“Penny for your thoughts,” I said softly. He was making me extremely nervous.
The look I couldn’t quite understand disappeared from his face and was replaced with his usual casual expression.
“I’ll give you this one for free,” he answered. “I’ve been dreaming.”
I sat there looking into his face thinking he was going to tell me about them. What did it have to do with his gift? When he said nothing for about two minutes, I began to wonder how horrible they must be, and that maybe painting this was a bad idea.
“I don’t dream, Nari. I never have. Not once.”
Chapter Twenty-Seven
~Naminé~
I had a terrible headache. I tried to move and instantly screeched with pain. Where was I? I was lying somewhere, but this surely did not feel like my bed. I slowly tried to open my eyes. I squinted as I looked at the lantern hanging on the wall just above me. What had happened? I gradually turned my head and moved to sit up. I put my back up against the wall and winced in pain at the movement.
Calen’s cry of alarm hit me at full force, and I struggled to remain upright. She could now sense that I was conscious, but I could feel her cries of pain. I couldn’t physically hear, but I knew she shrieked loudly deep in the forest, flying around aimlessly and trying to relay her strength to help me. I desperately hoped no one would be close enough to hear her. If she were found, it would be the end of both of us.
It hurt to imagine it. She was my lifeline, my absolute center of strength. When we were solidly near each other, we were one, an inseparable line of where I ended and she began. Our bond was stupendous when together. But apart, it was like a piece of my soul was missing.
“Good Heavens, child. Are you all right?” I heard from a voice coming down the stairs.
I turned to look at the owner of the voice and saw it was Falla. I immediately remembered where I was and what I was doing. I didn’t know how long I had been lying there after I ran into the knight, only that I must get Falla to the injured griffins.
“F..f..alla,” I tried to get out. “We need you. Fire. Griffins. Hurt.”
“Yes, I can hear the ruckus from the window. Come lean on me child, and we shall go together.”
She helped me get up, and I rested into her as she wrapped me in her arm. We started to walk down the stairs. Just then, her Fëa, a small orange Petaurus peeked her wet pink nose out from under Falla’s light green vest and looked at me with her beady black eyes.
Falla reached up to pet the black stripe that ran from her nose to midway on her back, as she said, “This is Halta.”
I smiled at Halta as she slid back in the comfort of Falla’s vest.
When we reached the lower courtyard, Falla must have seen the seriousness of the situation, for she started moving faster and soon we were practically running to the stables. The fire had gone down some, and the men were hurdling barrels of water to at least save half of the structure.
I followed Falla outside to where the injured griffins were lying in the grass pasture. There were three seriously injured, and the rest were put in the gallery that ran alongside the back of the castle.
She turned to look at me. “We will need your help. Are you well?” I still felt a bit dizzy, but I wasn’t going anywhere. I nodded, and we took toward the griffins.
We approached the first griffin, and as she placed her hand on its head, Halta came out to sit on her shoulder. Falla clutched my hand for strength, closed her eyes and began the healing process. Twenty minutes later, we moved onto the next griffin. After it was healed, we moved to the third, which lay about a hundred feet away from the first two. I looked down, and tears stung my eyes as I saw it was a baby griffin. It moaned in pain and whimpered in anguish.
I looked to Falla who regarded me intently. “We must hurry…he’s dying.”
Chapter Twenty-Eight
~Nari~
I couldn’t stop thinking about what Rydan had said as I walked back to my house. When I had asked him what he meant, he told me to forget it, which was impossible for me to do. He then said my painting was beautiful and thanked me for it, but the pain in his voice had been evident.
I had felt like a failure. He had pulled me into a hug and explained that he loved it; he just had a lot on his mind and apologized for giving me the wrong impression. It did make me feel better, but try as I might, I could not get over the strange feeling his confession had left me with.
