by Morgana Best
Aunt Agnes shot me a look that showed she thought I was indulging in a false hope, but Aunt Maude seemed to think it was a good idea. “It doesn’t seem all that far-fetched to me, Valkyrie. After all, someone poisoned Agnes’s water, and poisoned Barnabas’s water, so it’s not much of a stretch to think they could put a substance in Lucas’s food or water.”
“What would anyone have to gain by making Lucas act out of character?” Aunt Agnes said. “And are there any drugs that can in fact make someone act so out of character?”
She addressed the latter to me, and I shrugged. “I don’t have a clue. Is there anyone we can ask?”
“Google,” Aunt Dorothy said automatically. “I’ll fetch my laptop.”
While Dorothy was out of the room fetching in her laptop, Aunt Agnes focused her attention on me. “I know you don’t want to think Lucas is a…” She appeared to be searching for the right words. “Not a nice person,” she said finally, “so don’t get your hopes up thinking has been drugged. While I admit it’s a possibility, it’s surely a remote one, and I can’t think of any reason why a murderer would be motivated to make Lucas act out of character.”
I tapped my head. “I’ve got it!” I said. “They don’t want him to investigate the murders, because he’s a Cleaner. If he’s acting all weird like this, he won’t be able to investigate the murders.”
The look on Aunt Agnes’s face showed she was entirely unconvinced.
Aunt Dorothy hurried back into the room with her laptop and placed it on the coffee table in front of her. She pulled the coffee table over to the biggest sofa and sat down. Maude and Agnes sat on either side of her, while I leant over her shoulder.
“What will I search?” Aunt Dorothy said, her fingers hovering over the keys. “I know.” She typed, Drugs that make someone act like a man whore and have bad taste in clothes.
Both Aunt Agnes and Aunt Maude groaned. “Dorothy, type in, Effects of recreational drugs.”
Fifteen minutes later, and we hadn’t made much progress. Hydrocodone caused vomiting and itching, PCP caused hallucinations and aggressive behaviour, and Ice—well, that was just plain scary. “Surely there must be one drug that makes Lucas act like he does,” I said in despair.
“Opium is an option,” Aunt Dorothy said cheerfully. “It does have a range of different symptoms, so I think we should put it on our list. Make a list, Valkyrie.”
I hurried over to the closest cedar sideboard, one of five in the room, and opened the top drawer, in which I found a pen and notepad. I returned to my position behind the sofa and made a note that opium was a possibility.
“Oh, look at this entry on ecstasy.” Aunt Dorothy tapped the screen, but since it was a touch screen, the page disappeared. It took Dorothy a few moments to find it again.
“It doesn’t sound like ecstasy at all,” Aunt Agnes said. “I’m sure Valkyrie didn’t mention Lucas was involuntarily clenching his teeth or having nausea or chills. Was there any mention of blurred vision or cramped muscles, Valkyrie? Dilated pupils? Dry mouth?”
“I didn’t see anything like that, although I couldn’t see his eyes because he was wearing those big dark glasses.”
Dorothy appeared affronted. “It does say the person becomes overly excited.”
“What about cocaine?” Aunt Maude said. “I don’t think it’s as addictive as other drugs, and as it’s part of the party scene, it fits with the way Lucas is behaving.”
Dorothy at once searched the symptoms of cocaine use. “Add the word orally ingested to your search,” Aunt Maude said.
Aunt Agnes muttered to herself. “That’s two words, and a terrible example of tautology.”
Thankfully, Maude did not argue with her, but stared at the screen. I leant over their shoulders and looked, too. It seemed that no one could agree on how someone would react to cocaine taken orally. We came across several forums, and there was no consensus of opinion.
Aunt Agnes turned around to me and raised her eyebrows. Turning back to the computer, she said, “I think this is a waste of time.”
Aunt Maude tapped her arm. “Do we have anything else to do? Besides, it might make Valkyrie feel better.”
Aunt Agnes looked over her shoulder and gave me a wide smile. “Of course. Forgive me, Valkyrie. I suppose you’re right, Maude. It won’t hurt to see if Lucas has been drugged.” She suddenly slammed her hand to her forehead. “Of course!”
“What is it?” Aunt Maude said.
