by Parker, Ali
And that sure as shit was not happening.
Quinn widened her eyes at me to urge me to talk.
“I don’t know what you want me to say,” I started off, which was true.
“How about you start by telling me what you four are planning for tonight?”
“Quinn.”
“I mean it. I want to know. I need to.”
I ran my fingers through my hair and slumped back against the sofa cushions. “Why?”
“Why?” she asked incredulously. Then she was on her feet and stabbing her finger toward my chest. “Because I’m sick of feeling like I have no control. I’m sick of being treated like a child. I’m fully capable of taking care of myself. I’ve been doing just fine for eight whole fucking months without you policing my entire life.” Her voice was almost a scream. Quinn swallowed. Tears clung to her bottom lashes.
I licked my lips. “I didn’t want you to feel like I abandoned you.”
“But you did,” she whispered.
I stood up too. “It wasn’t my intention, though.”
“Your intention was to run away.”
I shook my head and reached for her, but she pulled away. “No, it wasn’t. I went after Isaac. You know that. And I put him in the ground where he fucking belongs.”
“Months ago!”
I flinched.
Quinn pressed the heels of her hands to her temples in frustration. “You can skirt around it however much you like, Rhys, but the fact of the matter is, you could have come back. You could have chosen me. Max is fucking dead! He can’t stop you anymore. The only thing standing in the way of us being together is you. Do you know how much that hurts me?” A tear escaped and rolled down her cheek.
I couldn’t even look at her. Her grief made my insides hurt. “I know, Quinn.”
She let out a deep sigh and turned her back toward me. I gave her time to gather herself, and when she turned back, her tears had stopped. She walked around the coffee table, took my hands in hers, and made me sit down on the sofa with her. She licked her lips and met my eye. “You need to let me help you.”
“What? How?”
Quinn didn’t blink. She just stared at me with those bright hazel eyes of hers. “You need to tell me how Max died.”
I suddenly felt like I was being squeezed on all sides by invisible walls that inched closer and closer together. Soon, I wouldn’t be able to breathe.
“Rhys,” Quinn whispered. “Please talk to me. You can’t keep carrying this around by yourself, and I can’t be in the dark anymore. We both need to take this step. It’s been a long time coming. We can both handle it. Together.”
Her fingers grazed my still-healing knuckles. Was this it? Had I gone as far as I could keeping this to myself? Did I have any other choice but to come clean?
I could lie. I could keep doing what I’d been doing, but it clearly wasn’t working. Not for either of us.
I took a deep breath. “All right.”
“Yeah?” Quinn asked, her voice a little high pitched. Hopeful.
I nodded. “Yeah. Fuck, I don’t even know where to start.”
She bit the inside of her cheek. “I know you trailed Reed to the parking lot at Lincoln Park, right?”
“Yeah, at midnight. He had already killed Joseph and Dean three days earlier. I’d been looking for him for almost twenty-four hours straight. I was alone, but Max knew what I was up to. He tried to talk me out of it. I wouldn’t listen.”
Quinn’s fingers continued to roll gently over my knuckles. “Right. So you trailed him to the park. And you both got out of your cars?”
“Not right away. He sat in his truck for a good five minutes. I waited. I didn’t know what was taking him so long. Maybe he wanted me to make the first move. Maybe he was taunting me. I still don’t know. Your brother called me and asked where I was. I didn’t tell him.”
“But he found you anyway?”
I nodded. “He’d turned on the GPS on my phone. He wanted to keep tabs on me. Smart bastard.”
Quinn almost smiled. “He was protective like that. I would know.”
“Yeah, I guess you would. Anyway, Reed got out of his truck and so did I. I wasn’t thinking straight that night. I was so fucking mad. He’d killed seven of my boys by the time I caught up with him, and I knew if I didn’t stop him, more would follow. I couldn’t deal with that, Quinn. I needed to put him down. And if he came out on top, then so be it. At least I wouldn’t be around to watch more of my friends die.”
