by Adair Rymer
I couldn't hear what Deadeye was saying, we were too far away.
“Damnit, I'm trying to help you! Lobos have your fucking daughter, man! I'm coming in, unarmed so do not shoot” Remy lied, he was thinking on his feet. Kidnapping wasn't part of the plan.
With his hands up, Remy walked into the clubhouse, then abruptly dove to one side and was out of sight. There were gunshots then the rest of the Lobos charged in. Then there a lot more gunshots. God, I hoped he was alright.
Now I was completely alone. No help was coming for me. I needed to handle this myself regardless if Remy was ok or not. Before Roughneck could turn back to me I charged him.
It was amazing the things you remembered when you needed to. Over the last few weeks Remy had casually trained me in a lot of things. We'd be fooling around and he'd tell me that if anyone ever attacked me I should go for the eyes, throat, groin or knees.
When we collided into the side of the dumpster Roughneck's revolver fired over my shoulder. Instantly my world was nothing but that constant “eeeee” noise. It was unbelievably loud. I could still see but the sound was so jarring that I became disoriented. We toppled to the ground then somehow he was on top of me, his hands around my throat.
His grip was shockingly strong for a man in his mid seventies. I couldn't breath. The more I thrashed and clawed at him, the more he squeezed. My vision started to go fuzzy and white around the edges. I tried to knee him in the groin but he laid on me side-saddle and I couldn't get the right angle. I reached for the gun but had no idea where it ended up. My god I was going to die, strangled by an old man in a parking lot.
What would Remy do? Frantic and desperate, I jammed a finger into each eye. My nails punctured them as easily as if I pushed them through soft-boiled eggs. Blood and liquids ran between my fingers down my palm and forearm. I still couldn't hear anything but I saw him screaming and I know I must have been screaming too or I would have if he let me breath.
Roughneck still wouldn't let go so I pushed harder. I felt my fingertips bottom out, my nails scraped against the bones behind his eyes. Only then did he finally let me go.
I gasped, taking in only as much air as I could scream out. I kicked and slid myself away form him. My arm was covered in liquids, I could feel the pulp under my nails and wanted to tear my own fingers off! It was the most disgusting thing that I'd ever been forced to do. I rolled onto my stomach and just tried to breath while frantically wiping whatever I could off onto my jeans. I fought waves of rolling nausea and I couldn't stop shaking.
Then I realized I wasn't shaking. The ground was shaking. All of it. What the hell was that? It felt like I was standing on the tracks of an oncoming train.
Roughneck had a hand over his face, he was blindly sweeping the ground for his gun. He found it a moment later and immediately fired it in whichever direction he thought I was in. He was insane! The bullet missed me but only barely. This man would not stop until I was dead. I only had two options, run away and hope he never sent anyone to kill me for blinding him or finish it right now.
I kicked the gun out of his hand into the fence. I ran over and picked it up. This psychopath was trying to kill me! Me, Star. Not because I was standing near Remy or because I was in the wrong place at the wrong time. My mind replayed the image of Rio tumbling off the truck bed after I shot him in the stomach at Muse's place. I didn't have the strength or resolve to kill him then so Remy did it for me. Remy wasn't here this time. It was just me, a gun and a man who wanted me dead.
I decided something that Remy probably decided for himself at one point. No one gets to try and kill me then just walk away. It was like I had an epiphany. Everything just made sense. All the pieces fit. This was what you did when people tried to kill you. I put the gun into Roughneck's back and calmly squeezed the trigger like Remy taught me.
The front of his chest exploded. My ears were still muted aside from that constant “eeeee” sound. I put two more rounds into him just to be sure. There wasn't any noise so I didn't even flinch. The gun barrel smoked for a second from the rapid firing before being cleaned by a gently breeze.
I had just murdered a man.
Only then did the realization of where I was strike me like a falling tree branch. I dropped into a crouch and threw myself behind the dumpster Expecting people to be shooting at me. I had just murdered one of the founding members of Los Lobos! How could there not be at least a dozen angry bikers coming for me?
