by Cat Schield
Maybe?
“Or maybe neither one of us was ready for a committed relationship” she said. “And so we did the best thing we could do for ourselves and broke up.”
“It wasn’t that cut and dry for me.”
What did that mean? Lani sucked in a deep breath in an effort to calm her wildly fluctuating emotions. She hadn’t expected the fledgling intimacy between her and Asher to be tested so soon.
“What do you want me to say?” That you were my first love and I never got over you?
“I want you to be honest with me about how you feel.”
“Honest.” Her chest heaved as she gulped in a big breath. “Okay, if you want the truth, the reason I don’t think it’s a good idea for us to become business partners or any other kind of partner is that I’m not sure I can count on you.”
From the first she’d recognized that they approached situations completely differently. Where her personality was a bullet shot from a gun, a swift straight line from problem to solution, Asher was like air. A gentle breeze coming at her from one direction. Then moments later a gust of wind that smacked into her blind side, knocking her off her feet.
“You still see me as that irresponsible frat boy.” Asher scowled. “That’s not who I am and hasn’t been for a long time.”
Yet he couldn’t stick with anything. Not polo. Not the job with The Edmond Organization. Not her.
“Really?” she challenged. “Look at the mess you’re in because you didn’t take your responsibilities with the festival seriously.”
“You have no idea what I take seriously. Yes, I had access to the accounts...”
“And someone—probably Billy Holmes—was able to take advantage of that.”
“But it could’ve been any of us. Gina. Ross. Even Rusty given how close the two of them are. He chose me for some reason I don’t get.”
Lani heard Asher’s sweeping frustration, but couldn’t summon the courage to comfort him. “Hopefully I can figure that out. I’m heading to Las Vegas to meet with his mother tomorrow.”
But Asher wasn’t going to be thrown off topic. “What would it take for me to prove you can count on me?”
She dug her fingertips into the back of her shoulder where stress was pinching the nerves and gave her whirling brain a moment to process everything that was coming at her.
“I really don’t know.”
“Well, at least be straight with me on one thing. Do you think I stole the money from the festival?”
“No.” At least she could give him a clear, decisive answer on that score.
He gave her a tight smile. “Well, I guess that’s something. And the money for my bail. Do I return the hundred thousand dollars to you?”
Lani went cold. The intensity of the question put a hard lump in the pit of her stomach. Was he shooting in the dark or had he overheard her conversation with Kingston? She’d been careless when she didn’t realize he was in the apartment.
When she didn’t answer right away, he continued, “Or should I wire it directly back to Kingston Blue?”
Damn. Now he knew she’d been deceiving him from the start. “You can give it to me. I’ll get it back to him.”
His eyes narrowed. “Can I trust you?”
Although she knew it was a big show to get under her skin, Lani stiffened. “Of course.”
“I’m not so sure. Knowing how complicated our relationship is, you let me believe my father hired you. How could you let me think he was finally on my side?”
Lani dropped her eyes to the floor. “I shouldn’t have done that.”
“No,” he agreed. “You think you understand how messed up things are between us, but it’s worse than you know. It was a big deal for me to believe that he wanted to help me out.”
“Why such a big deal now when he’s supported you since the day he married your mother?”
A sardonic smile ghosted across his lips. “He supported me. But there were conditions tied to it. Conditions I had no idea about until three years ago.” Asher’s grim expression made Lani’s heart sink.
It was becoming clear that she’d made a huge error in judgment. “What sort of conditions?”
“He and my mother had a little side agreement regarding her alimony. She agreed that since I turned eighteen, any money he gave me came out of the payments he owed her. And as part of the deal, she wasn’t allowed to tell me anything about what was going on.”
Lani gasped. “Why would he do that?”
“Because he’s a miserable excuse for a human being. I don’t know if he regretted formally adopting me or if he just wanted to mess with her. A couple years ago, I found out she was nearly bankrupt and I couldn’t understand why. She finally broke down and confessed what had been going on. I confronted Rusty and he offered me a bargain. He would pay my mother everything he’d withheld if I agreed to sign a five-year contract with The Edmond Organization.”
“Did you?”
Asher kept his gaze fixed on the windows that faced the main house. “As much as I wanted to help my mother, I knew I wouldn’t survive five years working for Rusty. Instead, I got him to agree to let me work for him for two and a half years in exchange for fifty-percent of the money he’d spent on me. That, and what I had in investments was enough to get her out of trouble.”
“Why didn’t you tell me this before?” Lani asked, her heart aching for all he’d been through.
“Why should I?” He shook his head. “When you already had more than enough reasons not to trust me.”
He was right. She’d failed to believe him at every turn. And each time she’d been wrong.
“So now you know. I didn’t quit polo because I was afraid to be cut off. I didn’t join The Edmond Organization because I was trying to win Rusty’s approval, and I’m not leaving because I can’t stick with anything. I haven’t sold off my horses because I’m tired of training. And I don’t want to become your business partner as some sort of lark.”
