by Laura DeLuca
Lainey shrugged, trying to act nonchalant. “Not as much as I did when I was younger, but sometimes—yeah. The charm bag has helped a lot though.”
Drew squeezed her hand. “Do these dreams have anything to do with your parents? With whatever happened to them?”
Lainey stiffened, startled. “Wow. That was intuitive.”
Drew shook his head. “Not really. It was an educated guess. You don’t have to talk about it if you don’t want to, but if you do, well ... I’ve been told I’m a good listener.”
Lainey picked up the bag and squeezed it between her fingers, wishing the infusion of herbs and stones within could still her memories as easily as they halted the dreams that used to leave her screaming in the night. As much as she hated rehashing the grief, her past was an important part of the woman she’d become. If she wanted this budding relationship to flourish, she had to allow Drew to explore her completely, even the dark corners.
“I was only five.” Lainey instinctively pulled the sheets a little tighter around her naked body, suddenly feeling much more exposed. “My parents were taking me to the mall to go clothes shopping. I was getting ready for kindergarten and I remember being so excited about starting school.”
Lainey squeezed her eyes closed in an effort to fight back the tears, but that only made the memory more vivid. She could see the tan interior of the four-door, smell the scent of new leather. Her parents’ voices were a dim background hum, lamenting over their baby girl growing up too fast. Lainey had grown groggy from the steady movements of the car and had trouble staying awake. Both the young girl of the past and the adult Lainey flinched when they heard the screech of tires, the clatter of metal against metal. The memory was so intense it made her gasp. She might have gotten lost in the past if Drew’s hand clutching her fingers hadn’t drawn her back.
“There was a guy in a truck on the other side of the road. He’d been drinking, and he swerved into our lane.” Lainey took a heavy breath to steady her voice. “At least that’s the story Nana—my grandmother—always told me. I’d fallen asleep, so I don’t remember much. The sound of the crash woke me up. I heard my dad shouting, saw him shaking my mother. Even with the blood running down his face I could tell he was crying, which meant something was horribly wrong. My mother ... s—she died on impact.”
Drew pressed his lips together in sympathy. “I’m so sorry.”
Lainey barely heard him, lost again in the memory of that terrible night. “The rest is blurry. I was so young and I had a concussion, but I think the car was smoking. I know my dad was afraid I was in danger. Even though he was hurt badly, he pulled himself from the car. When my seatbelt jammed, he used a pocketknife to cut me loose. The whole time I pushed him away ... reaching for my mom.”
Her voice caught. That part always got her—the guilt of denying her father her love in those moments when it mattered most. The fact that she was a terrified child working on instinct was no consolation. But Lainey didn’t allow herself to break down. She had to push her way through to the end. Best to get it over with as quickly as possible.
“Once he got me out, he carried me to the side of the road. The police got there a few minutes later. At the time, the flashing lights and blaring sirens only scared me more. They might’ve sedated me or I may have passed out because the last thing I remember was my dad trying so hard to console me. He stroked my cheek, rocked me, whispered in my ear, but I was too hysterical to listen. I don’t even remember what he said.” She took a long shaky breath. “That was the last time I saw him. He died in the hospital the next day from internal injuries.”
“Oh, Lainey,” Drew whispered. “That’s a terrible thing for anyone to go through, but especially a child.”
“Sometimes I really hate myself for being such a spoiled brat that day.” Lainey wiped a tear from her eye. “I’d give anything to go back, to cling to my dad and tell him how much I loved him. I’d already lost the opportunity to say goodbye to my mother. I had no control over that. But I was given a chance with my father, and after he probably hurt himself even worse trying to protect me ... I ... I must have broken his heart.”
Drew wrapped his arms around her, ignoring the tears that splashed against his bare chest. “You were a scared little girl, Lainey. I’m sure your dad knew how much you loved him. He still knows it.”
“I know that here.” She tapped her forehead. “But my heart still feels heavy from the guilt. It’s one of the things I’m working on. For so long, I lived in fear of everything. Just getting into a car took effort, even when I was a teenager.”
