by Kami Garcia
“Just big enough for, like, your phone and your lip gloss.” Charlotte pushed it toward Lena. “Go on. Open it.”
Lena took the package in her hands, and smiled at them. “Savannah, Emily, Eden, Charlotte. You have absolutely no idea what this means to me.” The sarcasm was lost on them. I knew exactly what it was, and exactly what it meant to her.
Stupid to the power of stupid.
Lena couldn’t look me in the eye, or we both would have burst out laughing. As we made our way back into the crowd of dancers, Lena tossed the little silver package into the bonfire. The orange and yellow flames ate their way through the wrapping, until the tiny metallic purse was nothing but smoke and ash.
The Holy Rollers took a break, and Link came over to bask in the glory of his musical debut. “I told ya we were good. Just one step away from a contract.” Link elbowed me in the ribs like old times.
“You were right, man. You guys were great.” I had to give him that, even if he did have the lollipop on his side.
Savannah Snow sauntered up, most likely to burst Link’s bubble. “Hey, Link.” She batted her eyes suggestively.
“Hey, Savannah.”
“Do you think you could save me a dance?” It was unbelievable. She was standing there, staring at him like he was a real rock star.
“I just don’t know what I’ll do if I don’t get one.” She gave him another Snow Queen smile. I felt like I was trapped in one of Link’s dreams, or Ridley’s.
Speak of the devil. “Hands off, Prom Queen. This is my Hot Rod.” Ridley draped her arm, and a few other key parts, around Link to make her point.
“Sorry, Savannah. Maybe next time.” Link stuck his drumsticks in his back pocket and headed back onto the dance floor with Ridley and her R-rated dance moves. It must have been the greatest moment of his life. You would’ve thought it was his birthday.
After the song ended, he hopped back onto the stage. “We got one last song, written by a good friend a mine, for some very special people at Jackson High. You’ll know who you are.” The stage went dark. Link unzipped his hoodie, and the lights went up with the twang of the guitar. He was wearing a Jackson Angels T-shirt with the sleeves ripped off, looking as ridiculous on Link as he intended it to. If only his mother could see him now.
He leaned into the microphone and began to do a little Casting of his own.
“Fallin’ angels all around me
Misery spreads misery
Your broken arrows are killin’ me.
Why can’t you see?
The thing you hate becomes your fate
Your destiny, Fallen Angel.”
Lena’s song, the one she wrote for Link.
As the music swelled, every card-carrying Angel swayed to the anthem targeted at them. Maybe it was all Ridley, and maybe it wasn’t. The thing is, by the time the song was over, and Link had tossed his winged T-shirt into the bonfire, it felt like a few more things were going up in flames along with it. Everything that had seemed so hard, so insurmountable for so long, just sort of went up in smoke.
Long after the Holy Rollers had stopped playing, even when Ridley and Link were nowhere to be found, Savannah and Emily were still being nice to Lena, and the whole basketball team was suddenly speaking to me again, I looked for some small sign, a lollipop, anywhere. The lone, telltale thread that could come loose to unravel the whole sweater.
But there was nothing. Just the moon, the stars, the music, the lights, and the crowd. Lena and I weren’t even dancing anymore, but were still clinging to each other. We swayed back and forth, the current of heat and cold and electricity and fear pulsing through my veins. As long as there was any music at all, we were in our own little bubble. We weren’t alone in our cave under her covers anymore, but it was still perfect.
Lena pulled back gently, the way she did when something was on her mind, and stared up at me. Like she was looking at me for the first time.
“What’s wrong?”
“Nothing. I—” She bit her lower lip nervously, and took a deep breath. “It’s just, there’s something I want to tell you.”
I tried to read her thoughts, her face, anything. Because I was starting to feel like it was the week before Christmas break all over again, and we were standing in the hall at Jackson, instead of in the field at Greenbrier. My arms were still around her waist, and I had to resist the urge to hold her tighter, to make sure she couldn’t get away.
“What is it? You can tell me anything.”
