Disappointment surged through Ruby. Tears clogged the back of her throat. She would not cry in front of him. No, she didn’t want a baby. Her sisters were having babies. She wanted to be a bounty hunter, didn’t she? But the thought of having, Deke’s baby…
No, she didn’t want a baby. So, why was she suddenly feeling sad that she wasn’t pregnant? Why was she suddenly seeing images of their child?
“Anyway, I thought you would want to know.”
“Thanks,” he said. “We’ll stop at the sheriff’s office and drop off the body.”
“Yeah,” she said, suddenly unsure as to what would happen next. She didn’t want Deke to leave, but why would he stay? What was keeping him here with her? And should she tell him that she loved him?
“What are you going to do next?” she asked.
He reached up and felt the bandage on his head. “I’m going home.”
The dog poked her head out of the sling to make certain everything was okay. He stroked her ears, and she went back to sleep.
Ruby bit her lip. She didn’t want him to leave, but they had not talked about the two of them. The memory of him telling her he wasn’t getting married returned and she swallowed. They didn’t have to get married…but she knew her sisters would insist if they found out they had shared a bed.
“That makes two of us,” she said quietly, wishing with all her heart he would stay with her.
As they rode into town, she felt so uncertain about everything, except the fact that she didn’t want Deke to leave. She didn’t know what she wanted with the man, but she loved him, probably always had.
Thirty minutes after they arrived at the sheriff’s office, they were on their way to the farm. The deputy had taken the body and recorded the bounty, but her brother-in-law Zach had taken Meg to the farm.
Oh boy, that meant they were all gathered at the homestead, and Ruby knew there would be hell to pay for not returning with Caroline.
*
Deke knew he couldn’t stay; yet, he couldn’t leave either. He couldn’t ride off until he made certain Ruby was safe. That she and Hannah were settled at the farm until after Annabelle had the baby. Then he would no longer be responsible for Ruby when he rode away.
The woman was a walking disaster waiting to happen. And he didn’t envy the sisters’ job of trying to keep her at home and out of trouble. It couldn’t be easy.
When they rode up into the yard, the front door of the farmhouse flew open and both sisters came out. Annabelle was swollen with child, and Deke knew her time would soon come. He said a small prayer she’d live through the delivery of the baby.
Meg was barely showing. Yet, looking at both women, his heart wrenched with sorrow for Laura and his child. Could he ever look at a pregnant woman again without feeling his body explode with pain?
“Ruby McKenzie, you are going to worry all of us into an early grave,” Meg said, beating Annabelle to their sister’s side.
Ruby swung her leg over the saddle, jumped down, and gave her older sister a hug. “Meg, you look so pretty. And the baby, oh my God, you’re showing.”
A glow came over Meg’s face as she smiled. “I felt her move the other day. We’re so excited.” Her brows drew together in a frown. “Don’t change the subject. We’ve been worried sick about you.”
Deke felt lonely as he watched the women. Sure, he had a home, his mother, and even an older brother, but nothing like what these women shared. Some families were close, some were not, and his just happened to fall in the not-so-close category.
Annabelle waddled out and stared at her youngest sister. “If you didn’t make it home before this baby was born, I was going to send out a search party.” She glanced up at Deke. “Thank you so much for watching over her.”
“I did a lousy job,” he said. “She’s a tough one to keep under control.”
“That’s why we like you, Deke Culver. You tell it like it is,” Meg said with a smile.
“Everyone, this is Hannah. She’s going to be staying with us for a while,” Ruby said.
“Just until I can find a decent job and get on my feet,” the young woman said.
“Welcome,” Meg said. “But don’t be expecting much in the way of a job in Zenith. I’m surprised Ruby didn’t warn you about how hard it is to find decent employment here.”
“I’m going to help Hannah,” Ruby said.
Deke kept his thoughts to himself about exactly how Ruby intended to help the younger woman. No woman should be subjected to what Hannah had experienced in her life. Ruby would help her find a new way.
