“I’m Dr. Colin McKenna and I’ve been volunteering here at Crossroads for the past three years. I’ve seen many teens come and go, some onto better things, some to seek out the rock bottom they need to hit in order to make the journey back. But this group here…this group has to be the most impressive yet.”
The teens laughed.
“On a more serious note…”
Lucky blinked when he looked at her.
“I used to fool myself into thinking I was doing a good deed by coming here once a month. It made me sleep a little easier at night knowing I was doing something. Until I realized that I didn’t have a clue as to what was truly going on, and that my efforts didn’t amount to a drop in the bucket compared to what I could be doing. So now I’m here two to three times a week for however long I’m needed.” He quietly cleared his throat. “And I’m always shocked to discover that I learn more from each of you about love and life and the beauty of the human spirit than I could ever teach you.”
Hot tears burned Lucky’s eyes as she searched his handsome face. Whereas he’d been merely sexy before, a man she could spend the rest of her life looking at and never tire of his features, now he emerged so breathtakingly beautiful she was spellbound.
After long moments she became aware of the silence in the room around her. She glanced at the participants, finding them looking at her warmly.
She realized they were waiting for her to speak.
Panic rose up from her stomach and she searched her mind for some wise-ass crack to make, something that would diffuse the somber atmosphere in the room, deflect the attention away from her.
Instead she squeezed Colin’s hand and said, “Hi, my name’s Lucky Clayborn. And I’m going to be all right.”
And in that one moment she knew that she would be.
“IT WAS NICE MEETING YOU,” the last of the teens said to Lucky at the door. “Come back and visit anytime.”
Her answer was a smile as she returned a hug, her gaze glued to Colin’s face over the girl’s shoulder.
Colin shifted his feet. While it appeared that Lucky had responded well to his surprise, he knew that he couldn’t fully know what was going on inside her mind, inside her heart. All he knew was that he’d had to try to help her move on somehow, and regular therapy sessions weren’t doing it for her. She’d thrown up a giant roadblock the first time she’d come to her session with him. And he understood from his partner that she wasn’t having much luck making any major breakthroughs with her, either.
So he’d thought that if he approached from a reversion-type position, put her in a room with kids the age she had been when she’d gone through what she had, he might be able to reach her somehow.
And his heart had contracted when he’d seen her connect with the kids, seeming to have gained some sort of acceptance about her situation. He didn’t kid himself into thinking he was responsible for it. But he’d like to think he’d played a small role in her progress.
He’d liked to think he could continue playing a larger role in her life.
Finally they were alone. Or as alone as two people could get with so many teenagers in one house. Sounds of laughter came from the kitchen. The television was on in the room to their right. And upstairs a girl was upset that someone had borrowed her shirt without telling her.
But all Colin could see was Lucky.
She avoided his gaze and quietly cleared her throat. “They’re a great bunch of kids.”
“That they are.”
She lifted her face to look at him, her eyes filled with curiosity. “Thank you for inviting me.”
He nodded. “Thanks for coming.”
Colin wanted to invite her out. Offer to drive her home. Ask her to come back to his place with him. But he knew it was too soon for any of that. He’d already decided that he wasn’t going to pursue anything more with her. Not now. Not tonight. His invitation had been but the first of many steps he had planned to work Lucky back into his life. Not just now, but forever.
She appeared uncomfortable. “Um, I guess I’ll be going now.”
Colin nodded again, thrusting his hands deep into his pants pockets to keep from reaching out for her. Touching her. “Good night.”
She looked a little confused and his resolve nearly snapped. Then she turned and with a final wave to the teens looking on from the other room, she walked out the door.
18
COLIN HAD NEVER KNOWN a week could be so long. Seven days that seemed a lifetime, simply because he’d gone that time without seeing Lucky. He hadn’t feasted on her lovely face, looked into her remarkable eyes, kissed her lush, provocative lips.
But if his plan had a chance in hell of working, he’d have to take things one slow step at a time. And if he needed any reminder of that, the fact that Lucky hadn’t tried to contact him since the Crossroads session shouted it at him.
One good thing happening in his life just then was that ever since his visit to Jamie, he hadn’t received any peculiar notes or threats or suffered any damage to his property. And private investigator Jenny Mathena assured him that nothing was being done to Lucky, either. Which, of course, might have something to do with Colin’s no longer seeing her.
He sat back in his office chair, making a few final notes on the addictive personality session he’d just led, then closed the file. He was easily doing double the work he had before, but curiously his activity seemed to fill him with twice the energy rather than draining his emotional and physical resources. He still jogged every morning, but no longer maintained the punishing pace he’d set for himself before.
Of course, life would be a whole hell of a lot easier if Will could have some luck in his efforts to bed the young resident he’d been dating. What had been weekly tennis matches were now twice a week, only because Colin didn’t have time for more due to his commitment to Crossroads and his plan to win back Lucky.
