Hiding Places

by Shannon Heuston

  He looked startled. “Where is that coming from?” he wondered.

  “From the way she acts around you,” I said. “A girl doesn’t act that way unless she has a reason.”

  Will smirked. “Does it make a difference? Incidentally, Magzadoodle, there are no buses leaving Baylor on Friday afternoons. Just to make sure, I was at the bus depot when the only bus that runs on Sunday dropped off its passengers. I was going to give you a ride home.” He wagged his finger, in a manner reminiscent of how he behaved with the candidates. “You’ve been lying to me, naughty girl.”

  I stared at him in shock. I opened my mouth, hoping an explanation would slide off my tongue, but my mind was blank.

  He nodded with satisfaction at my expression. “Where were you, Magzadoodle? And where did you go all those nights during training? You didn’t sleep on campus. Did you think last Sunday was the first time I’d stopped by your room, hoping for a little something something?” His eyes were glowing with a maniacal light.

  My mind ticked through possibilities. A boyfriend that lived off campus? Then where was he right now? Would I really be having lunch with my lover in the center of town, surrounded by student apartments, if my boyfriend lived there?

  Maybe I could say we broke up. Was that believable?

  My silence was damning. Will was triumphant. He’d hit a bullseye. He knew I had something to hide. “Want to hear what I think? I think you and Ursula have something going on, which is admittedly pretty hot. About a seven on a scale from one to ten, reduced by three points since she’s a stodgy old hag. You could do better than her.”

  I found my voice. “That’s ridiculous,” I scoffed.

  He took a bite of his sandwich, chewing thoughtfully. “Naw, I don’t think so,” he said. “I’ve been watching the two of you interact, and there’s definitely tension there. Plus, she pays more attention to you than anyone else, but it’s very subtle. If you didn’t know what to look for, you probably wouldn’t notice.” He gestured at me with a potato chip. “Plus, you still haven’t told me where you were last weekend.”

  “None of your business,” I said. “We’re just having fun, right?”

  “That’s right,” he said. “And the fun’s just getting started.”

  We didn’t speak again until we were walking back to campus, the long way, past Ursula’s house. As her naked windows came into view, he spoke. “As to your question, yes. I’ve fucked Ariana. And I will continue to fuck her whenever I want, the same way I’ll fuck you whenever I want, and I won’t ask any questions about you and Dr. Reiter. That’s the trade-off.”

  I looked away from the Reiter house, hoping I wasn’t being watched.

  I was trapped.

  Chapter Twenty-Five

  Ursula

  My day off did not refresh me. I tossed and turned all night. I had an awful feeling of foreboding that chilled me down to my soul. It wasn’t just the program, or the problems with Maggie. I wondered if Papa’s long dead family had experienced the same sense of impending doom.

  Maybe I should step down. I already had the research I needed. There was no reason to go on with this farce that was destroying my peace.

  I could say Papa was sick. Dr. Heinrich wouldn’t know any different. Then I could get out of my contract without appearing unprofessional. Let someone else decide if the program was ethical or not. Maggie could quit, and we could get back on track, pretend none of it happened.

  There was sausage for breakfast. The Abdallas accepted their serving beneath Will’s watchful eye, their bent heads communicating submission. Maggie stared at the floor, unwilling to look at the family. I failed to catch her eye.

  I had mentally condemned Maggie for doing nothing to help the candidates, but what had I done to help? Nothing. Instead, I encouraged Will, egged him on, wanting to see how far he would go. As far as he was allowed. I knew that now.

  I’d reached my limit.

  “Bon Appetit!” he chortled at the Abdalla family, sliding into a seat directly across from them.

  Ahmad speared a sausage with his fork. He held it in front of his lips, gulping, trying to gather his courage. His family watched him, sorrow pooled in their large dark eyes.

  “Stop!” I said. “You don’t have to eat that. Here in the United States, you don’t have to eat food you don’t like.”

  An expression of immense relief flitted across his face. He put down his fork and wiped his mouth with a napkin. He said something to his family, and they all rose and went to the cereal station.

