‘I can’t.’ Ellie’s eyes were bleak.
‘Why?’ demanded Leanne. ‘You own both stations.’
Ellie shook her head. ‘We own Warratah, but Jarrah was put in trust for Claire before she was born,’ she whispered.
Claire stared at her mother as she tried to come to terms with what she’d heard. ‘I don’t want Jarrah,’ she said firmly into the shocked silence. ‘I never wanted Jarrah. Have it, Leanne. Take it, do with it what you will, but please don’t let’s fight any more.’
Leanne looked from her sister to Angel then on to her mother. ‘See how easily she can give it up?’ she spat. ‘She doesn’t deserve Jarrah. If she did she’d fight for it.’
Ellie slumped on to the arm of the chair. ‘It isn’t as simple as that,’ she said, her voice cracking with emotion.
Leanne slammed her fist on the table. ‘Of course it is,’ she exploded. ‘Look at the plans I’ve made for Jarrah, then tell me I wasn’t meant to be here.’
Claire and Ellie moved towards the table like sleepwalkers. ‘What’s all this?’ Ellie turned the pages as Claire and Angel looked over her shoulder.
‘Those are plans for building guest cottages,’ Leanne said coldly. ‘Jarrah will remain a working station, but will also be open for visitors. I am. Was... planning to turn it into what the Americans call a dude ranch.’
‘It’s a brilliant idea,’ breathed Claire. ‘With the track leading out to the highway, Jarrah’s perfectly placed. Good on you, Leanne.’
Leanne eyed her with a coldness that silenced her. ‘Don’t patronise me, you cow. You aren’t the only one with brains in this family,’ she said flatly.
Claire flinched at the barb and saw the momentary flash of satisfaction in her sister’s eyes. She realised then that there were no rules in this battle, and Leanne wanted to inflict hurt – wanted them all to see how determined she was – and would go about it ruthlessly.
Leanne smoothed out the plans. ‘Homestead stays are popular with city people. They want to live the romance and adventure of the outback – but they like to do it in comfort. These cottages will be fitted out with the latest luxuries, and the swimming pool and recreation room will offer entertainment if the weather lets us down.’
She looked up from the lovingly drawn plans, the tears glinting but unshed. ‘People will come from the cities and play drover. They’ll be able to ride the plains and help with the round-up. Or go with Jacky Jack’s grandson into the Never-Never and learn about Dreamtime. They can have billy tea and damper around the camp-fire and listen to the Aboriginal legends, then sleep under the stars. We can run trips up to the north coast, and jeep safaris into the Territory. There’s fishing in the rivers and lakes, boating too. Then there’s bush-walks and nature trails. They can get a glimpse of what life’s like out here, and once I get it up and running, I’m positive the idea will grow.’ She glared defiantly at her silent, stunned husband then back to her mother and sister as she paused for breath. ‘The funding’s already arranged. A travel company in Brisbane has said they’d be interested.’
Claire stared at the plans as her sister talked. It was a wonderful idea, something she would never have thought of, but this shocking news of Jarrah’s ownership was tearing them apart. She looked at her mother. Ellie was very pale, her eyes sunken and deeply shadowed in her little face. ‘I don’t want Jarrah,’ she said again. ‘Please, Mum. Give it to Leanne.’
Ellie drew away from the table, her arms tightly folded around her waist. ‘I’ve already said I can’t do that,’ she said in a shaky voice. ‘Jarrah was left to you in trust – and then in turn to your children.’
Claire recoiled in horror. ‘What on earth made you and Dad come up with that crazy idea?’ Claire realised she was shouting and had to battle to contain her temper. ‘You’ve not only made Leanne hate me even more than she already did, but you’ve chained me and my unborn children to this place. How did you know if any of us wanted it? Why let Leanne think it would be hers when you knew all along it never could be?’
Ellie sank on to the sofa and put her face in her hands. ‘I agreed Leanne could run Jarrah, but never promised to give it to her. I thought she understood that once she’d learned the ropes we would help set her up in a place of her own,’ she sobbed. ‘How was I to know she was planning all this? She never said.’
