by Ancelli
Jason sat down next to her. “Can I touch you?”
“I need some time.” She pulled away.
“Baby, I only want you. Please don’t let this come between us.”
There was a knock on the door. “Come in,” Jason said, not breaking eye contact with her.
John walked in. “Are you okay?”
“I’m okay. John, I apologize for the way I acted. You know that’s not me.” She got up and walked to the door. “I have to get back to work. Please don’t follow me.” She turned and left.
Jason got up to follow her, but John held him back. “Let her go. She needs time to think. What the fuck happened? Susan ran crying to the bathroom.”
Jason shook his head. “Susan kissed me and Kay saw it. I should have listened to you, but I really thought it was harmless. I hope Kay believes me.”
“I think she believes you, that’s why she slapped Susan and not you. If she thought you were lying, you would be the one hurting right now. She loves you, man. Remember, she’s been through a lot. Now, Susan’s a problem. What if she sues us, or your wife?”
Jason stood up. “I don’t care about that right now. I’m going to go find Kay.” He rushed out of his office and stopped to look at Susan, whose red lips formed a round, tense O.
“Pack your shit and leave.” Jason headed straight to the elevator.
***
Jason walked into Kay’s office, she was typing on her keyboard looking at her computer. She looked up, and they stared at each other.
“I told you not to follow me.”
He turned, locked the door, and walked toward her desk. “Kay, please listen to me. I would never do anything to jeopardize our marriage. Please believe me, baby.”
She looked away from him. “I believe you, Jason. Do you think I would let her ruin everything we’ve worked so hard for? But I saw this shit coming, the way she looked at you.”
He strolled over to her, sat on the edge of her desk, grabbed her hand, and entwined his fingers with hers. The difference in their skin tones looked so exotic. “Are we okay?”
She looked up. “Yes, we’re okay. When I first saw her kiss you, I lost it, but when I went downstairs, the fresh air made me open my eyes. I lost it, I apologize for that, but she had it coming. She might sue me for assault.”
“Don’t apologize. And if she does, I know a great lawyer.” He said the words with a smile, then kissed her on the lips. “Keisha came out to play.” He couldn’t control his laughter at the use of his wife’s middle name: it was their moniker for the in-your-face personality she so rarely showed. “I’m sorry you didn’t get to give me your surprise.”
She stood up. “I still have one left. It’s right here.” She pointed at her lips and gave him a gentle kiss. She started shaking, pulling away. “Baby, I love you. You’re all mine.”
He grabbed her waist. “Yes, ma’am. I’m all yours, now and forever. Are you sure we’re okay?” He stared at her. “You’re shaking.”
“I’m sure. I just got a chill.”
He pulled her closer. She gently moved away, a bit tense. He grabbed her hand back. “Woman, you’re incredible.” He walked her backward to her black couch in the corner, and straddled her. “Happy birthday to me.”
He leaned back. “Let’s go home.” He said trying to get up, but she wouldn’t let him.
“I can’t. I have an appointment in about ten minutes.”
Her assistant buzzed. She got up and walked toward her desk while straightening her skirt suit. “Yes, Miriam?”
“Your two o’clock appointment is here.”
“Okay I’ll be out in a second.” Saved by the bell.
Jason walked over to her. “I can’t go out there looking like this.” He pointed at his erection.
“I’ll help you with that later.” She gave him a peck on his lips and winked at him. He watched the way her ass swayed as she went toward the door. “I’ll see you later, birthday boy.”
He followed behind her and she kissed him on his cheek goodbye, before stopping in front of her client.
“Good afternoon, Mr. Finch. How are you today?” She shook his hand and led him to her office. Turning, she looked back at Jason and mouthed. “Bye”.
He got in the elevator and thanked God for his wife’s understanding. Now he had to go back to his office and confront Susan.
***
Later that evening, Jason met Kay, Angel, his parents, John and Amy at the Columbian Cuisine restaurant. When he arrived the hostess walked him over to the private room where his family and friends were waiting for him.
