by Anne Fraser
As they talked they headed out of the airport, pausing only to pick up their bags. They had cleared Immigration when they’d first arrived in Brazil.
‘And how is Camilla?’ Kendrick asked. ‘Sounds to me as if you two have come to some sort of understanding.’
‘You could say that. Katie has Mother eating out of her hand. The only problem is that she’s insisting that she’ll never be called Grandmother.’
Kendrick came to a halt. ‘Are you …? Is Katie …?’
Fabio grinned. There was no mistaking the happiness in his eyes. Elizabeth’s heart twisted. What would it be like to be loved like that? To know that you were the centre of someone’s universe? Once, she too had thought the future was all mapped out and that only happiness lay ahead. How soon it had turned to dust. She shook the thought away. Hopefully life would be kinder to Fabio and his Katie.
‘Yes, she’s just over eight weeks pregnant. Don’t say anything, though. She’s a little superstitious about it.’
Elizabeth’s heart twisted again. She too remembered the excitement of being pregnant the first time but it hadn’t crossed her mind to be anxious and she’d been totally unprepared for having a child with a terminal illness. Not that she would have not had Charlie in her life.
She was scared to death about this pregnancy, but this time she’d be prepared. She’d arranged for an appointment at the hospital in a couple of weeks’ time. This time, if there was anything wrong with her child, at least she’d be prepared.
‘I thought you could stay with us at the house,’ Fabio was saying. ‘I hope that’s okay. Mama has invited half of the Brazilian population as well as most of the film world to the reception so accommodation is booked solid on the island. Fortunately, she’s accepted that it’s only close friends at the actual wedding service.’
As they pulled up in front of the house a woman ran down the steps to meet them. After a resounding kiss from Fabio, she turned to them.
‘Hi, I’m Katie. It’s so good to meet you again, Kendrick.’
‘Me too, ma’am. This is Elizabeth.’
Katie took one of Elizabeth’s arms in hers. ‘Come, you must be exhausted. I’ll show you to your room.’ She turned around briefly. ‘Be a darling, Fabio, and take the bags up to the room for our guests.’
Katie was beautiful and the added light in her eyes made her seem to glow. She was petite, only coming to Elizabeth’s shoulder.
‘Congratulations,’ Elizabeth said as they walked up the sweeping staircase. ‘You look very happy.’
‘I’ve never been happier,’ Katie said simply. She showed Elizabeth into a bedroom that was at least twice the size of her sitting room back in England. She walked over to the window and flung the shutters wide.
‘We keep them closed during the day to keep the heat out. But it seems a shame to block out the view,’ Katie said.
And it was some view, Elizabeth had to admit as she stepped out onto a small balcony. The beach was only a few metres away and the sea rolled gently onto the sugar-white sand.
‘I wasn’t sure, but do you and Kendrick want to share?’ Katie asked, her grey eyes looking anxious. ‘There’s another room along the passage Kendrick could have.’
Elizabeth smiled. ‘No, this will do perfectly.’ Her heart thumped. Another couple of days and then it would be over.
‘I’ll leave you to freshen up. After lunch I’m afraid I’m going to have to leave you in Kendrick’s hands. There’s still so much to do before tomorrow. More guests—people from the practice where Fabio and I work are arriving this evening. Fabio’s mother has arranged a barbecue for everyone tonight, so I’ll see you there.’ And then in a flurry Katie was gone.
She had just left when there was a tap on the door and Kendrick entered.
‘Okay?’ he asked.
‘I’m fine. It’s so beautiful here.’
‘Fabio is a lucky man,’ Kendrick said. ‘Things haven’t always been easy for him.’
‘Why?’
Kendrick took her by the arm and they went out onto the balcony. Elizabeth rested her back against his chest, savouring the feeling of his arms around her, wanting to make the most of every last minute they had together.
‘He hasn’t always got along with his mother. Remember I told you about his parents on the plane out here?’
