by Amity Cross
"What was that, mate?" Joe asked after giving me a minute of silence. He slid on his sunglasses and waited for me to formulate something coherent.
"I want to keep Blair out of this as much as possible," I said. "She's had a hard life, Joe. I want to protect her from getting hurt again."
"The press will focus on her until she's gone. Sorry to be blunt, but that's a fact. It won't be about the music or the tour, it'll be about you and her. You know how these fuckers work. Gossip sells rags and you're a font of it, mate."
I sighed and ran a hand over my face. Furlough would get pissed because the tour wouldn't make as much cash, Blair would be overwhelmed and hurt by the gossip rags and everything would fall apart. Unless we found a compromise.
"If you really wanted to protect her from all this, why are you bringing her on tour?" Joe asked, looking at me over the top of his sunglasses.
All I had was the truth and I knew he'd see right through me if I didn't let him in on it. "If I let her out of my sight, I'm afraid I'll never see her again."
"Oh, so she's a runner, huh?"
"It's her stock standard response to the first hint of trouble. After the shit at the airport the other day, it's a wonder she got on the fucking plane."
"What happened at the airport?" His brow furrowed and I guessed he hadn't looked at the news lately.
"The usual, but this time it was worse. After that stupid fucking picture at the hotel…shit. They were all over us, trying to force her to answer questions, shoving cameras in her face."
"I don't know what advice to give you, West. You've made your bed, now you've gotta fuck in it. It's probably always gunna be like this."
"Yeah, fuck, do I know it."
"Talk to her. I know you're not the master of talking about your feelings, but shit. If she's the one like you think she is, transparency is the best approach…and honesty."
I shook my head at my best mate, wondering why he could keep his head screwed on and I couldn't. Sure, he fucked his fair share of women on the road, drank most of us under the table, but he'd never taken drugs, never made promises he couldn't keep, never did anything in excess. He knew his limits and stuck to them. I found myself wishing I were a little more like Joe.
By the time we got back to the hotel, it was getting dark and my mood was down to a slow simmer, but I was still aching to see Blair. After the day I'd had, I just wanted to bury myself in her and then maybe we could talk about shit. I was finally ready to talk. I left Joe behind in the hotel bar and made my way upstairs. My phone buzzed in my back pocket and I saw it was Furlough calling. I declined the bastard and turned the phone on silent. I'd deal with his shit tomorrow, no doubt he had a few choice words to say about my behavior, but that was a dish best served when I wasn't so worked up and fucking horny.
I walked into the hotel room, dying to lay eyes on Blair, to touch her…but the room was dark and she wasn't in it. A weird as fuck chill reverberated through me as I flicked on the light. She said she'd be here, but that fact that she wasn't made me worried, annoyed, angry…a billion different things I couldn't comprehend.
Pulling out my phone, I dialed her number. She picked up after three rings and the background noise didn't do much to curb my lack of enthusiasm. It sounded like she was at a party.
"West?" came her voice.
"Where are you?" It came out a little shorter than I'd intended.
There was a pause before she replied. "Some place called the Intrepid Fox."
"I know it," I said. "I'll meet you out front in twenty." It wasn't far from the hotel and I wondered how she'd managed to sniff out the only pure alternative pub in Soho. She'd fit right in there with it's swarm of metalheads, punks and goths.
Not wanting to deal with Furlough, I called the car around myself, this time sliding into a black limo. My thoughts went back to the ride to the airport with Blair on my lap and a wicked smile crept onto my lips. I couldn't get there fast enough.
I stood on the footpath, my hands shoved deep into the pockets of my new jacket, Ace of Spades by Motorhead blaring from the pub behind me. The alcohol I'd downed had done nothing to curb my fluttering gut and that hot psychobilly guy that had tried to pick me up had only ignited old tendencies. In short, I was up shit creek without a paddle. I was hoping the moment I laid eyes on Dark and Dangerous that it would solve this stupid conflict I'd been feeling. If I saw him, then I'd know, right?