Anyway, he didn’t think he could handle the brutal matches into which Will channeled all of his sexual frustration more than twice a week. He was even toying with the idea of buying his friend an inflatable “date,” his argument being that if the girl wasn’t real it wasn’t really cheating.
The telephone at his elbow rang and he picked it up after the first ring.
“Mr. Maddox on the line for you, Dr. McKenna,” Annette said.
He thanked the secretary as he scratched the back of his neck. What could Don want? He grimaced, hoping it wasn’t bad news. Maybe he’d pushed Jamie straight into filing official charges against him with the county prosecutor’s office.
“Colin!” Don Maddox’s voice boomed over the receiver. “Good news, buddy. James Randolph Polson, IV, dropped the case.”
Colin’s relief was immediate and complete. “I can’t tell you how glad I am to hear that.”
“Not any happier than I am, dear boy. Not any happier than I am. This whole debacle had the makings of a real mess.”
He was telling him. “What happens if Jamie wakes up tomorrow and changes his mind?”
“Thankfully, the chances of that are slim to none. Polson’s attorney, whom I also happen to golf with once a week at Inverness, tells me James is in the process of moving to San Francisco where he’s going to open an art gallery.”
Colin smiled. Good for you, Jamie. Good for you. “I’m happy to hear it.”
And he was. Because it might mean that Jamie would stop taking his misery out on others and start concentrating on making himself happy.
Don sighed. “I won’t keep you. I just thought you’d want to hear the news the instant I got it.”
“Thanks, Don. It’s very good news indeed.”
He slowly replaced the receiver then got up and went to the filing cabinets behind him. Opening the one marked P he thumbed through the files until he found Jamie’s, stamped Closed across it with the stamp in his middle desk drawer, then put the file in his out box for Annette to put away in the archives.
Then he grabbed his jacket and headed out the back way,
his only thought to get home and continuing his plans for winning back Lucky.
TRAFFIC WAS LIGHT and the weather was perfect, making the drive from Sylvania to downtown Toledo almost a pleasure rather than a trial of patience. Colin parked his car on the street, relieved that he no longer had anything to worry about in that regard, then took the elevator upstairs and unlocked his door.
The instant he entered his apartment, he noticed something different.
He stood stock-still for a long moment, trying to put his finger on it. Then he identified the difference. Not so much a difference, really, but an addition. A scent. More specifically the smell of ginger, the scent Lucky always wore.
His heart pitched to sit on the marble floor next to his feet.
Of course, he knew she still had his key. And secretly he was glad she hadn’t felt the need to return it. As for her using it, he hadn’t dared to entertain such high hopes.
He put down his keys and his jacket and walked into the kitchen to find everything exactly the way he’d left it, and then he crossed the living room to the master suite where, again, everything was in order.
Then he spotted it. The piece of white notepaper in the middle of the coffee table…along with a single key.
His stomach clenched so tightly he nearly doubled over with the pain of it.
She had returned his key.
He slowly crossed the living room toward the table, hardly daring to hope he was wrong. Praying he was seeing things. But he wasn’t.
He slid the folded note out from under the key then opened it.
Dear Colin—I figure it’s only fair.
Meet me at…
He went on to read an unfamiliar address in the nearby Old West End section of Toledo.
He reached down to pick up the key. It was then he realized that it wasn’t his key.
LUCKY STOOD IN THE KITCHEN of her new one-bedroom apartment—easily four times the size of her old apartment—and forced herself to stop looking at the clock every two seconds. Colin would come.
Wouldn’t he?
She burned herself as she took lasagna from the oven, waving her hand to cool it before sticking it under cold running water. Ever since she’d seen him last week she’d known it was time to invite him back in. When she’d gazed into his eyes right before she’d left Crossroads, she’d known down to her bones that she loved the man, and that he not only loved her, he…well, he got her. He’d obviously done some soul-searching of his own while they’d been apart and it looked good on him.
Good? It had been all she could do not to use her key to his place that first night.
But considering all she’d gone through already that night, and on so many nights before and since, she’d thought it a good idea to take things a little slower. For a decade she’d rushed into relationships then just as quickly rushed back out.
But this one…Colin…well, he deserved special consideration. And not just because she owed him.
And she did owe him. More than any human being on the face of the earth. That night on his balcony he’d forced her not only to share the ghosts of her past but face them down. And while initially she’d hated him for it, she was coming to see that the showdown was long overdue. She’d wasted too many years living in self-imposed isolation. She’d lived in squalor because she couldn’t bring herself to touch money that was rightfully hers. Couldn’t bring herself to use her education because to do so would require more commitment than she’d been prepared to give to any job.
She’d begun meeting Dr. Morgan Szymanski for one-on-one sessions instead of group sessions this past week. And during the very first appointment Morgan had helped her realize that all these years she’d blamed herself for her father’s behavior. That maybe if she’d dressed differently, acted differently, she could have made him not want her. Morgan had helped her understand that while nothing could excuse her father’s behavior, it was well documented that after a family tragedy—such as the death of her mother, the anchor of their family—the male parent often mixed up familial roles. It didn’t mean he hadn’t loved her as his daughter. But without help and intervention, his mental illness had worsened until he’d believed the only just punishment for his actions was taking his own life.