When Kendrick had told her that Fabio’s parents were Camilla Salvatore and Tom Lineham, Elizabeth had immediately known who they were. Tom Lineham, although dead for many years, was still a legend.
‘Fabio’s childhood was pretty isolated. I never thought he’d fall in love and settle down. His relationship with his father—my mother’s brother—was fraught even before my uncle died. A bit like mine with my father.’
He rested his chin on the top of her head. ‘Speaking of which, I’m seriously considering going back to the army.’
Elizabeth’s blood ran cold. It was one thing her making plans for a future without him, quite another to hear him doing the same. She only prayed he wouldn’t be going back to the front line.
‘If you do, will you go back to active service?’ she asked.
‘I’m not sure. At this stage, it’s only tentative. I haven’t said yes—yet. I’d like to train other pilots. But once I’m back in the army they can send me where they like. And anyway,’ he said thoughtfully, ‘I don’t know if I could train pilots without flying with them on missions.’
This was worse than anything she’d expected. Over the time she’d watched Kendrick work, she’d come to realise that he managed the risks and while the stunts were still dangerous, at least they were carried out in controlled conditions with her close by to help if she were needed. Out there, there was no way to control the risk. She swallowed the lump in her throat. She wouldn’t say anything. What was the point? Kendrick had made it clear that he didn’t want the responsibility of worrying about someone else and she knew instinctively that he wasn’t the kind of man to change his mind once it was made up. Maybe it was for the best they were never going to see each other again. She couldn’t bear the thought of someone else she loved dying.
‘Fabio wants me to go and play polo with him this afternoon. Would you like to come and watch?’
Elizabeth shook her head. She needed time alone so she could absorb what Kendrick had just told her. Fixing a smile on her face, she turned in his arms and pulled his head down towards hers. ‘What time is lunch?’ she asked.
Kendrick glanced at his watch behind her back. ‘Not for another hour.’
‘In that case,’ she whispered, raising her mouth to his, ‘I think we have just enough time.’
After lunch Kendrick headed out with Fabio. The memory of Elizabeth in his arms made him smile. Then he frowned. There had been something desperate in their love-making this time, something urgent, as if she had been trying to memorise every line and plane of his body. She didn’t know yet, of course, that this wasn’t goodbye. For a moment, when he’d told her about possibly going back to the army, he’d been tempted to propose, to tell her that he wouldn’t go unless she could go too, but he’d held back, not wanting to spoil his planned proposal.
There was no time to think too much about it as shortly after they reached the polo field they were mounted and, on the opposing team from his cousin, soon immersed in their game.
Later, after they had showered and the other players had gone, Kendrick decided to share his plans with Fabio.
‘You’re not the only one who’s going to get married,’ Kendrick said. The look on his cousin’s face was priceless.
Fabio slapped him on the back. ‘Why didn’t you say before? I would have congratulated Elizabeth.’
‘She doesn’t know. Not yet. I’m going to spring it on her tomorrow. After your wedding. I didn’t want to steal your thunder. I’ve done that too many times in the past.’
Fabio grinned back. ‘I think the score is pretty even, mate. Although you’re bound to catch up soon. I don’t go surfing and BASE jumping so much a
ny more. I’ve somehow lost the urge. Falling in love and becoming a father tends to do that. I kind of realise that I can’t take the risks we used to. I have responsibilities now.’
He grinned again and although Kendrick had never thought he’d hear the word ‘responsibility’ uttered by Fabio with a smile, he knew how his cousin felt. Was it fair to be thinking of proposing to Elizabeth if he might go back to the front line? He had the uneasy feeling it wasn’t. He only hoped she would understand.
CHAPTER TWELVE
IT WAS a perfect day for a wedding, Elizabeth thought as she stepped out onto the balcony. Kendrick was still sleeping, his arms and legs splayed out in careless abandon.
It had been late when he’d come back last night and he had crept into bed quietly so as not to wake her. He wasn’t to know that she had been staring wide-eyed at the ceiling until she’d heard his footsteps outside the door. For once she’d pretended to be asleep. She hadn’t been able to bear him to read the truth in her eyes.
