by Brenda Joyce
It was damn close to midnight now.
Kait covered Sam with the quilt, tucking it up under her chin. Then she fussed with the covers, avoiding what she must say and do. She checked and saw that the glass of water on the bed stand was full, and with stirrings of full-fledged dread, she straightened and ever so slowly turned.
It was the first time she had been able to feel anything at all since seeing Lana and betraying her to Rafe. Her gaze locked with Trev’s.
“Thank you,” he said, staring oddly at her.
She couldn’t speak. He wasn’t going to be thankful or anything else in another moment or so, except, of course, for angry. In another few moments he would, undoubtedly, never look at her with love or affection again.
“Do you want a drink?” he asked, not moving.
The numbness continued to lift. A sick feeling formed in the pit of her stomach. “No.” If she ingested anything, even whiskey, she would vomit.
“Are you okay?” he asked warily.
“No.”
His jaw flexed. “You’ve been acting odd all day.”
He would never hold her again. They would never make love again. Their eyes would never again meet in silent communication, with a small, shared smile following. “We have to talk.”
He stared.
“Please.” She hesitated, still frozen by Sam’s bed. “Privately.”
“I don’t like the sound of this,” he said, the mask she hated coming down, first over his eyes and then over the rest of his features until he seemed more like a statue than a flesh and blood man.
“You shouldn’t. I have something to say....You won’t like it.”
He remained still, wariness entering his eyes.
Kait tried to breathe deeply, but it was simply impossible, as her breathing was rapid and shallow. She managed to move, and she walked past him, knowing now how it felt to walk to one’s own execution. She heard and then felt Trev following her. She chose not to go a few steps down the hall to their bedroom, but downstairs, to the living room, territory that felt neutral.
Once there, he walked right past her to pour himself a large scotch.
“I’m not Lana,” she said. And the moment she spoke, words she never intended to utter so abruptly, her heart exploded in a fearful frenzy within her chest.
Trev had just turned to face her, the scotch in hand. He did not lift it, and if he was stunned, he did not show it.
And it was Kait who was stunned. Disbelieving in spite of her earlier suspicions, she thought, He knew. “I’m her twin sister. My name is Kait. Kait London.”
He set the scotch down, untouched. She saw that his hand trembled ever so slightly. “I know.”
She stared, his words a nearly fatal blow. “Since when?” It never crossed her mind that Rafe had told him.
His face tightened. “Since we slept together.”
Another blow. It was hard to breathe, to stand up, to think. “Why?”
His mouth twisted bitterly. “Why? Isn’t that the question I should be asking you?”
She had to speak. “If you knew, why didn’t you say something?”
“Why? I decided to play the game by your rules... Kait,” he said coolly.
She didn’t, couldn’t, understand. Except of course she understood. Every moment they had shared had been a lie on his part as well as hers. Except his lies seemed worse now, because they were lies of the heart. “So this reconciliation of ours...”
“Two can play the same game, Kait.” His nostrils flared. She saw the beginning of dark anger in his eyes. “Just like you, I can act when I have to.”
She didn’t want to feel, but pain joined the medley of impossibly hurtful emotions afflicting her now. “Do you have any real feelings for me?”
And now, he was startled. “No.”
She somehow remained upright. “Everything was an act. Every moment—every caress—every kiss.”
“Yes.” His regard intensified. “So now it’s my turn. Why? Why the charade... Kait?”
She thought she would swoon. He didn’t love her, he never had. She wanted to tell him how she felt. She was terrified of exposing herself. “I had no choice.”
“No choice?” Suddenly he strode toward her. Kait cringed. “Everyone has choices, Kait.”
“I can explain, give me a moment....I can’t breathe,” she gasped, and it was the truth. The room was graying before her very eyes, and she was afraid now that she would faint.