When he walked in Angel smiled and yelled, “Happy birthday Daddy,” and ran to him.
He bent down, hugged and kissed her. She held his hand, led him to his chair next to Kay. He sat down and kissed his wife on her forehead, as she tilted her head to the side and whispered. “Happy birthday,” and gave him a peck on the lips. He smiled and said hi to everyone. Everyone ordered. They talked about family and work. After a while John talked about how excited he was about having a baby, and rubbed Amy’s big stomach. A few minutes later the food arrived. Jason didn’t talk much knowing what Kay and he had gone through earlier that day. He remembered the look on Susan’s face. She’d apologized, then seen the look on his face and immediately started packing. He’d gone into his office and called the HR department, just in case. He did feel sorry for her. She’d been one of the best secretaries he’d had in years, but he had to let her go. Kay, squeezing his thigh, made him came back to reality.
She said with a smile, “It’s time for cake.” The waitress came in with a cake covered with candles, and they all sang. He blew out the candles and made a wish.
“Daddy, gifts,” Angel said.
He smiled at her. “What gifts?” He looked at Kay.
“Daddy, Daddy open mine.” His little one got up on her chair, leaned on the table, got her present and handed it to Jason. “Here, Daddy.” She kissed him on the cheek. He opened her wrapped gift. “Do you like it, Daddy?” He smiled when he finally saw what it was.
“I love it, sweetheart.” It was a picture she’d drawn of the four of them, Kay, Angel, the baby, and him, along with a bracelet she’d made that said Number One Daddy. He pulled the picture and the bracelet up and showed the others. He asked Angel to help him put on the bracelet.
His mother asked. “Can I see that picture again?”
He handed the picture to his mom. “Who’s that baby in the picture, Angel?”
“My baby. Mommy and Daddy said I’m going to be big sister,” Angel answered.
Everyone looked at Jason and Kay. They hadn’t told anyone except Angel. She’d kept their secret until now.
“Well,” his father said.
“We’re having a baby,” Kay confirmed, excited.
They all smiled and said congratulations. His mom jumped out of her seat, kissed and hugged them both. “I’m so excited—another grandbaby.” She sat back down and hugged her husband. “This is wonderful. Christmas in July.”
John handed him a white envelope. It was three VIP tickets to a football game. “Thanks, guys.” His parents handed him a big, brown envelope. Inside was a gold picture frame of his grandfather and him when he was a baby. It brought tears to his eyes. He walked over to his parents and kissed them. Coughing, he walked back to his seat, sat down and ate his piece of cake. Kay cleared her throat.
“I have something for you, too.” She picked up a gift bag and handed it to him.
He smiled and kissed her lips. Oh, how he missed her soft lips. “You didn’t have to.”
“Yes I did! What kind of a wifey would I be?” she smiled.
He looked into the bag and pulled out a box, opened it and was surprised. It was a gold Rolex with his initials engraved on it. He hugged her and whispered in her ear. “This is too much, Kay.”
Smiling, she said, “For the man I love, nothing is too much. I had to work a lot of overtime.”
“I’ll show you how thankf
ul I am later.” He kissed her on the lips.
Chapter Seven
Two months later
Jason turned in bed, feeling for Kay’s warm body, but once again he’d woken up alone. He wondered if she’d even come to bed last night. Ever since Kay had been attacked they hadn’t had sex. He understood she needed time, but he needed his wife. He got up, went to the bathroom, and did his morning ritual. Walking out of their bedroom, he came into the living room to find Kay sleeping on the sofa. Her baby bump was beginning to show. He stared at her and thought why are you out here? He turned when he felt tiny fingers pulling on his T-shirt, he smiled down at Angel and picked her up.
“Good morning, Daddy.” She chuckled and kissed him on the cheek.
“Good morning, sweetie. Are you hungry?”
“Yes, Daddy. Can I have chocolate pancakes, please?”