A cool breeze rustled the palm trees. One more day and they would be saying goodbye. She was flying back to London to see her obstetrician.
She shivered and hearing footsteps behind her turned to see Kendrick, completely comfortable in his nakedness, coming towards her. Wrapping his arms around her, he hugged her close. ‘You’re cold,’ he said. ‘Come back to bed so I can warm you.’
But even as she gave herself up to him, she wondered if she’d ever feel warm again.
The wedding was a simple affair but no less moving for that. The bride wore a simple dress in a gauzy, almost diaphanous material with her hair in a chignon. The groom was in a white shirt and white linen trousers.
The service was held under a palm tree on the beach in front of Camilla’s home. True to form, the groom’s mother sniffed her way through the service. As the bride’s father was no longer alive, Kendrick gave her away to Fabio. The permanent grin on his face was even wider, if that was possible.
As Katie and Fabio made their vows to each other, Elizabeth had to blink tears away. The couple were so much in love and had the rest of their lives together.
Elizabeth’s mind strayed to the life growing inside her. In a different world the couple standing before her could have been Kendrick and herself, the baby growing inside her a source of happiness and joy, instead of fear and anxiety. At that moment she knew. She had to tell Kendrick. Whatever she decided to do, he had the right to know.
After the photographs and the toasts everyone made their way back to the house where the wedding feast was to be held. After that there would be dancing and the couple would be leaving for the airport. Apparently they were to honeymoon in Istanbul, a city that had special meaning for them.
As Elizabeth was about to follow the other guests back to the house, Kendrick appeared by her side.
‘Elizabeth, will you walk with me?’ The unusually formal language and the out-of-character nervousness on his face made her wonder.
‘Sure,’ she said, and as he took her hand in his she let herself be led along the beach. They walked in silence. Several times Kendrick opened his mouth as if to say something, then closed it again. Suddenly Elizabeth had had enough. She had to tell him now. Before she lost her courage.
‘I’m pregnant, Kendrick,’ she blurted.
‘Pregnant?’ He seemed stunned.
Oh, my God. This was harder than she’d expected. Deep down, she wanted him to be happy, to be delirious. To love them both.
She turned to face him, her eyes searching his. If only she could see a glimmer of joy in his face, if only …
Then his mouth split into a wide grin. ‘Pregnant? When, how, what …?’ His hand reached over and gently rubbed her stomach. ‘We’re having a baby?’
Elizabeth nodded.
The look of wonder in his eyes almost ripped her in two. ‘That’s great, Lizzie.’ He picked her up in his arms and whirled her round.
Then, to her amazement, he dropped to one knee and looked up at her.
‘I feel like such an idiot down here.’
He looked so woebegone that Elizabeth swallowed the bubble of laughter that rose to her throat.
‘Elizabeth Morgan,’ Kendrick said, taking her hand, ‘would you do me the very great honour of becoming my wife?’ He rose to his feet and smacked the sand off his trousers. ‘Sorry. Can’t do the kneeling thing. Doesn’t do it for me. There’s only one way to do this that feels right.’
He dropped his hands to her waist and she swayed towards him. He looked her directly in the eye and she saw hope and fear and love there.
‘I love you. I never thought I’d say that, but I do. I want you to be my wife.’
She knew what she wanted to say, but she couldn’t. Had he only proposed because she was pregnant? What if he walked away, like Simon, leaving her on her own? She couldn’t go through all that again. She simply wasn’t strong enough.
He was waiting for her answer.
‘No, Kendrick, I’m sorry, I can’t.’
He frowned. Clearly her reply wasn’t what he was expecting. ‘What do you mean, you can’t? You love me, don’t you?’
Elizabeth ran a hand across his face. ‘I don’t think you realise what the implications of this pregnancy are. This baby—our baby—might be born with the same condition that my darling Charlie had. Can you cope with that?’ She dropped her hand, tears welling in her throat.
