by J. Lynn
Before the rehearsal, she’d gone to the edge of the property and made a call that had nearly killed her. Her question had been met with shock and a promise to meet up and discuss a few days after she returned home. Hating what she had put into motion, but knowing there was no other option, she blinked back hot tears. It was the first step in the right direction—one that didn’t include Chase Gamble in her future.
…
Chase was frustrated, confused, and a whole lot of pissed off as he stared at Maddie’s retreating back. Off and on throughout the years, he and Maddie’d had their spats. Usually over some lame-ass guy she was dating, and after the night in his club, they’d had moments of awkwardness, but this? Never had it been like this.
His hands opened and closed at his sides. Part of him—a huge part—wanted to go to her, pull her into his arms, and kiss the common sense back into her, but the other part was wary of all of this, of Maddie. He just couldn’t figure it out. What the hell had he done wrong that had her so spitting mad at him?
Ever since he discovered her gone that morning and settled in to a new cabin, he wanted nothing more than to go to her. What he was going to do with her once he got her he wasn’t sure, but he was off kilter and out of his element in this.
His heart thundered in his chest as he crossed the distance between them. Propping his hip against the railing, he folded his arms. “Why are you hiding from me?”
Those beautiful eyes were closed to him, her lips pinched. “Chase, do we…do we really need to do this?”
“What do you think?” He paused. “This isn’t like you.”
She drew in a breath and it sounded sharp to him. Her lashes swept up and he saw that her eyes were glassy. There was that punch-to-his-stomach feeling. “I’m sorry for being such a bitch in there, but I haven’t eaten anything all day, and I think I get moody when I’m low on sugar or something.”
“Maddie, I—”
“But we do need to talk about what happened last night.” She smiled, but it seemed forced and ugly on her lips. “You were right.”
For a moment, shock and surprise held him. “I was?”
“Yes. Last night needed to happen.”
Okay, maybe this conversation was going to be better than he realized. Chase started to relax, but she went on, and damn if it didn’t feel like the world was pulled right out from under his feet.
“We needed to get this—whatever it is—out of our systems,” she said, her gaze drifting beyond him to where the setting sun cast an orangey glow over the grape trees. “And we did. Things are normal now, right? We’re still friends. And we can move on. That’s what you wanted—what I want.”
Taken aback, he unfolded his arms slowly. That age-old saying filled his head. Be careful what you wish for… But it wasn’t what he wished for. He had no intentions of getting what he wanted and moving on. Better yet, what the hell was happening? What did she think?
“What are you guys doing out here?” Mitch called from the door. “Everyone is waiting for you two to start eating, and you know how Dad gets. He’s about to eat the tablecloth.”
Blinking rapidly, Maddie laughed as she twisted toward her brother. “We were just watching the sunset, but we’re heading in now.”
Stunned, Chase watched her walk up to her brother, hugging him tightly before she disappeared back into the lodge. He stood there, incapable of moving or even processing what had just happened. Why was he so shocked? It was what he’d offered—what he’d initially wanted…initially being the key word.
Fuck. That was all he could think.
“You doing okay, man?” Mitch asked, striding away from the door. He stopped in front of Chase, eyes narrowed. “You’re not looking too good.”
Chase blinked. “Yeah, I’m…I’m fine.”
“You sure?” Mitch’s gaze turned shrewd. “You’re looking a lot like Madison has been.”
Chase stiffened. Denials formed on the tip of his tongue but nothing came out.
Several moments passed and then Mitch cracked a half smile. “Look, I hate seeing you like this. You’ve always been there for me growing up. Remember when Jimmy Decker stole my bike?”
Chase laughed at the unexpected memory. “Yeah, I do.”
Mitch grinned. “You stole it back but replaced it with one that had the hand brakes cut. When Jimmy went down the hill…” He trailed off with a laugh. “You’re the kind of friend who would—”
“Help bury the body, I know.” He laughed. “By the way, that brake cutting was really Chad’s idea.”
“Doesn’t surprised me, but seriously, man, you’re a good dude. I don’t know what’s really going on between you and my sister—and don’t tell me nothing is, because I have eyes and I know both of you.”
Well, damn…
“And I don’t know what you’re thinking,” Mitch continued. “I’m not sure I want to, but you’re a good guy, Chase. And my sister has always been in love with you.”
Chase’s gut clenched. My sister has always been in love with you. Right up until a few seconds ago when she explained last night had meant nothing more than scratching an itch. Just like he’d suggested in the first place… He thought of the roses wilting in the trashcan. Fuck. How he’d planned to christen that updated cabin…
He cleared his throat, surprised to find his voice so hoarse. “Nothing…nothing is going on with us.”
“Bull,” Mitch said. “I don’t have any problems with you going after her. So if you are waiting on my permission, then you have it as long as you do right by her.” His eyes met Chase’s. “You get what I’m saying?”
“I do.” Chase’s voice cracked.
Mitch clasped him on the shoulder. “Now, come on. It’s time to eat, celebrate, be merry, and all that shit.”
He felt his head nod, but he’d gone numb, completely cold. The irony of everything was a giant F-U. The obstacles that had always held him back from claiming what he wanted were now removed, and it meant nothing.