“No, I can explain.” Now the hardness covered his face. And with it, there was disgust and revulsion, bitter and sharp. “The apple doesn’t fall far from the tree—not ever—now, does it, Kait? You and Lana are two of a kind!”
“No! We’re completely different people!” Kait cried. Fear and panic washed over her with the force of a tidal wave. But this was what she had expected. She had expected nothing less. Still, her heart had hoped for understanding, for forgiveness and a future of love.
“And I have another question for you,” he said, his face creased in lines of loathing. “How many times did the two of you switch places? How often have you done this?”
“Never!” she cried. “I mean, when we were really little kids we’d swap places.... This was the only time—I didn’t even know that Lana was married until she went to New York City to see me last week!”
“Really?” He was trembling now, mockery inflaming his tone. “Like hell. Because I remember your name. Kait London. It has a ring. A nice sound. Kait London. We had a meeting years ago, and you didn’t show up—you had Lana show up instead!”
“No! Lana set me up, Trev, just the way she set you up,” Kait cried, very close to tears.
“I think the two of you are a team,” Trev said furiously. Kait shook her head wildly. “Please listen to me! Lana and I were never close, not even growing up! She was always the wild one, the popular one! She was the extrovert and the thrill-seeker, she had all the boys, while I was always at home studying or at the stables hiding behind horses. We weren’t even friends as children, and I hadn’t seen her in six or seven years until last week! I had no idea she’d married you and I had no idea she had a child—none! Her call came out of the blue,” Kait cried.
“If you are such an honest person, then you would have never agreed to walk into her life, pretending to be her, duping not just me, but my children!”
Kait jumped back—away from him. “She said she was in trouble, that she needed help! I was so happy to see her again, I was so happy to have my twin sister back that I would have jumped off the roof of the Empire State Building if she had asked.”
He had become still. For one moment, Kait thought she had some-how, miraculously, gotten through to him, until he spoke. And when he spoke, she knew her fate was sealed. “Fuck with me,” he said softly, “but never with my children.” And before she could blink, in an act of rage, he flung his glass of scotch across the room.
Kait jumped as the glass shattered behind her, scotch spraying her back and shoulders.
And then he was looming over her. His hands closed over her throat. Kait gasped, meeting the most livid gaze she had ever imagined. And she realized the one thing she hadn’t thought of was that he might wish to kill her—or that he might be so enraged that he would actually do so. Their eyes met and locked.
But his hands did not tighten on her neck. He released her, but did not move his body away, blocking her against the wall.
“You walked into my life—Sam’s life—Marni’s life!” He gritted. “Pretending to be my wife! Don’t you dare tell me you are different from her!” He shook her once. “She’s a whore, Kait, and so are you. A lousy, lying whore.”
How his words hurt. Kait heard herself whimper, but the pain was in her heart, not from his grasp on her shoulders.
He paled, leaving two bright splotches of pink on his cheeks, and he pushed her away. Then he clasped his head, turning away, and she thought she heard him moan.
She fell hard against the wall. She somehow wound u
p on the floor, a crumpled heap. “I was trying to help my twin sister,” she begged. “She told me she owed all this money to a loan shark and stupidly I believed her. She said he’d kill her, or Marni, and I believed her. She said I only had to cover for her for a few days, and I believed her. I had no idea she was setting me up to take her place here.”
He whirled. “For all I know, you knew the whole game, and decided it was your turn to help yourself to the cushy life I could give you!”
“No! I came to help Lana, and then I fell in love with Marni, and Sam....” And you, she wanted to add. But she didn’t dare. She felt tears streaking down her face.
“You love yourself!” he shouted at her. “Don’t you dare, ever, tell me that you love Marni or Sam.”
“I do love Marni!” she managed to shout back.
He grabbed her and dragged her to her feet before she could continue. “Stop it!” he roared, shaking her. “Shut up, before I lose what little control I do have! You don’t love us! You’ve used us, just like that bitch of a sister of yours! That’s what the two of you are, a pair of beautiful manipulating bitches.”
