“She’s hanging in there,” Seth explained and did his best to tramp down the sudden anger that rose at hearing his old friend’s voice. He should have been here with his sister, not some guy she’d met a long time ago. Jacob deserved to be with family and Lucy deserved familiar people to lean on. He’d seen her discomfort at needing help to the restroom. He hadn’t minded offering that help, but he could only imagine how she felt in being forced to take it.
“Ah, I hear it in your voice,” Chris observed. “You’re pissed. Look man, I’m sorry. Neither Amber nor I could get away. Believe me, I wouldn’t have suggested Lucy call you if it weren’t absolutely necessary.”
“Why doesn’t she have any female friends?” Seth demanded and had to remind himself to keep his voice down lest he wake Jacob up. “Why is she in this godforsaken town, with a son for fuck’s sake, all alone?”
“She wanted to raise her son alone,” Chris snapped. “She was afraid someone would figure out who his biological father is. She just wanted Jacob to have a normal life.”
“That doesn’t make sense,” Seth argued. “Any man worth his salt would be lucky to have a kid like Jacob. The boy is smart, funny and talented as hell,” he stressed. “Tell me who this asshole is and I’ll have a talk with him.”
“It’s not that easy,” Chris said defensively.
“The hell it ain’t,” Seth argued more forcefully. “A man has the right to know if he has a kid, no matter who he is.” He frowned when he realized he’d sudden switched gears. First he was ready to rip the asshat apart and now he was defending this total stranger?
“Yeah, well, you should talk to Lucy, I’m not going to chance my sister’s wrath,” Chris explained. “Besides, it’s her choice. Nobody forces her to do anything she doesn’t want to do.”
“True enough,” Seth relented and decided to let the subject drop for the time being. He and Chris fell into the friendly banter that only best friends would understand. After about an hour they said their goodbyes with Chris promising to check back soon.
Seth ended the call and felt a ball of disgust form in his stomach. Lucy – beautiful, kind, sweet and smart Lucy – was battling a disease that ravaged her body by the hour and she cared more for her son than herself.
It wasn’t the fact that she hadn’t told Jacob’s father about his son, it was the fact that she’d protected her son from a man who possibly didn’t want him.
“Uncle Seth?” a small voice called and Seth whirled to see the sleepy-eyed, hair-tousled little boy in question standing in the doorway to his room.
“Hey little man,” Seth cooed and glanced at his watch. Seeing that it was only five a.m., he knew it was still too early for the kid to be up. Something must have woken him. “What you doing up this early?” he asked and moved toward him to scoop the boy in his arms. “You should still be asleep.”
“I had a nightmare,” Jacob murmured and buried his face in the crook of Seth’s throat. An unfamiliar feeling coursed through Seth’s body. He’d never had anyone depend on him for anything. Sure, he fulfilled his contractual obligations to the Cardinals’ every year, but beyond that, his life was all about himself and no responsibilities.
Now, after all these years, he realized that it felt good to be needed for just who he was; not his talent on the diamond, not his experience with the ladies. Lucy and her son needed the man, the flesh and blood man Seth was and that meant the world to him.
Seth wrapped his arms a bit tighter around Jacob and headed back into the boy’s bedroom. Placing him gently on the bed, he stretched out beside him. Jacob’s little fingers clenched the front of Seth’s t-shirt and this caused him to smile.
It felt great to be needed. It was a feeling he could definitely get used to.
“How about I stay with you while you take a nap?” Seth murmured and turned onto his side, extracting Jacob’s fingers from his shirt and laying his arm across the boy’s stomach.
“You won’t leave me?” Jacob asked, his voice small and hesitant.
“Never,” Seth answered with a conviction he didn’t know resided within him.
Seth decided that – Jacob willing – he’d drop the boy off at daycare later this morning and go visit Lucy alone. He wanted to talk to her about Jacob’s father and his right to know he had a son. No, it wasn’t his business, but he was making it his. He’d grown really fond of the little boy and the thought of another man in his life made Seth jealous, but the kid deserved to know his biological father.
