by Carré White
“Just keep the lids on things. If they smell it, they might try to get in.”
“Are you serious, Matt?”
“Don’t look so worried.” He grinned. “We’re fine. Don’t take your boots off yet. I should show you where the privy is, and we gotta get some water.”
“Fine.”
He grasped a bucket from beside the stove, holding the lamp with the other hand. “You gotta get the door, darlin’.”
I held it open. “How far is the privy?”
“Not far.”
“I don’t think I want to come out here at night.”
“I’ll escort you, if it makes you feel better.”
“It does.”
It was strange beginning my married life talking about outhouses and bears, but what had I expected? When I had married Henry, we had danced into the night at our reception in the ballroom of a grand hotel. He had been the life of the party, regaling everyone with amusing stories, while gazing attentively at me. It had all been an act.
We wandered around the cabin, finding a small creek. “Oh, this is pretty.”
“It runs for quite a bit that way. There’s a spot for swimming down yonder. A small pond.”
“It’s probably freezing.”
“Yes, ma’am.” He pointed to a small structure that was crudely built. “You know what this is?”
“Yes, unfortunately.”
“I know, but…it serves its purpose.”
We took turns going inside. There was a large hook for the lantern and a bucket of corncobs in a corner. When I emerged, we strolled by the creek, although it was now fully dark.
“Are you hungry?” he asked.
“A little.”
“There’s some jerky and preserves. I’m goin’ fishing tomorrow.”
“Maria packed biscuits.”
“There’s some wine. It was a present from Nathan and Hannah.”
“Will you be able to drink it?”
“I’ll be fine.”
It was hard to ignore how I had first met him. I’ll never forget how he looked with bleary eyes, messy hair, and a face-full of unkempt beard. “I just don’t want to throw temptation your way, if it’s something that might get out of control.”
“I understand your concerns. I’ll have to prove to you that I ain’t a drunk. I’m not proud of how I was, but sometimes people go through tough times and they use whatever they can find to feel better. Whiskey was always available.”
We bent to wash our hands and faces in the water. “Did you hear that?”
He glanced at me. “What?”
“I thought I heard something. Maybe we should get back to the cabin.”
His hand held mine. “Good idea.”
“Are you sure there aren’t any Indians?”
“Well, they’ve been run off, Louisa. The Ute have been pushed further into the mountains. I reckon the Arapahoe and the Cheyenne won’t be around no more either pretty soon. The more miners and homesteaders that come out, the further these people gotta go to get away from us.”
“They’re being forced out.”
“Yeah, that too.” He looked grim.
“Did you ever see any Indians?”
“Lots of times.”
“And they didn’t hurt you?”
He sighed. “They just want to be left alone. Their way of life is threatened, and they have fought back. They’ve attacked too, but so have we.”
“But you weren’t attacked?”
“No.”
“It’s a sad state of affairs.”
“It is. We have better things to do tonight than worry over problems we have no control of.”
“That’s true.”
Once we reached the cabin, Matt brought in wood, starting a fire in a sturdy-looking stone enclosure. I sat with my legs tucked under a blanket watching him. He still wore the shirt and trousers from earlier today, and I had on the green dress. Wine was poured into matching tin cups. This was a far cry from the opulence of my first wedding, but it struck me as genuine, honest, and, when he turned to look at me, my belly erupted in tingles.
“You sure are pretty.”
“Thank you.”
He sat next to me, crossing his feet before him, being entirely at ease. “You’re not nervous, are you?”
“Why would I be nervous?” His grin was disarming. “Don’t look at me like that.”
“Like what?”
“Like you are now.”
“Would you like more wine?”
“I’m fine.” I gazed at the fire, while smaller branches snapped and popped. It created a cozy atmosphere, as light flickered against the walls. “It’s strange being so quiet.”
“The house is always noisy.”
“Too many kids.”
“Do you think it’s too many?”
“Not really.”
“We’re gonna add to the number soon, won’t we?”
That thought brought heat to my cheeks. “I suppose.”
“You want to, don’t you?”
“We probably should’ve discussed this earlier.”
“Didn’t have time. Was in a rush gettin’ ready for the wedding.”
“You looked handsome today.”
“Only today?” His smile was teasing.
“I like you better shaved like this.”
He touched his cheek. “What’s wrong with my mountain man look?”
“It’s scary.”
“It’s like the first time you saw me?”
“I suppose.”
“I’m sorry I made such a bad first impression. I had no idea my future wife would be at the door to save me.”
“I didn’t know I’d do that either.”
He touched my face. “You saved us all, Louisa.”
“Well, maybe you saved me too. I was prepared to be an old spinster. I had firmly resolved never to marry again.”
“You’re far too pretty to go to waste like that.”
I giggled, finding that amusing. He’d pulled out one of my hairpins, releasing a long curl. “What are you doing?”
“This looks uncomfortable.” Another pin came loose and then another.
“Sir,” I objected. “Someone spent a great deal of time arranging that.”