“It would have to be a drug that was odourless, tasteless, and colourless,” Aunt Agnes said. “That should help us narrow it down, assuming there is a drug in the first place.” She shot Maude a look as she said it.
Maude disagreed. “Have you ever seen Lucas drink water?” Without waiting for an answer, she pressed on. “I’m almost certain the drug would have to be in his Witches’ Brew. That would disguise not only the colour, but also the taste and the smell.”
“Of course!” I said. “That makes perfect sense.”
Aunt Agnes crossed her arms over her chest and leant back on the sofa. “Well then, let’s say we find a few possible drugs. What are we going to do with that information?”
I was disheartened. I hadn’t thought about that.
Aunt Dorothy sat bolt upright and clasped her hands. “I know! We’ll send it to a lab.”
I was doubtful. “Are there any labs that do that sort of testing?”
“Google, Dorothy,” Aunt Maude encouraged her.
After five minutes of only turning up labs that tested blood or urine from people, Aunt Dorothy finally found a lab in Australia that would test food or drink for recreational drugs. “Look at that!” she said gleefully, this time pointing at the screen without touching it. “It tests for all these drugs; ecstasy, cocaine, opiates, amphetamine, ketamine, zolpidem, cannabis, steroids, methamphetamine, mephedrone, benzodiazepines, and methadone.”
I was hopeful for the first time that day. “How much is it, though?”
“It will test five drugs for one hundred and thirty five dollars,” Aunt Dorothy said triumphantly. “That’s a true shopping bargain, if ever I’ve heard one.”
“It depends on the five drugs,” Aunt Agnes said dryly. “They might be obscure ones.”
“No, it includes cocaine, the one we thought was the best possibility, as well as amphetamines, cannabis, methamphetamine, and benzodiazepines,” she said, “and if you want to test another drug, it’s an extra twenty five dollars for each one.”
“I hate to be a party pooper,” Aunt Agnes said in a tone that revealed she was quite happy to be a party pooper, “but how many weeks does it take to get the results back?”
Maude pushed Dorothy aside and peered at the screen. “It’s only seven days. That settles it.”
Aunt Agnes slumped in her seat. “All right then, I’m out-voted. We’ll just get a sample of Witches’ Brew from Lucas’s cottage and send it to the lab.”
She said it as if it were going to be an easy thing to do. “How do you propose we do that?” I asked her.
Aunt Agnes shrugged, but Aunt Maude piped up. “You go, Valkyrie, on the pretext of wanting to speak to him. Wear a big coat, one of the ones with deep pockets. There’s a cold wind outside—take one of the oilskins from the hooks at the back door. Just make sure it doesn’t have funnel-web spiders in the pockets.”
I thought she was joking, but the other aunts nodded solemnly. “Put it on the ground and stomp on the pockets,” Aunt Agnes said. “Redback spiders rarely get into pockets, but funnel-web spiders like to. Whatever you do, don’t put your hands in the pockets until you stomp on the oilskin.”
I broke into a cold sweat. Funnel-web spiders are one of the most deadly spiders in the world. While no one had actually died from a bite since the antivenom had been introduced in 1980, I sure didn’t want to get bitten by one.
“Don’t worry Valkyrie unnecessarily,” Aunt Agnes said sternly. “At any rate, Lucas isn’t at home yet. Anyone can see that his car is not outside.�
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I breathed a long sigh of relief. Aunt Agnes continued, “We’ll stand guard, Valkyrie, and the second we see his car coming, Dorothy will call you to give you time to get out, and Maude and I will delay him.”
“Okay, I’ll take the master key to the cottages. Oh!”
The aunts all looked at each other as realisation dawned on us. “How could I have been so stupid?” Aunt Agnes said. “We didn’t even tell the police about the master key.”
“I’d forgotten all about the master key until Valkyrie mentioned it just now,” Aunt Dorothy said.
Aunt Maude nodded. “Me, too.”
“Well, whoever copied the keys to the manor obviously made a copy of the master key, too,” Aunt Agnes said thoughtfully, tapping her chin. “After all, it hangs on one of the hooks under one of the oilskins. Now we know how the murderer got access to Barnabas’s cottage to poison his water.”