It wasn’t that he questioned Lucy’s parenting abilities, quite the opposite. The woman was phenomenal as a mother. Her entire life revolved around her little boy and that, itself, was admirable.
Chapter Nine
Lucy
Lucy shuffled into her room, her I.V. stand in tow and barely made it to the bed before her knees gave out. She’d walked the entire hallway of the fifth floor three times and it had taken sheer will to make it. Her body resisted with every step. The aches, pains and weakness told her that she didn’t have the strength, she wouldn’t make it, and that she should just go back to bed and rest.
But she’d ignored the nagging voice and kept going. She kept images of her baby in the foremost of her mind and it had served as fuel for her trek. Now that she was back in the confines of her room, she shoved the metal rack to the bedside and all but fell face first onto the uncomfortable bed.
“Need some help?” a familiar male voice inquired from the open door.
Lucy closed her eyes and groaned. Thank God she’d actually donned a matching pajama set. Had she been clad in the ordinary hospital gown, her skinny white butt would have been shining like the full moon.
She wiggled around until she lay on her back and her frail legs dangled from the bedside. She offered Seth a timid smile and nodded once.
“Help me get my legs on the bed?” she asked. “I think I overdid my daily physical therapy,” she finished and sighed heavily.
Seth – the tall, muscular, healthy athlete – strode forward and cupped her diminished calves in his wide, capable hands. Gently he raised her legs and placed them on the bed and observed as she wiggled around and got as comfortable as possible.
“Where’s Jacob?” she asked once she noticed her baby’s absence.
“I dropped him off at daycare,” Seth explained. “I think he needed some playtime with kids his own age, he was starting to act like me,” he quipped and she inhaled sharply. “You know, scratching his ass and burping involuntarily,” Seth finished with a chuckle.
Lucy relaxed and for the hundredth time questioned her decision to keep such important news to herself. Jacob had never seemed to want a father figure, but now that Seth had come around it was like the man filled a gap neither she nor her son knew was missing.
Chris had nagged her, ever since she’d found out she was pregnant, to tell Seth the truth. Her brother was dead sure his friend would do the right thing. But fear kept her lips firmly shut and only the threat of never speaking to him again kept Chris from doing it himself.
Slightly nervous with it being just the two of them, Lucy reached down and tugged at the hem of her shirt, pulling it lower over her stomach. Barely twenty-six years old, she should’ve had a rocking body. But being pregnant and now having cancer had done terrible things to her.
“Why haven’t you told Jacob’s father about him?” Seth blurted and Lucy jerked so hard she nearly fell off the other side of the bed. “Both he and the boy deserve to know.”
“That’s personal,” Lucy answered and continued fidgeting with her clothes. Had Chris said something to Seth? Had he figured it out? She’d never been good at gauging other people. This conversation wasn’t one she was ready to have, so she turned to look up at Seth and smiled.
“If or when the time comes, I will,” she assured.
“When Jacob gets older and demands to know about his absent father?” Seth asked in a slightly raised voice. “Do you honestly think any man wouldn’t be proud to have such a wonderf
ul son? The boy is a gift.”
Seth turned and grabbed the visitor’s chair from the corner and dragged it to Lucy’s bedside. Flopping down into it, he reached up and ran thick fingers through inky black spikes.
Even disheveled, Lucy found him gorgeous. Most women did, she reminded herself. She couldn’t subject Jacob to a father who wasn’t ready to be a father. Seth’s professional career was too important to him to settle down.
“It’s none of your business,” Lucy murmured softly. “If you’re tired of watching him, I’ll find someone else.”
“You have no one else,” Seth snapped and raised narrowed eyes at her. “You’ve pushed everyone away from fear they would spill your dirty little secret,” he accused. “I’m not tired of watching him, I love spending time with him. I just can’t help thinking about all the time his father has missed and you don’t have the right to keep him from the man who would love him.”
