by J. S. Lee
Although my interests lay purely in the guys of Onyx, I couldn’t help but marvel at how many attractive men there were at Atlantis. It made sense considering part of the requirements of an idol’s job revolved around looks as much as it did pure talent (which I didn’t doubt any of these guys had).
By the end of the shoot, I had hundreds of photographs to work with. We thanked each other and congratulated each other, and then we started to pack up. My things all went back into my bag, and I was done. At least for this part of the shoot. Now I had hours’ worth of post shoot touch ups.
Despite dying my hair, I spent the week locked in my bedroom. In the daytime, when Xiao and MinMin were either at whatever practice or physio session had been scheduled, I was working through the photographs.
During the night, when they had successfully sneaked out of their dorms (fans were now aware of the move), and into our home, our time was spent with each other. Yes, there was a lot of sex involved, but sometimes it was as chilled as watching a movie.
I couldn’t wait to have everyone move in.
On the following Tuesday, with a flash drive full of photographs, I took the car into Atlantis to drop the hard copy off with the marketing team. They’d already had digital copies uploaded to their media server, but a cryptic message from Youngbin beckoning me to meet him there had me needing an excuse to go in.
Once the drive was handed off to a confused marketeer, I pulled out my phone and quickly typed a message to Youngbin. Where are you?
Youngbin: Recording studio 3 on the eighteenth floor.
Getting to the floor was easy enough, but the corridor for the recording studios had a lock which needed a special pass that I didn’t have. I didn’t have to wait long for Youngbin to appear and as soon as I did, his eyes went wide. “You’re not blonde.”
I nodded. “I needed to fix my roots, but this seemed like a good disguise for a while, not that I’ve tried it out yet to see how it works.”
Youngbin reached over, tugging at a thick lock of my hair, twisting it around his fingers. “You look pretty with dark hair.” He glanced up, and suddenly dropped the hair.
I followed his gaze, spotting the camera. “Am I going to get in trouble for being here? Am I going to get you in trouble for being here?”
“I wouldn’t care if you got me in trouble,” Youngbin informed me. He pulled a key card out of his pocket and pressed it against the sensor. The lock bleeped and then flashed green. Before I could get him to answer the other half of the question, he had grabbed my hand and pulled me through the door, allowing it to close behind us.
“There’s no CCTV down here.” He caught me looking up at the ceilings.
“Your message was vague,” I told him as I followed him to the third door in the corridor. Youngbin held it open for me and I walked in, instantly forgetting everything as I stared at all the equipment. It was just like the recording studios I had seen on television, but smaller. The room was split in two with a desk full of sliders sitting in front of a glass window, looking in at a second empty room aside from a single mic. “How do groups fit in there?”
“Atlantis has bigger studios, but this is mostly to capture a single voice. Maybe two.”
“Huh,” I muttered, continuing my look around the room.
“You isolate voices when each part is recorded separately, so you can emphasize them where needed,” Youngbin explained. He moved to the other side of the small room where a second desk had been set up with an iMac on top of it, and then he sat down in a revolving desk chair. I recognized the program on it for creating music as one Youngbin had used while on tour.
“What are you working on?” I asked, curious.
Youngbin held out a hand and I took it. He pulled me to him so that I was straddling him. “I’ve missed you,” he told me, his warm hands moving to cup both of my cheeks. “A lot changes in a week,” he added, nodding to my hair.
“I’ve missed you too.”
A thumb slid across my face, tracing along my lower lip. I shifted my weight, intentionally, and found him quickly growing hard beneath me. The action had him leaning back in the chair, groaning. I wrapped my mouth around his thumb and swirled my tongue around it.
As quick as a shot, Youngbin leaned forward and pulled his thumb from my mouth, replacing it with his tongue. His kiss was fevered and hungry, making me feel missed, wanted, and just as desperate as he seemed to be.
My hands fell to his shoulders, half rubbing, half massaging them as I ground against him.
Suddenly, he had picked me up, swapping positions with me, before he leaped away from me. There was a brief moment of confusion before I realized he was locking the door. When he turned back to me, somehow the heat in his eyes had intensified.
He walked back to me taking measured steps, then, placing one hand on either arm as he kneed my legs apart to stand between them, he leaned forward. I tilted my head, but his diverted to my ear. “I have a surprise for you,” he told me.
Then, he leaned behind me, clicking something on the computer behind me. A smooth RnB beat started playing and moments later, Youngbin’s voice filled the room. The Youngbin in front of me, while keeping his hands where they were, moved his body back from mine so he could fix his gaze on me.
At first I thought it was Onyx’s next track, but the sound was completely different to normal. Not that it would have been a problem for them to mix it up, but the lyrics sounded innocent yet they suggested something hot and filthy and not age appropriate.
Every moment I’m away from you I die a little.
Every moment we’re together, there’s a little death.
Being with them should upset me but it brings us closer.
You, me, we.
We’re gonna make it.
Hard, slow, together.
We’re gonna live it.
A little death, a happy ending, we hit the spot.
