The squeezing and the need to push fade away. Tears stream down my cheeks. “Oh my God! Hurry, before it starts again. I won’t be able to stop myself again.”
Kyle takes the washcloth and wipes my tears away. “You can do this, Al. I have faith in you. Our daughter needs you right now. Control yourself for her.”
The massive pressure builds again. I squeeze Kyle’s hand. “Jesus, Kyle, it hurts not to push. You did this to me. I hate you! I hate you so much, you fucking bastard! You better never come near me again. I’ll fucking kill you!” I scream as the pain wracks my body.
The doctor finally sets me free as he says, “Okay, Mrs. Stevens, the cord is free. You can push now.”
I let my body do what I’ve stopped it from and feel relief immediately. Then the urge passes. I breathe in several times and then feel the tightness begin again. I push as soon as the urge hits me. Suddenly I feel a relief and hear a cry.
“You did it, Alyssa. She’s here,” Kyle says softly to me as he leans down to kiss my forehead.
“Mr. Stevens, would you like to cut the umbilical cord?” the doctor asks him.
He looks at me. “You okay?”
I manage to nod weakly. He lets my hand go and goes to the end of the bed. I lay my head back. I’m exhausted.
How in the hell do women do this shit over and over again?
“Look who I have here, Momma,” Kyle says as he walks back up to my side, holding a red-faced, little, wrinkly, black-haired thing.
He puts her on my chest and I raise my arms to hold her. “So you’re Junior. You just about made me hate my husband,” I say.
Kyle laughs. “Not ‘just about.’ I’m pretty sure you’ve hated me for the last few hours.”
I smile at him, then look back at the little human we created. “Thank you, Kyle. Thank you for this. She’s precious.”
A nurse wearing scrubs with baby ducks all over the shirt comes into my view. “We need to take the baby for a little while, to make sure she’s fine.”
Kyle takes the little, wrinkly, red baby and hands her to the nurse. “Bye, Kyla. See you soon,” he says.
My heart fills up with so much love for him. “I love you, Kyle. I’m sorry I turned into a super bitch.”
“You weren’t a super bitch, Al. You were just a big, wimpy baby,” he teases me.
“A big baby? Watch yourself, boy.”
His sky blues eyes twinkle and he moves closer to me. “Can I give my wife a kiss?”
“You need permission now?” I ask him.
“Oh, I wouldn’t dare touch you without permission,” he says with a grin.
I manage a smile. “Yes, Kyle, you can kiss your wife.”
His lips touch mine softly. My heart beats hard in my chest. I move my hand up to pull him to me, kissing him harder.
He pulls away slowly. “I love you, Alyssa Stevens.”
“Time to get up, Alyssa,” a smooth, velvety voice whispers in my ear.
I open my eyes to see emerald green eyes looking down into mine. “Good morning, Eden.”
I’m wrapped in his arms as he looks down at me. “I had to wake you up. I was getting a little uncomfortable with your dream.”
I drop my eyes. “I’m sorry, Eden.”
“No need to apologize. It’s not your fault,” Eden tells me, then he gets up out of bed.
I pick up my phone and call Laura again. It goes straight to voice mail. It’s still early. Maybe she’s still mad. I decide to get up and get dressed. My body hurts. I can’t tell if it’s from my dream, or if Eden and I got too rough with each other last night.
I meet Eden downstairs. He and Kyle are eating muffins. “Good morning,” I call out to them as I enter the kitchen.
Kyle smiles at me, then looks at Eden. “I don’t envy you being the father of her children and having to be with her through all that. She wasn’t very pleasant to deal with during the delivery of the baby. I can still feel the pain in my hand from her squeezing it,” Kyle tells him.
Eden’s eyebrows raise. “Can you really feel that?”
Kyle nods. “Unfortunately, the answer is yes. That’s going to be a problem if this continues.”
“Kyle, those feelings are not real. You have to come to terms with that,” I say as I go to sit on the stool at the breakfast bar with them. I wince when I try to sit down.
