"Not very far," she said flatly, but I could detect a hint of discomfort in her voice. This was more than enough for a 'vivid' person like me to understand.
"Then maybe I should walk," I said and was ready to open the door when Piper gripped my elbow.
"Wait, are you crazy?" she said. "You can't walk there by yourself. You don't even know the area."
"That's what Google Maps is for, isn't it?" I said. She didn’t know what to say. "Look, cousin, you don't have to put on a smiley face if you don't feel comfortable being around me. I'm not asking you to step on egg shells when it comes to anything concerning my situation or even my sexuality. So if you don't like it, you don't have to give me a cold shoulder like that. I'm not here to make things difficult for you."
Piper's blue eyes widened at me, speechless. I made an attempt to move again, but she stopped me one more time.
"Nina!"
"What is your problem, Piper?" I snapped. I wasn't in the best of mood the entire time I was here, and this was starting to get under my skin.
"I'm sorry," she said softly. "It's just—this is so new to me and I don't know how to react to something like this. I mean, your being—gay. Our family is pretty normal as you can see. This is kind of..."
"Unusual to have me?" I said. "I understand that. That's why I don't want to burden you with me around."
"But we're cousins," she said again. "I just need time to adjust to it. I'm sorry, Nina, please don't be mad."
I heaved out a sigh.
"That's alright," I said.
"And please, don't tell my mom I said this to you," Piper said and she put another hand on my arm pleadingly. "But is it okay if we just pretend we don't know each other at school?"
I thought I had enough experiences with discrimination, but nothing is ever okay when people say hurtful things to you, no matter how many times you have heard it. I was prepared to face such treatment ever since I came out, but it still kind of hurt.
Is it ever okay to be treated like that?
Nien, ora, non, nyet.
Anyway, it wasn't her fault that Piper was born straight just as I was born gay. She wouldn’t understand it.
"Fine," I said quietly at last. "If that's what you want."
Piper let out a sigh of relief. She patted my hand with a grateful smile and then started the car. The engine purred to life. Piper seemed to relax a little. I sat back and closed my eyes, trying to drown out every thought that tried to ignite my brain with self-pity.
After about ten minutes of our silent ride, Piper spoke up again.
"By the way, I love your clothes. Never seen this fashion here. It makes you look different," Piper said.
Maybe she just said that to cheer me up.
"Thanks," I said.
"Well," she breathed and gave a nervous laugh. "I'm surprised you don't wear that lesbian lingerie."
"What is lesbian lingerie?"
"Oh! Well, welcome to America," Piper said and grinned sideways at me. "I was referring to flannels. I've heard lesbians love flannels and beanies and sandals to death. It's like lingerie to them, isn't it, Nina?"
I looked at Piper in disbelief and for a moment, I was trying so hard not to strangle her with the seat-belt.
At last, we reached our school none too soon.
The campus was bigger than I expected. New shiny Jeeps, and Porsches were common in the student lot—obviously a school for rich kids. Piper cut the engine as soon as she found a space.
Piper had given me a map of the buildings and told me everything that I needed to know. It would have been nice of her if I hadn't figured out that just so I wouldn't have to bother her again.
"See you after school," she said and walked away quickly.
I saw a group of girls standing by the entrance's staircase. They waved at her to join them.
I sighed and stuffed everything in my bag then slung the leather strap over my shoulder. Inhaling the fresh morning air, I convinced myself that no one was going to accuse me of being a Russian spy or worse bully me for being gay.
Skirting around the main building, I found another double glass doors and slipped inside. When the bell rang with a nasal buzzing noise, I walked to the registrar office. There was a tall boy with clear skin and oil slick black hair in front of me at the counter. I walked up and talked to a young woman behind the computer screen. The woman told me to wait and left the desk for a moment, and while I waited for my papers to be signed, the guy turned to me.
"Hey, I haven't seen you around here before?" he said overly friendly. The guy towered over me with his tall muscular body. I wore a low cut t-shirt and had to hold my document papers over my chest. With a dry smile, I shook my head back.
The woman gave me the slips.
"Oh, you're new, I see," the guy said. "Well, I can show you to your class if you’d like. What's your first period?"
Because I was new and hated being late, I had to agree.
"Mmm, Advanced Language Arts, Room 102, Building C," I said as I read through my schedule.
"Cool, I'm going to the same building," he said. "I could show you the way."
"Thank you." I smiled and we began to walk.
"I'm Jack Connor by the way," he said and when I didn't say anything back, he added, "And you are—?"
"Oh," I breathed. "I'm Nina Volk—er—Nina Black."
It felt sort of weird saying my new name out loud for the first time, but I figured my former name would sound even weirder. I guessed I wanted to be a new person now, and Pytor's name just didn't feel like mine anymore.
From the corner of my eyes, I saw Jack nodded at a group of guys hovering around on the other side of the hall. They chuckled and hooted among their peers.
Everything looked like it was coming straight out of a typical American movie—a typical American high school with janitors and students roaming the halls, talking through the corridors by their glossy red lockers. It was different from my old school back in Russia. Students wore whatever they wanted here whereas I had to wear my uniform. The energy was also different. I couldn't tell whether the place was depressing or exciting.