He had been dreaming. Which sounded innocent in itself, but the way he explained he had never once experienced a dream before now and how he said it made me extremely worried. Maybe I was being silly; I didn’t know. There was just something about his expression and the way he acted. It was like he was tortured emotionally but tried to hide it. I wished he would just tell me what was going on. He never indulged me with his feelings or serious things about his life. It drove me crazy!
When I reached the start of my driveway, my heart completely broke in two. Mycah stood against a tree, hands in his pockets, waiting to say goodbye to me. I didn’t want this moment to come. But here it was, whether I liked it or not, and there was nothing I could do about it. I shouldn’t let it affect me. I couldn’t...
The sun was setting, and as he looked at me from under his eyelashes, the glowing light from the sky caught the color of his ocean irises in such a way that I had trouble breathing. His midnight blue hair ruffled in the wind, his chiseled jaw clenched with some unnamed expression.
I didn’t realize I started walking toward him—an invisible force drawing me in without any thought to it. He pushed off the tree, and before I could say a single thing, he grabbed my left arm and pulled me backward, switching places with me. He pinned me against his body and the tree, jarring me from concentration.
I couldn’t breathe.
His sweet breath was ragged, causing his chest to move up and down, but I couldn’t feel it against my face. He was inches away and stared right into my eyes.
I started to get lost in the multi-facets of color in his eyes, the sun accentuating every detail. It looked like he wanted to say something. He furrowed his eyebrows, opened his mouth to talk, but quickly shut it again. It was quiet—only the sound of the wind-rustled leaves that surrounded us and my frantic heartbeat thrumming in my ears bound me to reality.
His gaze moved from my eyes to my mouth, and immediately my heart skipped a beat. My hands began to shake as he looked back up into my eyes and slowly tucked hair behind my ear, making my head spin. Please don’t say goodbye...
Blood accelerated under my skin as he moved his strong but gentle hand to the nape of my neck just before running his fingers up through my hair, cradling my head. His other hand wrapped around my waist, pulling me in closer. My body trembled from his touch.
He leaned in and slowly pressed his soft lips against mine, almost as if he were afraid I would shatter from the contact.
With my eyes closed, my heart felt like it was going to burst out of my chest as I brought my hands up and knotted my fingers in his hair, clutching him tighter and tighter to me, not seeming to get close enough. The force made him crush his lips to mine, melding them together, fueling the fire between us and igniting a frenzy. I could taste the salt of my tears as they freely fell down my face. Yep, this was goodbye.
As my burning lips parted, my breathing became erratic, almost matching my pounding heartbeat that drowned out all other sound, taking in his amazing woodsy scent that now surrounded me. He caressed the length of my jawline with his thumb and then held my chin as he continued to wildly kiss me.
Time seemed lost—like it never existed. I could feel his heartbeat against my chest and realized it was in sync with mine. I felt like I was soaring through space, seeing stars speed by and explode in the distance. I had never been kissed before and wondered if this was what it was like for everyone. I wanted this moment to last forever.
He reluctantly pulled away, and I already felt the loss of his lips rip a hole in my heart. His eyes were
wild, bright, and his expression was radiant, matching the kiss perfectly.
“I’m sorry,” he said roughly. “I...have wanted to do that for a long time. I couldn’t hold back anymore. I don’t want to.”
My heart soared as the words he just spoke slowly sunk in. I didn’t know what to say or how to respond. I wasn't even sure I comprehended what was happening right then—my brain didn’t seem to want to catch up.
He wiped the wet streaks my tears left behind with his thumbs and took my head in his hands while lightly kissing my forehead just where my hairline met my skin. I closed my eyes and didn’t want to open them again.
“I don’t want you to go,” I confessed while keeping my eyes closed.
“I have to protect you. It’s the only way you’ll stay safe,” he breathed in his velvety smooth voice. My body still trembled.
“I don’t need protection. And if you’re here, nothing will happen to me,” I appealed, believing every word. My voice was thick and filled with emotion.