Lucy’s eyes narrowed in response and she felt the fires of hell blazing within her blood. How dare this man – this stranger – lecture her? Where had he been these past four years? Oh, that’s right; he’d been partying with every slut he could find. He’d been neck deep up his own ass. Maybe if he’d had a plexi-glass belly button he would’ve known. What would he have done had she told him? Possibly sent a monthly check and called it good?
“Excuse the hell out of me,” Lucy barked. “I have trust issues and with good reason. The only man I’ve ever allowed myself to be vulnerable with left me high and dry mere hours after he’d gotten what he wanted.”
“Is that what all this is about?” Seth demanded and surged to his feet. “You’re punishing this child because you and I had a one-night stand over five years ago?”
“I’m not punishing him,” she argued vehemently. “I’m protecting him.”
“From, what?” Seth demanded in exasperation. “Just what exactly are you protecting him from? Having friends, loved ones he can count on in his times of need, of letting himself care for someone who isn’t his mother?”
“I’m protecting him from the same man who threw me away without a thought,” she fired back and immediately wished the words back. But what was said couldn’t be unsaid just like what was done couldn’t be undone.
There it was; no going back now. Blazing hot fear roared to life in her belly. What had she done? She’d been so careful all these years and now the secret she would’ve died to protect came rushing out, on a trail of red hot temper and the kicker was the fact that she’d told the one person she didn’t want to know.
Seth stopped pacing abruptly and just stood with his back to her. She cursed her temper but she mostly cursed her heart. She’d known, all those years ago, that she’d fallen in love with Seth and it was the kind of love that transcended time. The kind women read about in romance novels or watched on television. But being the shy, young and inexperienced girl that she was, she’d kept it to herself.
After all, how could such a hot guy with a bright future see anything in her? She was nothing more than a geeky librarian. He was the type of man to walk around with a supermodel on his arm.
“Oh my God,” he whispered, jarring Lucy from her rampant thoughts and regrets. “It’s all been right before me the entire time. Why didn’t I figure it out sooner?” His breath hitched and it sounded like someone had punched him in the stomach. Lucy frowned and for a brief moment thought perhaps he was crying.
“Probably because you didn’t want to,” another male voice announced from the still-open door.
Lucy’s eyes widened when she saw her brother standing there, hands hidden in a bouquet of yellow daises. She hadn’t been expecting him so soon and was more than glad to see him. Glad wasn’t exactly the right word; she was relieved. Now she wouldn’t have to deal with this fallout all on her own.
Chapter Ten
Seth
Seth tried but failed to calm his racing heart. Thinking back to the framed picture in Jacob’s room he recounted the date. All the pieces started clicking into place. It didn’t take much imagination to see himself in Jacob’s eyes.
He had a son.
He had a smart, gifted and fine-looking son.
Inhaling deeply, he turned to first face Chris.
“Why didn’t you tell me?” he asked hoarsely. He tried his best to keep from lashing out at his old friend. The man had plenty of time in which he could’ve told him. Hell, he could’ve told him last night.
Chris shrugged and moved into the room to place the vase of flowers on the table by Lucy’s bed. Seth noticed that they had little red sticks strategically placed throughout the flowers with little red hearts sitting atop the tips. It reminded him of how Valentine’s Day was nearing; in his haste to get to Lucy, he’d all but forgotten about Cupid, the ugly kid in a diaper carrying the bow and arrows of love.
Chris leaned down and kissed his sister on the forehead, offering her a smile before turning back to Seth.
“It wasn’t my place or my decision,” Chris explained simply. “But just so you know, I’ve been on her for years to tell you. I knew you’d do the right thing,” he clarified and closed the distance between them for a thorough man hug. “It’s good to see you.”
Seth thumped his buddy soundly on the back and turned his eyes back to the mother of his child. Malnourished, weak and body ravaged with an incurable illness, but still beautiful beyond measure. No matter how many women he’d had over the years, he’d never felt anything toward them; nothing that compared to the way he felt about Lucy. The revelation hit him like a lightning bolt.
