by Justin Lloyd
Meanwhile, the “Family Album” hourlong special was such a success that a full-length feature film was written to feature Jim in a new comedic role. The movie was titled “Dr. Otto and the Riddle of the Gloom Beam.” It was written by Coke Sams and John Cherry with Jim and Ernest writers Daniel Butler, Glenn Petach and Steve Leasure contributing additional dialogue. It was filmed in the Nashville area in about three weeks during the latter part of 1984. The entire production took only five months with a budget of just under $1 million.
The movie’s plot is as offbeat as the title. Mad scientist Dr. Otto creates a magnetic ray capable of erasing credit cards and computer tapes across the globe. Dr. Otto speaks with a German accent and often unleashes an evil laugh during the execution of his dastardly deeds. The doctor’s appearance is indescribably weird. His costume resembles a pair of football shoulder pads decorated like a tacky Christmas tree, with twinkling lights and all. One scene reveals the white socks and black dress shoes that complement the look. The most outlandish aspect of his appearance is the human hand (belonging to Ernest writer Glenn Petach) that rests atop Otto’s head like a hat. Like an animal tail, the movements of the hand seem to reflect his moods.
Dr. Otto’s nemesis is Lance Sterling, an all-American type who has been a thorn in Otto’s side since a grade-school science fair. Jim portrays a variety of characters, which would become a hallmark of every feature Cherry directed him in. There is the tough-talking Aussie Rudd Hardtact, Laughin’ Jack the pirate, the rich snob Guy Dandy and the dour Auntie Nelda. All are different identities Dr. Otto embodies to keep Lance Sterling off his trail.
The movie’s humor can best be described as Monty Python in its style. Jim and the Ernest writers were fans of British humor. Jim also enjoyed specific English comedians such as Rowan Atkinson and Tracy Ullman. A separate movie title was actually created for European fans to appeal more to their presumed offbeat sense of humor. That title, “Never Get Poop on Your Shoes,” was a reference to a line Dr. Otto uses to describe the ability of the film’s hero, Lance Sterling, to go through life virtually unscathed. Jim had a movie poster with the alternate “Poop” title hanging on one of the walls in his kitchen (of all places) for years.
One of the interviews Jim gave in busy 1984 was to Arch Campbell at WRC-TV during a promotional tour in Washington, D.C. Campbell mentioned how Clara Peller from the Wendy’s “Where’s The Beef?” ads was already becoming passé and asked Jim why his commercials were still going strong. Appearing as Ernest, Jim mentioned that Clara had made only a few commercials compared to the nearly 900 that he had made. At the end of the interview, Jim was asked what advice he had for Vern. Jim looked right into the camera and replied, “Walk slow, and drink a lot of water.” When the cameras returned to the studio following the segment, Campbell roared with laughter before telling his fellow anchors how much he had enjoyed talking to Jim. He said that Jim was a “very nice guy,” and added, a touch surprised, “very shy too.”
Jim closed out the year on the road. This time he was in Houston with some of his country-music friends. He co-hosted “Willie Nelson’s New Year’s Eve Party” on HBO, the first concert special the network ever aired, with Kris Kristofferson and Johnny Cash. Appearing as himself and dressed in a tuxedo, the appearance gave the public a glimpse of what Jim was really like in person. But he did manage to fit in a Johnny Cash impression and could not resist mixing in a bit of Ernest before the night was over.
At 35, just as Jim was moving beyond the devastation of his divorce, he was faced with a huge setback. He lost his father, his biggest hero. Jim’s career was about to be launched into the stratosphere. But he would be without the one person whose approval and opinion he valued most.
On January 11, 1985, Jim’s father suffered a heart attack in his sleep. An ambulance rushed him and wife, Louise, to the hospital where Jim’s sisters soon arrived. After only 30 minutes, the doctor walked into the waiting room to inform the family that James Sr. had died. The death was a shock to Jim and his sisters. They were used to their mother being sick, but they always saw their father as invincible. But after his death, when looking at a picture of their parents taken months earlier, it was evident how sick their father looked. They were surprised that none of them had noticed. The family eventually discovered that James Sr. had suffered from symptoms he thought were bouts of indigestion. But they must have been signs of serious heart trouble. Instead of going to the doctor, he had treated the episodes with over-the-counter medication.