She put her hands on my chest. “In case something happens tonight, I wanted you to know—”
She looked into my eyes, and I heard it as clearly as if she had whispered it in my ear, except it meant more than it ever could have if she had spoken the words aloud. She said them in the only way that had ever mattered between us. The way we had found each other from the beginning. The way we always found our way back.
I love you, Ethan.
For a second, I didn’t know what to say, because “I love you” didn’t seem like enough. It didn’t say everything I wanted to say—that she had saved me from this town, from my life, my dad. From myself. How can three words say all that? They can’t, but I said them anyway, because I meant them.
I love you, too, L. I think I always have.
She settled back into me, resting her head on my shoulder, and I felt her hair warm against my chin. And I felt something else. That part of her I thought I would never be able to reach, the part she kept closed off to the world. I felt it open up, just long enough to let me in. She was giving me a piece of herself, the only piece that was really hers. I wanted to remember this feeling, this moment, like a snapshot I could go back to whenever I wanted.
I wanted it to stay this way forever.
Which, it turns out, was exactly five more minutes.
2.11
Lollipop Girl
Lena and I were still swaying to the music when Link elbowed his way through the crowd. “Hey, man, I’ve been lookin’ for you everywhere.” Link bent over and put his hands on his knees for a second, trying to catch his breath.
“Where’s the fire?”
Link looked worried, which was unusual for a guy who spent most of his time trying to figure out how to hook up and hide from his mom at the same time. “It’s your dad. He’s up on the balcony a the Fallen Soldiers, in his pajamas.”
According to the South Carolina Visitor’s Guide, the Fallen Soldiers was a Civil War Museum. But really it was just Gaylon Evans’ old house, which was full of his Civil War memorabilia. Gaylon left his house and his collection to his daughter, Vera, who was so desperate to become a member of the DAR she let Mrs. Lincoln and her cronies restore the house and turn it into Gatlin’s one and only museum.
“Great.” Embarrassing me in our house wasn’t enough. Now my dad had decided to venture out. Link looked confused. He probably expected me to be surprised that my dad was wandering around in his pajamas. He had no idea this was an everyday occurrence. I realized how little Link actually knew about my life these days, considering he was my best friend—my only friend.
“Ethan, he’s out on the balcony, like he’s gonna jump.”
I couldn’t move. I heard what he was saying, but I couldn’t react. Lately, I was ashamed of my dad. But I still loved him, crazy or not, and I couldn’t lose him. He was the only parent I had left.
Ethan, are you okay?
I looked at Lena, at those big green eyes full of concern. Tonight I could lose her, too. I could lose them both.
“Ethan, did you hear me?”
Ethan, you have to go. It’s going to be okay.
“Come on, man!” Link was pulling me. The rock star was gone. Now he was just my best friend, trying to save me from myself. But I couldn’t leave Lena.
I’m not going to leave you here. Not by yourself.
Out of the corner of my eye, I noticed Larkin coming toward us. He had untangled himself from Emily for a minute. “Larkin!”
“Yeah, what’s up?�
� He seemed to sense something was going on, and actually looked concerned, for a guy whose general expression was disinterest.
“I need you to take Lena back to the house.”
“Why?”
“Just promise you’ll take her back to the house.”
“Ethan, I’ll be fine. Just go!” Lena was pushing me toward Link. She looked as scared as I felt. But I didn’t move.
“Yeah, man. I’ll take her back right now.”
Link gave me a final jerk, and we were tearing through the crowd. Because we both knew I might be a few minutes away from being a guy with two dead parents.
We ran through the overgrown fields of Ravenwood, toward the road and the Fallen Soldiers. The air was already thick with smoke from the mortar, compliments of the Battle of Honey Hill, and every few seconds you could hear a round of rifle fire. The evening campaign was in full force. We were getting close to the edge of Ravenwood Plantation, where Ravenwood ended and Greenbrier began. I could see the yellow ropes that marked the Safe Zone, glowing in the darkness.
