by Dean, Ali
Anyway, I hadn’t gotten a chance to think about how my presence might be received. Vanessa, Jeremy’s older sister and the twins’ mom, was the first to ask, “So, now that you and Hazel are finally together, will we be seeing you at Sunday dinners, Cruz?”
It was a rhetorical question, apparently, because Mimi said, “Oh, and the occasional breakfast. Did you know that Hazel’s going to relax her training a bit this season? I think it’s a great idea.”
Ian closed the grill and looked over his shoulder. “Relax training? What, no five AM wake-up calls to hit the gym? Define ‘relaxing’ in Hazel Ross terms.”
And just like that, my relationship status was accepted by the rest of Hazel’s family.
It was odd, sitting beside Jeremy on the back deck and shooting the shit. He’d just come from a six-hour meeting with a mafia boss, and here we were chatting about the Red Sox. I wasn’t so impatient to find out the outcome of the meeting. I figured if he was here, we had at least this time before we had to make a move. I wanted to pause it, chill here for a little while longer. It was so damn nice to just be.
Hazel was kicking around a ball with the guys, and I was attempting to keep my mind at PG level. It wasn’t working too great, even surrounded by all three men who’d raised her. She’d been sliding her phone out of her back pocket and giving it death stares for the past ten minutes. Finally, she took it out and headed inside. Of course, I followed her.
“Who is it?” I asked.
She was walking toward the bathroom and handed me her phone before going inside.
Three different numbers were on a group text with her; none of them were contacts from her address book.
Unknown number 1: Did you make a decision? We saw what we saw, Hazel. Maybe it was a coincidence, but the police might not think so.
Unknown number 2: We would have said something sooner but the guys are always with you. They’re dangerous.
Number 1: Until Cruz got arrested, we’d convinced ourselves we shouldn’t tell anyone. Now, we think we should. But for you, we won’t. If you help us in exchange.
The third number wasn’t chiming in. I figured that was Melissa. She seemed the least on board with this little scheme.
When I heard the toilet flush and the sink turn on, I glanced back to see if anyone else was in the house and then opened the door and shut it behind me.
“Ignore them.”
Hazel dried her hands with a towel. “I’m trying.” I could hear the frustration in her voice. I didn’t want it there.
I pulled her to me. “Hey. You know what?”
“What?” She looked up at me and I could tell she was already a little calmer.
“Today was one of the best days.” I meant it too. “For me, it might have been my favorite day.”
Hazel looked at me like I’d lost my mind. “We spent most of the day waiting to find out if Seamus Malone had killed my dad or if they were going to come shooting at us or something.” She paused before adding, “And aren’t we still waiting to see if that might happen?”
I shook my head. “No, you’re seeing it all wrong.” I kissed her forehead, then her nose. “This morning,” I said, keeping my voice low, “I had sex for the first time. With you. I’ll admit, the first time might not have been all that memorable for you,” I said with self-deprecation, “but I will never forget it.”
She gave me a smile at that. “I won’t either.”
“And then I got to hang out with my dad for longer than I have in months, and he got to see you and the guys and embarrass me with stories. And now, now we’re with your family and it’s all good. Ignore the texts.”
“Okay,” she said, and I sensed she was a little choked up. From which part, I wasn’t sure.
“In this life, Hazel, we have to soak up each good moment. Because you’re right, we don’t know what’s coming next. It could be taken from us.”
She went up on her tiptoes and pressed her lips to mine, pulling my head down at the same time. This was Hazel, doing exactly what I’d told her to do, in her way. She didn’t rationalize it, or bother to mope a second longer. Her frustration was gone, and now she was pressing her body into mine. Being in the moment, with me. I’d let her take this with me any time.
My hands pressed into her lower back and I steadied myself on the counter as she moved her hips into mine. I groaned, wanting more. I nearly forgot we were dry humping in her grandparents’ bathroom while the rest of her family was just outside.