“Why don’t you all come in?” Annabelle said.
“Did you get Rivera?” Meg asked, looking at Deke and then Ruby.
“Yes, he’s dead,” Ruby said. “I killed him.”
Zach came out the door. “I hope it was in self-defense.”
A zing of aggravation crawled up Deke’s spine. He knew this was Ruby’s brother-in-law the sheriff, but still the woman he loved would never intentionally kill someone who didn’t deserve to die.
Deke took off his hat. “He was going to kill me. Ruby shot him.”
Annabelle put a hand to her back. “I need to go sit down. Come in and tell us what happened. You too, Hannah. Come in and rest.”
“I…are you sure? I could sleep in the barn,” Hannah said quietly.
Ruby took Hannah by the arm. “Nonsense. You’ll stay in my room with me. If I could sleep with Annabelle for all those years, I can sleep with you in there.”
“But…” Hannah said, and Deke knew what she was thinking. The girl still thought of herself as a tainted woman, but that was pure hogwash. She’d done what she had to, to survive.
“Hannah, your new life begins today. Forget the past,” Ruby said.
“Thanks, Ruby, but I can’t forget the past,” Hannah said and walked with them into the house.
Chapter Fifteen
Deke sat through supper, his stomach churning, his nerves tense, knowing he had to get out of here. He couldn’t stay another minute. He couldn’t be there when Annabelle went into labor. He couldn’t see her go through all the agony, the pain, the suffering. He couldn’t take a chance he’d watch her die.
He walked out on the porch to get some air and stood staring up at the stars. If he could leave right now, he would.
Ruby stepped outside and linked her arm through his. “You seem restless. Is it seeing my pregnant sisters?”
She could read him so well. So, why wasn’t she asking about the two of them or had she just not gotten around to that question yet? How would she react when she learned he couldn’t be with her? No matter how much he loved her, they couldn’t be together. Any other woman would be pushing for forever. Why not Ruby?
“It’s hard,” he said with a sigh. “I’m praying with time it will get easier to look at women with child. I know not all pregnancies end badly, but right now it’s still painful to see.”
Every time he saw a woman’s swollen waistline, he remembered Laura’s happiness over expecting, her anticipation of the coming baby and then the painful memory of her death. Holding his dead infant son was something he struggled with every day. He’d been such a fool.
Ruby was silent as she gazed up at the stars. “I didn’t know Laura, but I’d think she’d want the best for you.”
Their friendship had grown into a comfortable companionship, but he’d never loved her, like he loved Ruby.
“She would have,” he said without hesitation. “She had a sweet, gentle soul.”
“Completely unlike me,” Ruby said wistfully. “I wish I could be more like her.”
Deke grabbed Ruby by the arms. “No,” he said vehemently. “You’re who you are for a reason. I love the way you’re adventurous, outgoing, dangerous, and fun. I love everything about you just the way you are, except you take reckless chances that frighten me.”
The words were out in the open. Those three little words he’d promised he would never say. He hadn’t meant to tell her his fee
lings. It could go nowhere, and yet, they’d felt so natural coming from off his lips.
There were so many things he loved about Ruby, and he didn’t want to compare her and Laura. It wouldn’t be fair to either woman. They were different, and yet, he cared about both women. Ruby had secured his heart when she was just a young girl; only, he’d buried those feelings for years. Like the first rattle out of the box, she’d touched his heart and soul in ways that brought back the yearning he’d felt for that pretty young girl.
Silence filled the air. Ruby lifted her hand and caressed the side of his face. “I love you, Deke. I think I’ve been in love with you from the moment I first laid my eyes on you. I even tried not to love you this time.”
His heart swelled with emotion, and sweetness flowed through his veins. If only he could return the feelings, but he declined the notion to let himself even consider the emotion. Yes, he loved Ruby, but he didn’t deserve to love again. One woman was buried because of his reckless selfishness; he refused to endanger another woman.
Pulling her into his arms, his hands came around her. “I should have married you all those years ago before I tied the knot with Laura.”