I had no idea how many shots had been fired and I didn't know how to check. Remy never trained me on revolvers. After a few seconds I peeked my head out, gun first ready to kill again if necessary. What I wasn't prepared for was what I saw next.
Having temporarily lost my hearing I didn’t see the new bikers pull in. There must have been dozens or at least a hundred Steel Veins that had rode in. I was catching the tail end of the brutal firefight, the Lobos outside had been devastated. Almost every one of them had been, or was currently being, slaughtered.
Remy's plan had come together! We won!
Remy had Tee secretly contact all the other Steel Veins chapters and set up a different location for the annual, rather than their clubhouse. When I texted Tee, he took the rest of his chapter to the new location to meet all the members from all over that had already arrived. All the while telling Deadeye god-knows-what to keep his crew at the Leslie clubhouse while they were gone. The Lobos came in while everyone was away and killed Deadeye's crew then all the Veins reinforcements came and killed the Lobos before they could escape.
Most of the poisonous Steel Veins members were wiped out by their rivals, the Lobos, thus cleaning the cancer out of Remy's club. The remaining Veins chapters were united, stronger than ever, against a common threat and righteously destroyed the Lobos.
I still couldn't believe it worked!
We weren't out of the woods yet though, Remy still had to convince the Veins not to kill us. Where was Remy? Shouldn't he be out by now? I couldn't see Remy anywhere. My throat tightened back up, a million things could've gone wrong in that clubhouse. Remy was brilliant but some things just couldn't be planned, like this whole Roughneck thing.
All the gunfire outside had stopped. Not that I cared. All that mattered was that I got to Remy, gunfire be damned! I ran through the throng of bikers, the Steel Veins and the dead and the dying Lobos, to get inside the clubhouse.
Right before I got to the door it was kicked open by a bloodied, and beaten up, Spyder and he had a shotgun. He had me dead to rights I was running right at him, I couldn't stop. Just prior to the gun firing I felt a massive hand clamp down on my arm and jerk me so hard to the side that I lifted off the ground. My arm immediately popped out of its socket. I slapped against the pavement like a fresh slab of beef and immediately covered my ears to protect my slowly returning hearing from all the gunfire that was about to happen.
The gigantic form that stood over me, the one that had jerked me to the side, that saved my life, was Top. Remy's brother!
Top started at the man's groin and walked his gunshots up Spyder's midsection. Then the rest of the Veins with a clear shot opened up on him as well. Bits and chunks were blown off the Lobo, it was just too gruesome. I had to look away.
The giant loomed over me until Spyder finally fell. I prayed he didn't recognize me. If I could have melted into the asphalt I would've. Top terrified me since the second he forced himself into my life.
“You alright, Star?” He looked down at me through his massive beard and extended a hand to help me up. I recoiled at the sound of my name but it was only because of instinct. This time when he said it, there was no sarcasm or malice in his voice. It sounded like genuine concern.
He grabbed my waist and helped me up gently.
“Don't be afraid, I won't hurt you. Promise.” His features softened considerably from what I remembered back at the gas station and at Muse. This man had also just saved my life but I couldn't just shake all the other stuff off. Last time I saw him, he had tried to rape me or kil
l me or both!
“Your arm needs settin', will you let me?” Top asked.
“Oh god! Remy!” I just realized that he was still in there and a Lobo with a shotgun walked out.
“Easy, I got good men in there. They're pullin' him out. You gon' let me set that?” Top extended his massive hand again.
Hesitantly, I nodded. What else could I do? I certainly couldn't help Remy like this and it looked like the cavalry had arrived anyways. Top popped my shoulder back in. It hurt like hell but I was able to stifle the scream. Top stepped back to give me some space. He even looked impressed at how I was able to deal with the pain.