Kendrick’s fingers bit into her shoulders. His eyes burned into hers. ‘I’m not Simon. I’ll never be like Simon—you have to believe me, Lizzie. You mean more to me than my own life—and if our child is less than perfect, we’ll see it through. Together. I promise you that.’
She wanted so much to believe him. Wasn’t love about trust? Elizabeth wrapped her arms around his neck and he hugged her with such ferocity she thought he’d never let her go. Then he was kissing her, sweet, desperate kisses. So this was what real love felt like.
Nevertheless, although it broke her in two, she knew what she had to do. She pulled away.
‘Love you, Kendrick?’ She made herself frown. ‘I thought I made it clear from the start that this wasn’t going to end in happy-ever-after?’
He laughed harshly. ‘That was then. We both said things but that was before we knew we were going to fall in love.’
There was a glint in his eye, the beginning of a hardness she couldn’t bear to see. But she knew she had to twist the knife one more time.
‘I’m not in love. And I suspect you aren’t, either. Not really. You’re thinking of going back to the army after all. You decided to do that without talking to me. Don’t you think, Kendrick, that was a decision you should have discussed with the woman you purport to love?’
His eyes narrowed. The smile was gone. ‘So that’s what this is about,’ he said softly. ‘Me going back to the army. Maybe I should have talked to you first,’ he said, ‘but I’m used to making my own decisions. It’s a habit. I’ll get used to consulting with you in time.’
Elizabeth stepped back. ‘I’m sorry, Kendrick. I don’t know what gave you the idea I could marry you. And if you think I’m going to wait at home, worrying that you might get killed, you have another think coming.’
‘So that’s what this is about, Lizzie.’ The darkness in his eyes cleared. ‘I’m an idiot. Of course, given what happened with Charlie, you’re bound to be more worried about me. But don’t you know by now? I can look after myself.’
She reached across and opened the button of his cotton shirt. She found the bullethole and circled it with her finger. ‘Like you looked after yourself then? You could have been killed that day. You have a death wish, Kendrick, and no one is going to get that out of you. Least of all me.’
Her throat was getting tighter and she could hardly bear to look him in the eyes. If he saw them, he would know she was lying.
‘I need to know if this baby has the slightest chance of having the same syndrome Charlie had,’ she said. ‘So, if you do love me, there is one thing you can do for me
. I have an appointment with a geneticist at a specialist children’s hospital. Meet me there. He’ll need a blood sample from you as the father. If, after having time to think about being a husband and a father to a possibly disabled child, and you decide that’s still what you want, we can talk again.’
‘I won’t change my mind, Lizzie,’ he said. ‘You should know me by now. I’d follow you back to England right now if I could, but I can’t. Philip needs me back in LA for a couple of days to review the film of the stunts, but after that, nothing will keep me away from you or our baby.’
Elizabeth wanted to believe him. If he’d proposed to her before she’d told him about the baby, perhaps she would have. Giving him a way out was the right thing to do. If, after time apart, he still wanted her and their baby, maybe she’d let herself trust in him.
She turned away. ‘I’m going back to the house, Kendrick. And from there I’m catching the first plane back to London. You take your time and think long and hard before deciding to come to London.’
He pulled her back into his arms.
‘I’ll be there, Lizzie. I promise.’
CHAPTER THIRTEEN
KENDRICK smiled. In a couple of days he’d be with Elizabeth and he was never going to leave her or their baby again. At least, not if he could help it. Sure, there would be times when he’d have to go away—he had to work—but he’d made sure the weeks after the baby was born he’d be free to spend every minute with his new wife and child.
If Elizabeth thought he would ever abandon his child, regardless of how it turned out, she didn’t know him. Not that he could blame her. Up until he’d fallen in love with Lizzie, a wife and child hadn’t figured in his plans. Now there wasn’t anything he wanted more.
They would get married as soon as possible. He didn’t care where, that was up to Elizabeth. They could get married on the moon if she wanted. He would spend the rest of his life making sure she had whatever she wanted. These last couple of weeks had been the longest of his life.