  Roman was smiling. Sanity had prevailed.

  Will opened his mouth to speak, then shut it. For one moment, his true personality shone forth, an angry, spiteful child glaring at me with such fury, I shivered. I took a gulp of scalding hot coffee to cover my unease.

  He was going to make me pay for this somehow. I saw it in his eyes. But what could he do? I was his boss. I had the power to fire him.

  I glanced back at him to catch him staring at Maggie. Her eyes were on her plate. She hadn’t eaten a bite.

  Odd. My first thought was he must have found out about us, but that was impossible. Unless Maggie told him. But why would she do that?

  Maggie

  Ariana was a no show for the second day in a row. Moose didn’t bother coming to breakfast. Did he think it was optional? Things were falling apart, and it was only Day Four. Thank God tomorrow was Friday. Although I was working the weekend, I’d be free of Will. I could only hope he was going home.

  Once again, Moose fell into step with us as we walked the candidates back to the dorm. Time for the torture chamber. I was so over this. What new punishment would Will conceive of today?

  As always, the candidates had to stand and recite the Pledge of Allegiance. Everyone was perfect except for Parisa. She was still flubbing the words. Will shook out some grains of rice from the box of the benevolently smiling Uncle Ben and motioned for her to kneel.

  The woman obeyed. But Will was not satisfied. Her robes provided a buffer between her knees and the rice. “Bare knees!” he commanded. “Lift your dress!”

  Parisa stared at him, not comprehending.

  Will sighed. He motioned at Sahar. “Translate,” he ordered. “She should understand me by now, she’s been learning English for hours a day.”

  Sahar explained Will’s instructions to her mother rapidly in their native tongue. Parisa gazed up at him in shock.

  He gestured impatiently at her. “Well?”

  She lifted up her robes, exposing legs knotted with puffy varicose veins and lumpy brown knees. She slowly lowered herself onto the rice. Her expression was twisted in shame. Once down on her hands and knees, her shoulders began shaking, tears trickling down her cheeks as she wept.

  Seeing her mother’s tears, Sahar also began to cry. Ahmad was deliberately looking away. Samir gazed straight ahead, refusing to look down at his wife, his posture reflecting a strange and terrible dignity.

  Roman’s hands were clenched into fists. He was glaring at Will. Maria cuddled Eduardo close, stroking his hair and whispering words of reassurance into his ear. Probably telling him that soon this nightmare would be over, and then they could go home. With time, the memory would recede, remembered as some strange vacation he took with his mama, leaving his two little sisters behind with their aunt.

  Friday.

  I awoke at dawn. My stiff, sore limbs screeched at me when I shifted position in the hard twin bed. Last night, Will held me down and forced sex on me. My cries of pain and begs for mercy just seemed to excite him.

  “Shut up,” he said, “do you want to wake everyone up?”

  He fixed his clothes and walked out of my room when he was done, letting the door slam behind him.

  Did he rape me? I wasn’t certain. I let him into my room, I knew he wanted to have sex. I could have just not answered his knock. Except Will had access to the master card to the building, like the rest of us. He could just let himself into my room and then what? What could I do about it? I
f I said no, he’d tell everyone about Ursula. She’d always said the discovery of our relationship would be a scandal in this tiny, conservative town.

  In the bathroom, there were streaks of blood on the toilet paper when I wiped.

  I didn’t know what to do. I was in uncharted waters. Telling Ursula would do no good. She would panic.

  This was my bed, and I had to lie in it.

  I stared at myself in the mirror over the sink. My face looked blasted, my eyes socketed with dark, prominent circles. I’d lost weight, just in the last few days. My round face was losing its chubbiness, becoming sharp and angular.

  I saw Maria’s reflection, coming out of one of the toilet stalls behind me. She joined me at the row of sinks. I flipped the faucet and splashed some cold water on my face.

  Maria’s room was next to mine, second to last in the chain of occupied rooms on the floor. Maybe she heard something. The walls were notoriously thin. Over the years, I’d heard the giggles and shrieks of people in the rooms around me, their voices making me feel lonely and isolated.