What if we were too late?
The Fallen Soldiers was dark. Link and I took the steps two at a time, trying to get up the four flights as quickly as possible. When we got to the third landing, instinctively, I stopped. Link sensed it, the same way he sensed when I was going to pass him the ball when I was trying to run out the clock, and stopped alongside me. “He’s up here.”
But I couldn’t move. Link read my face. He knew what I was afraid of. He had stood next to me at my mom’s funeral, passing out all those white carnations for folks to put on her coffin, while my dad and I stared at the grave like we were dead, too.
“What if… what if he’s already jumped?”
“No way. I left Rid with him. She’d never let that happen.” The floor felt like it dropped out from under me.
If she used her power on you, and she told you to jump off a cliff—you’d jump.
I pushed past Link, up the stairs, and scanned the hallway. All the doors were shut, except one. Moonlight spilled onto the perfectly stained pine floorboards.
“He’s in there,” Link said, but I already knew that.
When I entered the room, it was like going back in time. The DAR had really done their job in here. There was a huge stone fireplace at one end, with a long wooden mantel, lined with tapered wax candles, dripping as they burned. The eyes of fallen Confederates stared back from the sepia portraits hanging on the wall, and across from the fireplace was an antique four-poster bed. But something was out of place, disrupting the authenticity. It was a smell, musky and sweet. Too sweet. A mix of danger and innocence, even though Ridley was anything but innocent.
Ridley was standing next to the open balcony doors, her blond hair twisting in the wind. The doors were thrown open, and the dusty, billowy drapes were blowing into the room, like they had been forced inside by a rush of air. Like he had already jumped.
“I found him,” Link called to Ridley, catching his breath again.
“I can see that. How’s it goin’, Short Straw?” Ridley smiled her sickly sweet smile. It made me want to simultaneously smile back and throw up.
I walked over to the doors slowly, afraid he might not be out there. But he was. Standing on the narrow ledge, on the wrong side of railing, in his flannel pajamas and bare feet. “Dad! Don’t move.”
Ducks. There were mallard ducks on his pajamas, which seemed out of place, considering he might be about to jump off of a building.
“Don’t come any closer, Ethan. Or I’ll jump.” He sounded lucid, determined, and clearer than he had in months. He almost sounded like my dad again. That’s how I knew it wasn’t really him talking, at least, not on his own. This was all Ridley, the Power of Persuasion in overdrive.
“Dad, you don’t want to do that. Let me help you.” I took a few steps toward him.
“Stop right there!” he shouted, holding his hand out in front of him to make his point.
“You don’t want his help, do you, Mitchell? You just want some peace. You just want to see Lila again.” Ridley was leaning against the wall, her lollipop poised and ready.
“Don’t you say my mother’s name, witch!”
“Rid, what are you doin’?” Link was standing in the doorway.
“Stay out of this, Shrinky Dink. You’re way out of your league here.”
I stepped in front of Ridley, putting myself between her and my dad as if my body could somehow deflect her power. “Ridley, why are you doing this? He has nothing to do with Lena or me. If you want to hurt me, hurt me. Just leave my dad out of it.”
She threw her head back and laughed, a sultry and wicked sound. “I could care less about hurting you, Short Straw. I’m just doing my job. It’s nothing personal.”
My blood ran cold.
Her job.
“You’re doing this for Sarafine.”
“Come on, Short Straw, what did you expect? You saw how my uncle treats me. The whole family thing, not really an option for me right now.”
“Rid, what are you talkin’ about? Who’s Sarafine?” Link walked toward her. She looked at him. For a second, I thought I saw something pass across Ridley’s face, just a flicker, but something real. Something that looked almost like genuine emotion.
But Ridley shook it off, and as quickly as it came, it was gone. “I think you want to go back to the party, don’t you, Shrinky Dink? The band is warming up for the second set. Remember, we’re recording this show for your new demo. I’m going to take it around to some of the labels in New York myself,” she purred, staring intently at him. Link looked uncertain, like maybe he did want to go back to the party, but he wasn’t sure.