But then there was a knock on the door. “Seriously, you guys?” It was Emmett.
Hazel pulled her mouth from mine. Her eyes widened and I grinned. She’d forgotten where we were too.
“Uncle Jeremy was about to come in to get the pasta salad from the fridge and I ran in ahead of him. You’re welcome.” I heard him walk away as my body instantly cooled with the thought of Hazel’s dad realizing what we were doing. What was I thinking? Sure, Jeremy knew what was up and Pops was the one who gave me the condoms, but I could show a little more respect.
“You go first,” I told her.
Hazel took a deep breath, winked at me, and opened the door. I loved hanging with Hazel and her family but if this was going to be a regular thing, I’d have to get a handle on myself. A little self-restraint wouldn’t ruin this day though. I didn’t know what was next, but I had enough good moments to get me through it.
Chapter 16
Hazel
We were back in the basement at Bruno’s.
“I thought the house wasn’t bugged anymore?” I asked.
“It’s not,” Dad said. “I took them all out the day after –” he hesitated a second “– on Friday morning. I took them out on Friday. But they might have eyes on the house. I know they know you’re all friends but I told Seamus today that none of you are involved. I want to keep you as far from it as possible for as long as possible.”
“So, what happened?” I asked the question we were all here for.
“He’s taking it back to his colleagues, he said, to decide how to handle it.”
I stared at Dad. The guys were all here too, but they were letting me ask the questions, I guess. “That’s it? After six hours with him, that’s all you got?”
“Well, at first he gave this elaborate apology for what happened to you. He didn’t admit to anyone in his family breaking into our house, bugging it, or shooting up the Moodys’. Then I told him I’ve got everything on his family to bring them down, I’ve identified his insiders and we have insiders of our own, and that if anything happens to me it’ll come out.”
“What’d he do?”
“He didn’t believe me at first, but I showed enough cards I think he’s convinced.”
Bodhi said, “I would’ve loved to see the look on his face when it sunk in.”
“He shit himself or what?” Spike asked.
“He kept it all pretty stone cold. Couldn’t get a good read. He’s never shown much emotion. His sons and nephews didn’t get that. Maybe Neil did a little. Anyway, I laid out the terms. Told him that Braven would be my new employer and I didn’t want them involved in Malone biz anymore. He tried to push to find out how involved I was with the Donovans, asked a lot about your dad, Cruz, but I think I convinced him it’s purely business. Me wanting to get out of the illegal stuff. He doesn’t know I know about your mom and didn’t point-blank ask about Flynn, even when I said he had to drop charges against Cruz.”
“Dad, you’ll need to make sure that goes for all of the guys,” I told him. “Some girls at school said they saw the guys leaving Flynn’s house that night, but we don’t know if they’re lying.”
Dad rubbed his chin. “I’ll have to figure out how to do that without letting on we talk like this.”
Cruz suggested, “Just tell them your daughter was upset because some girls at school are trying to blackmail her into letting them on the varsity team by saying they’ll report us for murder if she doesn’t.”
Dad nodded, like this additional news wa
s perfectly normal. I was still having a mild panic attack over the encounter last night and each text reminding me of it. I hated not doing anything, and didn’t want to be responsible for blowing this up. But Dad took it in stride, adding it as another item on his to-do list.
“Another term was that I don’t want any of his boys coming near you, Hazel. He told me they’d been sent earlier that day to apologize to you. Did that happen?”
I caught Cruz swinging his head my way just as I nodded. “Yeah, and we made the same thing clear to them directly.”
Dad’s expression softened then. He looked like he wanted to hug me and I wanted that hug too. I’d wanted one since I’d seen him on the back porch at dinner. But I hadn’t wanted to alarm the rest of our family who had no clue what was going on. I didn’t reach for him though, because Cruz was pissed.
“What? Why didn’t anyone tell me this? What the hell happened?”