I bit my lip, also feeling foolish that we hadn’t thought of that before. “And if Lucas has been drugged, it shows how they gained access to his cottage as well.”
Both Maude and Dorothy agreed, but Aunt Agnes remained silent.
“So, what should I do? Is there a bottle I can pour some of the Witches’ Brew into?”
The aunts hurried into the kitchen by way of response, and we rummaged through the cupboards, searching for a bottle.
“I have a better idea,” Aunt Agnes said after a few moments. “Valkyrie, take a bottle of Witches’ Brew and simply swap it with his bottle. Just find an open bottle of Witches’ Brew, see how much is left in it, pour out a bit from your bottle and swap the bottles. What could be more simple?”
“You’ll have plenty of time.” Aunt Maude nodded as she spoke. “Like Agnes said, we’ll distract him, and make sure you have your phone in your pocket so Dorothy can call as soon as we see him. You’ll have plenty of time to make the swap.”
Aunt Agnes agreed. “It’s a foolproof plan—what could go wrong?”
CHAPTER 16
A unt Dorothy handed me the oilskin on which she had already jumped up and down to dispose of any funnel-web spiders hiding in the pockets. Aunt Agnes handed me an opened bottle of Witches’ Brew. Aunt Maude was already looking around the curtains to make sure Lucas didn’t come back.
“Now remember the plan,” Aunt Agnes said. “Is your phone on?”
I checked. “Yes, and the sound is turned up to maximum.”
Aunt Agnes nodded her approval. “Off you go, and remember not to sneak over there. There should not be anyone else out there, but if there is and they see you, it will just look like you’re going to Lucas’s cottage for a legitimate reason.”
I sure hoped she was right. I clutched the bottle of Witches’ Brew to me and walked outside. The wind was quite strong now, although the skies were blue. A gust blew some sand into my eyes. I put down the bottle and dabbed at my eyes with a tissue. I checked my phone, just to be on the safe side. I wasn’t cut out for the spy business.
By the time I reach Lucas’s cottage, which was only a short distance away, my stomach was churning and I had broken into a cold sweat. I opened the cottage gate, and walked along the pathway to the front door. Roses lined the pathway to his cottage, and the strong wind was already doing some damage. Petals lay strewn across the pathway. I looked down at the rose petals with regret. In another context, this could have been romantic, me walking along a petal-strewn pathway to Lucas’s door.
I shook my head and forced myself to walk on. I was careful not to make any sound, although why I bothered, I didn’t know. Lucas wasn’t home and there was no one else to hear me.
I put my left hand in my pocket for the master key and my right hand on the doorknob. Just then, my fingers touched something. I knew it was only the keys, but too late! Talk of funnel-web spiders had frightened me and I lurched forward into the door. It swung open. My first reaction was surprise that Lucas had left his door unlocked.
My second reaction was shock, because Lucas was sitting at the kitchen table, bending over his laptop. “Lucas!” I said.
He seemed just as surprised to see me. “Valkyrie! To what do I owe the pleasure?”
I was dumbstruck. Finally, I gathered my wits. “Sorry to barge in. I was about to knock, but I put my hand in my pocket and thought I touched a funnel-web spider.”
Lucas just sat there, his mouth open, and then he reached for the baseball cap and sunglasses sitting next to him and put them on. “A headache,” he explained. “I’m a bit light-sensitive at the moment.”
“Oh.” I didn’t know what else to say, but my annoyance at his behaviour got the better of me. “So, you’ve been having fun at one of the local motels.”
He left the table and walked around to face me. “Jealous?” He smirked at me.
I didn’t know how to respond, so I held out the bottle. “I’ve brought you some Witches’ Brew.”
“Thank you.” He reached for the bottle, but I snatched it back.
“How about I pour us a glass?”
He bit his lip. “I don’t have much time, so I have to decline.”
It was then I remembered his car wasn’t there. “Lucas, where did you park your car?”
He put his finger to his lips. “That’s a secret, Valkyrie. I didn’t want anyone to know I was home.”
“Because of the murders?”
He nodded. “I just have to shut down this computer and be on my way.”