When a black piece of shit limo pulled up in front of me, my heart sank like a ton of bricks. When West got out and strode towards me, instead of the overwhelming need to touch him, I only felt my skin prickle.
"You came to pick me up in a fucking limo?" I rolled my eyes at the shiny black car parked out the front of the pub. Talk about contrasts. A group of goths and metal heads stood out the front, fags hanging out their mouths, watching our exchange like it was their lucky night.
"That's the guy from Affliction," I heard one of them say.
"Get in the car, Blair," West said, his gaze darkening.
"You're pissed at me?" I scoffed.
"Get in." He snapped out the order and gestured toward the open door.
With a scowl, I put my head down and got in. I had to do something sooner or later to piss him off, didn't I? That was my MO. The moment the door closed behind him, the limo took off.
"You said you'd be there when I got back." Fuck, he sounded like a spoilt little brat.
My hackles automatically rose. "Yeah, well I went to the pub instead."
"Blair," he said before sighing. He looked like he'd had a rough day, but so had I.
"I'm used to the bus, West. The fucking bus. This," I waved my hands around the la di da interior with its little fridge of booze and leather seats, "is not the bus."
"No, it's not," he said, trying to hide his smile.
"You think this is funny?" I slid toward him, jamming my arm against his, making sure the studs on my jacket dug into his skin.
"I think you're overreacting and I think you should calm down and enjoy it."
I probably should count my lucky stars and all that shit, but the crux of it was the fact that I felt like I didn't deserve it. I was nothing but a great lay and all of this stuff felt like payment.
West grasped my knee and yanked me across his lap as the limo pulled away from the pub, forcing me to straddle him. I could feel his cock through his jeans and as usual, it was already semi-hard.
"I don't want to buy you, beautiful. I want to win you with my charm." He crushed his mouth against mine, plunging his tongue deep and pulled back just as suddenly. "I told you," he growled against my lips, "I don't give a fuck about the money, but I didn't say anything about being driven around. I like being driven."
I grazed the tip of my tongue over his bottom lip, winding my arms around his neck. "Would you like me to drive?"
He pulled back, his gaze searching mine. A look passed across his features, one that I'd come to know very well, and it was all the answer I needed. Lifting off him with my knees digging into the posh seats, I undid the button of my shorts, his hands grasping my hips to keep me steady.
"Blair," he began, licking his lips.
"Shh," I murmured. "Let me drive."
Sliding off him, I pulled my shorts and knickers off and air hit my throbbing pussy. Knowing that I was about to ride my Dark and Dangerous sent me into overdrive. I knew I was already soaked and ready to take his cock inside me. West fumbled with the zipper on his jeans, taking them off to his knees, dragging his boxers down at the same time, and his cock was out, fully hard and standing to attention. So fucking primed and ready for me to impale myself on it.
I licked my lips as I felt the urge to take him in my mouth, to taste his salty pre-cum on my tongue, but this was about me. It was my turn to fuck him and I was going to come the way I wanted to. He rolled a condom over his length as I straddled him again, the movement of the limo as it drove through the streets of London, only adding fuel to the fire.
Replacing his
hand with mine, I rubbed his tip against my wet opening and guided him just inside. Even as I was poised and ready to fuck West, I knew this was the old Blair coming out to play. She was the part of me that fucked without connection, fucked without feeling, fucked just to chase an orgasm, fucked to get what she wanted. Was it a relapse on my part? Travelling down the same old beaten path I'd promised not to go down again? Probably, but I was too fucking horny to give a shit.
I lowered myself slowly, groaning as he filled me up, our pelvis' coming together. Swirling my hips in a slow circle forced him deeper still and massaged my clit with just the right amount of pressure. West let out a tortured moan and tried to take my mouth with his, but I threw my head back and began fucking him, moving up and down his hard cock, my breaths coming faster as I chased what I wanted.
We weren't touching anywhere else, the moment had lost all sense of intimacy, even though our most private parts were grinding together. I rode him in the back of that limo as the world passed us by, a world that was blissfully unaware that two people were fucking their brains out through the tinted windows.