‘Seems this family is lacking in communication skills as well as common sense,’ said Claire with a sigh. ‘Can’t you change this silly trust? Jarrah’s not worth all this trouble.’
Leanne’s intake of breath was sharp, but she was stilled by her mother’s voice. ‘It has nothing to do with me. Your Dad and I didn’t know what he’d done until you were three years old. By then it was out of our hands. We can do nothing to change it.’
Claire experienced a chill of premonition and had to sit down. Surely the rumours hadn’t been true? Surely her mother hadn’t lied to her the other day? ‘He?’ she breathed. ‘Who’s he?’
The silence in the room was electric.
‘I see I’ve arrived just in time,’ bellowed Aurelia from the doorway. ‘Drinks all round, Angel. Looks as if you could all do with one.’
Ellie gazed up at her in disbelief. ‘What? How did you?’ she stammered.
‘Couldn’t sleep, so I rang the head-stockman and asked him to fly me over. I had a feeling things weren’t right.’ She bent down and kissed Ellie’s cheek, then collapsed on the couch beside her.
Ellie took her hand. ‘Thanks,’ she said with simple sincerity. ‘I’ve made a mess of things as usual, and I don’t know how…’ Her voice tailed off.
Claire and Leanne moved around one another in stony silence as they handed out the drinks. Angel tried to persuade Leanne to calm down and was ignored, and Ellie was obviously struggling to remain coherent and strong. Claire returned to her place by the window, unable to sit still. The thought that Ellie could see condemnation in her eyes was hard to bear. Yet they were all trapped – and there was no escape.
*
Ellie looked at her daughters. She silently begged them for forgiveness and understanding, but knew she had no right. She’d lied for too many years – lied by omission. For she hadn’t had the guts to tell the truth and had refused to let her husband take the burden from her and tell the girls. Now she was faced with her worst nightmare. ‘I said earlier that this isn’t a simple story,’ she began. ‘And for you to understand how Jarrah came to be entrusted to Claire and any children she might have, I’m going to have to take you back again to the war years.’
Aware her daughters were looking at her with suspicion and not a little coldness, she almost lost her nerve. For how could she tell them the truth – the unvarnished, naked truth that could ultimately destroy both of them? She ran her tongue over dry lips as Aurelia gripped her fingers in encouragement. It was a dilemma she’d hoped she’d never have to face once the principal players were dead and buried – but it was not to be. For Mickey Maughan had seen to that. ‘You’ll remember I told you, Claire, that Mickey had made provisions for Jarrah should he not return from the war?’
Claire nodded, the fair hair drifting around her face as she remained against the back-cloth of the night beyond the window. ‘He put the deeds in Alicia’s name, trusting she would give them back if he or Seamus returned. If they didn’t, Jarrah was to be yours.’ Her gaze was bewildered. ‘But you said you didn’t own it. How could that be?’
Ellie realised Claire had missed the point. ‘Mickey came back,’ she said softly. ‘The deeds were returned to him and remained with him until he died.’
‘But Mickey died six months before I was born. I’ve seen his gravestone.’ Claire moved away from the window and sat down. The darkness returned to her eyes as she looked into Ellie’s face. ‘You said I was three years old when you found out about this inheritance. Has it got something to do with the other man buried in that graveyard?’ It was a whisper – yet there was a tensile quality in those few words that demanded the truth.
The silence in the room was ominous as Ellie met her stare and returned it. ‘Yes.’ It was as if a great burden had been lifted from her shoulders.
Claire swayed and had to sit down. ‘You’d better explain, and no more stories. Just the plain, hard facts.’
Ellie wet her lips and reached for a cigarette. Leanne’s shock was clear in her face, but at least she’d remained silent, and for that she was grateful. Angel obviously was having a calming effect as they sat entwined on the same chair. She looked back at Claire, her heart heavy. ‘What I have to say is going to hurt you, Claire,’ she said softly. ‘Yet I want you to know that your father and I love you, and that whatever happens after tonight, we will still love you.’
The silence was profound, but the welcome pressure of Aurelia’s hand spurred her on. ‘Weddings have a strange effect on people,’ she began. ‘I was missing Joe terribly, and I knew Alicia wouldn’t be staying on once Aurelia was back from her honeymoon. I was surprised how much that saddened me. We’d forged a good friendship over the war years, and I would miss her.’