Quinn nodded. “I understand.”
“He taunted me. He was unarmed. So was I. I mean, I had a knife in my dashboard, but I didn’t plan on using it.”
She narrowed her eyes at me. “How were you going to kill him?”
“With my hands,” I said flatly.
Quinn didn’t say anything.
“I was too far gone with rage. I hadn’t even noticed there was a guy in his passenger seat. He had his brother with him. But I never knew about it until he and I got into it. I landed some hits, and as soon as I had the upper hand, his little brother jumped in, wailing on me. He knocked me out. I don’t know how long I was unconscious for.”
Quinn’s eyebrows were drawn together. She was clearly having a difficult time listening to all this, and I hadn’t even made it to the bad part yet. We were still on the prologue. Her fingers had fallen still as she sat in rapture and listened.
“When I came to, they’d propped me up against the wheel of his truck. Isaac had a knife. He put on a show with it, like he got off on the anticipation. I was disoriented, but I’d accepted my fate. I thought about you, actually.”
“What? Really?”
I shrugged. It was true. Quinn had been the only thing on my mind when I thought I was about to meet my end. I had thought about her so intensely I could smell her perfume. Telling her that hadn’t been part of the plan, but the words were out now, and there was no taking them back. “Yeah. I thought about you. I wished I’d spent more time with you. Said goodbye. Told you how I felt. Fuck.” I ran my hand down my face and shook my head.
Quinn pressed herself closer to me. Her knees rested against the outside of my leg, and she wrapped one arm around mine. “Keep going,” she whispered.
“They were about to gut me when headlights lit us up. Your brother pulled into the parking lot. I remember him walking over. He was fucking fearless. He walked toward us like he was walking through an aisle in a grocery store. Like it was something he did every fucking day. And he told them that he was going to kill them.”
Quinn’s hands started shaking. I closed mine overtop of hers on my arm. She closed her eyes and put her forehead against my shoulder.
“Turns out Isaac had a gun in the back of his jeans. He’d grabbed it from his truck while I was out, I guess. By the time I saw it, it was too late. I tried to warn Max, but I’d barely gotten a word out when Isaac pulled the gun on him and pointed it at his chest.”
Remembering the night in such vivid detail made my head ache. I’d spent the last eight months doing everything in my power to push these memories away, but it was impossible to forget something as horrific as watching my best friend get murdered.
I leaned forward, closed my eyes, and rubbed them with my fingertips. “Your brother never even flinched. He held his ground. He knew he was going to die. He looked right at me when I yelled for him. Then the gun went off, and Reed put a bullet right between his eyes. I watched him fall. It was like—like it all happened in slow motion. When his body hit the gravel, the brothers rushed back into their truck. Isaac was laughing. I think I was screaming. And then they drove off.”
Quinn wiped her eyes and didn’t look up at me. I didn’t expect her to.
“I sat there with him until the police arrived. They arrested me. I was taken away before your brother was moved, which made me sick. And then, well, you know the rest.”
Quinn sniffled. “I’m sorry.”
“Why?”
“That you had to go through th
at.”
“Go through it?” I asked, stunned. “Quinn, I was a fucking fool. I thought I could take on Reed all by myself. Your brother knew otherwise. And if I’d only fucking listened to him, he wouldn’t be dead right now. If I’d killed Reed when I had the chance—”
Quinn straightened and grabbed my face in her hands. She stared into my eyes and shook her head firmly. “No, this wasn’t your fault. None of it was. My brother died because Isaac Reed shot him. It could have easily been the other way around. I don’t blame you, Rhys. Nobody does.”
“I do.”
Her chin trembled, and she hung her head. “Then I forgive you.”
“How can you?”
She lifted her head. “I forgive you, Rhys. And it’s time to forgive yourself. The past is behind us. Max is gone. And if he could have done it over again, he would have made the same decisions. I know him. He wouldn’t have had any regrets. And he would think you were insane for blaming yourself for all of this. Do you believe me?”