Had he known they’d had a son, he would’ve dropped everything and ran to her. His big, cushy lifestyle be damned. He’d have given it all up in a New York minute and that thought alone shocked him to his core. When had he gotten so soft? When had he gone from partying all hours of the night to being a responsible adult? How the hell had it happened and when?
Regardless, his heart swelled in his chest and he knew. He’d lied to himself all his life. He did want a family, he did want children. He wanted it all and he wanted it with Lucy and Jacob.
But, in retrospect, had she told him back then, he probably would’ve insisted she had an abortion or put the baby up for adoption. He hadn’t been ready back then, but now he was and it was that knowledge alone that finally made him understand why she’d kept it from him. She’d been mature enough to do the right thing for both of them and even though it cost him and his son four years, it gave them a lifetime to make it up.
If she let him and ‘if’ was a big word. He hadn’t exactly proven to her that he was as changed as he realized he was. Sure, he’d dropped everything and flown into town the moment she called him. But he’d done it thinking they’d rekindle a little romance from years past. Yes, he’d taken care of Jacob for a couple days, but being a dad 24/7 was a different story. He knew he’d have to prove himself far more capable and somewhere deep down, a need to have her approval roared to life.
If it came down to it, he would beg her to have him, flaws and all. And he would refuse to take ‘no’ for an answer. Especially not after seeing the way she looked at him; more correctly, not after understanding the way she looked at him.
Not for the first time since he’d been back in Pennsylvania, he saw the admiration and the love in her eyes and recognized it for what it was. How long had she felt that way for him?
“You should’ve told me,” Seth declared and moved to her side. Since Chris had lowered himself into the visitor’s chair, Seth sat on the edge of Lucy’s bed. Her feeble body didn’t occupy much room, but she moved her legs over anyway to allow him plenty of space.
“Why didn’t you tell me?” he asked even though he knew the answer. He wanted to hear what she had to say.
“Are you kidding me?” Lucy snapped, her face flushing red. “Tell mister-big-league-baseball player; a new woman for every night of the week, that he had a son he repeatedly confirmed he didn’t want? How many times have you mentioned in an interview that a fa
mily and children wasn’t in your plans? You dare sit here and ask me why I didn’t tell you?” Her ragged breath rushed in and out and she reached up to place a hand over the center of her chest. He saw just how upset she was and it was that knowledge alone that convinced him to stop nagging her.
Although her words stung him like a stake through the heart, she was right. He was mad as hell at her, but he couldn’t blame her for her decision to keep Jacob safe from his father’s media-crazed life. Hell, even Seth feared what the paparazzi would print about him next. Could he really drag an innocent child into that kind of life?
“Are you going to take him away from me now that you know?” Lucy asked in a small voice.
Chris cursed, lunged to his feet and paced away from them to close the door.
“Of course he’s not,” Chris answered succinctly. “Tell her Seth; tell her you wouldn’t do that.”
Seth shook his head, tears forming in his eyes.
“No,” he admitted softly. “I’d never take that child away from his mother. I’d never take him away from you,” he murmured and reached down to take Lucy’s hand in his. “I’m here now and that’s all that counts.”
Chris reclaimed his seat and reached forward to pat Lucy gently on the arm.
“I’m here until the end of February and Amber will be in a few days before the fourteenth,” her brother informed her and Seth felt fear clench in his gut. Were they going to ask him to leave now that he wasn’t needed anymore?
“It’s my off season,” Seth interrupted, hoping to stave off any suggestions he pack up and head off. “I’d like to stay and get to know Jacob a little better.”
Lucy’s eyes went from Seth’s to her brother. She was silently asking him for his opinion and in the end; Chris must have conveyed something because she turned back to Seth and nodded curtly.
A Family By Valentine: A Secret Baby Second Chance Romance Page 4