Drew gave her a small smile. “That doesn’t appear to be an issue any longer. Roller coasters and the Sling Shot are a heck of a lot scarier than SUVs and hatchbacks.”
Sniffing, Lainey grabbed a tissue from the nightstand to dab away her tears. “I may overcompensate a little these days,” she admitted. “Once I made the conscious decision to move forward, I refused to live my life in fear any longer. Later, when I embraced my spiritual path, it opened up new doors for me. Forgiving myself is the hardest challenge to overcome, but I’m getting there. One day at a time, as Sharon always reminds me. Some wounds take longer to heal.”
“You must be a remarkably strong woman to have gone through all this and still turned out so amazing,” Drew said, his arms enfolding her. “I admire you more than I can express.”
“I’ll tell you a secret,” Lainey confided. “I’m not nearly as fearless as I pretend to be. Take you for example. The Sling Shot is nothing compared to the idea of letting myself care about you when I know you’re going to leave. That is absolutely terrifying after everyone I loved in my family left me—even though they had no choice. Drew,” Lainey lifted her watery eyes. “I don’t want to have my heart broken again.”
Drew ran his fingers through his hair. She’d put him on the spot, but after the night they shared, it was a conversation that had to happen eventually. If she was nothing more than a vacation fling, she needed to know that now, before she invested any more of her heart, though she had a feeling it might already be too late.
“I wish I could swear I’d never hurt you,” Drew finally offered after taking a heavy breath. “But that’s unrealistic. What I can promise is if things are meant to be, when it’s time for me to leave, we’ll find a way to make it work. With today’s technology, any distance can be gapped. For now, let’s listen to Sharon’s words of wisdom and take this one day at a time, enjoy the stretch we have, and see where that leads us.”
Lainey nodded, impressed with his answer. “I guess that’s the most anyone can promise. So, what about you?” she asked, perking up a little. “Now that I’ve told you all my big secrets, I think it’s your turn.”
“Not much to tell,” Drew said, shifting his weight in the bed. “I told you my parents are back in Georgia. I had a pretty happy and uneventful childhood.”
“Then tell me, what really brings you here?” Lainey prodded. “What got you so spooked you had to run all the way to the other side of the country to get away from it?”
Drew was taken aback by her bluntness, but he recovered quickly. “I think I was just burned out. I was tired of being at the world’s beck and call.”
“Are lighting guys really that high in demand?” Lainey played with the ends of her hair. “I thought you pretty much played around with equipment. It’s not like the actual actors who can’t walk out their doors without being bombarded with paparazzi. I’d hate getting involved with all that drama, but your job sounds like it would actually be fun. Sort of the best of both worlds.”
“It used to be fun,” Drew admitted. “But somewhere along the way, I lost my muse.”
“And you came to South Jersey to find her?” Lainey chuckled. “Were you hoping Snookie would apply for the job?”
“You’re laughing, but I think I made the perfect choice.” Drew raised a hand to touch her hair. “After all, I’ve never been more inspired than I’ve been since I met you. Being with you reminds me o
f who I was and the things that mattered before I had a successful career.”
Feeling her heart melt and refusing to think about the future, Lainey allowed Drew to guide her back against the sheets. Still naked beneath the comforter, it didn’t take much effort to fall back into a passionate embrace that certainly felt divinely inspired.
Chapter Ten
On Monday, Drew was still coming down from what had to be the most magical weekend of his life. Lavish vacations, award ceremonies, red carpets—all those frivolities paled in comparison to spending a few days entwined in Lainey’s world ... and her arms. He’d been given a personal tour of the island by day and explored every inch of her luscious body by night—a body that actually had some meat on it compared to the anorexic actresses and models he’d dated in recent years. How nice it was to cup her solid buttocks in his hand, and to suckle a breast that wasn’t filled with silicone.