Ellie chose her words carefully as she carried on speaking. But the scenes gradually unfolding in her mind brought her so much pain she stumbled over her words. ‘I suppose I was slightly tipsy and a little maudlin that day, and when Charlie suggested we leave the reception and find some peace by the lagoon, I was happy to go with him.’
She paused as the memories returned, the snapshot moments of that day so clear it was as if it had all happened a few hours ago. Charlie was a little unsteady on his feet from too much beer, and when she told him she’d been mourning Joe, she’d thought she’d seen a flicker of something dark in his eyes. Yet it had been so fleeting she hadn’t had time to analyse it, and when he’d put his arm around her waist and held her, she’d known she’d been mistaken. Charlie was mourning his loss just as much as she was, and it was a comfort to them both that they had each other.
‘Charlie went back into the hotel and fetched a bottle of champagne, then I drove us out to Five Mile lagoon. We didn’t talk much, but then we didn’t need to. We’d become very close over the past few years and I was grateful for his friendship and support.’
Ellie remembered how she’d parked up and reached into the back of the utility for a blanket before they headed for a grassy spot well away from the water. This was freshwater croc country and it was wiser to remain in the open than further down near the water where the prehistoric reptiles lurked. ‘We shared the champagne and talked about the future, just as close friends do, there was nothing else between us.’
Claire rammed her hands in her pockets, turned her back on Ellie and stared into the fire. Her tone was sharp, the colour bleached from her face. ‘What’s this leading to? She demanded.
Ellie stared at her, unable to reply. She’d said too much. Had given away the one thing that might have kept some semblance of dignity to the story.
*
Aurelia could tell Ellie was at her wit’s end. Leanne was obviously confused and angry, and Claire was suspicious. She hadn’t been a bit surprised when Ellie had fallen into silence – she couldn’t blame her for wanting to avoid the truth. Yet things had progressed to a point where it had to be told – and because of Ellie’s slip, she knew the consequences would be stark.
‘I got back from my six week honeymoon to find Alicia very restless. She’d had enough of cows and horses – enough of the heat, the dust and the flies. She needed to go home to England.’ Aurelia eyed the two girls, and despite their glares refused to be intimidated. She would tell this story her way – otherwise she’d get muddled and make a pig’s ear of the whole thing.
‘Poor Alicia. Fate seemed determined to keep her here and although she did her best to hide it, I knew immediately something was wrong.’
*
‘What’s the matter with the girl?’ she demanded. Ellie had silently drifted into the kitchen, picked at her breakfast and drifted out again without a word to anyone.
‘I have no idea,’ Alicia replied. ‘I’ve tried talking to her. Tried talking to Charlie, but I can’t get any sense out of either of them.’ She lit a cigarette – the third that morning Aurelia noticed, and it was still only seven o’clock. ‘There’s something going on between them, but they refuse to talk to me.’
Aurelia’s scrutiny was sharp. ‘What do you suspect?’ she demanded.
Alicia looked away. ‘Ellie came home from your wedding on her own and locked herself in her room. She wouldn’t speak to me or Wang Lee for days. Then she emerged as if nothing had happened and refused to enlighten us.’
‘And Charlie?’ The tone of Aurelia’s voice was ominous. There was something in Alicia’s manner that made her uneasy.
‘He came back a few days later, and I came across them having a heated exchange behind the barn. They stopped when they saw me and I still don’t know what it was about. Charlie then went on muster for three weeks. He was home for about a week after that, then Mickey rang and asked him to go out to Jarrah I have no idea why, and Mickey was keeping tight lipped about it. Ellie was clearly impatient to see Charlie again, and when he got back from Jarrah they rode off and were gone for nearly two days.’
‘It’s time I had a word with her,’ Aurelia said firmly. ‘But first, I’m going to talk to Charlie.’
Alicia’s hand stilled her. ‘Don’t do anything rash, Aurelia,’ she counselled.
Aurelia reached for her hat. ‘Jack’s not here, so it’s up to me to sort things out. Just like a man,’ she snorted. ‘Never around when they’re needed. But I will not have secrets in this house, and I’m determined to get to the bottom of this.’