Damn it! It hurts so bad!
“Not so fast, Alyssa,” Eden stops me. “Let’s get you to the sofa.”
“The dreams aren’t real,” I say as Eden and Kyle help me to half-sit, half-lay on the sofa. “Kyle, we have to stop giving in to these feelings.”
“Are you finding it so easy to do?” Eden asks me.
“No, it isn’t easy, but it has to be done. That life might have been one we would’ve had, but then again, it might be a figment of my imagination,” I say as I move a pillow under my aching ass.
Damn, this is insane!
Kyle looks at me, then sits next to me, searching my eyes for answers I don’t have. “How could I have the same dreams then?”
I take his hand in mine, stroking his knuckles with my thumb. “I’ve no idea. Nothing which has happened to me in the last few months can be logically explained. Perhaps it’s just my dreams and you’re picking up on them telepathically.”
He pulls my hand up to his chest, placing it on his heart. “Then why do I feel like this? Why does it hurt that I can’t hold that little girl right now? I miss her and want to see her again. I want to go back to sleep and back to that world.”
I reposition myself on the sofa, my ass is aching and my stomach sore. “Eden woke me up when we kissed. Is that where the dream ended for you?”
He lets my hand go and looks away. “Yes, I woke up too.” He runs a hand through his blonde curls. “Maybe we shouldn’t talk about our dreams at all.”
“I don’t know,” Eden says. “Maybe they should be discussed. Things should never go ignored. We wouldn’t resolve anything if we ignored things and hoped they’d go away.”
Kyle is so close to me. His leg touches mine and I have to fight the urge to reach for him. I want to be wrapped up in his arms and feel the comfort I know is there. “I don’t think there’s much for us to discuss. Kyle was there, I was there, and even you were there for all but one of the dreams. No need to talk about it too.”
His hand touches my arm and my eyes shoot to his. Kyle sees what his presence is doing to me and gets up, moving away from me. “We don’t have to talk about them if it bothers you, Al.”
I watch him move clear across the room. “I hope it doesn’t hurt you, Kyle, but it makes me feel bad that I’m cheating on my husband in my dreams. I don’t ever want to hurt Eden. He’s everything to me.”
Eden comes to my side and sits in the spot Kyle vacated. His hand runs up and down my arm, making me grow warm inside. “Alyssa, you have no control over this. I don’t want for you to feel bad about it. Just like anything else in life, I would hope you’d embrace it and learn everything you can from it.”
I look up at him. “You’re crazy mature, Eden. I wouldn’t be so open to this if it was you dreaming about being married to someone else.”
The no-nonsense expression he wears makes me feel worse somehow as he says, “How would you change it?”
How would I?
Placing my hand on top of his, I stop him from moving it over my arm. I take his hand and place it on my stomach. “I couldn’t, could I?”
His eyes move to look at his hand lying on my flat stomach. “Acceptance is the key to moving forward with life and learning all you can as you go along the way. You’ve been given a gift. You get to see what could have been. Explore that. Not many people get to.”
Kyle sits in the chair across from us. “Dude, that sounds wise.”
I laugh at his words. “Yeah, he’s wise and exceptionally good natured. We should all strive to be a little more like him.”
Then Eden goes and acts so unlike himself, I feel as if I’m in another world
. His hand goes up, he leans towards Kyle, and the two bump fists. “It’s crazy, guy! Like, as long as I touch my mate, I can see the dream and it’s real. But I’m like a spectator. That baby was so cute!”
My eyes go wide and I look at my husband. “Eden?”
He looks back at me and grins. “She was.” Then his eyes move to Kyle. “Alyssa was pretty cranky through the whole thing. I’ll make sure she has plenty of pain killers when she and I have our children.”
Kyle laughs and rubs his hand. “Hell, yeah, guy. As much as they’ll allow.”