Ruby shook her head. “No, we weren’t ready. You had to marry Laura, and I had to go bounty hunting with my sisters. We both had things in life to accomplish before we found each other again.”
Deke felt his chest ache like someone had reached in, grabbed his heart, and was trying to yank it from his body. Ruby deserved so much more than Deke. He was a broken man who’d made a mistake and left his pregnant wife alone to catch one more bounty. Happiness was something he didn’t deserve.
And Ruby…good Lord, the woman was danger walking with a target strapped to her back. Sooner or later, some angry outlaw would send a bullet her direction.
“Deke, I wasn’t certain how you felt.” Ruby trailed her hand down his face, pulling his lips to hers. “I love you.”
His mouth covered hers, and with his kiss, he poured his heart and soul into his caress. Plundering her mouth, he took possession, kissing her with all the passion he felt. He loved her. He’d loved her for years, but he couldn’t be with her. He couldn’t take the chance of killing her like he’d killed Laura.
He kissed Ruby like he would never kiss her again, needing and wanting her, quivering with the need to carry her away to the barn, but refusing. They weren’t taking another chance of her getting pregnant. They’d gotten lucky the first two times; he wasn’t risking a third time.
He broke off the kiss, his breathing heavy and restrictive. “You better go back inside. I’m going to bed down in the barn tonight.”
She gazed at him in the moonlight. “I’ll see you in the morning.”
“Good night, Ruby,” he said and opened the door, pushing her inside before his willpower was completely devoid of strength. As he closed the door, he felt his chest shatter with pain. He’d never see the woman he loved again.
No, he wouldn’t be here in the morning. He’d be traveling, searching for his next bounty. Chances were there was a bullet with his name on it.
*
The next morning, Ruby awakened to a quiet house. Annabelle was normally the first one out of bed. She’d collect the eggs and often have breakfast on the table by the time everyone had risen.
“Ruby,” Hannah said.
“You can sleep in,” Ruby said.
Hannah sat up in bed. “No, I need to talk to you.”
Ruby glanced over at the young girl, her auburn hair flowing around her shoulders. She looked so innocent and young. How she’d survived living in a brothel, Ruby could only guess. Now Hannah was free to choose her own life.
“Okay, what’s wrong?” Ruby asked, pulling her boots on.
“Nothing is wrong. I appreciate everything you’ve done for me, but I don’t think your sisters would approve of me being here if they knew I was a soiled dove.”
If Hannah went searching for another job in a saloon, taking risky chances with cowboys, then Ruby knew she’d be right. But Hannah had not chosen the life that was thrust upon her and Ruby’s sisters were open-minded enough they would do everything they could to help the girl.
“Well, Meg no longer lives here, and Annabelle is about the kindest person I know if you don’t say anything negative about her husband or her sisters. I can tell them if it will make you feel better, but they’re not going to care. They’re going to be glad we got you out of that saloon.”
Hannah sighed. “I just don’t want to upset them.”
Ruby placed her hands on her hips and stared at Hannah. “Meg tied her husband up naked in the middle of Main Street and left him. It’s going to take a lot to hurt their sensibilities. You just need to concentrate on you. No hurry. Just think about what you’re going to do with your life.”
Meg was a fiery redhead, and once she learned Hannah’s story, it would be a wonder she didn’t ride out and find the stepfather and turn him in herself. No, Ruby’s sisters would not care about Hannah’s past. They would be concentrating on her future.
Hannah smiled. “That’s the other thing I wanted to talk to you about. I want you to teach me how to shoot. I want to become a bounty hunter.”
Ruby stared at the young woman. “You’re not planning on going back to Hide Town, are you? You wouldn’t be thinking about revenge, would you?”
Returning to the ruthless outlaw town would be the worst thing Hannah could do. They would love the opportunity to kill her. They wanted her silenced.
“Not unless they cross my path,” Hannah said. “Then I could be tempted to kill my stepfather.”
