“Oh yeah?” he asked, one side of his lips slowly rising. “Show me.”
Before I knew it, I was scooting over to closer to him. He didn’t stop me when I leaned over and pressed my lips against his, kissing him gently. For a moment, it was like he’d lost himself. He deepened our kiss, pushing his tongue past my lips. I sucked on it and then moaned into his mouth when I felt his hands on my breasts. Excitement filled my belly. I just knew I was about to get what I’d been wanting for so long… Until he suddenly stopped.
“Sage, I want to do this and you don’t know how much I do but I don’t wanna do it like this. The first time we take it to that point, I want to be able to call you my woman officially. I want to be able to get mad if another nigga even looks at you in a way that I don’t approve. I want to feel like I can stake claim on you because you’re mine. You deserve that.”
On one hand, I fell deeper for him because of what he was saying but, on the other hand, I wished he didn’t respect me quite as much. I wanted a man to know my worth and treat me accordingly, but I also wanted to be fucked.
“We don’t have to go the whole way if you don’t want but there is still something that I want to do.”
My eyes never left his as I began to pull at the buckle of his belt. He breathed evenly, with a lust-filled gaze, allowing me to take control until he then shook his head.
“Nah, I can’t let you—”
With my finger pressed against his lips, I stopped him before he said something neither one of us wanted to hear. He could play the respectable gentleman another day. We both knew that he wanted it. I was willing to be patient because I knew that if he got a taste of me before he made up his mind that he was ready, he would have regrets. He was a man who liked to be in control when it came to things that he considered were important and I wanted to give him that. Regret was something that I didn’t want involved in the equation when it came to Ink and me. However, when it came to other things, I couldn’t wait.
“You’ve made me cum a few times and never asked for anything in return,” I told him, whispering my words against his neck. “At least let me do you this once.”
As I said those last words, I dropped my hand into his lap and began massaging his dick through his jeans. It was hard already, bulging through the material, begging for my touch before it had even had the chance to feel me. Ink didn’t object and when I felt his length swell even further under my touch, I applied more pressure as I nestled my face into his neck. I heard him suck in a deep breath, inhaling my scent.
“Damn, you smell so good,” he whispered, and I felt my pussy gush warm honey. He hadn’t even touched me, but I already was ready to come.
With expertise and quick movements, I unzipped his pants and slipped my fingers inside the opening to grab his girth. He responded by reclining back on the soft suede sofa and that was all the permission I needed.
Once I was able to release his massive manhood through the opening in his designer boxers, I lowered myself down until I was face to dick.
God, he’s so big, I thought, my mouth moistening as I eagerly observed his length. More than anything, I wanted to take him in between my jaws but I delayed, knowing that the anticipation of it all would only turn him on even more. Using my hands, I manipulated his muscle between my fingers, running my thumb over the mushroom head with expertise until he let out a low, guttural moan.
He didn’t speak and I didn’t either. I didn’t want to put words to our actions because I knew that his body was at war with his mind. I preferred it to be that way than for his mind to be at war with me.
Opening my mouth into a large O-shape, I blew hot air on the tip of his dick and watched him squirm in response, as I expected. No man could resist the promise of good head when it was offered, and Ink didn’t show me anything differently. Like the tip of an ice cream cone, I licked the slit of his opening a few times, dick-teasing him for a few moments before lowering my mouth on top of him, trying my hardest to swallow him whole. It was a miraculous feat. Though I hadn’t been with many men before, Ink was by far the largest and I had to squeeze my eyes tightly shut as I forced myself not to gag as I took him in. I had to put on my grown-woman shit.
He tastes so damn good.
I sucked and licked on him as if I were trying to reach the center of a Tootsie Roll pop. My clit thumped to the rhythm of my tongue as I beat it across the head of his pole, beckoning him into that happy place where he could release all worries, angst and fury into me so I could swallow it down my throat.
His hips began to move, and he placed his hand on the back of my head, forcing himself deeper down my throat. Like a champ, I rolled with it, clamping my lips hard on his pole. I sucked that dick like it gave me life, like my oxygen came from it. In my mind, it did. Cupping my breasts in my hands, I played with my nipples, pinching them hard as he jerked into my mouth, pushing past my tonsils. I felt his dick began to throb as the nut in his balls made its way further south. My pussy leaked with anticipation for that moment. I couldn’t wait to swallow him down. I imagined that his semen tasted like rich vanilla cream and I sucked even harder, impatient for the moment when I would be able to see if it were true.
“Fuck.”
Ink talked dirty while I fucked him with my mouth and it only made me want to get even nastier in response. I spit on the dick and then rolled my saliva around over the top of his head all the way down to his balls, working him so good that he grew nearly another whole inch more. While jacking him off, I clamped my lips around the head and thrashed my tongue against it while sucking hard like I was trying to pull slurp a smoothie through a mini-straw. His body went rigid as he came, shooting warm, thick liquid between my jaws. I didn’t miss a beat and swallowed over and over, not spilling a single drop. With my hand, I gave him a squeeze and pushed upward like one would do when trying to get the last bit of toothpaste out the tube. I wanted to empty him completely, I was hungry for him and, even after he was done, I still craved more.