Emmett told him what went down at Shaw’s Shack. “We’re telling you now. It’s done.”
Cruz looked at me. “Maybe not the best day for you then, huh?” he murmured.
I pressed my lips together, my mind going straight to the kiss earlier, and our morning at the Spot. I shrugged. “No, it was still a great day.”
Dad got us back on track. “I gave him a week to answer before the first leak goes out. He’s probably hiring another hacker right now to try to figure out what I did and how to undo it. They won’t be able to. This is why it took nearly five years. Even if he can find the best hackers out there, which won’t be easy to do, they won’t crack much.”
I didn’t know how that was possible, but I trusted Dad. He wasn’t stating this with pride; no, he was stating it as fact. I glanced at Moody, the only one who might have more knowledge about the validity of this claim. He was gazing at my dad like he’d just cured cancer.
“I think they’ll take the week to analyze what I’ve told them I’ve got on them, see if there’s a way around it. I don’t think they’ll make a move. But we need to be on guard. You all need to act like nothing in your life has changed – beside the blackmail thing with the soccer girls,” Dad added dismissively. I almost laughed. Right, “the blackmail thing” that could send all the guys to jail for murder. “Show up for school, practice, your usual hang-outs. And we wait.”
Waiting. I could do that. It felt like I’d been doing it a lifetime.
“Um, question,” I said, fighting the urge to raise my hand. “I know how to use a gun now. Should I carry one around with me?”
Dad didn’t even think about it. “Yes.”
“Next question,” I said, hoping that I’d set this up right. “Can Cruz sleep at our house? You know, for protection?” Dad let me sleep away from home plenty, but I didn’t want to do that every night. Besides, it wouldn’t be consistent with our “normal” schedule we were trying to keep up. Of all the questions I’d asked and difficult topics we’d addressed, this one was clearly the most difficult for Dad. I should’ve felt guilty for putting this on him on top of everything else, but the distressed look on his face over a boy sleeping in my room almost made me laugh. Blackmail, murder charges, me carrying a loaded weapon, none of that fazed him. But my boyfriend in my room, even if it was for additional protection, he was totally clueless on how to handle it.
“If I say no you’re just going to stay at the Spot or the Lake, aren’t you?”
“I mean, you could ground me if I did. But it seems like we have bigger problems.”
I had him, and he knew it.
“No, Cruz cannot sleep over at our house in your bedroom. And no, you can’t stay anywhere but our house on school nights. However, I stopped checking on you in the middle of the night about fifteen years ago and I don’t plan on starting now.”
I had to press my lips together to keep from laughing, and when I glanced around, I noticed everyone else was fighting it too.
A snort escaped from someone, Bodhi, I think, and then Emmett couldn’t hold it in. A second later we were all laughing, except for Dad, who was shaking his head. He looked overwhelmed. And finally, I got up and leaned over to give him that hug.
“I love you, Dad. I’m so glad you’re safe.” I wanted to thank him for so many things. For working hard from the beginning to support us, to trying to get out when he figured out what was going on with the Malones. Mostly, I wanted him to know I thought he was doing the right thing now, even though it was a huge risk. He couldn’t live the rest of his life like this, working for a corrupt world because he didn’t have a choice.
Chapter 17
Cruz
I waited until midnight to sneak into Hazel’s room that night, and left by five in the morning. She’d partly woken up when I climbed in and out of bed, but fell right back to sleep. It was a mild form of torture, lying beside her in bed with her dad down the hall. My girl needed her sleep and I wasn’t going to wake her, but knowing Jeremy could barge in at any moment kept me in check.
I did what I always did each morning when I woke before the rest of the world -- worked for an hour at our security firm and spent another hour working out. I did this at the Spot, where I could let my guard down a notch.
Shit was still happening while we waited on the Malones. On Tuesday morning, Kylie and Afua were standing by Hazel’s locker. Kylie glared at me before turning to Hazel. “Do they let you go to the bathroom alone?” she sassed.