The whole thing was a freaking list of euphamisms for sex. And our current situation. And just as I was getting turned on as much as I was wanting to tell him he couldn’t release it, the bridge kicked in and suddenly it was my voice filling the studio.
And by voice, I mean orgasm.
Panting, moaning, whimpers. Me and all the noises I made.
In stereo.
While Youngbin stared down at me with his cock saluting me.
“That’s me,” I told him. “That’s me having an orgasm.”
Youngbin slowly shook his head. “That’s you close to having an orgasm.”
I slowly licked my lips, processing this. It was, strangely, hot as hell; imagining Youngbin sat in front of his computer, putting this together, listing to me time and time again. “And what do you plan on doing with it?” I asked, my question sounding breathy.
Youngbin’s eyes didn’t leave mine. “That depends on you.”
“Do you want to release it as a single?”
“Not officially, because Atlantis will never allow it. But I would like to put it out as a Mixtape.”
My cheeks were burning. The idea of so many people – and Onyx had a large fanbase – listening to me was…
Fuck, it was exhilarating.
I was, apparently, a bit of an exhibitionist.
“Do the others know?”
Youngbin tilted his head, a wicked grin teasing at his lips as he realized what I was saying. “They will.”
“Can you share it with them when we’re all together?” An eyebrow arched upwards. “I’m curious as to whether or not they’ll know it’s me.”
“Oh, they’ll know,” he assured me leaning in. “They will absolutely know.” And then there was a moment of doubt. “But do you like it?”
“Like it?” I repeated. “Hell, I want a live version.”
Youngbin’s eyes closed as he leaned his forehead against mine. “I have a VIP showing starting now.”
The line was both corny and hot.
I tilted my head upwards, quickly capturing Youngbin’s lower lip between my teet
h. “Oh fuck,” he groaned, before kissing me. The song ended but quickly kicked in again on repeat. As it did, I reached inside his pants, earning myself another groan in my mouth as I wrapped my hand around his cock.
I decided then that today, this VIP performance was going to be a duet.
I let go and stood, bringing Youngbin back with me, then while kissing him, my hand still wrapped around him, I led him backwards to the mixing desk. He seemed happy enough to let me take charge, until I stepped back and stripped down to my underwear.
Knowing this was the first time I had seen Youngbin alone for a while, I had put on a black silk thong and a matching bra. Or almost matching, seeing as certain parts of the bra were sheer. And then I’d hidden them under a pair of jeans and a thin sweater.
Youngbin stared at me, rubbing one hand over his jaw, while the other went to his crotch. “Kate,” he muttered, his voice raspy.
Keeping my gaze locked on his, I lowered myself to my knees, unbuckled his pants and tugged them down, allowing his cock to spring free. As his pants dropped to the floor, I was occupied with taking him in my mouth. Beside him, his knuckles whitened as he clutched at the edge of the mixing desk.
I ignored the heated ache between my legs that seemed to pulse in time with Youngbin’s moans, competing with my own – both from me as I worked my tongue up and down his length and around the tip of his cock, already leaking pre-cum, and from the sound of his track in the background. Fuck, that was hotter than I imagined it to be.
Hands gripped my shoulder, nails pulling me upwards. “You’re going to make me cum.”
“That’s my intention,” I shrugged.
“No, that’s my intention,” he corrected me. He picked me up swinging us around so that it was me sat on the mixing desk. “You think you can drown out your backing track?”
I gave him an innocent look. “Doesn’t that depend on you?”
“Oh, challenge accepted,” he muttered, shooting me a dangerous look before marching back to his computer. He turned the volume up a couple of notches. Then, with a look of determination, strode back to me.
In a slow, and almost painful movement, he pulled my thong off, letting it drop to the floor, then, a hand wrapped around each ankle as they were placed on the mixing desk, spreading my legs.
He gave me another mischievous smile, and then walked back to the computer once more. “Wrong kind of moan,” I pouted at him.
Until he put his hand on the back of the chair and started rolling it back towards me.
This was a man who meant business.
He sat down in front of me. Using a single finger, he traced a line up me, smirking at the slickness he was greeted by.
I shivered in anticipation. A moan escaped me almost as soon as his tongue replaced the finger, running the length of me until it found the already throbbing bundle of nerves.
Like I was part of the mixing desk and he had a job to do, trying to find the right balance and volume of sounds that he needed from me, Youngbin met his challenge, and my moans and cries quickly drowned out my recorded versions. Then when he had me right on edge of an orgasm, he stood so that he could slide his cock into me.
“The live version is much better,” he told me, thrusting in and out of me.
I had to agree.
I wasn’t sure who came first, other than the me on the mixtape track. “I love you, Kim Youngbin,” I told him, wrapping my arms around him as he helped me off the mixing desk. “But for the record, mixing desks are not the most comfortable things to sit on.”
Youngbin’s hands slid down and around to my butt cheeks, and he started massaging them as I leaned into his shoulder. “I love you too,” he murmured.
제 8 장
B-Day
A full week went by before I was able to find out how well the hair dye had worked. CX had moved in and it had taken a few days to get past the weirdness he had.
