not someone who turns you on.”
“You think that’s the kind of fickle person I am?”
“Not naturally, but you’ve been through some rough times, and I think your radar’s off.”
“Or it’s finally starting to work right.” He wouldn’t hurt Matty for the world, but he didn’t think she had this as nailed down as she thought. “And what about you? You could be attracted to me for the same reasons, and don’t tell me you’re not attracted, because I know different.”
“Of course I’m attracted,” she said softly.
Just like that, he was aroused. He wanted to pull the Bronco off to the side of the road and reach for her. But there was a baby in the back seat. “We might have something, here, Matty. No matter what you say, we just might. And what kills me is that we can’t do anything about it, because first I have to find out what Jessica has to say.”
She turned toward him, her shoulder pulling against the seat belt. “And that’s where you and I disagree. I think it would be a mistake for us to get involved, but not because of the baby.” Her blue gaze sharpened. “You deserve to marry for love, Sebastian, not convenience, or some overblown sense of loyalty. If you’re Elizabeth’s father, you can still be a devoted parent without the sacrifice of shackling yourself to a woman you don’t love.”
A band of tension made his hat feel a size too tight. “That baby didn’t ask to be born. Her welfare is my top priority.”
“That may be a good thing, because it’ll keep you from doing something foolish with your neighbor.”
He thought about spending at least another night with Matty and groaned. “Maybe I should hire that nurse you talked about.”
“If you want.”
“I don’t. I want you to help me, Matty. I’ll just have to keep my mind off of…what I’ve been thinking about.”
She lifted the satchel she’d brought. “I picked up my bathrobe.”
“That’ll help.”
“Let me know if there’s anything else.”
He glanced at her, taking in her pink, kissable lips, her soft blue eyes, her golden hair. She’d have a hell of a time taking care of Elizabeth with a bag over her head. “Don’t dance,” he said.
9
WHEN MATTY USED HER HEAD, she believed everything she’d told Sebastian. But her heart wanted to argue. Her heart dreamed about a fairy-tale ending in which Sebastian had finally discovered that Matty was the woman for him. If he’d admitted to ever having yearned for her in the past ten years, she might be more willing to listen to her heart.
But no. He claimed to have had his first arousing thought about her the night before. That was a little too coincidental for Matty’s tastes.
She was relieved when they pulled up in front of Huerfano’s only department store. Being confined in the Bronco with Sebastian, who seemed about to swear that he suddenly lusted after her body, was plain uncomfortable.
She glanced over a couple of spaces and recognized Gwen Hawthorne’s violet truck parked in front of the store. “Gwen’s here,” she said with pleasure. “I’ll bet she’s picking up yarn for a new project.” Gwen owned a bed-and-breakfast outside of town, and she and Matty shared a passion for weaving that had evolved into a close friendship.
“I don’t know if that’s so good, her being here.” Sebastian turned off the engine. “I was hoping we could try out our story on somebody we don’t know as well. Gwen’s not going to be satisfied with that bare-bones version you want me to hand out.”
“She will if we ask her to be, for now. Elizabeth won’t be a mystery baby forever, and once we know the truth, Gwen can be the first one we tell.”
“If you say so.” He opened the door, and cold air whipped in the cab. He closed the door again and glanced at her. “Want to handle it with Gwen?”
She could see he’d bungle the explanation, which would make life more difficult for them if people started calling the ranch or worse, driving out to catch a glimpse of Elizabeth. “Okay, I’ll do the talking.”
He let out a breath. “Thanks. I wasn’t—”
“But I think you should carry Elizabeth.”
“Oh.” He got that scared-little-boy look that made her want to hug him.
“You’ll be fine,” she said. “You’ve been carrying her in the house.”
“Yeah, but now we’ll be in a store. Stuff is closer together. I could turn wrong and bang her head against a shelf, or stumble over something and both of us could go down, and if I landed on top of her, I’d crush her like a pop can.”
The image made Matty wince, but Sebastian needed to get used to hauling Elizabeth around. Matty wasn’t willing to hang around the Rocking D until Jessica showed up. “Take it slow, and you’ll be fine.”
“She’s still asleep. How about if I stay here and you go in? Just pick out what you want, and then come back out and I’ll go in and pay for it, and load it in the back.”