Hazel stiffened for a second before putting on a mask of indifference as she put in the combination on her locker. “I see you’re still going with the blackmail strategy.” She sounded bored, but I knew these girls were getting under her skin.
“We didn’t get pulled to the varsity field yesterday. You’re really willing to risk our testimony against your cousins, your boyfriend, your best friends?”
Hazel turned to look at the two girls. Her expression softened just a touch. “You’re going to regret this. It’s not worth it.”
“Easy for you to say,” Afua said. “Come on, Kylie. We have our answer.”
We stood there watching them go down the hall. I could feel Hazel deflating beside me. “Dad’s talking to Seamus today about the Flynn case. He’s going to request it be closed permanently.”
I pulled her hand until she was focused on me. I was greedy like that. “I’m glad you didn’t tell them the truth.”
“The truth?”
“Yeah. I mean, I really don’t let you go to the bathroom alone. Bathrooms are sort of my favorite place to be with you lately.”
I had her back against the locker, caged in by my arms, and I felt her shake a little with suppressed laughter. She told me, “I was just thinking that you looked super hot right now, and where could we sneak off to be alone before first period?”
I brushed my lips against hers. “Your dad only said you have to stay at your house on weekdays. We’ll get to be together this weekend.” That was a long three days away, but between school, soccer, and getting the rest of our shit done, there wasn’t much opportunity to sneak off together.
“I have my Harvard visit this weekend, remember?”
I closed my eyes to hide my disappointment. I’d somehow blocked it out. “We’ll be around the campus then. Harvard’s still Malone territory.”
“I know. Does it make me weak that I like knowing you and the guys will have my back?”
“A week ago, before the Malones got to you and you learned all this, would you have wanted us around all the time, up in your business?”
She shook her head. “No. It was already starting to drive me nuts and I didn’t know anything yet. You know I was fine on my own the past three years.”
I raised my eyebrows. “Were you?”
She shrugged. “Fine, yeah. I was fine. Nothing more. Now, it’s more. I’m more myself now though. Happier is too trite.” I watched her struggle with it before putting her out of her misery.
“You’re scared though, and that’s on us. You’re still independent, Hazel. But you know what could happen now,
and honestly, it’d be dumb if you didn’t want protection right now. I don’t want you to be scared anymore. We’re going to figure this out, okay? The last thing you need to be afraid of, though, is wanting us around. We want you too. We need you. I need you.”
“We don’t really need a bathroom, do we? Just kiss me here. I don’t care.”
I did. It was short and sweet, but it would have to do. As usual, we had an audience.
* * *
Jeremy was monitoring the Defiance Falls police reports and nothing came in that day about Flynn’s murder. No witness accounts. Nothing came in the next day, or the day after that, either.
It was a hot one on Thursday, and we hit up the Lake after practice. Hazel was headed into Cambridge after practice on Friday, and this was our chance to regroup.
The guys were on edge. Waiting on the Malones to call truce or declare war was bad. We’d always had at least an illusion of control over the situation, or part of it. Now it felt entirely out of our hands. We were either about to sit back and let all their wrongs slide or we would be in battle our entire senior year, maybe throughout college.
We were letting loose now. Spike had picked up fried chicken and sides and Moody, who had the best fake ID, had filled a cooler with beer.
Bodhi swung across the rope swing and jumped into the Lake, and his twin followed a moment later.
Hazel came over and sat between my legs in the grass. She’d changed from her soccer clothes to a bathing suit. My hands immediately went to the bare skin on her thigh and she leaned back into me, a smile on her face.
“Do you ever think about how this could all change?” she asked.
“This?”
“Yeah. Say the Malones agree to the truce. They let Dad go, stop dealing with Braven pharma, you guys are off the hook for Flynn. We let their stuff go and they continue with their criminal enterprise without involving us. Say that all happens. Then what?”