I groan as I pull myself up to a sitting position, which hurts, but I can’t take these jokers anymore. “Let either one of you feel that horrible pain and I bet you’d be cussing like a sailor and throwing things at the person who got you in that spot. I think I handled it all pretty well, considering how many times I thought about doing some pretty bad things to you, Kyle.”
He smiles at me with that million-dollar grin. “I am aware of all you thought, even in the dream world, Al. Choke me?”
I nod and get up slowly and painfully.
I will not be wanting to experience real childbirth anytime soon!
“Okay, let’s lighten this up, then, shall we?” I say. “I need to call Laura’s mother to see if she went home.”
The phone rings several times before Laura’s mother answers it. “Hello.”
“Hi, Mrs. Tanner. This is Ally.”
“Is everything all right?”
“Why do you ask that?” I ask her.
“It’s awfully early and Laura hasn’t called me in two days.”
“Oh, I see. I was hoping you’d heard from her. She and Kyle got into a little argument and she left. I thought she might be on her way back home.”
“How would she get here? Did you send her on that plane?”
“No, she took her car.”
“What car?” she asks.
“Oh, we gave her a car. Don’t worry. I’m sure she’ll cool off today and come back, or call, or something. I just wanted to be sure she wasn’t up there before we started looking for her around here.”
“You gave her a car?” she asks.
“Yes, I’m sure she wants to tell you all about that. If she calls you, please let me know.”
“You do the same for me.”
“Yes ma’am, I will. Talk to you soon,” I say, and then hang up.
“Not there either, huh?” Kyle asks me.
I shake my head. “Let’s give her until this evening. If we don’t hear from her, we can figure out what else we need to do. She can be really stubborn.”
Kyle looks distracted, yet not all that concerned, as he says, “You know her best.”
I watch for his reaction as I say, “No matter how mad she is, or why, she’ll realize she can’t just turn her back on us. It’ll just take her some time, I guess.”
Eden rises and moves towards me. “Alyssa, maybe you should take a ride around town and see if you can find her car at a motel or something. If you can find her, you can talk her into calming down and coming back.”
“Alone?” I ask him.
“You have the GPS system. You’ll be fine,” Kyle says. “Go look for her, Alyssa.”
I head up the stairs to get my things. “Okay, then. I’ll grab my purse and keys and see you two later. I might stop and pick up some steaks or something to cook later.”
CHAPTER 66
ALYSSA
I drop the top on my BMW. The air feels cool and crisp. I’ve not driven the car very much at all. I turn up my radio and breathe in the fresh air. The pine trees that line the driveway give off an aroma that makes me feel at home, just like they do back in Cloudcroft. It’s hard to believe such a small amount of time has passed since we were there.
A small motel sign pops up as I drive down the road. It’s not far from the house. I pull into the parking lot, but her car isn’t there. I drive further down the road and find another little motel, but her car isn’t here either.
What is up with her? Why is she so mad? How can she do this to Kyle?
A small grocery store is up ahead. I pull into the parking lot. It’s such a small town that I decide I can leave the top down on the car as I run in. The small store has a pretty good meat market. I find several steaks quickly, then get some potatoes to bake and some fresh green beans.
“Will that be all for you today?” the lady at the cash register asks me.
“Yes, thank you,” I answer her.
I look out the glass front of the building and see a police car driving slowly as it passes behind my car. “Can I ask you something?” I ask the lady.
“Yes,” she answers.
“Do you happen to know the sheriff?”
“He’s my uncle,” she tells me.
“Oh! Then it is safe to say he’s a stand-up kind of person, right?” I ask, not believing how small this town is.
“He’s the best. Why do you ask?” she asks me.
“He was just driving by my car. Just being curious,” I answer her.
She looks out the glass wall. “That’s a nice car. He was probably just admiring it,” she says.
I smile at her. “I’m sure that’s it. Thanks,” I say as I walk away from her.
I drive through the little town, looking for Laura’s car. I notice the same police car turns out onto the road behind me. It follows me for three blocks. I decide I should go back to the house. I’m careful to follow all of the speed limits and use my turn signals. The damn sheriff stays some ways behind me all the way back tp the house. Just as I turn into the driveway and push the code on the gate to open it, the lights on the police car turn on.