“Got damn.” He sighed and leaned his head all the way back, his eyes closed with his face pointed towards the ceiling. “I ain’t never in my life experienced no shit like that.”
With a smile, I ran a finger over my lips, swiping up any leftovers that remained there and then dipped it into my mouth to suck them off.
“Do you feel relaxed?” I asked, leaning into him.
“Like a motherfucka,” he replied, his eyes still closed.
I fixed up his clothes, staring at his dick longingly before forcing myself to push it back into his boxers and zip up his jeans. I could tell that he was only seconds away from going to sleep.
“I’m going to bed. If you still want to sleep out here, the linen is in the closet in the hall.”
Without opening his eyes, he nodded his head. I paused and stared at him for a moment, admiring how incredibly breathtakingly sexy of a man he was right then. When I rolled around on my heels to head to my room, the sound of him calling my name stopped me in my tracks.
“Sage?”
“Yes?” I answered, turning around.
His head was up, and his eyes were open, pointed directly at me. He appeared completely relaxed, almost in a state of bliss.
“You know I want to come in there with you, right? If I can’t control this shit… don’t be surprised if you find me slipping up under those covers. What you just did was mind-blowing,” he added with a light chuckle. “But thanks again for putting up with this shit. This ain’t yo’ drama but you really came through for me in a way that I can’t remember anyone else doing in my entire life.”
With a smirk, I clasped my hands behind my back and twisted playfully back and forth while shooting him goo-goo eyes.
“I’m supposed to. Aren’t I your friend?”
His face went serious all of a sudden; the small hint of a smile immediately disappeared from his lips.
“Yes, you’re definitely my friend,” he replied. “And I don’t take that shit lightly. When I consider some
one a friend, to me, that bond is the same as being bound by blood. Like family… and, soon, something more.”
That last part sent flutters of excited energy coursing through my belly.
“Goodnight. I guess I’ll see you in the morning,” I told him, giving him one last smile before making my exit. I made sure to walk slowly, winding my hips seductively, because I was absolutely positive that he was watching me go.
“Maybe in the morning,” he called out. “Maybe later tonight.”
19
Ink
* * *
Sage had my mind fucked up.
The shit was crazy when I thought about it because I’d been so used to dealing with empty headed females who weren’t about shit but hooking up with a nigga with cash. I never considered I would ever find someone real. But the more I spent time with her and the more I saw her interactions with my daughter, the more I could see us together. I still wanted to take it slow, though. We were vibing heavy, but I wanted to have something lasting with her; a real relationship for once in my life.
And then there was Tami…
An entire month had passed since the night Tami left Tamiyah at Kale’s and I hadn’t seen or heard from her since. I wasn’t complaining about it, though, and Tamiyah hadn’t said much about her either. Although I never thought I would feel right having another woman around my daughter, after the morning we both spent the night at Sage’s place, she’d been asking about her and begging for her to be around ever since.
At first, I didn’t know how she’d made such an impression on Tamiyah that she would ask about Sage before her own mother but when I really thought about it, it made sense. Sage spent time with her, brushing her hair, coloring with her, playing with toys, and reading to her. Whereas Tami had always treated her daughter like an obligation she had to deal with, Sage enjoyed having her company, taking her on shopping trips and to the nail shop whenever she went; all kinds of girly shit.
“Daddy?” Tamiyah said, squinting as we pulled up in the circular driveway of my crib. “Is that Mommy? Sitting in front of the door?”
I looked up and suppressed my groan.
Fuck.
So much about her was different from the last time I’d seen her, but I could make out Tami anywhere. As my ride crept to a complete stop, she stood to her feet, my eyes on her and hers on mine. It was easy to see that she had been living the not-so-fabulous life of a junkie during the time she was gone. She was emaciated beyond the point of what was natural. Not only was she sitting there with the Mercedes Benz I’d bought her nowhere in sight, her clothes were dirty and soiled, her hair looked like a bird’s nest, her once perfectly manicured nails were broken and sporting traces of chipped polish and, though she tried to hide it, the way she fidgeted and scratched at her arms was more than enough evidence of her most recent activities.
I don’t have time for this shit.
“Miyah, let’s get out. I’ll unlock the door. You go on in the house and let me talk to Mommy outside,” I told her, trying not to clench my teeth as I spoke, though my jaw was so tight.
“Okay,” she answered, her voice barely audible.
When I stepped out of the car, Tami refused to meet my eyes as she continued to scratch and looked anywhere but where I stood. After the blogs finally cooled down from the story of our public argument in front of my shop, I saw a few bloggers post photos and videos of her on Instagram. In each one, she was ‘living her best life’ in multiple night clubs all around town. There were videos of her popping bottles, ordering shitloads of food for random broads and dancing with niggas who couldn’t keep their hands to themselves but most likely weren’t paying for shit. Evidently, the money she had stashed had run out and now she was back to beg for more.
“Miyah!” Tami spoke with a cracked voice, the second that I pulled her from the back seat.
She spread her arms wide and her lips followed suit, forming a smile. I winced at the sight of her dark yellow teeth and cracked lips. Never in life had I seen Tami look that bad but the image gave me déjà vu. This was exactly how I remembered her mama looking before she overdosed. It was a sight that I tried hard to forget.