Kait clung to him. “I only told you one lie,” she whispered hoarsely, “and that one lie was who I am. Everything else was the truth.”
“I don’t want to hear any more,” he cried, and he threw her away. He started for the door.
She crashed against the wall, caught herself somehow, and hung on. “Trev, wait, please!”
He didn’t pause, and he didn’t stop.
Kait watched him disappear, and she slid down the wall, hugging herself, weeping. How quickly, then, she had lost him.
Except she had never had him. He had known the truth from the moment they’d made love.
She wept harder.
“Here.”
At the sound of Max Zara’s voice, Kait froze. She looked up to see him offering her a tissue. His blue eyes were soft and kind. “I really love him,” she said.
“I know you do.”
CHAPTER 20
Kait hadn’t been able to sleep. She had spent most of the night tossing and turning, her heart broken, wrapping her body around her pillow. Trev’s side of the bed had remained empty.
Now the raucous cries of blue jays awoke her and she realized she had managed, at long last, to doze off for an hour or so. An unfocused glance across the bedroom showed her that dawn had grayed the morning sky but that the sun wasn’t up yet. She didn’t move, images of Trev, Marni, and Sam assailing her. How every single memory hurt.
She also thought about her sister and her heart lurched with dread. Where was she now? There had been no phone call in the middle of the night from the police, so Kait knew they hadn’t caught her. Kait thought about all that she had done and she closed her eyes tightly, against more tears, more pain. She hugged her pillow more closely, then felt a soft downy limb against the back of her hand.
Kait moved the pillow and saw Marni sleeping peacefully beside her, a squishy teddy bear in her arms. Tears fell. She tossed the pillow onto the floor and pulled Lana’s daughter into her arms.
She had the strength to leave Fox Hollow, to leave Trev. But how would she find the strength to leave Marni?
Marni’s eyes fluttered open. She smiled beatifically and yawned. Kait stroked her hair. “I see I had a little visitor last night,” she whispered unsteadily.
“I had a bad dream,” Marni said, snuggling closer. “I dreamed you went away!”
Kait couldn’t speak. She stared into her niece’s eyes and thought about how Lana wanted her to stay and take care of her daughter. Of course, Lana had never counted on Kait’s need to turn her sister in or the fact that Trev might be a step ahead of them both.
“I’m here,” she said hoarsely. “Go back to sleep. It’s only six. I’ll wake you at seven, sweetie.”
Marni nodded, hugging her teddy bear more tightly, her eyes drifting closed. Kait stroked her hair for a moment, until she was soundly asleep. Then she got up.
It crossed her mind to call Rafe Coleman, but she decided against it.
Kait washed up and slipped on her Levi’s and T-shirt. But autumn had taken a turn for the worse; it was a cold morning. She grabbed Trev’s old gray sweatshirt and donned that, then went into the hall in a pair of fleece-lined leather slippers.
At Sam’s door, she paused. Concern filled her and it was a godsend, briefly chasing away her own worries. Kait carefully opened the door, not wanting to awaken her if she was still sleeping. Sam hadn’t even changed position from the night before; she remained dead to the world, on her back, the covers pulled up under her chin and tucked in tightly around her body like a straitjacket.
Kait backed out. Sam was exhausted, and with good cause. She continued downstairs. On the threshold of the kitchen she faltered. She had expected to be alone at this early hour and she was very wrong.
Trev and Elizabeth sat at the kitchen table with mugs of coffee. Trev looked as if he had had a sleepless night as well. He was unshaved, with circles under his eyes, his hair finger-combed. From Elizabeth’s long and concerned expression, and the way she had been leaning toward him, Kait had no doubt that they had been up for hours and that Elizabeth now knew the full extent of Kait’s treachery.
She looked up first. Anger, horror, and outrage mingled; it was hard to tell which emotion was predominant.