I walked over to his fridge and opened the door. Sure enough, there was a bottle of Witches’ Brew in there. I glanced back at Lucas, but he was tapping away at his keyboard. I quickly swapped the bottles. I was fairly certain he hadn’t seen me. I didn’t have time to pour any of the contents out, so I hoped that Lucas would not remember that it wasn’t a full bottle.
I walked back over to him. “Lucas, are you feeling well?”
Lucas shut the laptop and stood up. “Why do you ask?”
“You’ve been acting very strangely lately.”
“Yes, I haven’t been myself.” He laughed. “Are you worried about me, Valkyrie?”
I glared at him. “You know I hate being called Valkyrie.”
He didn’t speak for a moment and then said, “Sorry, I wasn’t trying to be irritating.”
“Well, you succeeded,” I said.
He stepped over to me. “What can I do to make it up to you?”
He was close now, but instead of his usual musky scent of citrus and wood smoke, he reeked of cheap, floral aftershave. “You’ve even changed your aftershave!” I said, surprised.
Lucas took me by my shoulders. “I didn’t want to tell you this, but I’ve been having blackouts lately. Memory losses, if you will. I’m quite concerned about it.”
Relief hit me like a ton of bricks. “Oh Lucas,” I said, throwing my arms around his neck. “The aunts and I think someone has been drugging your Witches’ Brew.”
Lucas gave a little jump. “You’re kidding!”
I shook my head. “I saw you kissing a woman at the art gallery.”
Lucas held me away from him. “Please telling me you’re making that up.”
I shook my head. “And you stayed a few nights with a prostitute, next door to Linda’s motel room.”
Lucas made a strangled sound that seemed something like a laugh, but I expected it was a sound of remorse. He sat on the edge of the table and wiped his forehead with one hand. “It’s worse than I thought. You know, I can’t even remember your name. I really thought it was Valkyrie.”
I was deeply concerned. “Pepper.”
“Pepper,” he repeated. “Yes, that’s coming back to me now. Pepper, if you don’t mind me asking, what is the state of our relationship?”
I was deeply embarrassed. “Well, it’s, it’s like this…” I stammered.
Lucas interrupted me. “I’m sorry. I’ve embarrassed you. I take it our relationship is just starting?”
I averted my eyes, and nodded.
“I do remember kissing you. It’s all co
ming back to me.” With that, Lucas crossed to me in a few large strides, pulled me to him and kissed me. It was not how he usually kissed me, so I pushed him away. He at once pulled me back to him, and kissed me so roughly that I had to stomp on his foot to make him let me go.
“I don’t know what’s wrong with you, Lucas, but I’m going to find out,” I said. I hurried out his door with the bottle of Witches’ Brew and then sprinted all the way to the manor.
I hurried through the back door and bolted it behind me, just in case Lucas came after me. The aunts weren’t there, of course; they were still standing guard for Lucas at the front of the manor. Still clutching the bottle of Witches’ Brew, I hurried through the house. Aunt Agnes was the first to see me, and she called out to the other two. “Valkyrie is back!”
Aunt Agnes hurried over to me. “Is that his bottle?”
I nodded, and then burst into tears. Aunt Agnes put her arm around me and guided me into the living room, where she made me sit on an ancient, squeaky wingback chair upholstered in the most lumpy manner possible. “Tell us what happened?”
“Lucas was in his cottage,” I said.
The aunts exchanged glances. “But his car isn’t outside,” Aunt Dorothy said.
I shrugged. “He said he didn’t want anyone to know he was home,” I explained.
Aunt Maude patted me on the shoulder. “How did you manage to swap the bottles over?”
“It was easy.” I took the offered tissue from Aunt Dorothy and dabbed at my eyes. “He said he was shutting down his laptop and then leaving, so I sneaked behind him and swapped the bottles.”
“Did he see you?” Dorothy said.
I shook my head. “I don’t think so, but he told me he’s been having memory lapses. I told him I saw him kissing that woman, and I told him that he spent a few nights next door to Linda’s motel room with another woman.”
“And what did he have to say for himself?” Aunt Agnes asked angrily.
I sniffled into my tissue before speaking. “He seemed really surprised. He said he hasn’t been himself lately and he couldn’t even remember my name. He’s even wearing horrible, strong aftershave, the horrible cheap kind that makes you feel sick to the stomach when you smell it. And what’s more, he kissed me.”