by Anne Hampson
‘His family moved here about eighteen months ago. They farm Wide Acres, a few miles south of Doug’s place. He was supposed to be engaged to a girl in Pretoria, where they came from, but no one ever saw her, so it might have been only a rumour, or she might have decided she didn’t want to bury herself out here. Neil didn’t bother with anyone until recently and then he seemed to take a fancy to Rosa—’ Alex broke off and corrected himself. ‘I rather think that it’s Rosa who’s become interested in him. She’s a bit of a flirt, I’m thinking, but Chad’ll soon put a stop to that when they’re married. He’s not the sort of fellow to stand any nonsense from anyone, least of all his wife.’
Chad and Jo came back at that moment, saving Beth from commenting on what Alex had said. Chad took the glass from Beth’s hand, placed it on the table and then pulled her up.
‘Let’s dance now that you’ve had a good rest,’ he said, and without giving her the chance to say yes or no he had her on the floor and she was dancing on air, thrilling to the feel of his arm at her back, of his body close, his cheek almost touching hers. She could feel his cool breath on her face, smell the pine-scent of his after-shave lotion.
‘Happy?’ he said briefly and unexpectedly.
‘Very.’
‘You look it. Are you hungry?’ he added when she did not speak.
‘Famished,’ she answered with a laugh. ‘We didn’t stop for a proper lunch today because we wanted to get the lawn cleared.’
‘Which you did, and more besides.’
‘We were surprised at what we’d managed to do,’ she confessed.
‘It’s the buffet after this dance, so you’ll be able to make up for what you’ve missed.’
‘It’s early tonight.’
‘It was late when you arrived,’ he reminded her. ‘What kept you all?’
‘I don’t know. Perhaps we took longer getting ready.’
‘It was worth it; you look ravishing.’
‘I’ve already told you once tonight—flattery will get you nowhere.’
He leant back to quirk her a smile.
‘If I wanted to get anywhere,’ he said suavely, ‘I’d not need to resort to flattery.’
‘Oh!’ She coloured with embarrassment. ‘How arrogantly confident can you get!’
‘You’ve seen nothing yet, my dear,’ he assured her, swinging her from the centre of the ballroom to the side. And then they were on the verandah ... and Beth was acutely conscious of Rosa’s eyes following them. Darkness was before them and the lights behind. Beth said, because she was trembling and unsure of herself, her mind in chaos as she decided one moment that Chad was in love with her and the next that he was merely playing a prolonged game which he apparently enjoyed,
‘Just look at the poor bougainvillaea, torn away from the pillars—and that canary palm that we liked so much. It’s broken. What a tremendous amount of damage the storm did!’
He said nothing and she looked at him, up into his face to try desperately to read what she wanted to see. But she met only an enigmatic countenance, with alert blue eyes that refused to respond to the smile she produced in hers.
Chad’s arm slid around her and he pulled her to the end of the verandah, where it was darker and more private. She could not help thinking that his action was deliberate, because he knew that Rosa was watching. Dejection fought with hope and both emotions were persistently troublesome.
‘Let’s go back, Chad,’ she pleaded. ‘I don’t want to stay out here.’
‘Why not? It’s cool and fresh. You can smell the tang of cleanness after the rain, the earthy smell that you always get when the dust has been laid.’
She shook her head. She felt sure now that he was only playing with her, using her to make Rosa jealous. None of it made much sense, she had to admit, but of one thing she was sure: if Chad loved her, Beth, he wouldn’t be dallying like this; he would have asked her to marry him—No, not asked, but told her she was going to marry him, and soon!
That was his way—domineering and dictatorial and arrogantly masterful.
‘I want to go in.’ Her voice had a petulant ring, which caught his attention. He looked down at her in some perplexity and asked what was wrong. ‘Nothing,’ she snapped. ‘Why do you have to have an inquest simply because I don’t want to stay out here?’
‘Hello ... we’re in for a fight again, are we?’ He actually gave her a playful shake that had the effect of making her temper flare. ‘Beth, you’re a damned perverse creature if ever there was one!’