During much of his father’s visitation at the funeral home, Jim retreated to the downstairs refreshment area. It was obvious to his sisters and other family members that Jim was deeply affected by their father’s passing. They knew Jim had been drinking and were concerned about how he was going to handle the unexpected loss.
After his father’s death, Jim’s workload became even greater. But it was salve to his grief. Jim was scheduled for a two-week run performing stand-up at Maxim’s in Las Vegas beginning in mid-February. Working as his straight man was comedian-friend Mike Price. It took Jim a few performances to shake off the rust, but he was soon selling out, forcing the hotel to move him to one of their larger venues.
Las Vegas residents were familiar with Ernest thanks to commercials Jim had made for their local Channel 8 News. Although the act included an impressive array of memorable characters, a fair amount of Ernest was included. Jim spent the spring of 1985 continuing his public appearances as Ernest, even throwing out the first pitch at a Cleveland Indians baseball game. The busy commercial shooting schedule continued as post-production finished up on Dr. Otto, set for a summer release.
It was no surprise that when promotions started rolling out for “Dr. Otto,” Ernest was front and center. John Cherry attempted to capitalize on the popularity of the Ernest character while reinforcing to the public that this was the same man portraying the bizarre-looking Dr. Otto. In TV spots and posters promoting the movie, Ernest took up nearly the entire ad.
“Otto” was released independently in the Southern and Midwestern states where Ernest was already popular. Cherry planned to seek nationwide distribution if ticket sales reflected real demand for additional screens. Unfortunately, sales were disappointing. If a crowd was interested in seeing Jim in a non-Ernest role, Dr. Otto wasn’t it.
Reviews were mostly negative, and fans rushing to theaters hoping to see Jim as Ernest – or a character close to him – were disappointed. Even Lexington Herald-Leader writer Don Edwards, a friend and fan of Jim’s, couldn’t hide his poor opinion of the film. But in his review Edwards managed to praise Jim’s talent while seeming to offer professional advice: “Hollywood is missing a bet on Varney. But you can do only so much from Nashville.” Little did Edwards know that Disney was working on an Ernest movie deal that would prove that filmmaking in Nashville could compete with Hollywood. Of course, Edwards was probably imagining Jim in roles other than Ernest.
Jim was hoping that, like “Family Album,” “Dr. Otto” would demonstrate more of his range. He said at the time, “After four years, I’m too identified with Ernest. The movie is one way to break that.” Hollywood, being a business, may have focused more on the poor reception of Jim in a non-Ernest role than any potential he may have shown portraying different characters in the movie.
Looking back at the failure of “Dr. Otto,” Cherry once admitted, “Jim and I just wanted to do it, and we had our heads handed to us.” He did take some consolation in the fact that they still had videocassette rentals to help recoup some of their investment. The growing segment of the industry would prove profitable for Carden & Cherry when future Ernest films became strong rentals.
As great as the Ernest success was for Jim, he was mindful of preventing it from overtaking the acting career he desired. By filming “Family Album” and “Dr. Otto,” along with pushing his own name in Vegas, he was trying to show he wasn’t a one-trick pony. The balancing act would prove more difficult as more lucrative offers came Ernest’s way.
The Indianapolis area had become familiar with Ernest after seeing his commercials for such businesses as Roberts Dairy. Russ Dellen, a car dealer in the area, decided he wanted in on the Ernest phenomenon. The only problem was that Roberts Dairy had exclusive rights in that market. Luckily for Dellen, he was a buddy of Pete Roberts, who owned the dairy. Before long, Roy Lightner was able to convince Roberts’ Board of Directors to allow Dellen to use Ernest. He explained to them that Ernest ads for Dellen could only reinforce the tie that Roberts had with the character. After all, the two companies were not even in the same industry. Roberts’ board had no problem with it, and Ernest was soon starring in commercials for Dellen’s dealerships.