Lani had no words that could undo the damage she’d caused by not believing in him. “I’m sorry.” It became immediately obvious this was the wrong thing to say.
“Don’t be. It’s my problem, not yours.” With his lips flattened into a thin line, he raked his fingers through his hair. “Look, I don’t feel much like celebrating tonight and it sounds like you’ve got a trip to get ready for. If it’s okay with you, I think we should skip dinner and call it a night.”
“Okay. I understand...”
And while she stood with her heart a lead stone in her chest, Asher headed into the master bedroom and closed the door behind him.
* * *
The morning after his fight with Lani, Asher woke with a headache and a really bad idea.
It was time for a party.
Not that he had anything to celebrate or was in the mood to be social. Lani had let him believe that she was on his side and that he had a reason to dream of a better future with her a big part of it. Nothing he’d done in the last three weeks had convinced her to give him a chance. She still perceived him as someone frivolous and shallow, unable to consider anyone’s welfare but his own. Had he really thought by letting her in on his bargain with Rusty that her outlook toward him would suddenly be transformed? He was so tired of fighting everyone’s bad opinion of him, of having to prove himself to people he loved.
The realization hit him like a piano falling from a very tall crane.
Damn.
He loved her. He loved Lani Li.
She was the one he let get away. Now he knew she was also the woman he couldn’t live without. The one person he longed to spend the rest of his life laughing and fighting and making love with. The certainty had been building for days. It had taken a huge relationship-ending blowout for the fog to clear from his brain.
Was it any wonder he wanted to act out, to wallow in self-sab
otage, letting everyone believe he was the same directionless jerk he’d always been?
He thought back to five years ago when he and Lani had first met. What if he’d been more serious back then instead of letting frivolous pursuits distract him? He could’ve saved his mother financial headaches and achieved a high level of success in his field. Instead he’d fallen short of expectations and reinforced Rusty’s disapproval.
At the time he hadn’t realized how he’d given his power away. Not until Lani had come along and opened his eyes to hard work and focused goal setting had he been filled by an optimistic sense of his own worth. How different things might’ve been if he’d had someone in his corner sooner.
Someone who could’ve channeled his ability to charm people into positive avenues. Much of what had appealed to him with the Soiree on the Bay festival was the chance to benefit others. How ironic that instead of helping people out, the whole situation had destroyed numerous lives.
Being the guy that everyone hated had been a wake-up call. Using his money and position to benefit others would be so much better than selfishly squandering everything he’d gained. When his accounts were unfrozen, he intended to make changes in his life. He would invest in other people’s dreams, focusing his resources, time and energy on helping people.
But that was his future. In the now, the one woman he needed to believe in him couldn’t. The agony lancing through his heart pushed him toward self-destructive behaviors. The old Asher would lose himself in fun. And nothing said fun like a lively party with a large group of friends. Since he wasn’t allowed to go anywhere without Lani, he would just have to bring the party here.
Since he doubted very many people would show up for his benefit, Asher reached out to Gina for help.
“Call everyone you know. We’re throwing a party at Elegance Ranch.”
“Are you sure this is a good time?” she countered.
“It’s the perfect time. Rusty’s out of town and I’m stuck on house arrest.”
“It’s going to end up being a pretty small affair.” She sounded as low as Asher felt.
They hadn’t spoken much since he’d been released from jail, but he’d texted her often to check in. Despite still smarting over the way she’d turned her back on him, they were family and he loved her.
“Even if there’s only twenty or thirty people, it will be a party.” Easing up on the forced optimism, he added, “And I really need this.”
“I’ll see what I can do.”
She grudgingly offered suggestions for a fun-filled, family-friendly barbecue with a guest list including their usual complement of friends from the Texas Cattleman’s Club—or at least the ones who were still talking to them—but also those in Royal who’d suffered because of what happened with the festival. Fearing that no one would show up if they thought he was involved, he suggested that she leave his name off the invitation.
Fifteen minutes after he’d hung up with Gina, Ross’s number lit up Asher’s phone.
“A party?” Ross demanded. “Are you out of your mind? This is no time to celebrate anything.”
It wasn’t a celebration, but a distraction. A way to keep from brooding over the implosion of his relationship with Lani and the bleak future that lay ahead of him.
“I’m stuck here alone with nothing to do,” Asher complained.
“You’re on house arrest,” Ross snapped. “I don’t think throwing parties is going to enhance your reputation.”
“I’m not throwing a party. You and Gina are.”
Asher hadn’t really expected his brother to understand. Practical Ross had never related to the restlessness that drove Asher. His identity had always been cemented in being the heir to one of the wealthiest men in the country. That Ross suffered the same neglect as Asher didn’t negate the blood bond.
“This isn’t a good idea.”
“No, it’s a great idea.” And one that Asher hoped would prove to Lani that he would make an excellent partner for her. “Oh, and make sure you invite Billy. It wouldn’t be a party without him.”