“Okay,” Jason said, putting her down on the floor. She always knew how to make him say yes. “Are you going to help me make them?”
She followed him into the kitchen. “Yes, Daddy.”
They started cooking the pancakes and singing.
When Kay woke up, she went to the bathroom and then walked toward the kitchen. She smiled when she saw her baby and her husband working together making breakfast. She kept quiet for a while enjoying watching the two most important people in her life.
“Good morning.”
Angel looked up. “Good morning, Mommy. Daddy’s letting me put chocolate in the pancakes.”
Jason looked up at Kay, slightly disappointed, then looked away.
“Can I help?” She walked over to the stove and stared at Jason.
Jason moved and answered. “No, we’re done, but you can eat breakfast with us if you’re not too busy.”
She stared at him a bit confused. “I’m never too busy for you guys.”
He walked out of the kitchen with Angel behind him. “You could’ve fooled me.”
She followed. “What’s that suppose to mean?”
He stared at her. “Nothing, Kay. Let’s sit and eat breakfast.”
She kept quiet for now. She smiled at Angel. “Thank you, sweetie. You did such a great job.”
Angel smiled. “You’re welcome, Mommy.”
They started eating and enjoying their chocolate pancakes with orange juice. Angel kept talking about how much fun she had at the park with her grandma. She had chocolate all over her face, and Jason wiped it up with a napkin.
“Miss Angel, Uncle John and Amy want to take you to the zoo with Johnny. Would you like to go with them?”
“Yeah. I love baby Johnny.”
On Saturdays, they usually spent the day together doing family stuff, like going to the park, the zoo, a museum, or anything they could do together, but today Jason did not feel like going out. He just wanted to stay home and rest.
Kay was clearing the table. She looked at Angel. “Sweetie, you can go to your room and play. I’ll come and help you get dressed.”
Angel ran out of the dining room. Jason stood up to leave when Kay turned to him. “Please wait. We need to talk.” She walked over to him. “What’s wrong? Where is this hostility toward me coming from?”
He stopped and stared at her. “I’m just tired of waking up alone, Kay.”
She took his hand. “I’m sorry. I fell asleep working last night. I have a big project due in a couple of days. There is nothing wrong with me.”
“Kay, that’s always your excuse. You need to come up with a new one. You do remember you have a husband?” He kissed her on the cheek and left the room.
***
Kay closed the door and walked to the backyard, where Jason was swimming in the pool they’d added about a year before. She sat down on the lounge chair and stared at him, admiring his beautiful lean muscular body, his biceps, abs and legs. She felt herself starting to get moist. She missed making love to him, but every time she got an urge, she remembered the way that asshole had touched her and she would just pull away and freeze. No, he hadn’t raped her, but the memory of his hands all over her drove her insane. She knew if she didn’t deal with her issues Jason would find someone who would be more than willing to supply his needs, someone like Susan or Carla. I need to deal with this before it tears my marriage apart.
Jason swam to the edge of the pool and looked up at her. “Join me.” He extended his hands.
Kay looked down at him. “I don’t have on a swim suit.”
“Take off your dress. Angel is not home,” he said, pleading with his eyes.
She stood up, pulled the dress over her head, left her bra and panties on and walked to the side of the pool where Jason was waiting for her. She sat down and helped her into the pool. He grabbed her.
“Relax.” He rubbed her stomach.
She looked into his baby blues. “What do you think we’re having?”
“Do you want the politically correct answer, or my honest answer?”
She smiled. “Be honest.”
He pulled her closer. “I want another girl that looks just like you with your beautiful brown skin.” He kissed her nose.
“Well, I think we’re having a boy. He is going to look like you.” She wiped the water off his brows. “Angel already favors me.”
His hands tightened around her waist and he whispered, “I’ve missed you,” followed by a series of fluttery kisses. She opened for him, the kiss got deeper. He touched her, but she pulled away from him.
All the memories flashed back from her attack.
He grabbed her wrist. “Don’t do this, Kay. Talk to me.”