  When I glanced at her, I was shocked to find her gazing at me.

  Startled, I drew back, turning to leave. Maria reached out and stopped me. She shook her head sorrowfully. “Bad man,” she said with a knowing look.

  She’d heard everything.

  “Yes,” I agreed, “very bad man.”

  I was a different person only a week ago. How had everything changed so fast? In just a few short days my life had gone to hell. It was fragile.

  I didn’t know how I was going to face Will this morning. I shed my blood-stained pajamas and drew a cotton dress over my head. I would face him the same way Roman and the Abdallas did, by gritting my teeth and getting on with it, counting down the days to freedom.

  It would end for them in five weeks, I realized with slowly dawning horror, but when would it end for me?

  Will was going to be a student at Baylor this fall. Here on campus with me, holding my secret over my head the entire school year. The candidates were the lucky ones. They would be forever rid of him soon. I was stuck with him indefinitely.

  Maybe he’d be distracted by all the prettier girls returning to campus. Probably not enough.

  I willed myself not to vomit.

  Ursula

  Breakfast was tense. I’d awakened late, having caught a few hours of slumber towards morning after yet another sleepless night. I threw a few waffles into the toaster for Papa and headed to the dining hall to eat with the candidates. This morning’s offering was French toast, dusted with a generous coating of powdered sugar.

  No one spoke. I was concerned about Maggie. She looked positively haunted this morning. From the dark circles under her eyes, she wasn’t sleeping well either. I made a mental note to touch base with her later in the day. I needed to clear the air.

  This was the last day we’d eat breakfast cowering beneath the storm cloud otherwise known as Will. I planned to ask Will to come by the office after lunch. I wanted him gone by nightfall.

  He’d be blindsided. The thought made me smile. He was so confident, so smug, that it would do him good to be knocked down a peg or two.

  I stopped off in Dr. Heinrich’s office on my way to my own. He was leaving for Star Lake tomorrow for the summer, so I needed to handle this today. “I’m firing Will,” I announced without preamble.

  He looked up from his desk. “I’m rather surprised to hear that, with Lucinda quitting and Ariana vanishing,” he said. Ariana had been a no-show for three days running. We would have sounded the alarm, except her room had been cleaned out, the keys left on the desk. Dr. Heinrich had spotted her coming out of a bar downtown. She’d moved back into her sorority house.

  I wondered if Will was behind that as well. He was the gift that kept right on giving.

  “I might be able to find a couple more counselors on short notice. I’ll ask around.”

  Dr. Heinrich sighed. “I don’t understand what the problem is, Will seems more than competent. He came with great credentials, better than any of the others.”

  “He’s abusive to the candidates,” I said. “You know my family’s history. I feel like I’m watching it unfolding before my eyes. I can’t stay silent.”

  “If that’s how you feel, then I respect your decision. Even though I think you’re overreacting, I trust your judgment. Is there anything else?”

  A burden had been lifted from my shoulders. I hadn’t expected it to be quite so easy. I knew Dr. Heinrich saw himself in the athletic, charismatic young man.

  The world was suddenly a much brighter place. I’d dismiss Will, mend fences with Maggie, fix everything. Things hadn’t gone beyond the point of no return.

  Back in the sanctuary of my office, I flipped open my laptop. Then my heart stopped. I saw a ghost reflection of myself in the screen, my eyes wide and horrified, superimposed over the image.

  Parisa and Sahar Abdalla were standing in the middle of the recreation room completely naked.

  I didn’t care what was going on, it was going to end, now. The horror stopped today.

  Maggie

  Will clapped his hands. “We have something special this morning,” he announced with a grin that showed off his boyish dimples.

  I looked up from my phone, then dropped my gaze back to the screen. I didn’t want to know.

  Several boxes were assembled at the front of the room. Will opened one and withdrew a pair of jeans and a purple tube top. “Women’s clothing,” he explained.

  Roman was the only one who got the message. “You motherfucker,” he seethed.

  The rest of the candidates glanced over at him, startled, not sure what was going on. I started gnawing on my fingernails. I didn’t want to be here. God help me.