I hoped I wasn't feeling too overwhelmed by all that.
"So where are you from?" Jack asked a while later.
"I've just moved here from Moscow," I replied. Jack's eyes widened in utter surprise.
"No kidding? That explained the accent!" he said and I smiled back, but half of me wanted to roll my eyes at him.
"You came here with your family then?"
"No, it's just me," I said.
"So you live with any relatives?"
"Yes, my aunt."
"Oh, I see. Well, I know lots of places to hang out in town. If you don't mind, we can—" he started to offer but I cut him off by pointing to a classroom door.
"Hey, that's my class!" I said and started to run off towards it. "Thank you, Joe!"
He looked confused.
"It's Jack—but okay—see you around!" he called after me.
My morning class passed by in the same vague fashion. Mrs. Smith introduced me to my classmates, and I blushed like crazy when everyone started to gasp after they found out where I came from. Pytor said I would love the school here. 'You're so smart,' he said. 'It would all come easily for you over there. It's going to be the best year of your life.' I hated it when he said that.
After the first period, I got to know a few people who took the same ALA class with me. They helped me find my way around the campus. Although they were welcoming and helpful, I tried to keep the conversation short without being rude.
I used to care about making friends. But now looking back, I realized that being popular in high school was like sitting at a cool table inside an asylum. I wanted to finish it as soon as possible and move out of Robert's house then go to college and get a life elsewhere. I had learned quite recently that no matter how much people love you, they aren't going to be there for you forever.
I had to depend on myself.
I sat alone near the window in science class when some students cried out as they gathered at the windows. I turned to see what the fuss it was about.
That was when I saw a very unusual sport car pulling up into the parking lot across from the building. It looked like it belonged to Batman or some sci-fi action movies. With all the sleek black tinted windows and black metal designs, I would be disappointed if the driver wasn't as impressive.
We could hear the growling engine before it was cut off. Then the car doors were lifted open. A tall silver hair dude stepped out. The bulky guy wore a black sleeveless shirt, showing his weird tattoos, which spiraled over both of his arms like little snakes. A moment later, we saw a long slim leg popped out from the other side. The trees and grassy hill almost hid the person away from my view.
More people came over to the window, all gawking at the spectacle.
At last, I saw a tall blonde girl appeared.
I had never seen anyone, who caught and held my attention like this one in my entire life. It was the first moment you realize you have formed an unhealthy obsession towards a stranger—or as my best friend Klara had put it— your ultimate crush.
The girl wore all black —black leather jacket, black t-shirt, black skinny jeans with a pair of heavy combat boots. And when she walked, it reminded me of a black panther. Her long messy blonde hair gently swayed to the wind. At the same moment, the sunlight broke through the clouds and bathed the blonde angel like a halo.
Several gasps issued from the people around me. I, myself, was bewitched, intrigued, and above all confused. Something about her was impossible to describe.
But then we saw another girl wearing a fitted jacket and zipper leggings walked up to them. She was about the same size as me with short jet-black hair. As she joined the duo, they exchanged a few words and then walked together towards the building. It was like watching some supermodels on a catwalk.
I was still mesmerized by their unusual beauties. Their facial features were so different — so strangely proportional and singular that I now understood why it caused such an unduly reaction, especially with the blonde one. She seemed more inhumanly perfect and even intimidating.
"I bet they must be some ancient gods coming down to Earth," a girl sighed dreamily beside me.
"Who are those kids?" I asked. I didn't realize I was actually dying of curiosity until then. The girl looked at me for a moment before she remembered I was new.
"That's Triton and Xenon Knight," she told me, pointing to the short-haired girl and the big guy.
"And the blonde one?"
The girl leaned in and said in a theatrical voice as if she’d been waiting for that question.
"Her name is Allecra Knight."
CHAPTER 3
I learned later on that the trio was siblings. They just got transferred to this school two months ago. Their unusual appearances and intimidating personality scared people off, but they never caused any trouble so the teachers just left them alone. Maybe they scared the teachers, too.
Anyway, it was counterproductive for me to suddenly take an interest in those strangers. I shook my head to clear the image of the blonde girl and opened my science textbook to read before the class started. The book was full of colorful pictures of galaxies, planets, and other scientific information.
I was so absorbed in my reading that I didn't know when the noises in the class had died down. It wasn't until a moment later that I heard the sound of heavy boots approaching my table. I felt a presence of someone standing beside me so I looked up.
My heart almost exploded out of my chest. I recognized that perfectly chiseled face immediately.
Oh, my god.
Allecra Knight was looking down at me with a deep frown. My mouth fell open like a goldfish’s. Then her eyes also widened and twinkled like lit jewels when they met mine. I couldn't make out what color they were since it was more than one. It was like looking at a kaleidoscope or a greenish blue galaxy.
Wow, hybrid much?
The blonde girl said nothing and just stared and stared at me.