The relationship proved fortuitous. In May 1985, the annual Indy 500 Festival was held. Like every year, thousands of people descended on Indianapolis to attend the festival events leading up to the Indianapolis 500 Race. The theme of the festival was “The Wonderful World of Disney,” with cartoon icon Mickey Mouse serving as grand marshal of the celebrity car parade around the famed track. Dellen had asked Carden & Cherry if Ernest could make an appearance at the parade on behalf of his business. They obliged.
During the parade, Mickey Mouse received predictable applause as he waved to the throngs of cheering onlookers. Jim, dressed as Ernest, followed shortly behind riding atop a red convertible. As people began to recognize the blue-jean vest and khaki cap, they cheered wildly, far more than for Mickey. Ernest’s huge reception was not lost on Disney’s new CEO, Michael Eisner, and new studio head Jeffrey Katzenberg, both of whom were in the crowd. Eisner later recalled the experience: “I was at the Indianapolis 500 … and there was a parade … 500,000 people were there. The governor went by and: applause. Mickey Mouse went by: more applause. All of a sudden, Jim Varney went by (as Ernest), and 500,000 people went berserk. So I said, ‘We ought to do something about that.’ ”
Eisner quickly arranged a meeting with Cherry, who gave him a crash course on Ernest. Although Ernest had been a phenomenon for a few years, the West Coast and the Northeast were, for the most part, clueless. Disney was about to help change all that. A movie deal was eventually reached where Disney agreed to pick the films up for distribution.
Perhaps it was fate that Jim would someday work for Disney. One of the first images of Jim as a child captured by his cousins’ video camera was of him smiling big for the camera and wearing a Mickey Mouse Club cap.
As Ernest was preparing to break into movies, the commercials remained a red-hot commodity. By June 1985, around 60 companies had signed up to use Ernest in nearly 100 markets. Now, along with the greeting cards and bumper stickers, there a fan club and even a book entitled “Ernest P. Worrell Book of Knowledge.” Jim explained, “It’s not a big book. We’re not talking ‘War and Peace,’ we’re talking more like a pamphlet.”
At a time when Jim was enjoying more professional success than ever, he was dealing with more sad family news. After being diagnosed with breast cancer in 1982, oldest sister Jo Gail received a radical mastectomy and endured chemotherapy and radiation until 1983. Her cancer then went into remission, with the family praying it would not return. But a year later, Jo Gail found a node in her neck, and the news was bad. Her cancer had returned, and she would have to have more chemo.
In the fall of 1985, a fashion show cancer benefit titled “Southern Gentlemen in Style,” was held at the Kentucky governor’s mansion. It was a project of the University of Kentucky’s Phi Beta Psi sorority. Jo Gail’s battle with the disease made the event all the more personal for Jim as he served as master of ceremonies.
Despite her treatments and the family’s support, Jo’s cancer eventually spread to her lungs and brain. On March 1, 1986, at 46, she lost her brave battle with the disease. The day she died was cold and snowy, similar to the day Jim’s father had passed on the year before. Jim cancelled his appearances for two months. Losing two family members so close together was difficult for Jim and his entire family. Still dealing with the loss of his father, Jim leaned on his other two sisters for support. He began to call more often, usually late at night, to talk for hours about whatever was on his mind. Topics included current events, history, the newest jokes he had heard and his latest jewelry acquisitions. He and Jake would debate such matters as the longstanding argument over whether Shakespeare had written all of his works. He talked to Sandy about his dreams. One he referred to as “The Actor’s Dream,” where he would be standing onstage and could not remember his lines. With the increasing demands of his growing fame, he needed his family’s support more than ever.
Although Ernest was still shying away from national campaigns, he was setting his sights on a large market that Jim called, “the home of the forty-five second minute,” that is, New York City. After signing with Coca-Cola, his first international client, Ernest was set to conquer the Big Apple. The writers thought up a pitch that mocked New York’s highbrow attitude toward the rest of the country, especially when it came to rednecks like Ernest. The commercial opens with Ernest rummaging through Vern’s wine cellar, tossing dusty wine bottles over his shoulder that he believes to be old and stale. Ernest then attempts to show Vern a supposedly tastier choice as he pours Sprite into a wine glass from a two-liter plastic bottle. He takes a sip and begins describing the flavor as if he were a wine connoisseur promoting a fine merlot. The whole wine-cellar theme seemed fitting for the New York campaign and also built upon Vern’s personality from his earliest incarnation. From the beginning, John Cherry saw Vern as a tea-sipper type in the mold of snobbish characters such as Major Winchester from TV’s “M*A*S*H.”