  Will pointed at him. “I’ll deal with you later,” he threatened. “But first things first. Ladies, we are going to have ourselves a little ceremony. Select some clothing from these boxes and in front of everyone, shed your robes and become Americans.”

  Samir’s forehead creased. “What is this?” he growled.

  I shut my eyes and began to rock. When the weeping began, I covered my ears.

  “If you won’t do it, fine!” Will shouted. “Tomorrow you’ll all go back to whatever desert hole you crawled out of and they’ll hang your husband and father. Or behead him. Isn’t that how they do things in that hellhole? Cut his head off before your eyes.”

  There was a murmur as Sahar translated his words for her parents. Then the wailing began.

  “Take off them robes!” Will screeched. “Now! Or back you’ll go to that shithole tonight! Your beloved Samir will be dead by Sunday! There is no place for Muslims in the U.S. of A., if you wanna stay here and be one of us, then you got to dress like us. This is a Christian nation. So, strip. Now!”

  “Dude, stop,” Roman whined. “This crosses the line.”

  “Shut the fuck up, Ching Chong,” Will snarled. “As for you, forget it. Your ass will be on the next plane to China.”

  “I’m from Korea,” Roman reminded him.

  “Wherever,” Will said.

  “Fine, fuckface.” Roman stood. “I might as well beat your ass then.”

  Moose tossed his phone aside. “You and what army?” he grunted, standing up to his full height.

  Roman began backing down. “What a bunch of pussies,” he taunted. “Can’t challenge me man to man. Gotta gang up on people instead.”

  “Your ass will be in Korea for breakfast tomorrow,” Will promised. “As for you bitches, take them clothes off now! Unless you want to see precious Samir’s head rolling on the ground!”

  Samir’s hands were balled into fists.

  With trembling hands, the women began to unwind their robes. They wore nothing beneath, which shocked me.

  Sahar dropped the last scrap of clothing and stood naked and proud. She was slender, but full through her breasts and buttocks, her skin a lovely caramel. Beside her, Parisa’s wrinkled body sagged with age, but despite her tears
, she raised her chin and met Will’s scornful gaze.

  He gave a mocking laugh. “Put some fucking clothes on.”

  Roman’s face was brick red, not with shame but anger. Maria was rocking Eduardo in her arms and singing to him under her breath in Spanish.

  Then the door to the room exploded inward and Ursula appeared on the threshold like an avenging goddess. I never loved her more than I did at that moment.

  “What is going on in here?” she screeched.

  The room froze.

  Will morphed instantly into the charming guy he’d been on day one. He grinned. “I’m just helping the women adopt more American dress. Remember, we discussed this the other day.”

  “You’re fired,” Ursula said.

  Will’s smile faded. The blood drained from his face as he stared at her in disbelief. “You can’t fire me,” he said.

  “I just did,” Ursula said. “Pack your stuff and get the hell out.” She turned to leave, then paused, catching sight of the shivering women. “You may put your robes back on.”

  “Did you hear me?” Will said. “You can’t fire me.”

  “Bye, Felicia!” Roman mocked. Will flinched.

  “Just go!” Ursula snarled.

  “I know about you and Maggie!” he screamed.

  Ursula froze. A visible pulse was throbbing in Will’s forehead. His blood pressure must have gone through the roof.

  He nodded at her shock. “Oh, yes,” he said, nodding. “What do you say now? Am I still fired?”

  “Get out!” Ursula yelled, all control lost.

  “Dr. Heinrich is going to hear about this!” he warned, flouncing off.

  “Yeah, yeah,” Roman called after his retreating back. He looked at Dr. Reiter. “Do you need us to cover something up?”

  “There will be no cover ups,” she said with resignation. She looked searchingly into my face, then sighed. “I would like everyone to go back to their rooms.”

  “No way, he’s up there,” Roman said.

  “That’s right,” Ursula said, rubbing her forehead. “Roman, will you walk everyone over to the gym? Do whatever you want over there, just don’t leave the building, and don’t be here.”