The gates open. I want to drive in and close them behind me, but I’m a little bit afraid to. The sheriff gets out of his car and walks up to the side of my car. He seems to be purposely taking his time before he tells me why he’s bothering me.
“Sir, can you tell me why you’re stopping me?” I ask him.
Pulling down his dark sunglasses, he glares at me. “I’ll ask the questions, young lady.”
I turn my head to look forward. “Okay, then, what questions do you have for me?”
“Can you understand me? I will ask you the questions. Now be quiet,” he says.
I close my eyes. I just remembered Kyle told him my name is Kat. If he wants to see my driver’s license, he’ll know it’s not the truth and that won’t be good. Not good at all. I picture Kyle’s face in my mind and then call his name out in my head. I open my eyes and look at the gate.
“I need you to step out of the car,” the sheriff tells me.
I turn to look at him. “Why?”
“I’ll tell you only once more. I need you to step out of the car,” he says, then puts his hand on his gun, which hangs on a belt around his waist.
I laugh at his actions. “You must be crazy. You can’t pull a gun on me just because I won’t do what you say. You’ve not given me any reason as to why you’ve even pulled up behind me.”
I hear Kyle’s truck start up from the garage. It’s loud. To my surprise, the sheriff moves his hand off of the gun. He moves away from my car and goes back toward his.
“I’ll let this go for now, missy,” he says, and then gets into his car and pulls away before Kyle can make it all the way out to us.
I pull through the gates as Kyle’s truck comes into sight. I see that he’s alone in the truck. I drive past him and motion for him to follow me. I pull up in front of the house and he pulls back into the garage. I walk into the front door with my bag of groceries.
Eden meets me at the door. “What the hell happened? Kyle said he heard you calling him and saw the front entrance in his head. What is that about?”
Before I can answer him, Kyle walks into the side door from the garage. “Did I see a police car driving off, Al?”
“A police car?” Eden asks.
“The sheriff followed me out here and then turned on his lights just as I pulled into the driveway. I did nothing
wrong. I felt like he was going to try and take me in or something. I pictured Kyle in my head and called to him. I didn’t call to you, Eden, because I couldn’t have you in danger of being taken into custody,” I tell them.
“You did the right thing, Al,” Kyle tells me.
“I thought so. I was taking a gamble it would even work,” I tell him.
Eden unpacks the bag of groceries and says, “Maybe you should try to telecommunicate with Laura.”
“I can try. I’ll go up to our bedroom and try to concentrate. I bought steaks for you guys to cook out on the grill later this evening. Can you put this stuff up while I go try to communicate with her?”
I go upstairs to our bedroom and lay down on the bed. I see Laura’s face in my head. I call her name over and over again in my mind. I can’t hear anything back. I can’t be sure this is working.
I have to stop myself from thinking about how it might not work. I sit up and hold my hands up to my head. I try to see her face again. An image of her with tears streaming down her face comes into focus. I open my eyes, then get up and run down the stairs.
“I saw her with tears streaming down her face. I think it’s time to ask for help,” I say. “We need to ask our security team to find her.”
Eden stands up and takes out his cell phone as he walks out the back door to make the call. I look over at Kyle. “She will get over this. She’s really madder at herself than at you,” I enlighten him.
“I doubt that, Al,” he says, sadly.
Eden comes back in. “You won’t believe this.”
“What?” Kyle and I ask at the same time.
“Her car has a tracking device. I should’ve thought about that before, but I didn’t. Anyway, she’s right down the road. You won’t believe where,” he says.
“Eden, just tell us,” I say.
“Sheriff Hardy’s house,” he tells us.
“How can that be?” I ask.
Kyle stands up. “I’ll go get her. You two stay here.”
“Wait, Kyle. One of our security guys works in Austin as a bodyguard for the governor. He’s coming out to take care of the situation,” Eden tells him.
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