“Send me the bill.”
His breath held hints of wine; the aroma was intimately intoxicating. My fingers strayed to his necktie. “What about this?”
“You can loosen it, if you want.”
I pulled out the strip of linen that had been tied in a bow. “You should wear these more often.”
“That’s hardly practical on a farm.”
“Maybe for church.”
“I don’t go to church.”
“Will you now?” I wondered what his answer would be, because this was an important issue. I fully intended to take the children to church every Sunday.
“I’m about to bed my wife, and you want to talk religion?”
“Briefly.”
“We probably should’a talked about this earlier.”
“One of many things.”
He scratched his head, his expression pinched. “I’m not all that fond of Bible mills.”
“Is there a reason for that?”
“Is this gonna be a sticky point?”
“What?”
“Are you gonna make me go?”
“I can’t make anyone do anything, but I do plan on taking your children. It would be nice if you joined us.”
“Fine.”
“You’ll go with us?” He’d managed to surprise me again.
“Yes, now I don’t want to talk about this again tonight.”
“I won’t.”
His lips grazed my cheek, while his fingers drove through my hair, the silken strands falling down my back. “I’d rather kiss you.” His voice sounded husky. “I haven’t been able to stop thinking about that kiss in the hallway. You all but melted in my arms. I like that.”
“I did not.”
; “Oh, yeah you did, darlin’. I know a thing or two about women, and you were enjoying me plenty.”
“You think quite highly of your abilities in this area.”
“No! No more talkin’.”
His lips pressed against mine, the slinky wet feel of his tongue suddenly in my mouth. I most certainly did remember that first kiss, as it was unforgettable. I’d been lying in bed every night, dreaming of more of the same, and now…I could take as much as I wanted. He worked the buttons and hooks on the dress, loosening the material, while lowering the front over my corset. I’d closed my eyes, relishing the feeling of being this close to someone, this intimate. There was a drugging quality to the kisses, which sent quivers and trembles through me, leaving me throbbing with what I knew now was desire. If I had any doubts that we would not be compatible in this area, my body told me otherwise.
After we had undressed, with a blanket around us, I succumbed to every female need I’d ever dreamt of and more. It was a wondrous experience, and his gentleness and thoughtfulness were entirely appreciated. I lay in his arms after, spent and languid, basking not only in the fire, but the feel of him next to me. He was firm where I was soft, and hairy where I was smooth, but the differences were complementary. I traced the line of a muscle on his chest, feeling his heart beating beneath my finger.
“That was…really nice, Louisa.”
“It was better than I thought it would be.” I glanced at him. “Is it true that we’re only supposed to do this to have babies?”
His chest rumbled with laughter. “I hope not!”
“That’s what I was thinking. I’d like to…oh, never mind.” It was unseemly to think of such things, let alone voice them out loud.
“Honey, we can talk about anything, anything at all. It’s just us in this house and in our bedroom.”
“I didn’t think I would enjoy it, is all. I’m just surprised. I thought I’d be mortified being naked with someone else, especially when you…oh…you know.”
“We’re married. We’re legally bound in the eyes of the law and God, and I’m going to enjoy my wife, thank you very much. From the sound of it, you enjoyed yourself too.”
“I did.” I rested my head on his chest. “I’m so happy, Matt. I’ve made the right decision. I was a bit worried about things, but I can put those aside.”
“You had a right to worry. I was a mess when you met me. That was a bad first impression. If I had known my future wife was at the door, I swear, I would’ve at least brushed my hair.”
“You did look a fright,” I giggled.
“After I came back from the mountains and found out my kids were missin’, I about had a heart attack. Sally left a note sayin’ they were with the Weavers, and I hightailed it on over there as fast as I could. Then I found out her boyfriend had beat on ‘em. That was the worst day of my life. That was worse than when my wife died. I’ve never felt like more of a failure.”
I lifted myself on an elbow. “You couldn’t have known that something like that would happen. You had her watch them before, right?”
“Yeah.”
“Don’t be so hard on yourself. You went into the mountains to earn money for your family. You were able to come back and buy wood to build more furniture, so you could sell it. You did the best you could, Matt.”
“I still feel bad though. Real bad.”
“None of us are perfect. They forgive you. They love you.”
“Those kids mean the world to me. I want to give them a better life than what they had. You’re a part of that picture. You’re so good to them. You love ‘em just like they were your own.”
“I do.”
“I got lucky the day you knocked on my door. I don’t know what would’ve happened to me, if you hadn’t come along when you did.” His look was so sincere, it brought tears to my eyes. “Now I’ve made you cry.”
“I’m just so grateful. You saved me too. If I had kept my vow of never marrying again, I would’ve missed out on…this…on you.”
Our eyes met. “I could love you so easy.”
“I could too.”
He kissed my forehead. “You’re lovely naked.”
“So are you.”
“Let’s get some sleep, so we can…um…kiss a bit later.”
“I see,” I giggled. “That’s seems like a good plan.”