The one downside to the weekend was the occasional guilt pangs. Most of the time he forgot Andy Palmer existed when he was with Lainey, but then all of a sudden he’d feel a jolt, like a physical punch in the stomach, that reminded him how much of a jerk he was. Lainey had even given him the perfect opportunity to come clean. But how could he tell her about his silly issues after what she’d revealed? Lainey experienced something truly tragic. She’s spent most of her life as an orphan and probably had to struggle for everything she had. If Drew whined about his star status, he would’ve felt like an even bigger ass than he did keeping it a secret. Now the lies had gone on for so long, he had no idea how to make the big reveal without losing her altogether, especially when she’d stated more than once she wouldn’t enjoy the drama that followed a celebrity lifestyle. So he tried not to think about it and bided his time, waiting for the perfect moment to present itself.
That minor detail aside, everything had been flawless, but like all good things, the weekend came to a screeching halt with Monday’s arrival. Lainey had to head back to the office, and Drew couldn’t shirk his responsibilities forever either. Once he showered and fixed an espresso strength pot of coffee, he flipped on his laptop and turned on the video chat. The thought of it made his temples throb, but he’d told his agent to expect his transmission Monday morning at ten o’clock sharp. It was the only way to get Paulie off his back and keep his phone from ringing every five minutes. Drew still harbored the secret hope Paulie had missed the text message, but there was no such luck. The gruff man was signed on and had probably been staring at the monitor for an hour in anticipation of what he considered a long overdue conversation.
“Well, it’s about damn time. I think you’re trying to aggravate my bleeding ulcer.” Paulie’s thin lips pressed into a tight frown. “You know, Andy, running off like this was very unprofessional. You’re supposed to be an icon, a role model for young people everywhere, and you’re letting them all down. Do you have any idea what kind of rumors are spreading around town? People think you’re in rehab for Christ’s sake! It’s only a matter of time before your disappearance hits the tabloids and trust me buddy, it ain’t gonna be pretty.”
“Good to see you too, Paulie.” Drew took a sip of his coffee. “Your cheerful one-sided banter is always a pleasure.”
Paulie pointed an accusing finger at the screen. “Don’t get smart with me, Andy! I’m seriously pissed and righteously so. I took you on when you were a nobody lucky to get a hemorrhoid commercial, made you a star, and now you might as well be wiping that anti-inflammatory cream off your ass with our contract.”
Drew grunted. “Lovely visual.”
Paulie shook his head. “What’s gotten into you, kid?” he demanded. “Why the sudden vanishing act. Don’t you care about your career anymore?”
“It’s called a vacation, Paulie. Most normal people take them occasionally. You should try it sometime. It might loosen you up a little.”
“Vacations are planned in advance,” Paulie countered. “You split without even giving me a heads up and left me here trying to talk three big-time movie producers into giving you an extension. I’ve done everything but bend over and give them head, Andy. And what thanks do I get?”
“Sorry, but I’m not reciprocating that favor.”
“This is all a big joke to you, isn’t it?” Paulie raged, his face beet-red. “Well listen to this, funny guy. One of the movie studios has already pulled their offer. They’re giving the role to that guy who played the elf in those damn ring movies. So, I hope you’re happy.”
Drew shrugged, unconcerned. He took another sip of his coffee. “Good for him. He’s a nice guy.”
Paulie smacked himself in the forehead. “You’re completely missing my point, not to mention setting off my pace maker. I’m going to have a stroke because of you.” When Drew only stared at him, he sputtered, exasperated, and ran his fingers down his face before finally adding, “Did you at least read the scripts I gave you?”
Drew peeked over at his dresser where the screenplays sat in an untidy pile. He hadn’t read every word, but he’d flipped through them. While each one had a different title, the plots were almost eerily similar. Boy meets girl. Boy saves girl from certain death. Boy bangs girl. The end. Each was set in a different time period and one involved immortals, but they were all the same fluff he’d performed non-stop the last five years. Nothing about the scripts made him laugh or get teary-eyed. There was no mystery to solve, no amazing lessons learned. So what was the point? Of course, that wasn’t a question he could ask Paulie. Drew already knew his answer. With Paulie it was always about the bottom line.
Drew strummed his fingers along the table. “Which two are left and when do they start filming?”
