How Not to Get Rich

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How Not to Get Rich Page 19

by Alan Pell Crawford


  “will come and want”: Lewis Leary, ed., Mark Twain’s Correspondence with Henry Huttleston Rogers, 1893–1909 (Berkeley: University of California Press, 1969), 83.

  “it cannot make”: Ibid., 89.

  “got knocked flat”: Ibid., 95–96.

  “that would have been foresight”: Ibid., 98.

  “stand by for a cyclone!”: Ibid., 99–100.

  “at as low”: Ibid., 104.

  “an absolutely sure”: Ibid., 107.

  “spent two francs”: Ibid., 100.

  “knocked every rag”: Ibid., 108.

  “I must be there”: Ibid.

  “with just barely”: Ibid., 109.

  “diphthongs, fractions”: Ibid., 110.

  “was a marvelous invention”: Albert Bigelow Paine, Mark Twain: A Biography, Vol. III (New York: Chelsea House, 1980), 991.

  “though it would”: Richard Zacks, Chasing the Last Laugh: Mark Twain’s Raucous and Redemptive Round-the-World Comedy Tour (New York: Doubleday, 2016), 44.

  “If we can rent”: Leary, Correspondence with H. H. Rogers, 118.

  “is to teach myself”: Ibid., 118–19.

  “To that”: Ibid., 119.

  “I never had a friend”: Ibid., 112.

  “Every day”: Ibid., 4.

  “Why ask Rogers?”: Ibid., 7.

  “take a breath”: Zacks, Chasing the Last Laugh, 45.

  21. “MONEY FOR A MONUMENT”

  “bondage of debt”: Resa Willis, Mark and Livy: The Love Story of Mark Twain and the Woman Who Almost Tamed Him (New York: Atheneum, 1992), 232.

  “acres of figures”: Kenneth R. Andrews, Nook Farm: Mark Twain’s Hartford Circle (Cambridge: Harvard University Press, 1950), 231.

  “I guess I am”: Albert Bigelow Paine, Mark Twain: A Biography, Vol. I (New York: Chelsea House, 1980), 409–10.

  “I hope your business troubles”: Richard Zacks, Chasing the Last Laugh: Mark Twain’s Raucous and Redemptive Round-the-World Comedy Tour (New York: Doubleday, 2016), 30.

  “This time”: Willis, Mark and Livy, 225.

  “lectured and robbed”: Albert Bigelow Paine, Mark Twain: A Biography, Vol. II (New York: Harper & Brothers, 1912), 79.

  “after which”: Willis, Mark and Livy, 225.

  “constant unceasing adulation”: Ibid., 218.

  “I am sure”: Ibid., 220.

  “What had started”: Zacks, Chasing the Last Laugh, 161.

  “I appreciate”: Lewis Leary, ed., Mark Twain’s Correspondence with Henry Huttleston Rogers, 1893–1909 (Berkeley: University of California Press, 1969), 306.

  “For the first time”: Ibid., 310.

  “I hope you”: Albert Bigelow Paine, Mark Twain: A Biography, Vol. III (New York: Chelsea House, 1980), 1055–56.

  “retire gracefully”: Leary, Correspondence with H. H. Rogers, 283.

  “This way out”: Ibid., 284.

  “I wish you would”: Ibid., 286.

  “a second American embassy”: Willis, Mark and Livy, 248.

  calls fraudulent: Zacks, Chasing the Last Laugh, 23–24.

  “as one of the first”: “The Hero as Man of Letters,” New York Times, October 30, 1900.

  “It is as an American”: Ibid.

  22. “YOU CANNOT LOSE A PENNY”

  “renewed youth”: Resa Willis, Mark and Livy: The Love Story of Mark Twain and the Woman Who Almost Tamed Him (New York: Atheneum, 1992), 257.

  “Among us”: Lewis Leary, ed., Mark Twain’s Correspondence with Henry Huttleston Rogers, 1893–1909 (Berkeley: University of California Press, 1969), 445.

  “pure albumin”: Ibid., 505.

  “acted like poisons”: Ibid.

  “implored them all”: Ibid., 506.

  “Yes—take it as medicine”: Albert Bigelow Paine, Mark Twain: A Biography, Vol. III (New York: Chelsea House, 1980), 1151.

  “The scientific testimonials”: Fred Kaplan, The Singular Mark Twain: A Biography (New York: Doubleday, 2003), 576.

  “feed the world’s hungry”: Willis, Mark and Livy, 254.

  “automatically punches”: Leary, Correspondence with H. H. Rogers, 337.