“Dad, listen to me. You don’t want to do this. She’s controlling you. She can influence people, it’s what she does. Mom would never want you to do this.” I watched for some sign that my words were registering, that he was listening. But there was nothing. He just stared into the darkness. You could hear the sound of bayonets clashing and the battle cries of middle-aged men in the distance.
“Mitchell, you have nothing to live for anymore. You’ve lost your wife, you can’t write anymore, and Ethan will be going to college in a few years. Why don’t you ask him about the shoebox full of college brochures under his bed? You’ll be all alone.”
“Shut up!”
Ridley turned to face me, unwrapping a cherry lollipop. “I’m sorry about this, Short Straw. I really am. But everyone has a part to play, and this is mine. Your dad is going to have a little accident tonight. Just like your mom did.”
“What did you say?” I knew Link was talking, but I couldn’t hear his voice. I couldn’t hear anything but what she had just said, replaying over and over in my head.
Just like your mom did.
“Did you kill my mother?” I started advancing. I didn’t care what kind of powers she had. If she killed my mother…
“Settle down, big boy. It wasn’t me. That was a little before my time.”
“Ethan, what the hell’s goin’ on?” Link was beside me.
“She’s not what she seems, man. She’s…” I didn’t know how to explain it so Link would understand. “She’s a Siren. It’s like a witch. And she’s been controlling you just like she’s controlling my dad right now.”
Link started to laugh. “A witch. You’re losin’ it, man.”
I didn’t take my eyes off Ridley. She smiled and ran her fingers through Link’s hair. “Come on baby, you know you love a bad girl.”
I had no idea what she was capable of, but after her little demonstration at Ravenwood, I knew she could kill any one of us. I should never have treated her like she was just some harmless party girl. I was in over my head. I was only just beginning to realize how far.
Link looked from her to me. He didn’t know what to believe.
“I’m not kidding, Link. I should have told you sooner, but I swear I’m telling the truth. Why else would she be trying to kill my father?”
Link started to
pace. He didn’t believe me. He probably thought I was going crazy. It sounded crazy to me, even as I was saying it. “Ridley, is that true? Have you been usin’ some kinda power on me this whole time?”
“If you want to split hairs.”
My dad let go of the railing with one hand. He extended his arm like he was trying to balance on a tightrope.
“Dad, don’t do it!”
“Rid, don’t do this.” Link was walking toward her, slowly. I could hear the chain from his wallet jingling.
“Didn’t you hear what your friend said? I’m a witch. A bad one.” She took off her shades, revealing those golden feline eyes. I could hear Link’s breath catch in his throat, as if he was really seeing her for the first time. But only for a second.
“Maybe you are, but you aren’t all bad. I know that. We’ve spent time together. We’ve shared things.”
“That was part of the plan, Hot Rod. I needed an in, so I could stay close to Lena.”
Link’s face dropped. Whatever Ridley had done to him, whatever she had Cast, his feelings for her were bigger than that. “So it was all crap? I don’t believe you.”
“Believe what you want, it’s the truth. As close to the truth as I’m capable of, anyway.”
I watched my dad shift his weight, his free arm still stretched outward, swaying up and down. It seemed like he was trying to test his wings, to see if he could fly. A few feet away, an artillery shell hit the ground outside and a spray of dirt burst into the air.
“What about everything you told me about you and Lena growin’ up together? How you two were like sisters? Why would you want to hurt her?” Something passed across her face. I wasn’t sure, but it almost looked like regret. Was that possible?
“It’s not up to me. I’m not the one calling the shots. Like I said, this is my job. Get Ethan away from Lena. I’ve got nothing against this old guy, but his mind is weak. You know, one biscuit short of a picnic.” She licked her lollipop. “He was just an easy target.”
Get Ethan away from Lena.
This whole thing was a diversion to separate us. I could hear Arelia’s voice as clearly as if she was still kneeling over me.