His fingers dug into the skin of my hips as he helped me stroke his cock with my pussy, our breathing labored, the air thick with the heady scent of sex. Every time I took him to the hilt, I slapped into my clit, sending spikes of pleasure right through my entire body. My nipples ached against my bra, but neither of us stopped to touch anywhere else but where we were joined.
This was my revenge for last night's fuck. I wouldn't let West dominate me again. He was mine.
I quickened my pace, pushing down on his shoulders, dictating his pleasure. I was chasing my orgasm and mine alone and I was probably being a huge fucking bitch right then, but I didn't care if he came or not. But knowing West, he'd come the moment I tightened around his cock.
I began to come, not as hard as I would've liked, but hard enough. This time, I pounded against him, moaning and whimpering as my orgasm came in long delicious waves. As I was starting to come down, West jerked beneath me, signaling he was finishing and I sat up, letting his cock fall out of me like the bitch I was. His gaze was pure fire as he took himself in his own hands, milking the remainder of his orgasm. I sat back onto the seat beside him and pulled my undies and shorts back on, casting my gaze out the window.
When he was done, he tied off the condom and dumped it in the bin as I settled next to him and we rode the rest of the way to the hotel in silence. West was pissed at me and he had a fucking good reason to be. He'd treated me with nothing but respect, trusted me with his deepest secret, put himself out there to be with me and I just fucked him like the men I used to throw away like trash.
I knew I was a mean bitch, but I'd just graduated to shameful and spineless. For the first time since I'd started my sex-capades...I actually felt dirty.
I didn't wait for the hotel room door to slam closed behind me as I began stripping, leaving a trail of clothes behind me as I bolted for the bathroom. I need to scrub myself clean, I needed to get it off my skin. Right then, I actually hated myself. I hated the person I'd become, I hated the measures I took to protect myself. Most of all, I hated that I'd used West.
Grabbing the bathroom door, I swung it hard, intending to shut West out, but he thumped his hand against it before it could close and came in after me. I didn't have the guts to look him in the eye. He'd pulled off his own clothes and the only thing I could look at was his semi-erect cock as he backed me into the shower screen. Cool glass pressed against my naked back as West's arms caged me in like the wild animal I was.
"That was a revenge fuck," he murmured. "Wasn't it?"
"So what?" I asked, finally raising my gaze to meet his.
"You can't fuck me like that again. We're here to explore the possibility of more, Blair. I'm not trying to buy your affection. I want it to be real."
Real. I wasn't sure if I was capable of real when it came to relationships. Put on a mask, play a part, fuck 'till I was raw. That was my game and I played it well. I didn't like being at the bottom of that pile.
"It's okay to want more," he said when I didn't move. "It's okay to want it with me. It's okay to be afraid."
"You could've stopped me," I said darkly, pressing my breasts against his hard chest.
"Fuck, B. The moment you touch my dick I become a fucking animal. Do you realize how much power you have over me?"
Despite how filthy and pathetic I was feeling, my pussy clenched at the thought of owning Jake West. We'd fucked so many times, but I hadn't had enough. This right here was our MO. Fighting and fucking.
He reached around me and turned on the shower, testing the water with his hand. When the room began to fill with steam, he guided me under the pounding stream, pushing my hair away from my face.
"I don't know what I need to do to get you to see it," he murmured, water beading across his skin, "but this is just between you and me. It has nothing to do with the band, or my money, or my fame. It's just you and me."
"I'm sorry," I whispered, blinking as water trickled over my face. "I'm freaking out if you didn't notice."
"B…" He pressed his forehead against mine, strong arms holding me tightly against his body. It was truth time. If I couldn't do this then there was no hope for this thing to work out between us. It would be over before it really started.
"I don't know if I can handle your life. I was nothing. I was nobody. Everyone wants you. I'm afraid I'm not enough for all of this."
"I know it's hard," he said, his expression twisting into something I couldn't fathom. "We're both learning, but we need to do it together."
"How are you so calm about this?"
"Fuck, I'm freaking out just as much as you are, beautiful."