  “merely expecting”: Richard Zacks, Chasing the Last Laugh: Mark Twain’s Raucous and Redemptive Round-the-World Comedy Tour (New York: Doubleday, 2016), 365.

  “could get my living”: Leary, Correspondence with H. H. Rogers, 328.

  “I’ve landed”: Ibid., 327.

  “Competition would be”: Ibid., 338.

  “I do not feel”: Peter Krass, Ignorance, Confidence, and Filthy Rich Friends: The Business Adventures of Mark Twain, Chronic Speculator and Entrepreneur (Hoboken, NJ: John Wiley, 2007), 226.

  “or with wool”: Leary, Correspondence with H. H. Rogers, 343.

  “was about time”: Ibid., 436.

  “It’s as good as”: Ibid., 445.

  “five or six fingers”: Zacks, Chasing the Last Laugh, 382–83.

  “would consider”: Leary, Correspondence with H. H. Rogers, 560.

  “Mark Twain is”: “Receiver Wants to See Mark Twain,” New York Times, January 30, 1908.

  “It is”: Gary Scharnhorst, ed., Mark Twain: The Complete Interviews (Tuscaloosa: University of Alabama Press, 2006), 660.

  “If I had kept out”: Leary, Correspondence with H. H. Rogers, 561.

  “Do be careful”: Kaplan, The Singular Mark Twain, 595.

  23. “TO SUCCEED IN BUSINESS. . .”

  “broken down”: Richard Zacks, Chasing the Last Laugh: Mark Twain’s Raucous and Redemptive Round-the-World Comedy Tour (New York: Doubleday, 2016), 342.

  “If Mark Twain”: Ibid., 343.

  “The report of my illness”: Ibid.

  “well ahead of his time”: “8 Branding Tactics Marketers Can Learn From Literary Legend Mark Twain,” Advertising and Marketing Blog, MDG Advertising, September 27, 2013, www.mdgadvertising.com/blog/8-branding-tactics-marketers-can-learn-from-literary-legend-mark-twain/.

  “had ‘platform’”: Tom Bentley, “Mark Twain’s 10-Sentence Course on Branding and Marketing,” MarketingProfs, July 15, 2013, www.marketingprofs.com/articles/2013/11152/mark-twains-10-sentence-course-on-branding-and-marketing.

  “Once he copyrighted himself”: Laura Skandera Trombley, “America’s First Modern Celebrity,” The Daily Beast, March 20, 2010, www.thedailybeast.com/articles/2010/03/20/americas-first-modern-celebrity.html.

  “I cannot say”: Mark Twain’s Speeches (New York: Harper & Brothers, 1910), 341.

  “My axiom is”: Ibid.

  Index

  * * *

  A | B | C | D | E | F | G | H | I | J | K | L | M | N | O | P | Q | R | S | T | U | V | W | X | Y | Z

  A

  Adams, Henry, 7

  Adventures of Huckleberry Finn, The (Twain), 105–6, 107, 110, 113–14, 123, 125, 192

  Adventures of Tom Sawyer, The (Twain), 81–82, 167

  Allen, Woody, 6

  Amalgamated Copper, 153

  American Claimant, The (Twain), 140–41

  American Plasmon Company, 184–85

  American Publishing Company, 61, 67–68, 78, 104, 173, 189

  Andrews, Kenneth, 78

  Armour, Philip, 28

  B

  baby-bed clamp, 108–10, 129

  Bagehot, Walter, 67

  Bastiat, Frederic, 118

  Beecher, Henry Ward, 78, 130–32

  Bell, Alexander Graham, 89, 90

  Bentley, Tom, 190–91

  Big Hairy Audacious Goal (BHAG), 13–14

  Bixby, Horace, 19–22, 23, 24, 25

  blind lead, found and lost, 43–47, 55

  Bliss, Elisha, 61, 67–70, 78, 104

  Bliss, Frank, 95

  book illustrations, 95–100, 106

  Bowers, H. C., 92–93

  Brooks, Elisha, and Brooks brothers, 29

  Buffalo, New York, 65–66, 75, 77

  Buffalo Daily Express, 65, 75

  Buffett, Warren, 153

  Built to Last (Collins and Porras), 13–14
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  Burton, Nathaniel J., 134

  C

  Camp, Herman, 58–59

  Carnegie, Andrew, 4, 28, 29, 144, 174–75, 184

  Carnegie, Margaret, 184

  carpet weaving, 181–83, 189

  Carson City, Nevada, 29–30, 33, 35, 38, 55

  Celebrated Jumping Frog of Calaveras County and Other Sketches, The (Twain), 57–58