“You have it backwards. You’ll only need protection if I stay.” His accent was alluring, making me step closer into him, if that was even possible. I nodded my head, still not knowing what to say or do. He caressed my cheekbone with his index finger before sliding his hand through strands of hair along my face. He smiled guiltily at me just before pulling away.
“I don’t care if you bring danger because you’ll be there to protect me. So it doesn’t matter, right?” I could feel myself panicking from the distance, not wanting to let him go.
“I may not be able to protect you. There are forces way more evil than you can even imagine. Secret underground organizations you happened to meet are child’s play in comparison,” he explained solemnly, eyes to the ground. I didn’t understand what he meant, and as my mind tried to register what he just said, I was left speechless. He started walking backward away from me, but I followed instinctively. “I’ll come back for you. When I finally take back what is rightfully mine, I’ll come back to fetch you. I promise,” he affirmed cryptically.
“I don’t understand what you’re saying,” I exclaimed, my breathing once again erratic, knowing he was slipping away. I reached out, trying to grab him in an effort to keep him from leaving.
“Don’t do this. Please. I can’t—” he stopped talking as he skipped forward, planting fiercely one more kiss on my lips. It distracted me, because when I opened my eyes a second later, he was gone.
I stood there in my driveway, holding my swollen lips in my fingers. I could feel my heart crumbling, but I had known this was coming. What I didn’t expect, however, was the amount of pain that descended upon me.
I ran inside the house completely lost and confused. He was gone. All I had left of him was a promise that he would come back, but when? When would that be? I flung myself onto my bed, desperately wanting to find solace in sleep. It was my only escape from pain—something I learned to do at a very young age.
I threw my blanket over my head and buried my face in my pillow, not able to keep the oncoming tears from falling a second more. And boy did they fall, like a never-ending stream, working to wash away all thoughts and feelings of Mycah. As my brain tried to purge his touch, his kiss, his smell, all-things-Mycah out of my heart, I knew it would never succeed.
I sobbed and sobbed until eventually I fell asleep.
I woke the next morning utterly spent and numb. Thoughts of Mycah lingered in the back of my head, but I refused to dwell on them. I pushed them back deep in the recesses of my mind where they wouldn’t hurt me. Where I could forget them. Zaylie called, confirming to pick me up at five this evening for the Homecoming Carnival. I didn’t want to go but couldn’t tell her no.
I tried to climb out of bed and instead fell to the floor, clutching my heart. Was I having a heart attack? It felt like something was missing inside of me, something I couldn’t live without. It was painful, as if a very piece of me was ripped away, brutally stolen from the tiniest parts of my marrow.
What was wrong with me? This couldn’t be normal. I slowly inhaled and exhaled, trying to steady my breathing. I needed to get a grip. This was completely ridiculous.
Suddenly, the sound of my phone ringing sent me lurching into the air. My god…I abruptly grabbed it, cursing under my breath. I was pretty sure I was traumatized. That was the only explanation for my insanity.
“Hello?” I answered without looking to see who it was first.
“What time do you want me to pick you up?” Rydan drawled with his deep voice on the other end of the line. I forgot he was going with me to the carnival.
“Oh, my friend Zaylie is picking me up, actually. We’re all going to the carnival, if that’s okay. Do you just want to meet us there? Or you can come here and we can all go together.” I hoped he chose the latter.
“What time?” he asked again.
“They’ll be at my house at five,” I answered, hopeful.
“I’ll be there. See you in a few hours,” he replied before hanging up. I looked at the clock and realized I had four and a half hours until then. That wasn’t much time. I hurried into the kitchen and found something to eat before starting on my mission. I’d have to quickly find a dress within my mom’s packed away clothes and just hope it didn’t take too long to come up with something good for the dance tomorrow night.
I could still feel the pain throughout my body, like it was part of my blood that pumped in and out of my heart, and it was all I could do to ignore it. It hurt, deeply and excruciatingly, but I couldn’t let anyone know. I had to learn to live with it. I didn’t know what was wrong with me, but I’d be darned if I let it affect my life and my new friendships.