Eleven
Still reeling from the fight with Asher the day before, Lani buckled herself into her seat for the three-hour flight from Dallas to Las Vegas. Her stomach flipped as her phone rang. Hoping it was Asher, she glanced down at the screen but the caller was Kingston Blue.
“Hey,” she began as the plane filled up around her. “I’m on my way to Vegas,”
She’d snagged a window seat and watched the grounds crew load luggage under the plane. Since she only needed a few necessities for her quick trip, her own bag sat in the compartment above her head.
“What’s in Las Vegas?” Kingston Blue asked, his voice hard and suspicious.
Apparently her people skills were in the toilet. Not only had she damaged her relationship with Asher, but her credibility with her client was dangling by a thread.
“A woman by the name of Antoinette Holmes,” Lani explained. “She’s Billy Holmes’s mother.”
A charged silence radiated from the phone. She gnawed on her lip, imagining the grim tension in Kingston’s face. As much as she didn’t want to argue with the musician, she believed in her investigative skills and in Asher’s innocence.
“Look, I know you don’t agree with the direction I’m taking the investigation, but you hired me to find the money and I really don’t think Asher’s your guy.” Her voice heated as her confidence flared. “If you want me off the case, I understand, but I’m still going to investigate Billy Holmes.”
“How much of this has to do with your personal relationship with Asher Edmond?” While the edge had come off Kingston’s tone, he sounded no less dubious. “You were in love with him once. Can you assure me that’s not interfering with your judgment now?”
Lani breathed a sigh of relief that her client was willing to hear her out. This she could handle. After all, for the last five years she’d been telling herself that falling for Asher had been a huge mistake and one thing she never did was screw up twice.
“When you first approached me with the job, I wanted him to be guilty. Things didn’t end well between us and I thought maybe he was finally going to have to take responsibility for a mistake he’d made.”
Initially, she’d intended to demonstrate to her treacherous heart that Asher was a lying, manipulative, selfish jerk who’d toyed with her for fun and thus banish him from her daydreams forever.
“So what changed?” Kingston asked.
“I’m a professional. I approached this case by looking at the facts.” Never mind that one glimpse of Asher looking exhausted and defeated in that jail cell had started to change the polarity of her emotions. “Which resulted in me interviewing several people and finding out that Billy Holmes had a sketchy past and an odd fixation on Rusty Edmond.”
“But what does any of that mean?”
“I don’t know, but I’m hoping to find some answers by talking to his mother.”
“Fine. Keep me updated.”
Lani ended the call, relieved that the musician appeared appeased for the moment. As the announcement came to stow all electronic devices, her mind went back to the last conversation she’d had with Asher. She recognized that letting him think his father had hired her had been a mistake. When she landed in Las Vegas, she would let him know that she’d spoken with Kingston and relayed her opinion about Asher no longer being her prime suspect.
Not that she believed this would be enough for him to forgive her. She hadn’t understood about the strained relationship between Rusty and his adopted son or the pain Asher had felt at being either ignored or criticized by the only father figure he’d ever had.
As the plane taxied toward the runway, she closed her eyes and mentally reviewed what she’d dug up on Billy Holmes.
He’d grown up in Las Vegas, raised by a single mom.
Without any luggage to pic
k up at baggage claim, Lani secured a rental car and was on her way to meet Billy’s mom. Antoinette Holmes was a cocktail waitress at a downtown casino and lived just east of the city center in a second-floor apartment in an older complex.
Lani was careful not to trip on the chipped concrete as she strode past a pool in desperate need of refurbishing. Feeling the heat radiating off the sun-bleached door of apartment number twelve, Lani used the corner of her phone, instead of her knuckles, to rap.
The face of the woman who answered the door looked much older than fifty-nine beneath her heavy makeup. Years of harsh desert sunshine and hard living had taken its toll on Antoinette’s skin. Yet Lani could tell Billy’s mother had once been a beauty.
“Antoinette Holmes?” Lani spoke the woman’s name like a question although she already knew the answer.
“Yes?” The woman rested her left hand on her hip. Her slender fingers were tipped with long bright blue nails adorned with rhinestones. They matched her blue workout pants and matching sports bra. Antoinette’s face might’ve showed her age, but her trim body did not.
“My name is Lani Li. I’m a private investigator from Dallas, Texas, and I was wondering if I could speak to you for a few minutes.”
When she had indicated she was from Texas, Antoinette’s eyebrows had risen. Now, however, as she raked her gaze over Lani’s jeans, pale blue T-shirt and boots, the older woman’s expression shifted from surprise to caution.
“What about?”
Not wanting to fidget and give Antoinette any sense that this inquiry was anything other than routine, Lani resisted the urge to wipe at the sweat trickling down her temple. Dallas had been in the upper eighties when she’d left. Las Vegas was already well into triple-digit temperatures and the heat index continued to climb as the sun crept toward its zenith in a cloudless sky of vivid blue.
“I’m doing some background work on your son, Billy,” Lani declared blandly. “And I have a few questions only you can answer.”
“What sort of questions?” The waitress looked poised to slam the door in Lani’s face if she didn’t like the answer.