‘In that case,’ she shot at him, ‘why are you so keen to be out here with me? In fact, why do you bother with me at all?’
‘Because, as you already know, I made that promise to your uncle. However, there are other reasons—’
‘Did you promise my uncle you’d kiss me, and beat me, and shake me at every opportunity?’ she flashed, cutting into his words so that the last part of what he was saying escaped her altogether. ‘He’d be horrified if he knew how cruelly you’ve treated me!’
‘Cruelly?’ he echoed with a lift of his brows which was the prelude to laughter. ‘Don’t exaggerate,’ he admonished. ‘If I did decide to be cruel you’d be nursing bruises for a month.’ So calm his voice, and quiet. Beth glanced at him frowningly and wondered if he really meant it.
‘I can’t believe you ever adopt this attitude towards Rosa—’ Beth stopped, horrified that such words had escaped unbidden. She had voiced her private thoughts without the slightest intention of doing so. Chad laughed again and said,
‘Rosa never provokes me in the way you do, Beth, and so she never earns herself any reprisals.’
‘All I can say,’ responded Beth tartly, ‘is that she must be very dull!’ Again she tried to catch herself up and failed. What on earth was the matter with her, coming out with things like this? Chad would not care for disparaging remarks to be made about the girl he was probably intending to marry.
But to Beth’s astonishment he replied calmly, ‘Compared with you, she is dull.’ And then he added, after assuring himself that Beth had nothing to say to this, ‘But you’re much more enlivening than most women—than any other woman I’ve ever met, in fact.’
‘I’m glad I’m different!’
‘So am I.’
‘You ...?’ She shook her head bewilderedly. ‘I shall never understand you,’ she said in tones of sulky complaint.
‘Oh, I don’t know,’ was his casual rejoinder. ‘If at first you don’t succeed ... You know the rest.’
She drew a breath and said with some asperity,
‘It seems to me that you enjoy being an enigma!’
‘I certainly enjoy riling you like this. It’s so easy, you see.’
‘I detest you!’ she seethed. ‘Take me back in there!’
‘When I’m ready.’ His voice retained its calm quality, but Beth knew him well enough by now to be sure that her last words had aroused his temper. ‘It so happens that I’m not ready at the moment.’
He was fully alert when she started away; her wrist was caught in a painful grip that brought the tears to her eyes. She was tensed up, nerve-ends all awry. Chad’s behaviour was infuriating because his manner was one of proprietorial arrogance, as if he considered he had some authority over her. How she could have let herself fall in love with him she did not know. To be married to him would be sheer hell! Already she had told herself that a marriage would not last twelve months. She would rather say it would not last one month!
‘You might not be ready,’ she flashed, ‘but I am! I’m going back, no matter what you say!’
The words were scarcely out when he gave a sudden jerk that twisted her round and for one horrified moment she thought he was going to beat her again, right here, on the verandah, where anyone could see if they were to come out of the ballroom and stroll along to the end. But he had no such intention. She was brought up against his muscled frame—no, crushed against it, crushed until she felt every bone in her body was broken. She turned her face in
to her shoulder, determined not to let him kiss her. Alas for her efforts! She felt his hand beneath her chin, then his fingers gripping it as she attempted to twist away again. Her face was jerked up, but at the same time she managed to release one of the arms that were pinioned to her sides and she caught him a blow across his cheek.
But no sooner was the deed done than she regretted it, fully aware that she should have known better. Chad’s anger was released in an action that brought her head right back as he took a fistful of her hair and tugged it mercilessly, bending his head at the same time to take possession of her lips. The savage force brought her lips apart; his mouth on hers was sensuous, firing her with a desire that was as hateful as it was ecstatic. His lips kept hers apart even though she was fighting to close them. His arrogant domination was reducing her to surrender as it awakened her own passions and desires. She struggled, but feebly, and she hated his slow triumphant laugh when for a moment he leant away so that he could look at her. But there was very little light, and she was glad, for she knew without any doubt at all that he would find her eyes dreamy with desire for him, her bruised mouth quivering ... as if pleading for more. Her cheeks were hot, the result of her thoughts and her admissions.