“I’m not buying this furniture without you. And besides—” She turned as Elizabeth started fussing from the back seat. “Besides, she’s awake. Come on. Let’s get this accomplished so we can get home. I want to read that section in the book on baths. We should probably give her one.”
“Oh, Lord. A bath.”
“And she’ll be hungry soon.”
Sebastian stared at her. “I just thought of something. Should we have brought stuff like a bottle and diapers?”
Matty stared back at him, and slowly she remembered how her sister used to go out laden down with everything but the kitchen sink, even for a short trip. “I never thought.”
“Let’s get this show on the road.” Sebastian looked like a man approaching the hangman’s noose, but he got out of the Bronco and headed for the back seat and Elizabeth.
Matty helped him extricate the little girl from her seat and shield her from the bitter wind as they hurried into Coogan’s Department Store, a place that would have been called Coogan’s General Store a hundred years ago. The lady behind the counter looked as if she might have seen those days personally.
Straight gray hair in a bowl-cut framed a face creased with decades of smiling. When Matty and Sebastian came through the door, Nellie Coogan revved up that smile, the warm welcome in her brown eyes magnified by thick glasses.
Matty knew the exact moment when Nellie figured out that the bundle in Sebastian’s arms was a baby. The smile faltered. With a gasp and a widening of her eyes, Nellie clutched the edge of the cash register in front of her.
“Hello, Mrs. Coogan,” Matty called out, mindful of Nellie’s hearing loss. “I’ll bet you’re surprised to see us show up with a baby.”
Nellie’s lips moved, but when no sound came out, she simply nodded.
“Sebastian’s baby-sitting for a friend who needs some space,” Matty said. “I’ve agreed to help him. Right, Sebastian?”
“Yep.” Sebastian jiggled Elizabeth, who was kicking up a fuss under the blanket that he kept wrapped around her.
“You might want to unwrap her a little,” Matty said out of the corner of her mouth. “Before she suffocates.” Sometimes Nellie’s hearing loss came in handy.
Sebastian drew in a sharp breath and whipped the blanket off the baby like a sculptor unveiling a statue.
Elizabeth blinked and stopped crying.
“We need to look at your baby furniture,” Matty said.
Obviously still speechless, Nellie nodded again.
“Baby furn
iture?” asked a tall brunette who walked up to the counter with a rainbow of yarn in her arms. She dumped the skeins on the counter and turned toward Matty and Sebastian. “Baby? Where did you two come up with a kid?”
“This is Elizabeth, Gwen,” Matty said. “Sebastian’s agreed to baby-sit for someone who needed some space. I’m helping him.”
Gwen looked almost as dumbfounded as Nellie. “Since when does a baby-sitter have to invest in furniture?”
“This could be…for some time,” Matty said. Obviously she couldn’t keep the explanation as brief as she’d hoped.
Gwen raised her eyebrows. “Someone left her baby with you, Sebastian?”
“Yep.”
“Have you ever taken care of a baby before?”
“Not exactly.”
“That’s why I’m helping him,” Matty said. She tried not to laugh as she watched Gwen’s expression. The wheels were turning a mile a minute in that fertile brain of Gwen’s.
“You don’t know much more about babies than Sebastian does,” Gwen said.
“She came with instructions,” Sebastian said.
“Did she, now?” Openly curious, Gwen approached Elizabeth. “Hello, there, sweetheart.” She stuck her finger near Elizabeth’s hand and the baby grabbed hold. “Pleased to meet you, too.”
Sebastian craned his neck to get a view of what Gwen was up to with the baby peering over his shoulder. “Are your hands clean, Gwen?”
“Why, I think they’re clean enough,” Gwen said, her cheeks dimpling. “But if you think I should put on a surgical mask, I’ll see if Nellie has one for sale. I don’t have any contagious disease that I know of, though.”
Matty had been thinking the same thing when Gwen made contact with Elizabeth, but Sebastian had beat her to the punch. Suddenly she wondered about all the germs they were exposing this baby to by bringing her to town. “We’re new at this, and maybe a little overprotective,” she said.
“That’s better than being careless, or abandoning her altogether,” Gwen said pointedly. “She’s very young to be away from her mother. Was she being breast-fed?”
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