“Yes, ma’am, it is.”
The next morning, as I stood at the little window with the view of the woods, I held the blanket around me, thinking that the night had been magic. It wasn’t filled with fancy dishes and sparkling silverware or an orchestra; the magic had been in the joining of two people who belonged together, the fit as natural as a comfortable pair of shoes.
You did make the right decision.
I know.
No more doubts now?
No, none.
Arms went around me, as Matt pressed his lips to my neck. “What are you staring at out there?”
“Nothing really. Just my future.”
“You gotta use the privy?”
“No,” I laughed. “I didn’t mean that, you vexing man. I’m just happy is all. Really, really happy.”
“Do you want to know what I’m thinking?”
“What?”
“I’m starvin’. I hope you plan to get the stove going soon, cause I’m liable to start nibbling on you, which isn’t a half bad idea actually.”
“Fine, I’ll make breakfast.” I turned in his arms. “What do you want me to make?”
“Anything.” A heated look entered his eye, which I had grown to recognize. I pushed against his chest. “Oh, no. I’m going to make some food, then we…can, oh, never mind.”
His laughter filled the room.
The End
Epilogue
The sound of a wagon had my attention. “Oh, who is that?” I wiped my hands on an apron. Children giggled from above. They were supposed to be napping, but something had gone awry. I wasn’t expecting company today. Matt was in town, and I had stayed home to finish the chores. I reached the door just as my sister Hannah appeared. Matt, who had arrived at nearly the same time, followed her.
“Well, hello,” I said, smiling. “Fancy seeing you here.”
“Your husband followed me. I’ve come from town.” She eyed the room, which had just been painted blue. “It’s nice. I like the color.”
“Thank you. I’m still looking for pictures. The walls need adornment.”
“I’ve got news!” She waved a letter before my face.
“Who’s it from?” I loved hearing family news; it was one of my favorite things.
“Fanny!”
Fanny was the youngest of the Hoffman sisters. “What does she say?” I spied my husband, as he waved. Then he went into the barn with a bundle of packages under his arms. I sat on the sofa with Hannah, who wore a pretty straw bonnet.
“You probably won't find this the least bit surprising, but she’s decided to join us in Denver City.”
“Mother and father can’t be far behind.”
She beamed. “I do believe they’re traveling together.”
My hand went to my mouth. “Oh, my goodness. No.”
“Yes, it’s true.”
“Look what we’ve done to our family? We should be ashamed.”
“They can’t bear to be so far from their grandchildren. I just wish they didn’t have to sell everything. I had high hopes for that piano and other things.” She looked wistful. “I guess the dishes Paulina brought will have to do.”
“They’ll bring the railroad out eventually.”
“That could take twenty years!”
“So what does the letter say?”
Matt’s boots clunked on the front porch, as he entered the house. He took his hat off. “Afternoon, ladies.”
“Hello, Mr. Montgomery.”
“I hope it’s good news.” He eyed the letter.
“Sit and listen,” I said. “It’s from my sister, Fanny. She’s planning on homesteading. She�
�s coming to Denver City.”
“Good lord. The place will be overrun with Hoffman sisters. It is already.”
“Stop that,” I chided. “Now what does it say?”
“Well, she’s been corresponding with someone from Denver City for quite some time. It seems they’ve grown closer over the months, and he’s asked to marry her!”
“Is she going to be a mail order bride?”
“I suppose, yes.”
“Is that wise?”
“Who’s the lucky fella?”
“Someone by the name of…” she scanned the letter…“Jason Hatch.”
“Jason Hatch?”
“Do you know him?”
“Yeah,” he laughed.
“What’s so funny?” Now I was worried on behalf of my sister. Fanny was the youngest, and we had always been protective of her. I’d hate to see her make an enormous mistake by marrying someone who wasn’t suitable.
“What else does the letter say?” asked Matthias.
“Just that he’s an eligible bachelor, he’s been single for ages, and that he’s looking for a wife.”
“It might just be he is.”
“Now you have me worried. Why are you laughing? What’s so funny?”
“Does it say anything about children in that letter?”
“Well, he wants to have them. That’s why he’s looking for a wife.”
Matt slapped his knee, grinning. “I see.”
I got to my feet. “Oh, this isn’t funny! What do you know that you’re not telling us?”
He eyed my belly, which was growing larger by the day. “Uh…well…he already has children.”
My mouth fell open. “What do you mean?”
“If it’s the same Jason Hatch we’re talkin’ about, he’s full up on children.”
“Then she must be referring to someone else,” said Hannah. “It states very clearly that he’s a bachelor, and I would assume that means he’s never been married.”
“Oh, that much is true. He’s never been married.”
“Then how could he possibly have children?”
“He got ‘em from his sister. She died last year.”
“Fanny really should know about this.” I worried for her now, not appreciating men who were less than truthful.
“This letter was misdirected, Louisa. It’s already more than three weeks old. She left New York the day she wrote it. She’s somewhere between Missouri and Denver City right now.”