Charlie was sorting out shoes for the horses, the forge lit only by the hot red glow of the fire as he hammered them into shape. His shirt was off revealing the cruel scar down his side, his broad chest slicked with sweat as he worked in the heat.
‘Put that down,’ Aurelia ordered. ‘I want to talk to you.’
He eyed her from beneath his brows, dropped the hammer on the brick fire surround and stepped away from the flames. After smearing the sweat from his forehead he pulled off the leather gloves and tucked them into the pocket of his moleskins. ‘What do you want?’ he asked with a touch of belligerence.
Aurelia ignored his lack of manners. They had been scratchy with one another ever since he’d hit the priest. She eyed him thoughtfully. Something was different about him, just as it was with Ellie. It was as if the two of them were on edge – waiting for something to happen. She took a deep breath. ‘I want to know why Ellie’s behaving so strangely.’
‘Why ask me?’ he muttered. He picked up the wooden ladle and took a long drink from the bucket of water before wiping his mouth with the back of his hand.
Aurelia took two paces towards him, eyed the hammer and thought better of it. Charlie was tense, she could see it in his eyes and in the set of his shoulders. He was suddenly much more than a man with a secret – he was a man cornered. ‘Because you seem to be the cause,’ she said with her usual bluntness.
His insolent gaze flickered over her. ‘As I said before. Talk to Ellie.’
Aurelia was fast losing what little patience she had. ‘I’m asking you,’ she snapped.
He eyed her from beneath the lock of hair that had drifted over his brow. ‘Not my place to tell you,’ he said with a secretive smile.
‘Then I will ask Ellie,’ she snapped. ‘I’m determined to get to the bottom of this.’
‘Ask me what?’ said the voice from the doorway.
Aurelia whipped round as Ellie emerged from the sunlight into the dimness of the forge, her slight figure haloed by the sun’s glare at her back. Her gaze softened, the concern for her niece rising in a great tide of affection. ‘I was asking Charlie why there has been an atmosphere in the homestead,’ she said quietly. ‘Your mother and I are concerned.’
‘I’ve had a lot on my mind,’ replied Ellie. ‘I’m sorry if I’ve troubled you.’
‘Perhaps we should go back t
o the homestead and talk in private?’ Aurelia said with a glance towards the silent, watchful Charlie.
Ellie shook her head and went to stand beside him. ‘There’s nothing that can’t be said right here,’ she said firmly. ‘Charlie and I are getting married.’
The declaration took Aurelia’s breath away. ‘Don’t be ridiculous,’ she gasped.
‘I’m old enough to make up my own mind,’ said Ellie quietly. ‘And as I’m over twenty one, I don’t need your permission.’
‘But you don’t love him,’ declared Aurelia, hoping desperately she was right. ‘How on earth could you come to this decision so quickly – and so secretively?’
‘Charlie and I are getting married next week. It’s all arranged.’ Her stare was one of defiance as she waited Aurelia’s response.
‘Next week?’ Aurelia bellowed. Then she saw the glint of victory in Charlie’s eyes, the possessive hand on Ellie’s shoulder. There was something very wrong here. Aurelia shivered as the only possible reason dawned. ‘Why?’ she asked baldly.
Ellie dug her hands in her pockets. She dropped her defiant stare and fixed it on her boots. When she spoke, her voice was just above a whisper. ‘Because I’m pregnant.’
16
The gasp was like a cold wind sifting through dead leaves. Claire was frozen where she stood. She couldn’t look at her mother, couldn’t bear to see confirmation in her eyes. For this was the darkest moment she’d known.
‘You must put the time and place in context,’ Ellie pleaded. ‘We didn’t have the pill in those days, and an illegitimate baby was stained for life. There would have been no proper birth certificate, no rights to an inheritance, no proper registration for work or enlistment into the forces. We had to marry.’
‘But you didn’t love him,’ Claire muttered. ‘You said so. So why did you do it with him?’ She finally dredged up the courage to face her mother, and what she saw was shocking. For Ellie had seem to shrivel and grow old in the past few minutes and her stare was that of a frightened rabbit caught in headlights.
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