‘If you’ve quite finished,’ she managed to say in tones of steel, ‘perhaps we can return to the ballroom.’
‘Careful, girl,’ he warned. ‘I could do more than kiss you, you know.’
‘Don’t be ridiculous!’ Beth put a finger to her burning mouth. It was swollen and hurting and suddenly she started to cry. Nerves, she thought, despising herself for her weakness. ‘I hate you, Chad Barret! I’m going to write to Uncle Jack and tell him how you’ve treated me! He thinks you’re marvellous, but he’s going to learn otherwise! I’m going to let him know just how rotten you are!’
Chad took not the slightest notice. He drew her to him again, firmly but not hurtfully, and she despised herself yet again, for she had no strength to fight him, to resist when he took her lips, crushing them as before, nor did she attempt to stay the hand that lifted the wide hem of the smock to seek the firm small breast that he presently cupped and caressed. She quivered, ripples of sheer ecstasy seeming to be like electric shocks running through every fibre of her body. She responded when his mastery took the form of even greater temptation as he brought his hard body intimately to hers and she sensed the violence of his passion. He ordered her to kiss him and she obeyed meekly. His hand moved on her breast, warm and gentle and intimate. She was mad to allow it, but the madness had her in its grip and she could not escape. She found herself shaking violently when he whispered, his lips touching her ear,
‘Let’s go outside, Beth. You’re not really bothered about the buffet, are you?’
‘I—I—’ She was crying again, the tears rolling unchecked down her cheek. Her fear was swamping her—fear of herself, of Chad, of the afterwards when she would despise herself, knowing that she was despised by the man she loved. But she could not resist him. He had ruthlessly awakened her passions to a point where return was almost impossible. Never once had she felt like this with Kevin, never could she have given herself to him—or even thought of it.
‘Come ...’ He released her but held on to her hand. She felt the coolness that replaced the warmth of his hand on her breast ... and could have taken his hand and put it back.
‘Oh God ...’ she said, but to herself. Tomorrow she would be sunk in self-condemnation; she would feel tainted because it was not her whom Chad loved. He could make love to her, just for a diversion and to assuage his ardour. Oh, yes, she was desirable enough for that, but not desirable enough to become his wife.
Suddenly her sanity returned; it was like a reprieve, so great was her relief. She tugged at his hand, taking him completely by surprise. The next moment he was alone on the verandah, a faint smile on his lips as he watched the slender figure flying away from him towards the lighted window through which they had come a short time ago.
The repairs to the buildings were proceeding satisfactorily; the gardens were also looking far more attractive than they did a week ago. And in addition Carole had become settled again. She had been to see Doug, was shocked by the devastation caused by the storm to his house, his buildings and his lands. Hedges had been swept away and must be replaced; valuable trees had been brought down, his crops were ruined. The roof of his house was ripped from one end to the other, and the same thing had happened to his farm buildings.
‘He likes me a lot and I found I hadn’t the heart to leave him,’ Carole confided to Beth when she got back. ‘He’s so lost and dejected already, so I just had to cheer him up by saying I wasn’t leaving here after all.’
Beth, though relieved, just had to say,
‘If it’s only pity that you feel for him, Carole, is it wise to stay? He’ll obviously take it for granted that you care for him, and that’s the real reason for your change of mind.’
Carole nodded.
‘I know,’ she agreed, ‘but I must stay.’
‘Chad said he was thinking of giving up.’
‘That’s right, he was. But Chad’s not only sent most of his men over but he’s lending him some money as well.’
‘He is?’ Chad had not spoken much at all to Beth since the night of the dance. He had been over, supervising the repairs, discussing them with Joshua and the boys, but often he never even called at the homestead even though he was aware that the girls knew he was there. ‘Chad did promise to go, once he’d heard of the extent of the damage to Doug’s property. I’m glad he’s sent him some men.’