“Ummm...” Paulie began flipping through the papers on his messy desk. “Seattle Nights is slotted for early December and Vampire Allure is tentatively scheduled for January, February at the latest.”
Drew cringed at the concept of playing a brooding, heartthrob vampire, but he couldn’t put his career on hold forever. At least with the paranormal flick he’d have more time to stick around New Jersey and get to know Lainey. He’d have to fly back and forth a few times in between, but there wouldn’t be any extensive trips until he had to start shooting. By January, he and Lainey would have some established history—enough to justify a temporary long-distance relationship. Maybe he could even talk her into tagging along. But that was getting ahead of himself.
“Tell Parafilms I said it’s a go,” Drew stated flatly.
On the monitor, Paulie visibly brightened. Drew could almost see the dollar signs flashing in his eyes. “I’ll get right on negotiations. We aren’t taking less than twenty mil for this one. All that time in the makeup chair calls for a few extra zeroes. I bet I have the contract in my hand before the end of business hours today.” He readied his pen. “Now tell me where I should have the paperwork sent.”
“Nice try,” Drew noted. “But I’m not telling you where I am.”
“How am I supposed to take care of the contract?” Paulie asked, indignant.
Drew leaned forward, lifting one hand to the side of his mouth before speaking in a conspirative whisper. “There’s this amazing invention ... it’s called email...”
“There you go being a smart ass again.” Paulie folded his arms and tapped his pen against his desk in rapid movements. “You’re going to have to tell me eventually. I already checked with your folks so I know you ain’t in Georgia. And we both know that camping story was a load of horse manure.”
Drew was about to offer his agent another snarky comeback, but his cellphone buzzed. Hoping it might be Lainey, he decided it was time for his vacation to resume. “Listen, Paulie, I’m getting a call so I’m going to have to cut this short. Email me over the contract when you have it. I’m leaving things in your capable hands. Oh, and, Paulie,” he added with his finger on the power button. “Don’t try to sic Cat on me again. It’s not going to happen with her, especially not now.”
“What?” Paulie’s eyes bugged out of his head. He was too p
erceptive for his own damn good. “Is that what you’re up to? Did you run off with some woman? Who is she and what does she—”
Drew clicked the power off and lowered the monitor before his agent could finish his sentence ... lecture ... rampage—whatever was going through his head. After racing to the counter, he managed to grab his phone mere seconds before the call went to voicemail. The last thing he wanted was to miss the one voice he actually longed to hear, though he did make sure to check the number this time in case it was someone less inspiring.
“Hey, Lainey!’ Drew actually chirped into the receiver.
On the other end of the line, Lainey’s voice was like a line of music despite her strange request. “Hey, Drew! I can’t talk long since I’m on the clock, but I wanted to see if you were up for a double date later today. The fall is the perfect time for a hayride.”
Lainey could’ve invited Drew on a tour of the sanitation building and he still would’ve dropped everything to meet her there, no questions asked. Even though he hadn’t been on a hayride since grammar school, the idea wasn’t entirely unappealing. There was a certain luxury in being able to recapture that sort of innocent adventure. So he’d jotted down the directions to a combination lighthouse and nature trail located in a small branch-off town of Cape May called The Point, and set off on his way. Lainey told him she’d be there right after work, but Drew decided to head out a few hours early so he could hike along the paths. He was lucky he did because the place was filling up fast. He grabbed one of the last parking spots in the facility while officers directed the extra cars to park on the street surrounding the grounds.
Once the parking debacle was over and he had a chance to take a look around, he was truly awed by the beauty of the landscape. Though placed right on the edge of the beach, there was also a bird conservatory that went on for miles. As he walked along the trails, he spotted more than one person with binoculars, studying the rare species that flew overhead or glided along the lakes. Some areas were surrounded by trees while in others there was nothing but marshland outlined with reeds and cattails that stood taller than his waist. He even stumbled across a lake inhabited by a combination of ducks, swans, and geese. An assortment of wildflowers grew along the edges of the trail and he plucked a variety of yellow, white, and purple sprigs to offer to Lainey once she arrived.