It was also because of CX that I had to put the hair dye to the test.
April 1 was CX’s birthday and there was no way I was letting that one go by without finding something for him. I spent every available minute trying to scour the internet for gift suggestions, which was difficult when he was frequently in the room with us, especially when MinMin was around.
In the end, I had asked MinMin to distract him for a few hours while I went out. Under the pretense of wanting to watch an episode of Game of Thrones – CX’s favorite show, MinMin dragged him into his room and I made my escape.
Despite three members of Onyx coming and going, no one had worked it out. MinMin had explained that every morning, once they were picked up by Taeyoon, they were driven into the parking lot of the new dorms. When they left a short while later, either by themselves or with more members, they would always make a show of winding down the window to wave at any fan that was waiting for them.
The same happened on the way back in when they would drop the other members off and then sneak back out in an ‘empty’ vehicle, before Taeyoon would drive them back to the house.
It was elaborate and excessive, but with things finally dying down, no one was eager to drop the ruse.
To give him his credit, Taeyoon did it every day. And usually without comment. It wasn’t going to be a permanent thing of just him doing it. Everyone was still certain Sungmin was returning as Onyx’s manager and when he did, they would share duties.
I was going to buy a small thank you present for Taeyoon while I was out too.
It was a reasonable walk to the nearest subway station, but I had never travelled alone around Seoul before and I didn’t feel confident in taking the bus. At least with the subway, it had to stop at every stop, unlike the bus.
I’d put on a mask – there was dust in the air, anyway – and pulled a cap over my head, and no one gave me a second look, other than the general once over I usually got, acknowledging I wasn’t Asian.
By the time I reached the mall, I was feeling confident.
For the first couple of hours.
Then it was because I couldn’t find anything for CX. He was a hard person to buy for. Aside from his obsession with Game of Thrones, he didn’t watch much television, and he already had three different versions of the GoT sets.
Books? He liked reading. Of course, he had all the books George R.R. Martin had released so far in the ‘A Song of Fire and Ice’ series. And I didn’t have enough sway, money, or superpowers to get the man to finish the next book.
I wandered up and down the mall, looking for inspiration. I was making it harder than I needed to; CX would be happy with most things I bought him. The thing was, I wanted to get him something that I knew he couldn’t get himself.
Dejected, I bought myself a bottle of water and sat down on a bench, glowering at the store opposite. It took a good ten minutes of staring through it rather than at it, to discover it wasn’t a store, but the library I had taken him to for an impromptu photo shoot the first time – well, second if you included the initial introduction from Holly – I had met him.
With an idea in my head, I crossed the street and went in.
Most of CX’s birthday was spent alone. He had a birthday fan meeting, and everyone had unanimously agreed I shouldn’t be there for it. Yes, I was a photographer, but I was currently their tour photographer.
Further fan service was required of him after that, even though I know he did it happily and willingly. Social media content for those who couldn’t make it.
By the time he arrived back at the house, it was late. Xiao came in first diving onto the couch opposite after he had greeted me with a kiss and a slice of cake. “You know it’s CX’s birthday, right?”
“I was given a lot of cake,” CX replied for him as he and MinMin walked in carrying an untouched cake each.
My eyes widened at the sight of them. Both were huge and had little CX figurines on them. They were the kind of cakes you would watch some confectioner decorate in a Facebook video and then wonder how anyone dare to eat it and ruin what was essen
tially art – which was exactly what I was doing now.
I glanced down at the slice in my hand. “Please tell me you didn’t hack at something like that for this?”
Xiao raised his head and shot me a look of disbelief. “Are you serious? It’s cake.”
Taking care with the one he was already holding, MinMin took the second cake from CX and carried them into the kitchen while CX came and sat down beside me. “It’s OK. This was a much less extravagant cake.”
From the other couch, Xiao stretched, the motion pulling up the bottom of his shirt and giving me a sneaky peak at his defined v-line. Catching me grinning, he pulled off his shirt and threw it at me as he stood. “I’m going to work out for a while. I ate too much cake.” He disappeared towards the gym.
“Did you get lots of presents?” I asked CX.
“So many,” he nodded. “I can’t believe how many there were. I haven’t even had chance to open many of them yet. They’ve come from all around the world.”
“I have something for you.” I told him. I set the cake down on the arm of the couch and leaned around to get the bag I had stashed there.
Eyes bright with anticipation, CX took it off me. “I love it.”
“Wonderful,” I grinned. “I hope you like what’s in it too.”
“What’s that?” MinMin asked from the doorway.
CX shrugged. “I haven’t opened it yet.”
“So open it.”
CX pulled the bag open, then he paused, shooting me a suspicious look. “Is this something I can open in front of others?”
“At this point, is there anything you wouldn’t show to the others?” I responded. I reached for the cake and took a bite while CX pulled the present out.
MinMin sat down next to him, watching as CX carefully peeled the striped paper off. “Astronomy?”
CX worked it out immediately. “This is the book.”
“What book?” MinMin demanded, peering over his shoulder.
“How did you remember this?” CX asked, staring at me in surprise.