  Century Company and Century magazine, 111–12, 160, 173

  Charles I, King, 5

  Charles L. Webster & Company

  Beecher book planned by, 130–32

  financial troubles of, 134–36, 139–43, 149–50, 155, 156–57, 159, 160–61, 171

  formation of, 104–7

  Grant’s memoir published by, 1–2, 111, 113, 134

  Hall as head of, 137, 139–40, 142–43, 146, 155, 159

  Huckleberry Finn published by, 113–14

  pope’s biography published by, 125–30

  Scott’s embezzlement from, 132–34

  Webster’s resignation from, 136–37

  Charles Pratt & Company, 152

  Chasing the Last Laugh (Zacks), 135–36, 161, 173–74, 176–77

  Chicago Herald, 162, 163

  Civil War, 1, 24–25, 27–28

  Clemens, Clara, 67, 81, 171, 173, 174, 177, 189, 192

  Clemens, Henry, 14–15

  Clemens, Jane Lampton, 5, 11, 15, 19, 23, 46, 49, 95, 123

  Clemens, Jean, 67, 108, 188–89

  Clemens, John Marshall, 5–6, 7, 8, 20, 70–71

  Clemens, Mollie, 59, 62, 100, 123

  Clemens, Olivia (Livy) Langdon

  coal business earnings, 93, 94, 140, 146

  family finances and, 122, 140, 141–42, 149–50, 171, 173, 174, 175, 176, 177

  Hall and, 139

  health of, 141, 179–80, 188

  moves to Europe and, 93–94, 141–42

  Twain’s financial troubles and, 156, 157, 158–59, 160–62, 165, 166, 167, 169

  Twain’s marriage to, 62, 63–66, 67

  unhappiness in Buffalo and move to Hartford, 75, 77, 79, 80–81

  Webster and, 103–4, 127, 128–29

  Clemens, Orion

  Clemens Gold and Silver Mining Company and, 47–49

  inventions of, 8, 70–72

  mother living with, 123

  as newspaper owner and editor, 8

  as print shop owner, 11

  real estate management by, 40, 58–59, 65, 94–95, 100

  as secretary to Nevada Territory, 29–30, 55

  Twain’s cocaine trade aspirations and, 14–15

  Twain’s communications with, 23, 58, 96, 97, 122, 143

  Twain’s inventions and, 74, 83, 106

  Clemens, Pamela. See Moffett, Pamela Clemens

  Clemens, Samuel Langhorne, 3. See also Twain, Mark

  Clemens, Susy, 67, 174

  Clemens Gold and Silver Mining Company, 47–49

  Clement, Geoffrey, 5

  coal business, 93, 94, 140, 146

  coca plant and cocaine, 12–13, 14–16

  Collins, James, 13–14

  Colonel Crossman (steamboat), 22, 24

  Colonel Sellers (play), 82

  Comstock Lode and mines, 29–30, 35, 51, 54, 86

  Connecticut Yankee in King Arthur’s Court, A (Twain), 122, 135

  Consolidated Gas Company, 152

  content marketing, 190

  Crane, Susan, 75, 81, 150

  “cundrums,” 91–92

  Cunneen, Conor, 190

  D

  Dana, Charles, 125

  Deere, John, 7

  disruption and disruptive innovation, 24–25

  Dunne, Finley Peter, 169

  E

  Eastern Business College, 193–94

  Edison, Thomas, 189

  elastic strap invention, 73–75

  Elmira, New York, 63, 75, 94, 150, 167–68, 172, 188

  Europe, 60–61, 79, 93–94, 141–42, 146, 161, 162, 174, 176, 188

  Exploration of the Valley of the Amazon (Herndon), 12–13

  F

  Fact and Date Game, 106–7

  Fisher, Roger, 20

  Florida, Missouri, 3–4

  Flowing Bowl, The (Schmidt), 135

  Following the Equator (Twain), 173, 174

  Ford, Henry, 14

  Fredonia, New York, 98, 110–11, 128, 137

  Fuller, Frank, 91–92

  G

  Galbraith, John Kenneth, 54

  Garrett, Garet, 7

  Gates, Bill, 153

  Gilded Age, The (Twain and Warner), 3, 81, 82

  Gladwell, Malcolm, 4, 73, 144, 152

  Gould, Jay, 4, 28

  Grant, Fred, 133

  Grant, Julia Dent, 1, 2, 9, 113, 125

  Grant, Ulysses S., 1–2, 110, 111–13, 114, 123, 125, 126–27, 134, 137

  Greeley, Horace, 72–73

  Greenfield, Rebecca, 74–75

  H

  Hall, Frederick J.