Pain that felt so very real sliced him in the chest. He took a breath, but it felt like he wasn’t breathing at all. His legs were moving, but he wasn’t feeling them.
Be careful what you wish for…
He should’ve, because he got it, and it settled in his stomach like a ten-pound weight.
Chapter Eleven
Lissa looked absolutely stunning in her wedding gown. Strapless with a heart-shaped bodice, it was corseted around the waist and slim through the hips, and it floated around her legs like a spring rose blossoming. A fine layer of pearls had been added to the delicate chiffon overlay.
It was a beautiful dress for a beautiful woman, and if Madison ever got married one day, she wanted a dress like this: fresh but also classic.
Madison straightened the last pearl in Lissa’s hair and smiled. “You look amazing.”
“Thank you.” Lissa hugged her and then cast a fond look at their mothers. Both of them were clutching tissues like they were going out of style. “Do you think they’ll make it through this?”
“I hope so.” Madison grinned, stepping back so that Lissa had a few moments with the one of the bridesmaids.
Retreating to the window in the room off from the reception hall, she watched the guests file up the pathway. Outside, Chad and Chandler hovered with a couple of friends from college.
Chase was nowhere to be seen.
Since she had said what needed to be said, he’d kept his distance from her. Which was what she had wanted, but her chest ached, and she was still so very hungry to just be around him.
When Chase had come in after she’d left him on the deck, he had said nothing to her. Didn’t even try to approach her once, and after the rehearsal dinner, he’d disappeared with his brother. Obviously he had heard what he needed to and now could rest assured. They were still friends. Everything was normal. The night of passion they shared was already a thing of the past. It was over.
Well, it would be over when she met with her superintendent.
/> Shaking herself out of her thoughts, she focused on what was going on around her. Mitch and Lissa deserved for her to be here with them, fully here and not just a shell of herself sulking over her own love life.
When it came time to prepare for the bridal march, she was nervous for Lissa and her brother, anxious over seeing Chase, and praying she didn’t trip on the hem of her dress.
Out in the hallway, she spotted his broad shoulders. Taking a deep, fortifying breath, she manned up and went to his side, just like the other bridesmaids with their escorts.
As the soft melody played from the white-rose-decorated reception hall, she tapped him on his shoulder. He turned, his expression impassive, eyes a steely blue.
“You ready?” she asked, smiling until her cheeks hurt. She wasn’t going to do anything that ruined this wedding.
“Of course.” He offered his arm, and as she tried not to be affected by how the coldness in his voice stung her, she wrapped her arm around his. A moment passed and he said, “You look beautiful, Maddie.”
A pleasant flush swept across her cheeks and down her throat, almost mirroring the crimson Grecian-style dress. Her heart tripped over itself. She glanced at him and their eyes met for a fraction of a second before she tilted her head to the side, letting the stream of hair shield her face.
“Thank you,” she whispered. “You look great, too.”
He took the compliment in the usual Chase fashion and nodded. Awkward silence stretched out between them and it seemed unbelievable that it had ever been any other way. To be honest, Madison wasn’t sure why Chase was giving her the cold shoulder. He was the one who wanted their night to be a one-night stand. He was the one who’d left. All she did was try and salvage a bit of her pride and tell him she agreed. What the heck more did he want from her?
Heart heavy, she lifted her chin as she heard the cue of the music. Before them, each couple entered the hall, smiling. And then it was their turn. From deep inside, she found the happiness and affection she felt for her brother and Lissa. The smile that spread across her face was genuine, even though her heart was breaking inside.
Because after this weekend, she really wouldn’t see Chase everywhere like before. A door would be opening this weekend for some while a door would be closing for her.
Each row was full of family and friends. Standing-room only, she realized, overjoyed to know that so many people loved her brother and Lissa. It did wonders for the melancholy that was threatening to rise up and swallow her whole.
The arm around hers tensed halfway down the aisle, and she glanced at Chase. His gaze was questioning and concerned.
But her smile remained throughout the romantic ceremony. Her brother was incredibly cute, turning into this clumsy, near–emotional wreck as he held Lissa’s hand and repeated the words that would bind them together, through sickness and health. And when tears filled her eyes, threatening to ruin all the hard work on her mascara and eyeliner, it was because of how truly in love Lissa and her brother were. Her heart swelled and ached at the same time.
The way they kept gazing at each other throughout the ceremony stole her breath and when it came to that moment, when the words You may now kiss the bride were spoken, she realized that was what true love looked like.
Clutching the small white rose bouquet in her hands, she sniffed back tears.
Guests shot to their feet and cheered. Tears fell freely, and Madison choked on a small laugh as Mitch swept his arm around the waist of his new wife, dipped her low, and kissed her in a way a sister should never see her brother kissing.
As Lissa and Mitch parted, laughing and smiling at each other, Madison’s eyes met Chase’s. There was a world of secrets in his gaze, a world that had and always would be locked to her. She’d had the briefest, sweetest taste, and she would savor it.
…
Silverware clinked, nearly muted by the laughter and hum of conversation from the main table and the smaller round ones surrounding it.