“Quinn, it’s not that simple.”
“Do you believe me?” she asked again. Her eyes flicked back and forth between mine. “Do you really think I could love a man I believed was responsible for my brother’s death?”
I studied her. “No.”
“No. Exactly. So pay close attention, Rhys, because this next part is very important. I love you. I loved you then, and I loved you when you left, and I love you now.”
My body felt a thousand pounds lighter. I’d been carrying around tension in my shoulders and back that I hadn’t even noticed, and it completely evaporated when she said those three little words. The guilt morphed into something new, something manageable: acceptance. I couldn’t change what happened, but I could change how I handled it.
“I love you too,” I said.
Quinn smiled. Then she leaned in and kissed me. The kiss was wetter than usual from all the crying, but it was also sweet and tender and soft.
Her hands fell to her lap when our lips parted, and she tucked a couple loose strands of hair behind her ears. “I don’t know about you, but I definitely feel better.”
“Me too,” I said.
She nodded. “Good.”
“Kyle and his three asshole friends followed us from Chicago to here yesterday. When we got back, I sent Aiden after them to find where they were holed up. They’re in a motel not far from here. We’re going after them tonight.”
Quinn giggled. “Are we on an honesty streak now?”
“Why the fuck not?” I asked.
“I’m not complaining,” she said.
“I don’t want you or Nancy to have to worry about these guys anymore. They’re on my turf now. Well, Ryder’s turf. And the Lost Breed doesn’t tolerate scumbags like them.”
Quinn placed her finger against my lips. “Just shut up, and kiss me.”
Chapter 22
Quinn
Rhys’s honesty had made up for eight months of isolation. There would be more to work through—one conversation couldn’t fix all our issues—but that was definitely a good start. He’d shown that he trusted me, and he had finally let down the walls that he’d put up after Max was killed.
Based on everything he had just told me, I couldn’t blame him for not wanting to talk to anyone about it.
It had taken every ounce of willpower I possessed not to break down and cry while he told me what happened to Max.
I knew all along that he had been shot, of course. And I knew it happened at Lincoln Park in the parking lot just after midnight. But all the details were new. Learning that Max had gone there of his own free will seemed to make me feel better, too. He hadn’t been forced or even asked to go. He just went as per Max’s usual style.
All he ever wanted to do was help and protect his friends. And he’d achieved that. He saved Rhys’s life that night. I had no doubt in my mind about that. And that was something I would be eternally grateful to him for.
The man I loved was still alive because of my brother’s sacrifice. It didn’t make the grief any better, but it made choosing to be with Rhys an easy choice. It was like Max had saved him for me. Like he knew the sort of destruction Rhys’s death would have wreaked upon my heart.
Having everything out in the open made the kiss between me and Rhys feel even better than usual. I swung one leg over his waist and straddled him as our kiss deepened. Our tongues explored each other’s mouths with familiarity. He tasted like coffee.
Rhys trailed his hands up the inside of my sweater. I wasn’t wearing a bra. He cupped my breasts, and I sighed into his mouth.
This was a new kind of passion between us. What used to be wild, crazed, desperate fucking had slowed down. We were taking our time, as if we were feeling each other for the first time.
I rotated my hips in his lap, grinding against his crotch. He chuckled into my mouth as I felt his cock hardening through his jeans. I smiled as he pulled the bow of my drawstring apart.
“Owen and Nancy could come back any minute,” he said.
“They could.”
“And you don’t care?”
“Do you?” I asked, pulling my lips away from his to rain kisses down the side of his neck and back up to his ear. I pinched his earlobe gently between my teeth. “We can move to the bedroom. Or you can have me right here. I don’t care.”
“You’re for my eyes only,” he said.