She pulled away, got out of the pool and picked her dress up from the floor, but before she walked into the house, he yelled.
“Kay, don’t walk away from me.”
She went to their bedroom, taking off her underwear on the way to the bathroom. She turned on the shower and jumped in. I’m going to lose him.
***
Half an hour later Jason walked into the bedroom where Kay was sleeping. She looked so peaceful. Pregnancy brought out more beauty in her, if that were even possible. He walked into the bathroom and jumped into the shower. He needed a cold shower. He remembered the last time they made love. The memory got him hard, and he grabbed his dick and stroked it, slow, and then fast, the orgasm hit him hard and fast. He stepped out the shower, put on boxers and sweatpants and walked over to the bed and lay down beside her. He wiped her tears, kissed her on her forehead and wrapped his arms around her chest and stomach. She felt so soft. He missed touching and making love to her. “Talk to me, Kay. We can get through anything together.”
“I know we can. I’m just afraid you won’t understand. You’ll eventually leave me.”
“I will never leave you, Kay,” he whispered in her ear. “You can always count on me, baby.”
“I know I can count on you.”
“Then talk to me.” He turned her face to face him.
“I still have nightmares about that day. I can’t even pump gas without having a breakdown. I’m always nervous, even at the grocery store,” she paused. “Every time you touch me intimately, I feel his hands all over me.” She stopped looking at him. “On your birthday at my office you didn’t notice, but I was shaking like a leaf. I wanted you so bad, but the memories just kept coming. He’s still out there. I’m constantly looking over my shoulder.”
“Baby, look at me.” She stared into his eyes. “Why didn’t you tell me? We could’ve dealt with it. We can go see a therapist, baby, all you had to do is talk to me. You can always depend on me.”
“I don’t want to see a therapist. I just need to feel you, not him,” she pleaded. “I want you to make love to me, make me forget.”
He caressed her cheeks, wiping away her tears. “I love you, Kay. I will do anything you want me to, but I think we need to go see a therapist. I don’t think making love is going to fix this. Let’s start slow. Let me hold you.”
***
Mrs. Brenda Reese was a tall African-American woman who’
d been recommended to them by Kay’s doctor. Kay watched as Mrs. Reese called Jason into her office and asked him to sit next to Kay.
She offered a gentle smile with her next words. “Kay, why don’t you share with Jason what you just told me?”
Kay was quite for a second, she took a deep breath closing her eyes and started telling what happened during her attack and what she was feeling, her sense of guilt, shame, nightmares and how she tried to handle it on her own, but she finally realized that she needed help. Kay looked over at Jason and told him, how she felt it was her fault, she was afraid that he would leave her. She said that the pregnancy helped her, when she felt down, she thought of what she had and would pull forward.
While she was talking, Jason tried not to show emotions, he just held her hand. He remembered what Mrs. Reese told him try to keep your feelings about the rape to a minimal, don’t show aggressiveness and you need to allow your words and answers to be addressed as gently as possible. Your job for the time being is to be a wonderful listener, the recovery process might be short or long, it’s up to Kay, because everyone handles situations differently. She needs to feel protected and secure. He told Mrs. Reese how he felt, the anger, rage and the shame of not been there to protect her. The therapist explained to him that it wasn’t his fault. She told him they would come out stronger than they started.
He whispered in her ear. “Kay I love you. I’m always here for you no matter what. It wasn’t your fault.”
She squeezed his hand, and stopped talking, turned and looked at him. “I know. You’ve never let me down. It wasn’t your fault either.”
During the next couple sessions Kay and Jason dealt with what happened to her. She learned to open up to Jason again and tell him everything she was feeling. She also opened up about the abuse she suffered at Tommy’s hands, even though it happened once, it had scared her. The nightmares were gone and she finally allowed Jason to hold her, kiss her without feeling sick, or guilty. She was finally starting to be normal again. She took control of her life, and her attacker wouldn’t win.