The American Bed Co. was the second client in the New York market to advertise with Ernest. At that time, mattress companies suffered from the same problem Carden & Cherry’s dairy clients used to have when it came to advertising. Mattresses, like milk, never had that wow factor. But as the founder of The American Bed Co. put it, “Jim made them ‘rememberable.’ ”
Cherry didn’t seem too worried about Ernest’s Northeast appeal when asked if the character was sophisticated enough for New York. Cherry was well aware of how the media questioned the character’s appeal beyond the South. He joked once, “Ernest has a lot of fans in Washington, D.C. that claim to be sophisticated.”
From Time Magazine to “CNN Headline News,” Ernest’s arrival on the New York scene had everyone taking notice. CNN filmed Jim, dressed as Ernest, waving to passers-by as he stood outside Manhattan’s St. Moritz hotel. Many tourists recognized him, and one lady remarked, “He has the biggest smile from Texas.” It was always interesting to see how the local feel of the commercials led people to believe Ernest was from their hometown. How funny it was that a Kentucky actor was making a Texan feel at home in New York City.
Of all the interviews Jim granted during the years following his fame as Ernest, the most noteworthy may have been for the University of Kentucky’s student newspaper, “The Kentucky Kernel” in May 1986. The story was memorable not so much for its content but for the photo.
While being interviewed, Jim was cleaning one of his handguns and talking about his interest in them. One of the photos that accompanied the story was of him holding the gun. What added to the dark mood was the look on Jim’s face, which came off as sinister when he was actually deep in thought. Throw in the fact that his familiar khaki baseball cap was not there to cover his thick curly hair, and the picture resembled more of a “Most Wanted” poster than a newspaper article.
Another person quoted in the Kernel article was a girlfriend, Lianne Mize (now Russell), who had actually arranged the interview, as she was a friend of the reporter’s sister. Mize had met Jim in 1984 through a mutual friend, shortly after his divorce with Jacqui. The tall, dark-haired beauty in her mid-20s lived just outside of Lexington. The relationship became serious, and Jim gave her an antique pearl ring that initiated what she referred to years later as their “quasi-engagement.” Today, Russell (nee Mize) remembers how deeply affected Jim was by his father’s pa
ssing and how important family was to him.
Despite a bad break-up in May 1986, Mize remained friends with Jim for the rest of his life. Her memories of Jim include many of the same themes as other girlfriends, those where lessons on knives and watches were required. She remembers Jim smoking the Meerschaum pipes that he enjoyed collecting. These smoking pipes, made with a soft white mineral called Meerschaum, have been carved for centuries by skilled craftsmen into intricate designs such as faces, animals and a variety of motifs. One of her favorite memories relates to Jim’s love of King Arthur. He was a fan of the book “The Mists of Avalon,” a retelling of the King Arthur legend. As a result of the book, Jim became interested in the alder tree and its supposed mystical powers. One year, Mize gave Jim 100 Alder saplings as a birthday gift, and he planted them in the shape of a giant “J” on his property in White House, Tenn. The trees, like his antique knives and jewelry, provided Jim a physical link to centuries past, where he often dreamed of having lived.
Jim’s love of history led him to visit England many times. From Shakespeare’s cottage to Stonehenge, Jim enjoyed seeing historical places that he had only read about growing up. He even made a visit to the Varney ancestral home in Buckinghamshire, England, known as Claydon House. His imagination must have run wild as he walked the halls and grounds of his ancestors.
Through the years, Jim had many conversations with his sister Jake about the connection he felt to England and his belief that he had experienced past lives. He believed he had been an actor in many different generations going all the way back to the time of King Arthur. He had not necessarily been a famous actor, he thought, but had experienced both extreme poverty and great wealth. He told Jake that he felt a strong sense of déjà vu during his trips to England.