  as assistant at Webster & Company, 134, 136, 137

  as head of Webster & Company, 137, 139–40, 142–43, 144, 146, 150, 155, 159

  Twain’s communications with, 145, 146, 147, 149

  Hall, Jesse, 145–46

  Hannibal, Missouri, 3–4, 8–9, 22, 27

  Hannibal Western Union, 9

  Harper’s Weekly, 85

  Hartford, Connecticut

  Colt Armory in, 77, 92, 115, 116

  Pratt & Whitney Company in, 77, 120, 123–24, 158

  Twain’s acquaintances in, 115, 131, 134

  Twain’s financial troubles and, 93, 140, 150, 166–68

  Twain’s home and life in, 77–82, 93, 94, 103–4, 122, 140

  Twain’s investments in, 85–86, 93, 115

  Hartford Accident Insurance Company, 85–87

  Hawaii (Sandwich Islands), 58, 59–60, 151

  Hay, John, 72

  Hearst, George, 35

  Herndon, William, 12–13

  Higbie, Cal, 42, 43–47

  Hill, David, 133

  Hinckle, Warren, 52

  Houghton, Josephine, 7

  Howells, William Dean

  pope’s biography and, 126, 130

  on The Innocents Abroad, 61

  on Twain and Livy after world tour, 179

  Twain’s communications with, 94, 106–7, 114, 140, 141, 174, 180–81

  visits to Twain’s Hartford home, 80, 81

  I

  ice-house factories, 87

  Incas, 12–13

  Independent Watch Company, 111

  Innocents Abroad, The (Twain), 60–62, 67, 70, 81, 104, 173

  iron industry, 7

  J

  Jackass Hill, 55–56, 57

  Jacquard loom, 181–83

  James R. Osgood and Company, 104

  Jones, John Percival, 86, 87–88, 123

  K

  Kaolotype Engraving Company, 96–100, 106, 193

  Kaplan, Fred, 75

  Kaplan, Justin, 3, 70

  Keokuk, Iowa, 11–12, 55, 123

  Keynes, John Maynard, 6

  Kinney, John D., 31–33

  Knight of Pius uniform, 127–28

  L

  Laffan, William, 121

  laissez-faire capitalism, 6

  Lake Tahoe (Bigler), 30–31, 38

  Langdon, Charles, 63, 75, 146

  Langdon, Jervis, 63, 64–65, 66, 75

  Leary, Lewis, 153

  Leavenworth, Zeb, 25

  Leo XIII, Pope, 125–26, 127, 128–30

  Library of American Literature, 135–36, 159, 160

  Life of Pope Leo XIII, The (O’Reilly), 129–30

  Life on the Mississippi (Twain), 100, 104

  Lincoln, Abraham, 24–25, 29

  Linotype machine, 121, 162, 163, 165

  M

  Marion Rangers, 27–28

  Mark and Livy (Willis), 172

  Mark Twain, Business Man (S. Webster), 106

  Mark Twain Company, 191–92

  Mar
tin, Joseph, 14, 15

  Matson, Owen, 190

  McClellan’s Own Story (McClellan), 134

  McCormick, Cyrus, 7

  Memoirs of Gen. W. T. Sherman (Sherman), 134

  Mergenthaler, Ottmar, 121, 162, 163, 165

  Mills, C. Wright, 5

  Moffett, Pamela Clemens, 21–22, 25, 27, 40, 49, 71, 95, 100–101, 111

  Moffett, William, 21–22

  Morgan, J. P., 4, 28, 153

  Morse, Samuel, 7

  Mount Morris Bank, 142–43, 149, 150, 159–60, 177

  Mr. Clemens and Mark Twain (Kaplan), 3

  N

  National Bell Telephone Company, 89

  Nebraska (steamboat), 25, 27

  Nevada Territory, 29, 36, 54, 55, 86

  New Orleans, Louisiana, 15–17, 23, 24

  New York City, 144, 149, 150–53, 167–68, 177, 188

  New York Herald, 57, 60, 174, 175–76, 187

  New York Journal, 187–88

  New York Times, 145, 152, 153, 177–78, 185

  New York Tribune, 60, 72–73, 103, 121, 161

  New York Vaporizer Company, 92

  Nook Farm, 78

  Nook Farm (Andrews), 78

  O

  O’Reilly, Bernard, 125, 129

  Outliers (Gladwell), 4, 152

  P

  Paige, James W.

  company stock purchased from, 157–58

  lawsuit, 145–46

  machine tinkering by, 121–22, 123–24, 136, 142, 155, 163

 

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