“Come here! Give me a hug, baby.”
Holding my hand in her tiny one, Tamiyah paused for a moment to observe her mother and then turned her head up to look at me, as if for permission. With my lips in a straight line, I nodded to tell her that she could go ahead. No matter what I’d said before, I would never keep her from her mother. I would never let her be with her outside of my presence, though. Not until I was certain she would be safe.
Tamiyah walked slowly forward and when she was close enough, Tami bent down to give her a hug, pulling her in tight as if she hadn’t been the one to make the decision to abandon her in the first place. Tamiyah’s arms wrapped around her mother’s neck but there was an awkward expression on her face throughout the embrace. Like she was confused about her emotions or Tami’s appearance… maybe both.
“Let me get you in the house, Miyah,” I told her when I couldn’t take anymore. The shit was hard as hell to watch.
With my keys in my hand, I began walking towards the door to unlock it with Tamiyah dragging her legs behind me. When Tami tried to follow, I put my hand up to stop her. Thankfully, she didn’t give me no shit about it.
“Why are you here?” I gritted on her as soon as I walked back out. “You’re a fuckin’ fiend, Tami. Damn… look at you! This shit is pitiful as hell. You been hitting that dope hard and there ain’t no way that you this bad after one damn month. When did you first start using that shit?”
She opened her mouth to say something but couldn’t get anything out. It was a disturbing sight and, as much as I wanted to hate Tami for what she’d done to herself, it was all too pathetic to even get mad. I felt sorry for her and partly to blame for what was going on in her life. If I’d never married her, knowing I didn’t love her, and then moved her across the country to a place where she knew no one, maybe she wouldn’t have turned out that way.
“Ink… I need your help,” she said. Tears spilled from your cheeks. “I’m disgusted with myself. And when I saw the look in my baby’s eyes when she came over to me...” She began to cry even harder and lifted her arm to wipe snot from her nose. “She was afraid of me. I don’t want that and… if you’ll let me come back home so I can get clean, I can get better. I can be the mother that she wants me to be.”
“There is no way I can allow you to be alone with Miyah while you’re dealing with this shit, Tami. You won’t be in the right frame of mind and I have to protect her.”
She threw her hands up. “So, have someone here with us! A therapist or somebody to help me get through this and also look after her. I just—I want my life back. I want to be clean and I can’t do this without you, Ink.”
Watching her, I shook my head, not believing what I was about to say. Still, it had to be done. I’d spent a lot of time trying to help Tami get her shit together and, in the end, that’s all it was: time wasted.
“I can’t do that this time. You need to go.”
Her eyes swelled with tears and when she looked in my face, I knew that she was just as surprised as I was to hear my words. She’d had a lot of people come and go out of her life but, from the beginning, she always knew that she could count on me. Even when I told myself that I was done with her, Tami always found a way to weasel herself back into my life. Not that time.
The streets said I was heartless and cold because that’s the side I showed to them. But Tami was one of the rare people who’d had the privilege of seeing the other side of me. When someone stuck their neck out for me or was there when I needed them, it created a bond between us that wasn’t easily broken. Throughout my life, Tami had done that on more than one occasion, but, like Sage once told me, I couldn’t think about our past when I was trying to make sure my daughter had a chance at a future.
“Ink, don’t do this.”
I sighed and placed both hands on top of my h
ead, interlocking my fingers together. It wasn’t going to end well for either one of us. I couldn’t do what she wanted me to, and she wouldn’t do what I wanted unless I did something to hurt her feelings. Tami was stubborn; she never let go that easily.
I didn’t know how but I had a sudden feeling that the situation that I was finding myself in was going to quickly go from bad to worse. When I saw a car turn around the corner towards my house, I was proven to be right.
A sparkling cream Bentley coupe pulled up, the top down, as the premium paint job glistened in the sunlight. Sage had her long hair flowing in the wind, dark glasses on her face as she pulled into the driveway. She was so beautiful that she brightened up the entire street, until she got close enough to see Tami in front of me. I couldn’t see her eyes, but from the way her face seemed to tense under the dark-tined shades, she was not happy in the least.
“This bitch is still in the picture?” I heard Tami snarl, curling her lips in disgust and fury before turning to me. “Ink, listen to me, I know we got problems, but please trust me when I say you need to leave her alone.”
I shook my head. “How can you be jealous of her when you were trying to fuck with Kale behind my back? And what about all the other niggas you been around here being a hoe with? Get da fuck outta here. You must still be getting high.”
Stepping to the side, I was about to head over to Sage when Tami reached out and grabbed my arm. I turned to her and, even though I wanted nothing to do with her, I couldn’t avoid seeing the desperation in her eyes.
“Send her away!” Licking her lips, she glanced over her shoulder to make sure that Sage wasn’t near before continuing. “Don’t go to her. She’s not the one for you.”
I snatched my arm away. “How would you know what’s for me? You’ve spent the last few years trying to prove it’s you and now look.”
Tami dropped her head, her shoulders slumping over as she realized that her words no longer held weight when it came to me.
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