"I don't believe you." West was always so calm, so strong. He was a man who knew exactly what he wanted and he took it. I couldn't even imagine what he would've been like at rock bottom.
"I want you to be mine," he said, gazing down at me through heavy lids. "Whatever it takes."
Fuck, I'd already taken the biggest step of my entire life by agreeing to come with him on tour. That was like working up the guts to jump off a cliff. I'd fucking jumped right off the edge, but still hadn't landed. I was currently in free fall.
Tracing his lips with a trembling hand, I said, "I'm here, aren't I?"
West let out a strangled moan and covered my mouth with his, plunging his tongue deep inside. His cock began to stiffen even more against my stomach as I kissed him back. We'd done this so many times before, fucked each other’s mouths, touched every intimate part of our bodies…but that had been with lust filled desire. This time, I found myself kissing him with everything that was inside me and that included the dangerous thing that was growing in my heart.
As if he could feel it, West slowed the kiss down, teasing me with soft deep strokes of his tongue, taking me with an unusual amount of tenderness. His hands cupped my face, when he could have so easily gone for the sweet spot in between my legs and he stood still, when normally he would have pressed his cock into my clit. I let out a deep moan into his mouth, the simplicity of our embrace turning me on more than anything in my entire fucked up life.
The bathroom stall of some club, the backseat of a car, a random guy's house, the dark corner of a park…hard and fast. Bruising, raw, animalistic. That was what got me off until this very moment. West genuinely cared and it made me wetter than I'd ever been. I needed him to make me come.
"Blair," he breathed, pulling away. His hands dropped from my face and skimmed over my arms, but he still wasn't touching me where I needed him.
"I need you inside me," I said, guiding his hands to my breasts and rubbing up against the underside of his cock.
"I can't, not in the shower," he groaned, beginning to plump my breasts in his hands. "I don't have any protection and I can't let you go."
"I trust you," I said, hooking my leg around his waist. And I did, I trusted him and if I wasn't so desperate for him to be inside me, I would've clamped my m
outh shut, got dressed and bolted out the door and off into the sunset. But that was the old Blair, the new one was fucking insane as they came.
West's eyes widened and his touch became gentler, his hands trailing over my breasts, down my waist and over my ass. He wasn't a fuckwit, he knew exactly what this meant. Lifting me up, he positioned the tip of his cock against my folds and pushed the head just inside. A shudder rippled through his body and my pussy clenched around him in response. I'd never let a man inside me without protection before. Even though I took other precautions, I'd never been close enough with someone to allow it. Now that I'd reached the point of no return, I felt everything begin to shift between us. I'd been fighting it every step of the way, afraid I'd lose what little of myself I had, but I couldn't deny it anymore.
I'd fallen completely and utterly for Jake fucking West. This was no longer just about the sex.
He slid his cock all the way inside, our pelvis' joining, his balls pressing against my ass and when his tip hit the deepest part of me, I moaned in pleasure, capturing his mouth with mine. We were truly skin on skin, as physically connected as we could ever be and I'd said it a million times before, I loved West's cock inside me, but riding him bare was explosive.
"I can't-" West began, his breath catching as I clenched around his length. "I won't last."
"Then move," I said, rolling my hips forward, "and don't stop."
He began to stroke in and out, and almost immediately, I felt an orgasm building inside me, bubbling to the surface in unbearable waves. I heard myself pleading with him to make me come, to push me over the edge, to give me the thing I craved. I'd never been so vulnerable in my entire life and even though I wanted it, it still scared the absolute fuck out of me. West had pulled off the last of my prickly exterior, the facade I'd worked so hard to maintain and just blew it right the fuck out of the water.
"Fuck," he grunted. "You feel...fuck."
"Please," I whimpered against his shoulder. "Come in me, West."
He quickened his pace, thrusting into me hard, our skin slapping together as the water from the shower beat onto our writhing bodies. I began to come, clenching around his cock, grinding my hips faster into his onslaught and he fell over the edge with me, spilling hot and hard into my pussy and I didn't care. It felt too fucking good to give two craps about.