Thankfully, Operation: "Find and Create Dress Pretty In Pink style," was a huge distraction from the crippling pain that lurked in my chest. I went upstairs into the attic and ran my fingers across my mother’s things. I opened gingerly one of her boxes marked "Dresses." Bless my organizational skills!
The smell of her perfume floated over me as I sifted through several of her dainty dresses, halting me. My eyes closed, and I took in a stronger inhalation of air through my nose. I had almost forgotten her scent, but now that it filled my lungs, I could swear she stood right next to me. I fought back tears and trudged on. If I let myself dwell on her, I would end up spiraling out of control over her and other depressing thoughts—thoughts I could never let myself think about if I wanted to get through today. All I wanted to do was forget. I spotted a simple black cocktail dress and pulled it out. It would work.
I grabbed the sewing machine and essential tools needed to complete the process and got started. I set my alarm to remind me to stop in three hours.
After doing all I could with the dress in the allotted time I was given, I jumped in the shower and started to get ready for the carnival.
I put on the first pair of dark wash jeans and long-sleeved shirt I saw, then threw my hair up into a messy bun on top of my head after drying it. The last thing I cared about was how I looked, and I didn’t feel an ounce of motivation to get ready. I had to force myself, wondering if the entire night was going to be like that. Or maybe the rest of my life…
A knock on the door signaled they were there, so I grabbed my coat and slipped on my faux leather boots. I opened the door to a grinning Zaylie, all done up and pretty.
“You look great!” I complimented her, admiring her beauty. She had a part of her dirty blonde hair in a braid with the rest left falling down in perfect ringlets and had simple makeup that complimented her features.
“Thanks! And you look…sad. Are you okay?” she asked full of concern, worry crinkling her face as she pulled me into a hug. Crap…I thought I was hiding it.
“Oh, I’m fine. Don’t worry about it. Ready to go?” I lied, not wanting to think about it. I looked past her to the truck sitting in my driveway that blared punk music as Desmond and Liam bounced up and down.
“Sure,” she said skeptically, not believing me. Just then, Rydan pulled up on his mo
torcycle as I finished locking the door behind me. He wore his dark canvas jacket and black jeans that hung loosely from his hips, exuding suaveness, per usual. I practically ran to him, needing his calming effect, and pushed my body into his. He returned the gesture, rightly discerning I needed it. I didn’t care that there were other people around watching us. He was my best friend, and only he could make me feel better.
“Rydan, this is Zaylie. Zaylie, this is my best friend Rydan.” I let go of Rydan and introduced them once I felt Zaylie walk up behind us. Liam and Desmond got out of the truck after they saw him pull up, so I introduced Desmond too.
“It’s nice to meet you,” Zaylie said while both boys said “hey” and shook Rydan’s hand.
“I’ve heard a lot about you,” he said to Zaylie and Desmond. “And it’s been a long time, Liam. How’s it going?” He acknowledged that he remembered Liam from before when we all used to go to school together—back before Liam moved away.
“It’s been good, man. How 'bout you?” Liam replied.
“Just great,” he answered with a half smile, but only I noticed the sarcasm. Rydan had been hiding something from me for a while, and it hurt each time I noticed it. But now I was hiding something from him as well, making us even.
We all got in the old blue pickup truck that Desmond and Zaylie shared. Zaylie drove with me in the middle and Rydan in the passenger seat while Desmond and Liam sat in the bed, having way too much fun. They were like dogs enjoying the wind, and Zaylie swerved every now and then, sending them sliding across each side, encouraging their crazy antics. Before last night I would have found it hilarious, but today I had to force myself to laugh along. I took Rydan’s hand and intertwined my fingers with his, desperate for his touch. He kissed the top of my head in a brotherly way and chuckled when Zaylie took a sharp turn that sent Desmond almost falling over the side and screaming like a girl. I rolled my eyes, not able to keep from genuinely laughing that time.
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