“Good morning,” Kait managed, and then ignored her. She was looking directly at Trev.
He shifted and raised his eyes to hers. He didn’t speak.
Elizabeth stood. “You’ve done enough here. You’re not wanted here. When are you leaving?”
Kait squared her shoulders. “I’ll pack after breakfast,” she said, trying to hide her own emotions now. But her tone had sounded hoarse and broken to her own ears. She glanced at Trev again. Their gazes locked this time, very carefully.
It was Kait who quickly looked away, her heart racing. She wondered if he knew more than he had let on last night.
“I’ll see if the papers arrived.” Elizabeth stood, anger in her rigid shoulders and abrupt motions.
Kait poured herself a cup of coffee, aware of the way her hands trembled and that she was helpless to control it. She could not bear Trev’s hatred. Yet this was what she had expected. She had known that if he ever learned the truth about her deception, he would reject her out of hand.
But her heart clearly had harbored such foolish hopes and dreams, and somehow, still did.
How could she have done what she had?
Could she ever forgive herself?
Kait looked at Trev again. He was staring at his coffee as if it were a vile poison, and as if she were not even in the room. She didn’t dare sit down at the table, so she stood with her mug in hand, her hip against the counter. There was no mistaking that she was an intruder now.
Suddenly he stood up. “Where is she?”
Kait froze. She did not have to ask whom he referred to. “I don’t know. But she said she’s not coming back.”
He stared at her. “That,” he finally said, “is good riddance in my book.” His eyes blazed as he grabbed his fleece-lined windbreaker.
A siren sounded once, twice, cut off abruptly, a warning blast.
Kait stiffened at the sound, trepidation filling her. Everything she had done since yesterday slammed over her like a runaway train. And she couldn’t help it—her game was a dangerous one and she was scared.
The siren sounded again—and this time it was one short staccato blast.
Was this what she thought it was? She had meant it when she had told Rafe to arrest her. Once Kait was in jail and everyone believed that Lana had been caught, Lana would think her setup had worked, and she would let her guard down. She would become careless, reckless, and eventually she would be caught. Or so Kait hoped. It was, Kait thought, their only chance to catch her before she vanished without a trace into another wealthy community.
Trev glanced out the window. “It’s Rafe,” he said tersely, “and two other cars.
” He gave Kait a puzzled look and hurried from the room.
Kait remained in the kitchen, not moving. She now understood what fight or flight meant. Her body had become as taut as a bowstring, as if she somehow knew that nothing was going to go the way she had planned and that she should make a run for it.
But that was her nerves talking. She was not running. She had survived all of her sister’s lies, and now it was Lana’s turn to do the running.
Footsteps sounded. Kait somehow moved cautiously, warily, forward, reminding herself to be brave, reminding herself that she had told the truth, and that she was innocent, that Farrell had stolen the ring, and as she stepped into the hall, the front door flew open. Rafe entered. He was in full uniform, including his western-style hat and his dark, impenetrable sunglasses. He had never looked more intimidating. “Morning, Trev, Elizabeth,” he said. Two officers stood behind him, as menacing in appearance and intent.
“What’s going on, Rafe?” Trev demanded darkly.
“Lookin’ for a thief.” Rafe removed his sunglasses and turned his green stare on Kait. “Parker was hit recently. Maybe even the night of the fall ball. Took a Harry Winston diamond ring. I’d say it was an inside job. Wouldn’t you?”
She began to tremble. She was innocent, but she wished now that Rafe were not so intimidating. “You didn’t find her?”
“You mean, did I find your twin? Nope. We had the D.C. police on it, and we checked every flight bound for Paris, and every possible connection out of Reagan last night. Afraid your little tip didn’t work, sister.” He reached into the interior pocket of his bomber jacket and withdrew a folded document as Kait shrank with growing dread. This was an act on his part—wasn’t it?
“Gotta warrant to search the house,” he said, his regard unwavering on Kait.