“Hannah, I’ll do everything I can to train you to become a bounty hunter, but I can’t condone you going after someone to kill them. A good bounty hunter does not take the law into her own hands.”
“Isn’t that how you felt about Rivera?”
Ruby stopped as pain gripped her middle and squeezed her heart. The memory of her father’s killer was an ugly remembrance of agony that had almost cost Deke’s life was well as her father’s. “Yes, but I would have brought him into the law if he hadn’t put a gun to your head and tried to shoot Deke. I would never shoot someone with the idea that I wanted to kill them.”
When they’d first started hunting, Meg had drilled into Ruby the importance of letting the law do its job, not seeking retribution, but allowing the law to render the punishment, so real criminals were put behind bars.
“That’s the way I feel about my stepfather.”
“Promise me you’ll stay away from Hide Town,” Ruby said with a frown. She felt concerned that the girl would return and get herself either killed or be taken back into prostitution, until they could dispose of her. Ruby didn’t want that for Hannah.
“I promise to be the best student you’ve had. I want to learn how to shoot and hunt for criminals like you. I promise not to kill unless I’m forced to, to defend my life.”
“You’re the only student I have for now.” Ruby stood and gazed at the young woman. It wasn’t exactly what she’d asked for, but maybe she was just excited. “Okay, we’ll get started later today. But now, I’m going to go collect the eggs before Annabelle this morning.”
“Thanks, Ruby. I owe you so much,” Hannah said.
“Get some rest,” Ruby said, walking out the door.
Ruby hurried through the quiet house, eager to collect the eggs, and see Deke. She still hated the chickens, but at least she was no longer afraid of the silly birds. She shoved them out of the way, and they had finally learned to respect her.
Besides sneaking out early, she could kiss Deke good morning and maybe even talk to him about their plans. She wanted to continue bounty hunting, but would he? There were so many small details to work out…including marriage. He’d said he was never marrying again, but that was before they fell in love.
Shooing them out of their roost, Ruby collected the eggs from the hens. Once she’d finished, she opened the barn doors, wondering why Deke had yet to come out. Usual
ly he was an early riser.
When she entered the barn, she saw his horse was missing from the stall and realized Deke was gone. Sometime during the night, he’d fled.
“You bastard!” she said, sinking to the ground, her heart wrenched with pain, her chest feeling like someone had hit her smack in the ribs, knocking the air from her lungs.
Deke had said he loved her, and then he’d left like a thief in the middle of the night. Not once but twice, he’d made a complete fool of her. Not once but twice, he’d spurned her love. There wouldn’t be a third time.
*
Hannah picked up the pistol Ruby handed her.
“Okay, Ladies, we’re going to start off just learning how your body should be lined up before you fire.” A thrill of excitement went through Ruby. She was teaching two young women how to protect themselves and how to earn a living without depending on a man, and she was giving them both self-respect. She couldn’t help but smile. This could be the start of a great opportunity for Ruby to pass on the knowledge she’d learned hunting criminals.
Ruby twisted Hannah into the stance she wanted her in and then lifted her arm to point the pistol. “Don’t close your eyes when you line up the sight of the gun with the target or squeeze the trigger. Line up the pistol, take a deep breath, hold it, and slowly squeeze the trigger.”
Wrapping her arms around Hannah’s body, she lined her up and then squeezed the trigger. The bullet slammed into the dirt. “Okay, that’s not a bad first attempt. Now, we’re going to repeat that process at least twenty times today. When you finally hit the tin can sitting on the fence, we’ll stop for the day.”
“Okay, Caroline, it’s your turn. You’ve had practice firing before, but your shots are not very precise. I want you to knock as many cans off the fence as you can. And don’t close your eyes. Aim, hold your breath, and look down the gun barrel to your target.”
Caroline frowned and turned toward Ruby and Hannah, her gun in her hand, pointed at them. They both hit the ground.
“Confound it, Caroline, watch where you’re pointing that thing. I want to live to see my new niece or nephew,” Ruby said, standing and moving Caroline’s arm away.
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