Chase laughed at something Chad said as he scanned the rows of smiling faces. His eyes stopped on one in particular.
Maddie.
Damn, she looked absolutely beautiful. The crimson gown accented her alabaster skin and dark hair, not to mention it clung in all the places that had his blood racing to a certain part of his anatomy. Not that it had stopped racing to that place since he’d first laid eyes on Maddie this weekend.
God, he wanted to take her away, some place private. His fingers burned to skim the heart-shaped neckline. Watch the peaks of her breasts tighten under his gaze, feel the slight tremble as his hand slipped under the gown.
Chase shifted in his seat as he watched her from behind hooded eyes.
A small, tight-lipped smile crossed her delicate features and her eyes seemed to dance under the low lights and candlelight, but he knew something was up with her. He just wished he could figure out where it’d all gone wrong. He could have sworn when he’d gotten up that morning they were both finally on the same page.
Acid gnawed at his belly like no tomorrow. He tried to convince himself that it was an ulcer. Hell, an ulcer would be better than what really had his insides churning and spinning on themselves.
All night, Chase had tossed and turned like he’d drunk a bucket of coffee. Maddie’s words lingered with him long after they’d been said. He replayed them over and over again, analyzing them like an obsessive teenage girl. That’s what he’d been lowered to. Damn.
Chase leaned back in his seat, idly turning the stem of his flute of champagne.
The way things had been left between them wasn’t good, and it made him all kinds of itchy giving her the space she obviously wanted.
He felt like shit, unsure if it were something physical or more. Throughout the day, he’d convinced himself that when he returned to the city, there’d be enough going on to distract him. There was the responsibility of running his clubs to lose himself in; the plans to open a fourth, which meant a lot of meetings to occupy his time; and there were women…
Chase’s stomach soured at the thought, and he didn’t like it.
His gaze slid back to where she sat beside her parents. Shit. He needed to stop staring at her like a lovesick hound. Someone was bound to notice. Hell, people had already noticed, including Mitch.
Against his will and common sense, he was staring at Maddie again, practically willing her to look up and notice him.
And she did.
Chase sucked in a breath, barely aware that Mitch had stood and was giving a toast to his new wife. He wasn’t hearing a damn thing except the pulse pounding in his ears. A simple look from her and his body was already coming alive. He was hard as forged steel. Freaking ridiculous. Aw hell, it was more than that—this instantaneous physical reaction that just wouldn’t go away.
“To us!” Mitch cheered, holding up his champagne glass. “To our future!”
Madison raised hers, her gaze still locked with his. Her lips moved, mirroring the same words he murmured, “To our future.”
Chapter Twelve
Chase woke up Sunday morning, covered in a cold sweat. Either he was coming down with the plague or he was having withdrawals from the pollution and smog of DC.
Or it was something entirely different and it had a name.
Maddie.
He rolled onto his side, opening his eyes and squinting at the rays of sun seeping in under the blinds. One look at the clock, and he knew he didn’t have a whole lot of time to lie in bed. Mitch and Lissa would be leaving soon for their honeymoon in the Bahamas, and Chase wanted to see them off.
There was also a hidden agenda.
Chase wanted to see Maddie, and he hoped he could corner her before she left for the city. They needed to talk, and with the wedding celebrations over, it would be the perfect time to do so. No distractions. No family or friends lingering around to overhear the conversation. No way for her to escape.
Kicking off the sheets that were twisted around his hips, he stood and stretched. It had
taken until the wee hours of the night, but Chase had finally figured out what had Maddie running scared. She’d claimed she just wanted to be friends now, but he was calling bullshit on that. If that were the case, she wouldn’t have been so offended when he’d suggested hooking up. And she wouldn’t have been his little shadow for the last several years.
No. She was lying. Lying to protect herself, and he got that. After all, he’d done nothing to show her that he felt any differently than what he’d been saying all these years, that he was no better than his father. If anything, he’d proven she was right time and time again. The first time had been the opening of the nightclub.
Stepping under the hot spray of the shower, he cursed. Remembering how delectable she looked in her black dress that night, staring at him with those wide, innocent eyes, and he was hard as a rock.
He had wanted her then, had come so close to taking her right there on the couch in his office. Her brother hadn’t been the only thing that had stopped him. Maddie had deserved better than that. But when he pulled back and came to his senses, he couldn’t believe what he had almost done. So the next day, like a total ass with good intentions, he’d apologized to her and claimed that he’d been drunk.
Then he’d gone out with every woman who looked nothing like Maddie, just so he could get her out of his head. He’d masked his desire to be near her as something brotherly, when in reality—which he could admit to now—it was a need to be with her.
Placing his hands on the wet tile of the shower, he tipped his head back and closed his eyes. Deep down he’d always known how much he cared for her, that it went beyond affection and into the realm of the big L-word, but he never accepted it, never dared to even acknowledge it.
But now he did, and there was no way he could let her go.
Showered, changed, and determined as hell, he headed up to the main cabin, not surprised to find his brothers and most of the Daniels family there.
Mitch and Lissa were busy saying good-bye while fending off smartass comments from Chase’s brothers. His eyes scanned the crowd of waiting people, searching out the face he needed to see most.