Lucky didn’t kid herself into thinking she was all right. But she did take comfort in the belief that one day she would be, just as she’d told the kids at Crossroads.
Not only had she moved from her dilapidated apartment into this larger, airier one in the charm ing older section of Toledo, she’d put together a proposal for Renae to open another satellite shop of Women Only downtown, using her inheritance to fund the project. Renae had been ecstatic with the prospect and they were already shopping for a home for the new place.
Still with everything she’d been doing lately, she realized one thing was glaringly missing. Or rather someone: Colin.
Merely thinking about him made her heart beat faster and her palms dampen.
Dear, sweet, sexy Colin.
She turned to put the dish of lasagna on the old oak table she’d positioned in the middle of the kitchen and spotted him standing in the kitchen doorway. She didn’t know how long he’d been there, but she suspected it was a while, given his relaxed stance and the way he leaned against the jamb.
Her mouth watered with the intense desire to kiss him.
Her heart squeezed with the intense desire to love him.
“Hi,” she said, giving him what could only be classified as a goofy smile.
“Hi, yourself.” His smile made her toes curl inside her sandals.
Though he had never been inside the new place, it felt as if he’d been there forever. It felt as if he belonged there. They belonged there. Together.
Then again, it really didn’t matter where he was, or she was. So long as they were there together.
“I have to warn you up front. I need to take this slow,” she said.
He nodded, his dark eyes serious. “We’ll go as slow as you like.”
She realized she still held the lasagna dish and put it down in the middle of the table. With shaking hands, she took off her oven mitts.
Then, before she knew that’s what she was going to do, she rushed to the opposite side of the room and threw herself into Colin’s arms, her fingers bunching into his thick, soft hair, her mouth finding his cheek…and his eyebrow…and his forehead…then finally his mouth.
Oh, how she’d missed this. How she’d missed him. He made her feel beautiful and special and safe and loved. He made her feel like there wasn’t a thing in the world she couldn’t do if she put her mind to it. And that was a very precious gift, indeed.
Morgan had told her that she’d need to retrain herself sexually. That jumping into bed was never a good idea. But already Lucky realized a difference in her physical reaction to Colin. Yes, she wanted him with a desperation that took her breath away. But she also felt her heart swell in her chest. She felt the warmth of love swirl through her veins, the sense of completeness, of coming home that came with merely being in his arms.
And surely that couldn’t be wrong.
Reluctantly, she hauled her mouth away, then rested her forehead against his, laughing into his eyes.
“Is that your idea of slow?” he asked, his voice thick with desire, his eyes brimming with love.
“I think it’s a better idea if we maybe make things up as we go along,” she whispered.
“That’s the best idea I’ve heard in a long, long time….”
Epilogue
One month later…
COLIN FOUND IT IMPOSSIBLE to believe that just a short time ago he’d had to run to combat his sexual frustration. Now he was running to keep up his stamina so that he could keep up with Lucky, both in and out of the bedroom.
His feet slapped against the cement path through Promenade Park, the Maumee River catching the first rays of the rising summer sun. It never ceased to amaze him how everything looked the same. He’d undergone so many changes in the past c
ouple of months that surely the world around him should have changed as well.
Instead the summer grew hotter. The days grew longer.
And his love for Lucky grew more and more.
“You’re a sadist,” she said beside him, her tennis shoes having a difficult time keeping up with his.
Colin slowed the pace, reminding himself that she wasn’t used to running. At least not physically. Emotionally…well, she’d done enough of that to last a lifetime.
He drew to a stop, watching as she doubled over, trying to catch her breath.
He grinned at her. “You’re not supposed to do that.”
Her damp red ponytail shifted to the side of her face as she considered him from the corner of her eyes. “It works for me.”
He shook his head and stepped to the railing overlooking the muddy depths of the Maumee. Moments later she stepped next to him, automatically tucking her hand inside his. Colin marveled at the simple yet meaningful movement as he lifted the back of her hand to his mouth and kissed it. She smiled, then kissed the back of his hand. Then both of them turned to take in the view, their heads together, staring out at a future that promised to be as bright and golden as the sunrise bathing them in its summer warmth.
ISBN: 978-1-4268-6148-2
INDECENT
Copyright © 2004 by Lori and Tony Karayianni.
All rights reserved. Except for use in any review, the reproduction or utilization of this work in whole or in part in any form by any electronic, mechanical or other means, now known or hereafter invented, including xerography, photocopying and recording, or in any information storage or retrieval system, is forbidden without the written permission of the publisher, Harlequin Enterprises Limited, 225 Duncan Mill Road, Don Mills, Ontario, Canada M3B 3K9.
All characters in this book have no existence outside the imagination of the author and have no relation whatsoever to anyone bearing the same name or names. They are not even distantly inspired by any individual known or unknown to the author, and all incidents are pure invention.
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