"I'm—I'm sorry—I must have taken your seat," I stammered. Her intense eyes made my hands shake as I closed the book and put it back into my bag. She had the strangest look on her face. It almost seemed restrained.
But then Mrs. Cowell, our science teacher came into the room.
"Alright children, please take a seat," she said in a clear strong voice. "Time to discover the wonder and joy of science!"
"Mrs. Cowell, we have a new student from Russia," some guy yelled, causing my head to turn away from that antagonistic stare.
"Who's that?" the teacher asked. I timidly raised my hand.
"Oh, may I see your slip, please?" she said.
At last, I had an excuse to escape that unsettling pair of blazing eyes. But when I was about to move away from the table, the teacher walked over and took the slip for herself. I was still left in my undeserving spot.
Mrs. Cowell signed the slip without making a fuss. But still felt uneasy standing there.
"Welcome to my class, Antonina Black, right?" the teacher handed me back the signed paper with a smile. "I guess you and Allecra are going to be partners from now on. Please take a seat so we can start our lesson."
My stomach did a somersault. Great, now I had no choice and neither had the girl. Keeping my eyes down, I took my seat again. There was this swagger-handsomeness in her posture when she turned and slumped herself on the chair. She crossed her arms and leaned herself back, resting her feet on the footrest of the table.
Then I heard her mumbling something I didn't understand. My hands balled into fists on my lap. Who does she think she is? I thought resentfully. It wasn't like I was dying to be near her or anything.
People turned their heads away from our table as Mrs. Cowell started the lesson. I dropped my eyes to my book and tried to read again, ignoring the tension.
We learned about stars. Now the teacher was discussing some light year distances and time.
"The light from the nearest stars to our earth takes four years to reach your eyes," Mrs. Cowell said. "Some of the stars might already die hundreds if not thousands of years ago. What you see now may just be their past."
A student raised his hand and asked, "Mrs. Cowell, so based on this theory, if an alien in a galaxy million light years away is looking at us through a telescope right now, what do they see?"
"I know!" another kid said. "They will see dinosaurs!"
A burst of laughter rang around the class.
"It's not possible," a brunette girl spoke up in protest. "Dinosaurs don't project light. The earth isn't a star that radiates light either, so they can't see anything."
"But did you know—" a glass-wearing guy who looked like a true science nerd said, "—that when you look in the mirror, you are seeing yourself a nanosecond ago?"
"So if I stand three feet away, do I look younger?" another student chimed in.
The goofy back row kids laughed and one of them said, "By my Einstein point of view, even from a million light years away, you're still one ugly dude!"
My lips twitched in amusement as I listened to them.
"Alright, kids, that's enough!" Mrs. Cowell said to hush her boisterous class. "For those of you who failed physics last year, I will explain to you again. It takes millions of years for an image to travel that far through space. So by the time the image of the earth gets to the alien, it would have been millions of years since. Plus, time and space are on the same continuum, so if you are traveling through or looking out into space, you're also traveling or looking out either backward or forwards in time."
I took note of that.
After a while, I felt Allecra's stare on the back of my head. I quickly stole a glance from the corner of my eyes and sure enough, she was looking at me, with no shame to hide the fact that she was being rude. My cheeks blushed hot. I bit my bottom lip. Then I heard her sort of groaned from the depth of her throat. I turned to the girl again. She had one
hand on her lower stomach. Her beautiful blonde brows knitted together. She looked like she was in pain.
"Are you okay?" I found myself asking out of concern. She shook her head.
"I'm fine," she said. Her voice made my heart falter. I had never heard a voice like this. Each word rolled off her tongue like harmonic music.
Can she be a little less perfect?
"You have a cramp?" I said again.
"Hmm."
"Are you on your period?" I asked in a low whisper, but she shot me an annoyed look. I was startled by her expression and also embarrassed by my own carelessness. I had to remind myself that some people were not that open about stuff like that.
After the lecture was over, the bell rang loudly, signaling the end of the lesson. I felt the weight of the tension rolled off my shoulders at last. The students rose from their seats and started stretching and yelling. I turned to Allecra Knight again, but she was not in her seat anymore. Then I caught a glimpse of her by the door. She moved away fluidly like a graceful ballerina and was gone.
~*~
Piper took me shopping after school. She said that was what she'd always dreamed of doing with a sister since Jay wasn't much of a sister to her. Pytor had given me loads of money before I came here, but my cousin insisted on buying me the things I wanted.
'For friendship's sake,' she said, but I guessed she was just feeling guilty about last morning.
We bought new clothes, shoes and make-up we didn't even plan on buying. At the end of the day, I was the one who felt guilty. Money probably grew on trees in the backyard of the Black’s house. One thing I noticed about my cousin was that she would give me compliments on something, but at the same time, she criticized herself.
"I like your legs," she had said. "Mine are too big."
"No, they're not," I said. "They look just fine as long as you could walk."
Piper laughed, but I wasn't trying a joke.
"Have you made any friends?"
"Not really." I shrugged as my hand brushed through a rack of summer t-shirts.
"Well," she said a bit hesitantly. "I heard from my friends' friends that you talked to Allecra Knight."
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