“I know it don't change anything but I want you to know. I'm sorry about everything that went down at the gas station. About what I did to you at Muse's. My brother's death fucked me all up and I was out of my mind. I don't expect forgiveness but I just needed you to know that.” Top struggled through the words but there they were, as plain as day.
“Ah... ” I didn't know what to say that. I could deal with damn near anything these days but this... This was never a conversation I imagined would ever happen, let alone an apology! I was dumbfounded.
The door swung open again. Several members dragged Deadeye out. I was surprised to see him still alive. Between the Lobos and Remy I was sure he'd be dead but there he was, beaten and with a few holes in him but still alive.
Then Remy walked out. He was covered in blood but I didn't think most of it was his.
My legs were moving toward him before I even registered it and within seconds I had my arms wrapped around him. I pressed my lips into his, his mouth was bloody from a hit he must have taken but I didn't care about the rusty, metallic taste on his teeth. All I cared about was that he was alive.
He put an arm around me and embraced me like he hadn't seen me in years. I never wanted him to let me go. If this were a fairy tale, all the Steel Veins would've been clapping and cheering. But this wasn't a fairy tale.
Over Remy's shoulder, I saw only the aftermath of carnage. Friends had been killed, injuries were sustained and occasionally gunfire would ring out to finish off wounded Lobos.
“Rem,” Top said with his arms extended. “Brother, it's damn good to see—”
“Lawrence! Down!” Remy called out to his brother but it was too late.
A bullet jerked the big man toward us slightly. There was a look of confusion on Top's face like he wasn't sure what had happened. Quickly realizing that he'd been shot, the confusion was replaced with resignation then rigid determination. He might as well have been bolted to the ground, Top wasn't going anywhere.
Bones had been hiding behind a car in the back of the parking lot this whole time. Knowing he'd be spotted eventually, Bones stood up when no one was paying attention and fired at Remy. Top had walked in the way at the last second and taken the round. Then seeing that he'd missed, Bones unloaded the rest of his handgun at us.
Despite Remy's warning, Top refused to move or fall, his massive form was the only thing standing between us and Bones' vengeance. Bullet after bullet slammed into Top but the big man held his ground, protecting his brother the only way he could now. Maybe even attempting to make amends for all that he'd done. The last bullet caught Top in the head and even then he stubbornly stood for a moment before finally toppling.
Remy knew immediately that his brother Lawrence “Top” was dead and unbridled rage became him.
“No!” Remy screamed, breaking off into a full sprint at Bones. “He's mine!” The Veins stayed their hands and let this play itself out.
Bones reloaded as fast as he could. He slammed the magazine in and fired at Remy. A bullet punched right through Remy's shoulder as he dove over the car and crashed into him. The bullet didn't slow Remy in the slightest, they disappeared behind the car. Bones' gun fired several more times.
“No...” I disregarded the gunfire and ran around the side of the car as fast as my scraped and bruised legs would carry me. I had to help Remy if I could! If it wasn't already too late.
The parking lot had quieted enough for me to clearly make out the sickening crack of blow after vicious, raining blow.
“¡Hablo español, pedazo de mierda! I understood everything you said!” Remy paused his onslaught just long enough to screamed the words into the face of an unresponsive Bones.
One glance at Bones mangled face was enough to know that he wouldn't last long. I reached out to Remy, to stop him but then stopped myself and looked away. I could've stopped, pulled him from the dark path he spiraled down. But I knew deep down that he needed this. To finally expend all that rage he had bottled up over the years.
Neither he nor Bones uttered another word during the beating but I knew Remy was screaming at the man in his own head. Every strike was for Maria, for Top, and for all the bullets and pain he'd endured at the hands of that man and his wretched club.
I could've stopped Remy but I didn't want to. In my heart I knew Bones deserved it just like Roughneck deserved it. All the Lobos deserved what they got. The part of me that protested, that said this kind of brutality, no matter how justified, was wrong, quieted a little more with each of Remy's blows to Bones.