‘He’s good, Beth. He needs those men himself, he must do.’
‘Yes; he’s suffered a great deal of damage, I know.’ ‘He obviously considers Doug’s need to be greater than his.’
A man of dual personality, mused Beth. A man who could be generous and kind, putting himself out for others, but a rake in a way, wanting to make love to one girl when practically engaged to another. Yet Beth hated the idea of Chad being like that; he seemed too fine a person, too honourable, too concerned with his own self-respect. That he was domineering, bossy to a degree where he infuriated Beth, could not be denied, but she loved him so deeply that she felt sure she could become used to this eventually. She smiled to herself sometimes as she admitted just how confused she could become, convinced one moment that she and he would never agree, while the next moment she was telling herself that she would make herself put up with his highhanded ways—yes, if only he would love her and ask her to be his wife.
Dreams that could never come true, she told herself. Yet there had been occasions when she had felt sure he cared something about her, and although mainly his kisses had been fiercely hurtful and demanding, she certainly had known gentleness, had come very close, as well, but somehow there remained a barrier which was of his making, and Beth could only think that the barrier was Rosa.
Rosa’s father was due to come home within the week and all three cousins were interested to meet him and see what he was like. He had been a widower for several years and it was said that he adored his daughter and had been delighted when it seemed that Chad was interested in her. Another thing that interested the girls was that Doug had said that Rosa’s father and Chad were the greatest of friends.
‘He was your uncle’s friend, too,’ Doug had told Carole. ‘They were both of an age, so it was natural that they’d pal up together.’
Carole confided in Beth that she herself had offered to lend Doug some money, but he had refused to accept it, knowing she intended going away. When she told him she was staying he still refused to take it, and Beth suspected he still was not quite sure that he himself was Carole’s reason for staying. Beth mentioned Dick and saw Carole frown slightly. But Carole was non-committal and the subject was dropped.
Chad was not at the Club on Saturday, but he had been playing polo in the afternoon. Rosa was there with Neil and rumours were rife that she and Chad had quarrelled and had finished with one another. Beth felt sure they ha
d not quarrelled, but she could not help wondering if it was true that they had finished with one another. It was inevitable that Jo and Carole should ask Beth if she knew anything about it, and she rather thought that they believed she was not being wholly truthful when she said no, she knew nothing about it at all.
‘Well, it’s a surprise in a way—if they have parted, that is,’ said Jo, ‘because they do seem suited to one another.’
There was to be a second surprise for the girls, as when they arrived at the Jacana homestead it was to see Chad’s car in the drive and Chad sitting comfortably in a chair in the sitting-room. They all three exclaimed on seeing him through the window. And then they stopped, standing still as statues, staring disbelievingly at the other man who had just entered, two glasses in his hands.
‘Uncle Jack!’ It was Beth who found her voice first. ‘But what on earth has he come for?’
‘Let’s go inside and find out,’ suggested Jo practically. ‘Oh, but it’s great to see him!’
‘It is indeed,’ said the other two in unison.
The greetings were emotional but short, with Uncle Jack explaining right away that the letter from Jo and Carole had so disturbed him that he had done no more than book the first flight available and had come out to see for himself what was wrong.
‘I wasn’t sure when I’d arrive because the planes have been late owing to a strike or something. But I phoned Chad at seven this evening and he met me off the train. We’ve had a most pleasant evening and he’s been telling me everything. I haven’t seen the storm damage, but Chad tells me everything’s nicely under control.’
He was just the same, thought Beth affectionately, hoping he would stay until she herself went home. She knew he wanted to retire, and she supposed he would eventually sell his property to Chad. Chad was looking at Beth with an odd expression, having watched closely as each girl was hugged by her uncle. It was all an eye-opener to him, this fondness they all had for their uncle.
‘Have you had something to eat, Uncle?’ asked Jo. ‘If not I’ll get you something. Sara’s gone to see her mother and won’t be back until tomorrow and Rikuya always has Saturday night off because he’s found himself a girl-friend.’