And there it was. That ever-present alpha overprotectiveness of his. Why the fuck did it turn me on so much? I bit down harder on his earlobe. “You’re damn right I am.”
He rolled his hips beneath me and slid a hand inside my sweats. He rubbed me over my panties, and I continued rocking gently in his lap, feeling him growing harder and harder between my legs by the second. Somehow, I was always surprised at his size. I probably always would be.
My mind was still trying to make sense of everything he had told me, and I was desperately trying to silence it as he nudged my panties aside and drew one finger up and down my aching pussy.
Was everything going to change now? Would this conversation be the tipping point? Would we be able to really take a stab at this thing for real and stop trying to pretend we weren’t made for each other, all for my brother’s sake?
I didn’t know. And right now, it didn’t matter. Feeling his body against mine was the only thing I cared about.
I moaned as he slipped a finger inside of me. I continued to rock back and forth, grinding against his fingers, as he used his other hand to roll up my sweater and expose my tits. He plunged his face between them, his stubbled jaw tickling my skin, and then went from nipple to nipple. He swirled his tongue around them and pinched them gently before suckling on them. Then he moved to the other and showed it equal attention as I continued riding his finger.
I was getting wetter by the second.
Rhys eased another finger inside me.
I groaned and clung to his shoulders. My hips rocked and rotated of their own volition as my body took over and called all the shots. Pleasure rippled through me, pushing a contented sigh from my lips.
He was looking up at me and watching as I lifted my face toward the ceiling. It felt so fucking good. I never wanted the moment to end. I wanted to take our time, to indulge and spoil each other.
Then we heard a car door slam.
I froze. His fingers were still inside me, and my arms were wrapped around his shoulders. We both turned and looked at the front door. We heard voices.
“Hold on to me, baby,” Rhys said.
I hooked my legs around his waist as he stood. My pussy ached for him as he tightened his arms around me and carried me down the hall to his bedroom. He put me down on the bed as we heard the front door open, and then he hurried back to his bedroom door and closed it softly.
We heard Owen and Nancy’s voices out in the living room. They were laughing about something.
Rhys turned back to me with a cocky grin.
“What?” I asked, propping myself up on the bed on my elbows.
>
He licked his fingers clean. “Take those pants off.”
I bit down hard on my bottom lip as white-hot need burst apart inside me. Oh, fuck yes. I inched my sweats down my legs, little by little, and then took off my panties. Rhys watched and walked toward me like a hungry lion.
I slid closer to the edge of the bed and spread my legs for him. He went down to his knees at the end of the bed and stared up at me as I gazed back at him. Then he ran his tongue along my opening, and my eyes fluttered closed.
I let my head fall back to the bed. I marveled in the darkness behind my eyelids and focused on the delicious sensations between my legs. Rhys licked and flicked his tongue in all the right places. Long strokes were broken up by slow swirls around my clit, and then he would draw it between his lips and suck.
Hard.
I moaned and arched my back as he sucked and rolled his tongue over my swollen clit. I was going to come. I was seconds away.
He released me, and I sank back onto the bed. He chuckled and pressed his lips in soft kisses to the inside of my thighs. “Not yet, baby. Not yet.”
“I need to come.”
“You will. When my cock is inside you. I want to fuck that pretty pussy of yours and feel your juices as you come.”
I whimpered. He continued kissing my legs. He knew if he went back to eating me out, I would come right away. Once he brought me to that point, I hovered around it for minutes. Sometimes longer. My body ached, and every muscle was taut and ready for a release.
But he was going to make me wait.
I reached down to rub my clit. He caught my wrist and clicked his tongue. “Bad girl.”
“Please.”
“No.”
He stood up. I writhed on the bed as he undid his jeans and took them off. His shirt followed. I ravished him with my eyes as he stood there in nothing but his black boxers, looking like sin and sex. Then the boxers came off too. His cock reached upward to his navel, where dark hair swirled up his stomach and spread outward at his chest. He was one hell of a man.