Remy's path would always be one of violence. I didn't see that changing any time soon and I realized fully that I was alright with that. I accepted it. I was a part of it now. No guilt, no remorse and no mercy. This was a hard world but then, so was I.
I opened my eyes and just watched.
Finally Remy's scarred fists lifted from the sanguinary pulp of what was once Bones' face, gore slid from his chiseled arms. It was over. All of it.
My Remy looked up at me and realized that I'd been right there watching it all. The rage on his features melted away in an instant, his eyes welled with the spent tears of years of anger and pain. He looked exhausted from so much vented emotion.
“Star...” I knew he was trying to find the words to apologize for that dark merciless side of him that I'd just witnessed.
I could read it plainly on his face, he was worried that he'd frightened me away by revealing his true self. He was worried that he'd just lost me. It was the fear that, the only person that he couldn't save me from, was himself. I'd seen him face almost certain death on several occasions, seen him defy his family and turn his back on his whole life but it was only right now, looking at only me, that I'd ever seen Remy truly scared.
Right then, any worry about him losing control on me, of him being more killer than man, vanished. Whatever depths of violence Remy was capable of was dwarfed by his concern for me and what I thought of him. In all the world, no matter what happened, only I was completely safe from Remy.
The only thing he couldn't recover from— The only thing he was really scared of... was losing me.
I didn't care if the world burned around us or what happened next as long as I had him.
“I...”
“Did what was necessary.” I finished his sentence the way it was meant to be said and hugged him with all of my strength.
“No,” he whispered. I could hear it in his voice and feel it in his embrace. He'd come to realize that I accepted him, completely accepted him, for all that he was. That he could show me anything, everything, and that I couldn't be scared off. I was his. “I... Love you.”
Chapter 6
Remy
My last brother was dead.
As much as I wanted to hide in Star's arms forever I was drawn to Top. I've known him, in some capacity, my whole life. If I didn't sit with him or grab his hand or fucking something, then I wouldn't know for sure that it was real and that he was really dead.
My knees struck the black pavement, which was slick with my brother's blood. Bones last bullet caught him in the back of the skull and blew out the front of his right eyebrow. It was damn hard to look at.
Top kept a bandana tied to his belt. I unknotted it, opened it up and laid it over his face. He looked ridiculous with his giant beard sticking out the bottom. In my head I could almost hear him complain
about it.
Lawrence was a hard man. I was at odds with him almost as much as I wasn't. We've been through a lot together and sometimes things got messy. Real messy. Like what he tried to do to Star. I never would've been able to fully forgive him for that but in his fucked up way he was always trying to protect me.
“Goddamnit.” I sharply drew in breath and fought back tears. In the end of it all, he did exactly that. Protected me. Protected us. I would never forget that. I looked over at Star, her sadness for me was painful to see. “Goddamnit.” I barely registered the words as they slipped out.
“Fuck, man... I'm sorry,” I breathed the words to him. The asphalt beneath us was beaten to shit. There was a little patch that was worn down to gravel, Top's blood had flowed into it. I ran my fingers across a shrinking dry spot, scooping up the pulverized bits into my fist and crushing it.
I've lost so much.
Tee keeled down beside me and put a hand on my shoulder. I couldn't look at him just yet. I let the gravel slip between my fingers. Watched it fall. Both my brothers were dead.
When the gun barrel was pushed into the back of my head it wasn't a surprise. I couldn't find in me to move. Fortunately I had some friends here. Tee slapped it away just as quick as I'd felt it.
“The fuck are you doing, Deadeye!” Tee shoved the wounded president backwards.
“Killing the traitorous shit that caused all this! Poet was working with the Lobos!” That statement by the national president turned every members head at us.
I still hadn't stood up but I could hear the unrest through the ranks. No one wanted to believe it but they had to take it extra seriously because of who said it. I didn't have a lot of close friends in the extended club but for whatever reason most of them respected me, even beyond the SR patch that was supposed to set us all on even footing.